Join John Adams, world renowned Intl Matchmaker, Thurs nights 8:30 EST for Live Webcasts with FREE Prizes!
And check out Five Reasons why you should attend a FREE Live AFA Seminar! See locations and details.


Scam free! Check out Christian Filipina - Meet Asian women with Christian values! Members screened.
Exclusive book offer! 75% off! How to Meet, Date and Marry Your Filipina Wife



View Active Topics       Latest 100 Topics       View Your Posts       FAQ Topics       Switch to Mobile


French women's attitude toward relationships and men

Discuss dating, relationships and foreign women.

Moderators: jamesbond, fschmidt

French women's attitude toward relationships and men

Postby Winston » Fri Jul 09, 2010 4:20 pm

Check out this author interview who lived in France for 10 years and married a French guy. She reveals some awesome comparisons between the French attitude toward men, love, sex, flirting, etc. and the American. Wow. I think I'd fit in with French culture very well, based on what she said. Check out the interview. It's very eye opening and easy to follow, with so many interesting comparisons.



It's interesting that she noted that flirting in France is ingrained in the culture and NEVER considered creepy or inappropriate. Even old ladies flirt with young guys there and it's normal. It's never taken in a bad way. And there are no sexual harassment suits there over it. Also, the feminists there do not hate men, unlike in the US. In fact, French girls never make fun of men or diss them. And she noted that there will NEVER be a battle of the sexes in France. It's a much more "love friendly" culture. Also, French women are very religious about not gaining any extra weight, so there are virtually no fat women in France.

Wow. I love such atttitudes. I think I would fit in well with that culture.
Last edited by Winston on Sun Jan 06, 2013 7:52 am, edited 4 times in total.
Check out the latest posts in our blog The Happier Abroaders.

Don't forget my HA Grand Ebook and Dating Sites!

"It takes far less effort to find and move to the society that has what you want than it does to try to reconstruct an existing society to match your standards." - Harry Browne, How I Found Freedom in an Unfree World
User avatar
Winston
Site Admin
 
Posts: 23596
Joined: Sat Aug 18, 2007 1:16 pm







Postby BellaRuth » Fri Jul 09, 2010 4:26 pm

I love France but the thing about there being 'no fat women' is rubbish, the French all look British to me, and Lord knows we're not all willowy nymphs. May have been true in the past but not so anymore.

I would recommend anyone take a visit there though, it's a lovely country, and if you like cheese you'll be in heaven.
Toute connaissance est une réponse à une question. - Gaston Bachelard
BellaRuth
Freshman Poster
 
Posts: 231
Joined: Sat May 29, 2010 9:37 pm
Location: UK

Postby Winston » Fri Jul 09, 2010 4:47 pm

BellaRuth wrote:I love France but the thing about there being 'no fat women' is rubbish, the French all look British to me, and Lord knows we're not all willowy nymphs. May have been true in the past but not so anymore.

I would recommend anyone take a visit there though, it's a lovely country, and if you like cheese you'll be in heaven.


Well I'm sure there are a lot less fat women than in the US, at least not in the same extremes and standards. Were you there? Is what that lady said in the rest of the interview true?
Check out the latest posts in our blog The Happier Abroaders.

Don't forget my HA Grand Ebook and Dating Sites!

"It takes far less effort to find and move to the society that has what you want than it does to try to reconstruct an existing society to match your standards." - Harry Browne, How I Found Freedom in an Unfree World
User avatar
Winston
Site Admin
 
Posts: 23596
Joined: Sat Aug 18, 2007 1:16 pm

Postby BellaRuth » Fri Jul 09, 2010 5:20 pm

I just watched it now. A few points:

Americans make jokes about sexless marriages? Here in UK we wouldn't, like the French. It would be a bit... hm. Like you are about to divorce and are stressed and coming out with way too much personal info. It's assumed everyone in marriages are happy with their sex lives, and if you're not, you should be sorting it out instead of telling others about it. It would be a bit weird.

Also agree with her about dating. Same in the UK. You don't have these dating rules, you just go out and get to know each other and see where it develops.

On the secrets thing, same here in UK, Americans are seen as overly confessional.

About flirting, I dunno, I can't comment too well as I was with girls in France. And obviously girls always get flirted with, so it was no big deal. Unless girls don't get flirted with in the US? I dunno, I was with my mum in her late 50s today and we always get propositions, it's pretty funny. From a guy in his twenties saying he will have either of us depending on who was interested or an old man asking me if he'd have a chance with me if he was 17 (obviously he thought I was 17, bonus!). Is this creepy in America? Here, it's funny and sweet.

Yes I've been to France. I wouldn't say there were a lot of fat people but they all looked normal size to me. Never been to America but can't compare.
Toute connaissance est une réponse à une question. - Gaston Bachelard
BellaRuth
Freshman Poster
 
Posts: 231
Joined: Sat May 29, 2010 9:37 pm
Location: UK

Postby Winston » Fri Jul 09, 2010 5:29 pm

Hell ya! Flirting is dangerous in America. It can be seen as inappropriate easily. If a boss does it with his secretary, she can file a sexual harassment case. If you do it with a girl at the mall, she could call security. A girl in the park could even call the police on her cell phone after you've flirted with her or tried to hit on her. Other guys I know have experienced all this.

It's not risk free. No way.

You are lucky that you're not a single guy in the US.
Check out the latest posts in our blog The Happier Abroaders.

Don't forget my HA Grand Ebook and Dating Sites!

"It takes far less effort to find and move to the society that has what you want than it does to try to reconstruct an existing society to match your standards." - Harry Browne, How I Found Freedom in an Unfree World
User avatar
Winston
Site Admin
 
Posts: 23596
Joined: Sat Aug 18, 2007 1:16 pm

Postby BellaRuth » Fri Jul 09, 2010 6:17 pm

Winston wrote:Hell ya! Flirting is dangerous in America. It can be seen as inappropriate easily. If a boss does it with his secretary, she can file a sexual harassment case. If you do it with a girl at the mall, she could call security. A girl in the park could even call the police on her cell phone after you've flirted with her or tried to hit on her. Other guys I know have experienced all this.

It's not risk free. No way.

You are lucky that you're not a single guy in the US.


Wow.

I hear of the occasional news story here of girls in London who dress in these tiny skirts for the office and sue for sexual harrassment if they get asked to change their clothing, but in everyday life flirting is pretty much a way of life from what I've seen. Even if people aren't interested in each other. It's just banter, friendly talk, a bit cheeky.

What would you need to do/say in order to cross the flirting line in America?
Toute connaissance est une réponse à une question. - Gaston Bachelard
BellaRuth
Freshman Poster
 
Posts: 231
Joined: Sat May 29, 2010 9:37 pm
Location: UK

Postby Adama » Fri Jul 09, 2010 6:50 pm

Fschmidt has a theory about this. It is divorce laws vs socialism.

In the USA, women are trained to hate men because that is an alternate means of support for them, after they declare independence in divorce. They will be rewarded handsomely with payments.

In Europe the laws are more balanced regarding divorce. Women cant financially rape men as easily. The women have socialism to take care of them, rather than generous property and child support settlements. So there is no constant need to war between the sexes. Women can get money without having to ruin men's lives.
User avatar
Adama
Elite Upper Class Poster
 
Posts: 3949
Joined: Sun Aug 23, 2009 9:37 pm

Postby Winston » Fri Jul 09, 2010 6:59 pm

BellaRuth wrote:
Winston wrote:Hell ya! Flirting is dangerous in America. It can be seen as inappropriate easily. If a boss does it with his secretary, she can file a sexual harassment case. If you do it with a girl at the mall, she could call security. A girl in the park could even call the police on her cell phone after you've flirted with her or tried to hit on her. Other guys I know have experienced all this.

It's not risk free. No way.

You are lucky that you're not a single guy in the US.


Wow.

I hear of the occasional news story here of girls in London who dress in these tiny skirts for the office and sue for sexual harrassment if they get asked to change their clothing, but in everyday life flirting is pretty much a way of life from what I've seen. Even if people aren't interested in each other. It's just banter, friendly talk, a bit cheeky.

What would you need to do/say in order to cross the flirting line in America?


Anything that's not business related can be construed as crossing the line. In general, you have to pretend that you have no desires.

Listen to these two interviews by Steve Hoca, and you will get an idea of what it's like for single men in America. But I warn you though, it's not pretty at all and will be very blood boiling:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kpjvs3oQvx0

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kiFnKfbtWOc
Check out the latest posts in our blog The Happier Abroaders.

Don't forget my HA Grand Ebook and Dating Sites!

"It takes far less effort to find and move to the society that has what you want than it does to try to reconstruct an existing society to match your standards." - Harry Browne, How I Found Freedom in an Unfree World
User avatar
Winston
Site Admin
 
Posts: 23596
Joined: Sat Aug 18, 2007 1:16 pm

Postby BellaRuth » Fri Jul 09, 2010 7:25 pm

Ok, my problem: I find it hard actually believing this is true (the interviews). A first I viewed it as a rant from disgruntled men who did have a valid point to make about social issues etc. But now I'm starting to think that what they say is actually literal, always?
Toute connaissance est une réponse à une question. - Gaston Bachelard
BellaRuth
Freshman Poster
 
Posts: 231
Joined: Sat May 29, 2010 9:37 pm
Location: UK

Postby Winston » Fri Jul 09, 2010 7:57 pm

BellaRuth wrote:Ok, my problem: I find it hard actually believing this is true (the interviews). A first I viewed it as a rant from disgruntled men who did have a valid point to make about social issues etc. But now I'm starting to think that what they say is actually literal, always?


Well it is a bit over the top yeah. But it is true for a lot of men and in a lot of cases, more than you might think and definitely more so than the media covers. Can't you tell the complete honesty and sincerity in their voices?

They may be extreme examples yeah. But a lot of guys do feel what they are saying, but afraid to admit it. It's a taboo forbidden truth. It's not true for everyone of course. Like everything, there are degrees of truth. And what they say does have truth in it, at least for some people and some cases.

The Chris interview is a bit more balanced, but the Scott interview is a lot more cynical no doubt.

But Bella, have you listened to the Steve/Steve interview yet that I just posted to my channel? That one is very accurate. I can personally vouch for it. Here it is: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YY3kDLNLRwI
Check out the latest posts in our blog The Happier Abroaders.

Don't forget my HA Grand Ebook and Dating Sites!

"It takes far less effort to find and move to the society that has what you want than it does to try to reconstruct an existing society to match your standards." - Harry Browne, How I Found Freedom in an Unfree World
User avatar
Winston
Site Admin
 
Posts: 23596
Joined: Sat Aug 18, 2007 1:16 pm

Postby rome86 » Sat Jul 10, 2010 6:45 pm

well I was more happy in a french culture .. the women are not perfect but they do not hate men, they respect men, love them you can flirt any woman without any hassle . I recently heard the story of three french who find the the so called dating scene in america very weird. What is Dating ? anyway .. people normally socialize show their emotions and that is it. In america you now have to go to bars and clubs to find women which is half true by the way. When I was 16, 17 , 18 getting women was fairly easy I just had to go to social events like party, movies, reunions and I would meet plenty of sexy gorgeous, APPROACHABLE women and just talk to them. Since I moved to the usa to study for 4 years ( i am now 24) getting women has been an uphill battle , now i need to create some sort of material value around me to attract, I need to register to bars and clubs... i can't talk to women cause of their force field, bubble crap around them... you know what I am not a conformist ... in december I'll be done with my bachelor and I am moving to quebec, i'll settle there, finish my studies and DATE QUEBECQUOISES ..America for me is for investment, business and work NO SOCIAL LIFE.

Rome 8)
hello
rome86
Freshman Poster
 
Posts: 194
Joined: Tue Mar 30, 2010 9:42 pm

Postby momopi » Sun Jul 11, 2010 3:18 pm

BellaRuth wrote:What would you need to do/say in order to cross the flirting line in America?


I worked in corporate America (fortune 500 companies) in US for ~15 years. At work we had sexual harassment / sensitivity training where you sit with your group and discuss what would be Green (acceptable), Yellow (caution), and Red (unacceptable). Common sense rules apply -- no means no. If she's not interested, suck it up like a man and beat it. Those rules were designed against losers who can't take no for an answer, or crazy stalkers. Other than that, our managers cared more about the dress code than obnoxious sausage jokes.

Because we were in the financial/securities industry, we had restrictions on couples working together in sensitive positions / security access. It discouraged dating at work somewhat but stilled happened, just because if you put single guys with single girls in close proximity they'd hook up. One of my coworkers got a girl at work pregnant with twins, the network guy was dating the receptionist, and his boss was married to a women at work (transferred to different group). I myself dated the daughter of one of the managers at work (her daughter was my classmate in college) plus a coworker from Singapore on rotation assignment. Word to the wise -- don't date girls at work if they're sitting next to you. If it doesn't work out, it's an awkward 6 months until her next rotation.

The company that I worked for that's most relaxed about dating at work was Southern California Gas Company. My manager specifically told me "we don't care". At least 2-3 guys in my group dated girls at work, one got a girl pregnant and married her. The company also had a lot of bored MILF's and I wouldn't be surprised if there were affairs going on, but since I wasn't union, I wasn't in the "in" crowd for gossips.
momopi
Elite Upper Class Poster
 
Posts: 4707
Joined: Sat Sep 01, 2007 4:44 am
Location: Orange County, California

Postby Winston » Wed Jul 14, 2010 5:06 pm

An interesting response I received to this:

"LOL in continuation of my previous reply to you,

The French were always looked at as rather naughty ever since WW I when the French Postcards were discovered by American doughboys. Whenever people described French girls it was with the context that they were "loose" and "easy" and of lower morals than the English and Americans were used to.

In colonization it is told that the English stayed apart from locals. Houses in West Africa still have "boys quarters" where blacks could live separate from their English overlords. In contrast the French always "intermarried" in every place they went regardless of race. Ask any woman in Ivory Coast and she will tell you she is not Ivorian, she is "French"!

It seems that the French and English ideas of social conduct are almost extreme opposites.

Do you know that Queen Vitoria was responsible for tablecloths? She though the tables should be "dressed" because the sight of the shaply legs of the Victorian furniture might incite boys to fits of unbridled lust! LOL

Andrew"
Check out the latest posts in our blog The Happier Abroaders.

Don't forget my HA Grand Ebook and Dating Sites!

"It takes far less effort to find and move to the society that has what you want than it does to try to reconstruct an existing society to match your standards." - Harry Browne, How I Found Freedom in an Unfree World
User avatar
Winston
Site Admin
 
Posts: 23596
Joined: Sat Aug 18, 2007 1:16 pm

Americans make jokes about sexless marriages?

Postby polya » Thu Jul 15, 2010 8:58 am

"Americans make jokes about sexless marriages? Here in UK we wouldn't, like the French. It would be a bit... hm. Like you are about to divorce and are stressed and coming out with way too much personal info. "

Like a free association test, the first thing that came to mind is Tricia Walsh Smith - see her rant about her "sexless marriage" & how she'll "take the house"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hx_WKxqQF2o

Although, she clearly is not a stable girl & her divorce did send her over the edge. So most British/American girls aren't like her (I hope). I'm a little off target, but I still can't believe how she went viral a couple of years ago.
"Woman is a violent and uncontrolled animal... If you allow them to achieve complete equality with men, do you think they will be easier to live with? Not at all. Once they have achieved equality, they will be your masters." Cato the Elder
polya
Junior Poster
 
Posts: 850
Joined: Wed Jan 09, 2008 7:21 am

Re: Americans make jokes about sexless marriages?

Postby BellaRuth » Thu Jul 15, 2010 9:06 am

polya wrote:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hx_WKxqQF2o

Although, she clearly is not a stable girl & her divorce did send her over the edge. So most British/American girls aren't like her (I hope). I'm a little off target, but I still can't believe how she went viral a couple of years ago.


I thought she was American at first until I realised she didn't have an accent. She's nuts, look at her eyes! :)

I've never heard once, nor can imagine, anyone joking about a sexless marriage, but obviously there's some people out there who go against the mould... To be fair, though, she is the one wanting it, not him! I got the impression it was the other way round in the US?

About the differences between French/English attitudes to sex, I think that only relates to a hundred years ago. I don't see any difference in that regard now. Our biggest difference is about food!
Toute connaissance est une réponse à une question. - Gaston Bachelard
BellaRuth
Freshman Poster
 
Posts: 231
Joined: Sat May 29, 2010 9:37 pm
Location: UK

Next

Return to Dating, Relationships, Foreign Women

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 2 guests