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Meeting women through your friends

Discuss dating, relationships and foreign women.

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Meeting women through your friends

Postby jamesbond » Mon Mar 01, 2010 5:06 pm

I read an article on the internet a couple of years ago that said 78% of women in the US preferred to meet guys through their friends. The reason being is that the women felt more comfortable meeting a guy this way, as opposed to meeting guys randomly at bars, clubs, grocery stores, bookstores, etc. I can understand how a woman would feel more comfortable meeting guys through their friends but the problem is for us guys, what happens if our friends don't have any female friends that they can introduce to us?

My friends don't have any single female friends that they can introduce me to. When I was in college, I was able to meet girls through my friends. Since I have been out of college, I have been pretty much shit-out-of-luck as far as meeting women through my friends! :shock:

I know Winston has said he bombed out as far as trying to meet girls through his friends when he was living in the US. If his friends had any available single female friends they would tell him, the girl would not want to date him, because he wasn't their type.

Has anybody here had any luck meeting girls through their friends?
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Postby Adama » Mon Mar 01, 2010 7:26 pm

I remember hearing that same figure on the radio around 2004. My comeback joke is that the other 22% of people meet their spouses through their enemies! :twisted:

Yeah, if your friends dont know women or if all the women they know are fat then you are out of luck.

You cant really approach women on the street or in the malls and clubs here. Some people say you can approach women at the coffee shops and Barnes & Nobles bookstores. I dont believe it though.
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Postby dano » Mon Mar 01, 2010 7:59 pm

I thought of one angle you might want to pursue. Some public libraries have adult literacy programs and often look for volunteer tutors. Volunteering as a english tutor would be a good way to meet recently landed immigrants. Most immigrant communties are tight knit and they will know any single women looking for a boyfriend and are usually happy to play the role of matchmaker.

Also, international student associations at local colleges and universities accept volunteers from the community to help organize activities for students. This might be a good way to meet foreign women in your home town.

I'm rather jaded and I sincerely believe dating western women is a complete waste of time. You should only date them if you enjoy torturing yourself. I've dated lots of blue eyed, blonde haired women and I never met one I wasn't happy to get rid of.
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Postby Adama » Mon Mar 01, 2010 8:03 pm

Forget American women. As I always say, if it hasnt worked out before now, it probably isnt going to work out. That goes right along with the definition of insanity (doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result).

Dano does have a point. I know two Filipina women who wanted to introduce me to one of their single friends. Thing is though, those two Filipina women I know are over 30 and overweight. Their friend is 30 or maybe 31 now, and if she is single, I wonder if she is just plain unattractive. (That may be bad logic on my part, but still, it makes sense to me!)

So I took a pass. Besides that, who wants to get dissed by an unattractive woman? Certainly not me.
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American Female Farce...

Postby Nate » Mon Mar 01, 2010 8:14 pm

jamesbond wrote:I read an article on the internet a couple of years ago that said 78% of women in the US preferred to meet guys through their friends. The reason being is that the women felt more comfortable meeting a guy this way, as opposed to meeting guys randomly at bars, clubs, grocery stores, bookstores, etc. I can understand how a woman would feel more comfortable meeting guys through their friends but the problem is for us guys, what happens if our friends don't have any female friends that they can introduce to us?

My friends don't have any single female friends that they can introduce me to. When I was in college, I was able to meet girls through my friends. Since I have been out of college, I have been pretty much shit-out-of-luck as far as meeting women through my friends! :shock:

I know Winston has said he bombed out as far as trying to meet girls through his friends when he was living in the US. If his friends had any available single female friends they would tell him, the girl would not want to date him, because he wasn't their type.

Has anybody here had any luck meeting girls through their friends?


I really don't get it. Perhaps it comes from those who have not yet lived abroad and seen what the world has to offer.
The unspoken implication or possible inference from much of what is submitted on this forum, whether about "tips" for meeting women, or so called PA techniques is that the interest in women abroad comes from some lack of ability with American women, so one must go for a "cheaper" foreign version, you know, the poor desperate type who will look past all my social ineptitude. Well I am not judging those who in fact have problems meeting women in the USA. The USA is an alienating unfriendly place. SO WHY IN THE HELL WOULD YOU WANT TO MEET OR MATE WITH WOMEN FROM SUCH A CULTURE AND PERSPECTIVE??? Wake up!
I am fully able to meet women in the USA anytime. I am just an average looking guy with perhaps a bit of charisma, who has dated and mated with some of the prettiest girls around. A former GF was a pretty working model who worked out of San Francisco, and would turn heads wherever we went. So what, underneath it all she was a shrew, and really screwed in the head. Again, a product of the culture.
You have to start thinking differently if you want success. One best chooses a girl overseas because they are often just better people all around, and way hotter too. I am now past 50 years of age, though in pretty good shape. Most of the year I am overseas, usually in the Philippines (in the south). My girlfriend(age 24) is mentally healthy, smart, (well educated, 4 year degree) and really hard to find fault with.She has an even calm disposition and is very easy to get along with. She is dedicated and loyal and receives that from me as well.
She is kind of nympho I guess, for which I will forgive her... :lol: . She is not average looking even in the Philippines...she has no attitude or anything like that...she is instead DROP DEAD gorgeous, about 5' 4", slender, and perfectly endowed....the kind of girl that would make guys run into walls if she is walking in the mall...long black hair down the middle of her back and a perfect skin.
This is not settling for "second best". I would not trade her for any woman I have even known in the USA.

>>>I am not talking this up to gloat. I am simply making the point that one can have this kind of success if you completely get outside the USA mindset, and if you are still thinking about how to meet girls in the USA, or PA bullshit, you have not succeeded.
Beyond that, I live like a king in the Philippines on not much money every month.

Get your passport, find a way to make it work for you...find a new world and live in it...do it like your life was at stake, because in fact it is!


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Postby jamesbond » Tue Mar 02, 2010 11:58 am

J.Adama wrote:I remember hearing that same figure on the radio around 2004. My comeback joke is that the other 22% of people meet their spouses through their enemies! :twisted:

Yeah, if your friends dont know women or if all the women they know are fat then you are out of luck.

You cant really approach women on the street or in the malls and clubs here. Some people say you can approach women at the coffee shops and Barnes & Nobles bookstores. I dont believe it though.


Yeah I have never met a guy who has met a woman in a bookstore, grocery store or coffee shop. Guys either meet women at bars, clubs, parties or through their friends. These pickup artists who say "you can meet women at bookstores, grocery stores, etc." well, I would love to see them do that in real life!
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Postby jamesbond » Sun Mar 21, 2010 7:05 pm

The thing about meeting women through your friends is that if that's the only option you have, your then at the mercy of whoever your friends introduce you to. If the girl is such a great "catch" your buddies probably want to get with her and don't want to introduce her to anyone. Of course if the girl is fat or ugly or a single mother, then your friends will be more than happy to introduce the girl to you! lol :lol:
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Postby Adama » Mon Mar 22, 2010 3:30 am

jamesbond wrote:
J.Adama wrote:I remember hearing that same figure on the radio around 2004. My comeback joke is that the other 22% of people meet their spouses through their enemies! :twisted:

Yeah, if your friends dont know women or if all the women they know are fat then you are out of luck.

You cant really approach women on the street or in the malls and clubs here. Some people say you can approach women at the coffee shops and Barnes & Nobles bookstores. I dont believe it though.


Yeah I have never met a guy who has met a woman in a bookstore, grocery store or coffee shop. Guys either meet women at bars, clubs, parties or through their friends. These pickup artists who say "you can meet women at bookstores, grocery stores, etc." well, I would love to see them do that in real life!


The friends that I have all met their GFs through work situations. Some of them were lucky enough to hook up with foreign born women. My one Puerto Rican friend met a Chinese born American at his job (they werent working at the same place though). He was so reluctant to go with her. She wasnt easy like he wanted. I told him that is a good thing; that he ought to dump the sluts and take her.

About 6 months later, I call him, and I find out he married the Chinese girl and dumped all those stupid whores he was dealing with.

There is no long term success with AWs. Since none of us here married our high school sweethearts, we can safely assume it is over, cause the good ones who are marriageable value marriage and get married to the first guy they deem worthy, instead of waiting around and slutting it up to find themselves.

I think by age 22 AWs are done. That is University graduation age. Tons of men around in college. She could have had her pick of the litter. If she isnt engaged or married by age 23, you know she is one of those career sluts who uses finding a career as an excuse to sleep around til she is 29 and ready to search for "THE ONE" (cue Matrix theme).
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Postby jamesbond » Wed Jun 25, 2014 8:30 pm

Adama wrote:Since none of us here married our high school sweethearts, we can safely assume it is over, cause the good ones who are marriageable value marriage and get married to the first guy they deem worthy, instead of waiting around and slutting it up to find themselves.

I think by age 22 AWs are done. That is University graduation age. Tons of men around in college. She could have had her pick of the litter. If she isnt engaged or married by age 23, you know she is one of those career sluts who uses finding a career as an excuse to sleep around til she is 29 and ready to search for "THE ONE" (cue Matrix theme).


Your right, most of the desirable women meet their future husbands in either college or high school, some even in grade school.

Like Winston has said, in America, it's almost like your not supposed to be looking to meet anyone after you get out of school. Your supposed to focus on your career and not be looking to meet people.

Most of the good, attractive women are married or engaged by age 25. What's left are the women who are sluts and women who are fat and ugly.
:shock:

I can't believe how many people in America still marry their high school or college sweethearts. There is nothing wrong with that but it really goes to show that the good women are all taken by the time they get out of school.
"When I think about the idea of getting involved with an American woman, I don't know if I should laugh .............. or vomit!"

"Trying to meet women in America is like trying to decipher Egyptian hieroglyphics."
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Postby fightforlove » Mon Jul 14, 2014 4:03 pm

I've never had any luck meeting attractive women through friends. My college circle was primarily male engineering/science students and we had no interaction with females. My post-college guy friends have come from more varied backgrounds, but are also equally inept. Most of them are clueless, they cannot help me and I cannot help them. I realized a few years ago that, with one exception, my closest guy friends were holding me back, I do better when I seek out women on my own. I approach/daygame women on my own and have seeked them out online, including my last LTR.
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Postby Jester » Mon Jul 14, 2014 9:16 pm

Adama wrote:
I think by age 22 AWs are done. That is University graduation age. Tons of men around in college. She could have had her pick of the litter. If she isnt engaged or married by age 23, you know she is one of those career sluts who uses finding a career as an excuse to sleep around til she is 29 and ready to search for "THE ONE" (cue Matrix theme).


A fair assessment.
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Re: Meeting women through your friends

Postby MeGustanLatinas » Mon Jul 14, 2014 9:23 pm

jamesbond wrote:I read an article on the internet a couple of years ago that said 78% of women in the US preferred to meet guys through their friends. The reason being is that the women felt more comfortable meeting a guy this way, as opposed to meeting guys randomly at bars, clubs, grocery stores, bookstores, etc. I can understand how a woman would feel more comfortable meeting guys through their friends but the problem is for us guys, what happens if our friends don't have any female friends that they can introduce to us?

My friends don't have any single female friends that they can introduce me to. When I was in college, I was able to meet girls through my friends. Since I have been out of college, I have been pretty much shit-out-of-luck as far as meeting women through my friends! :shock:

I know Winston has said he bombed out as far as trying to meet girls through his friends when he was living in the US. If his friends had any available single female friends they would tell him, the girl would not want to date him, because he wasn't their type.

Has anybody here had any luck meeting girls through their friends?


All of my American friends who are married tell me they met their wives this way. Either through a friend or another family member who knew an available woman. Only one met his future wife when he was conducting surveys at the mall.
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Postby fightforlove » Wed Jul 16, 2014 4:14 pm

Adama wrote:I think by age 22 AWs are done. That is University graduation age. Tons of men around in college. She could have had her pick of the litter. If she isnt engaged or married by age 23, you know she is one of those career sluts who uses finding a career as an excuse to sleep around til she is 29 and ready to search for "THE ONE" (cue Matrix theme).


I think college-educated women are quite busy in their mid-20s. School, work, grad school, partying with their girls, moving to different cities for work/school, the trips to Italy and Greece... If they're not married it's not necessarily that they're deliberately being sluts (not consciously at least). :P

Women around 23-27 want to have relationships, but they are quite busy and have lofty standards. They are told that the world is their oyster, that they're at the top of the market, and technically they are. Many of them are not lucky enough to meet and hold down the super hot guy they crave. At about 28 the crisis begins and they finally get more pro-active about finding a man and having more reasonable standards. By this point, even the most quality of girls have probably acquired some baggage and slutted it up a little. What's sad is that many a starved man whom they previously would have rejected will date/marry these women. I guess many of these pairings will work out, however I personally think that this model is not nearly the ideal that was intended for women and men. Some will end in divorce and a good chuck of the "successful" ones will be dysfunctional with both parties perpetually half-satisfied, half-frustrated.
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