Is being alone the only way to true peace and freedom without interference?

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Winston
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Post by Winston »

jamesbond wrote:
Winston wrote:Question for you all:

When you go out to a restaurant or public place alone, and you see everyone else there in groups with other people, does that make you feel like a loser? Do you worry that others are wondering why you're alone there while everyone else is with others?
I used to eat out at restaurants by myself quite a bit years ago but not anymore. It made me feel like a loser because everyone else was with other people, I was the only one there by myself.

One time I went and saw a movie by myself and I will never do it again. Everyone in the movie theater had either their husband or wife with them or their boyfriend or girlfriend with them.

I won't even step into a bar or club myself, it's an intimidating environment going with your friends, going by yourself REALLY makes you feel like a loser! :shock:

Remember, at least here in America, going to public places by yourself makes you look like a loser in the eyes of others. Women in America REALLY place a high emphasis on whether or not a guy is with his friends or by himself.
LOL then what do you do if you are out and alone and hungry? Do you just starve? Or do you go to the Taco Bell drive thru? lol

What if you don't like to cook? Do you just microwave a TV dinner? lol

I think if you go to a restaurant during lunch time it won't look as bad because it'll look like you are on a lunch break, and plus there's not as many people around.

Also, it depends on what kind of a restaurant. If you go to a place like Denny's alone, it's probably no big deal, since a lot of truck drivers eat there alone at the counter. Plus Denny's is full of older folks. It's not a cool place that young people hang out at. Same with diners in general. They usually have a counter for people eating by themselves. But a hip cafe or restaurant is another matter.

If you go to the movies during early afternoon, you won't feel as much of a loser either, since there won't be many people in the theater. I've gone to the movies at 1pm and been the only one in the entire theater. If you go at 11am, you will likely be the only one in the theater too. It'll make you feel like a VIP. lol
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Post by Winston »

Check this out. Would any of you dare try this? lol

http://www.davidicke.com/forum/showpost ... stcount=52

Yes you have to be alone because we are all competing for energy and there are takers and givers and it is easy to be drained by the psychic links with other people that are established via the chakra system. Alloya wrote a good article about living without these and shaking off the energy vampires...

http://www.alloya.com/texts/Living%20wi ... 0Pipes.pdf

And Svarga, who was a member of this site for a little while, wrote this great piece that I will put in full because it is so good -

The Real Armageddon: Learning how to be Alone!

"You have to do this alone! If you want to liberate yourself from the trap of the temporal illusory hologram, you have to learn how to be alone. When I say alone – I mean literally, absolutely, physically and mentally alone.

Here’s the eternal Secret of the Ages:

For at the very least 3 days isolate yourself, preferably in Nature. For 3 days remain totally alone – no people, no family, no lovers, no close friends, no drugs or alcohol, no meat, no telephone calls, NO TV!, no radio, no internet or computer, no newspapers or magazines, etc. Unplug!

For 3 days stay alone! Teach yourself to withdraw your energy from the external illusory reality and detach your consciousness from the five senses. Remain in meditation for as long as you possible can.

Get ready for the Battle of your Life! This is the real Armageddon – the one that rages within! Your GUNAS are going to do everything they can to hold on to you. Remember that everything is God/IS-ness and therefore the GUNAS themselves are also God. In fact IS-ness created the GUNAS to bind ITSELF within the illusion of this polarity based hologram. Ask the God-within you for help, for GRACE.

Your stubborn persistence in the face of an all out assault by the five senses will be living proof to the God-within you that you are ready for GRACE, ready to move beyond the bonds of the illusion. If you feel or see demons or other unpleasant energies, brush them away as illusions – that’s all they are!

You will be amazed at how desperate you become to feed the small identity-self’s ego. A zillion thoughts will trample through your brain urging you back to your habitual compulsions. This will be the moment you begin to learn something about yourself – this will be the real test of your courage. Nothing you have ever done in your life will be as difficult as this process of learning to be alone. Nothing can really prepare you except an unquenchable desire for the Truth and for Liberation (JIVAN MUKTI) from Illusion. Truly you must want this more than ANYTHING else.

When you are at your wits end, and you will be, you can use inspiring music – music that is uplifting and has a higher consciousness, music without words to stick in your head. I recommend Mozart, Chopin, and Indian RAGAS, whatever resonates with your own being. Learn to listen to sound as waveforms, sound as singular tones of a specific frequency. Float in water in the dark, go for walks alone and look up at the sky, follow the night’s gentle shadows and watch the stars move across the heavens, smell the cedar & pine trees, stretch your weary body out on the earth, hold the dirt in your hands. And you sing! Use tones to focus. OM is excellent. Experiment – the God-within will guide you.

Take with you the Bhagavad Gita, the original writings of Lao Tzu, or the work of the Sufi poet Rumi – or all three. When your noisy mind is harassing you with torrential nonsense, read these works over and over. They have a frequency of higher consciousness and will lift you into truth even if you don’t yet understand them. I have been reading the Bhagavad Gita for 30 years now and I am only just beginning to understand its timelessly profound meaning.

Unless you were born enlightened – and then you probably wouldn’t be reading this – it is almost impossible for anyone to begin to access their inner-world surrounded by the constant distraction of other human beings.

Every day in every moment you are being bombarded by the GUNAS as waveforms emitted from the temporal illusory holograms of everyone around you. The small personality selves of the people you know and love, or hate, are incessantly mixing with your own – until most of us have no idea where our thoughts come from, meaning we don’t know if a thought is our own or coming from someone else.

This includes the media in a monster way! These machines possess the power to emit waveforms that permeate your consciousness. Therefore it is crucial to unplug these frequency emitters in order to establish a tender subtle connection to your own Within. Especially the TV - and after you become more sensitive, you will realize that your television emits a waveform that effectively entrains you into a specific state of consciousness – more a state of unconsciousness, I would say, designed to leave you feeling insecure, mildly fearful, and ready to go out and buy things you don’t need to pad your comfort zone.

You will not have to become a hermit forever, just now and then. I realize that many of you have families, beloved ones, and adored children. But if you really want to give the ones you love something that is truly valuable, something that will endure, something eternal - then give them your higher consciousness!

Learning to be alone will at first seem like the worst poison, but after a time it will turn into the sweetest Divine Nectar you ever tasted.

Krishna in the Bhagavad Gita:

“…at first seems like poison but as it matures is like Elixir, the happiness which springs from the serenity of one’s own Spirit.â€￾ 40[18].37
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Post by Winston »

I've concluded this:

Most people are assholes, including some on this forum. They disturb your peace of mind. They drain your energy, bring you down, judge you, criticize you, cause conflict, etc. Why bother with them? All they do is cause conflict and trouble. It's better to limit or sever your contact with them. It's insane to continue to tolerate it and be dragged down into other people's insanity.
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Post by Taco »

Winston wrote:I've concluded this:

Most people are assholes, including some on this forum. They disturb your peace of mind. They drain your energy, bring you down, judge you, criticize you, cause conflict, etc. Why bother with them? All they do is cause conflict and trouble. It's better to limit or sever your contact with them. It's insane to continue to tolerate it and be dragged down into other people's insanity.
I agree. Actually, most of my best friends are dogs. My Filipina is very supportitive also, I don't have to do anything to make her happy, she has no expectations and she never gets mad at me.
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Being alone is my preference...

Post by chaste_filipina »

I treasure my moments of being alone. Although some friends of mine could never understand why I behave like that but I prefer being alone than to be in a crowd of people who are shallow and full of nonsense. In your lifetime, you will meet very difficult people whom you will surely think I must avoid interacting with this "kind" of person. But the world is fair, you cannot choose the people who will come into your life and touch your life with their presence (whether it is positive or negative), who will one day walk away from you, and who will choose to stay with you as true best friends for a lifetime. With patience and understanding, you must learn the ability to love the unlovable person unconditionally.
If I have not learned that ability, I will become a person who hates humanity.

However, Winston you can choose which things to affect you. You can choose to forget their wrongdoing and just forgive the person wholeheartedly. If not, your traumatic past will forever haunt you.
Learning to overcome such fears in life is a challenge worth risking your life.

Then again, I prefer being alone. The time spent being alone is special. Take your time learning yourself. Besides, each of us has its own battle with ourselves. Other people can enrich us yet it is up to us to enhance whatever enrichment we receive from interacting with other people.

It helps to be the spectator in a story. :P
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Re: Is being alone the only way to true peace? Deep questions

Post by Winston »

Some great quotes about loneliness and being alone.

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"Loneliness is a barrier that prevents one from uniting with the inner self" - Carl Rogers

"Loneliness is dangerous and addicting. Once you see how peaceful it is, you don't want to deal with people anymore."

"Don't be afraid of being outnumbered. Eagles fly alone. Pigeons flock together."

"I used to think that the worst thing in life was being alone. It's not. The worst thing in life is to end up with people that make you feel alone." - Robin Williams

"Loneliness does not come from having no people about one, but from being unable to communicate the things that seem important to oneself, or from holding certain views which others find inadmissible." - Carl Jung
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Re: Is being alone the only way to true peace? Deep questions

Post by Winston »

"It´s beautiful to be alone. To be alone does not mean to be lonely. It means the mind is not influenced and contaminated by society" - Jiddu Krishnamurti

How to enjoy being alone

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Re: Is being alone the only way to true peace? Deep questions

Post by Zambales »

I spent 30 years living with the uninspiring influences of family and women.

By being alone I was in control of my life at last and realised how unfortunate I once was.
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Re: Is being alone the only way to true peace? Deep questions

Post by Moretorque »

Being alone the way things are today for most is more than likely the most peaceful option..
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Re: Is being alone the only way to true peace and freedom without interference?

Post by Winston »

Solitude and Self-Realization: Why You Should Spend More Time Alone

“Be alone, that is the secret of invention; be alone, that is when ideas are born.”
― Nikola Tesla

“Be a loner. That gives you time to wonder, to search for the truth. Have holy curiosity. Make your life worth living."
― Einstein



This video preaches a HA theme too, when it says that if your social world is a bad influence, then you should find a new social world that's better.
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Re: Is being alone the only way to true peace and freedom without interference?

Post by Winston »

Interesting book.

https://psycnet.apa.org/record/2005-11953-000

Citation
Storr, A. (1988). Solitude: A return to the self. Free Press.

Abstract
This book challenges the established belief that "interpersonal relationships of an intimate kind are the chief, if not the only, source of human happiness." Indeed, most self-help literature still places relationships at the center of human existence. Storr's book cites numerous examples of brilliant scholars and artists--from Beethoven and Kant to Anne Sexton and Beatrix Potter--to demonstrate that solitude ranks alongside relationships in its impact on an individual's well-being and productivity, as well as on society's progress and health. But solitary activity is essential not only for geniuses, says Storr; the average person, too, is enriched by spending time alone. (PsycINFO Database Record (c) 2016 APA, all rights reserved)

https://www.amazon.com/Solitude-Return- ... B00X4115XI

Solitude a Return to the Self

Originally published in 1988, Anthony Storr's bestselling meditation on the creative individual's need for solitude has become a classic.

A pre-eminent work in self-help and popular psychology literature, Solitude was seminal in challenging the psychological paradigm that “interpersonal relationships of an intimate kind are the chief, if not the only, source of human happiness.” Indeed, most self-help literature still places relationships at the center of human existence. Lucid and lyrical, Storr's book argues that solitude ranks alongside relationships in its impact on an individual’s well-being and productivity, as well as on society's progress and health. Citing numerous examples of brilliant scholars and artists—from Beethoven and Kant to Anne Sexton and Beatrix Potter—he argues that solitary activity is essential not only for geniuses, but often for the average person as well. For nearly three decades, readers have found inspiration and renewal in Storr's erudite, compassionate vision of the human experience—and the benefits and joy of solitude.
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Re: Is being alone the only way to true peace and freedom without interference?

Post by Winston »

Great video title. So true about how other people bring us down.

How to Overcome the Downward Pull of Other People



https://academyofideas.com/2019/04/over ... er-people/

“Interactions with people are the major source of emotional turmoil, but it doesn’t have to be that way. The problem is that we are continually judging people, wishing they were something that they are not… We want them to think and act a certain way, most often the way we think and act. And because this is not possible, because everyone is different, we are continually frustrated and upset. Instead, see other people as phenomena, as neutral as comets or plants. They simply exist. . . Work with what they give you, instead of resisting and trying to change them. Make understanding people a fun game, the solving of puzzles. It is all part of the human comedy.”

- Robert Greene, The Laws of Human Nature
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Re: Is being alone the only way to true peace and freedom without interference?

Post by Winston »

7 badass traits of people who like being alone.

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Re: Is being alone the only way to true peace and freedom without interference?

Post by Winston »

Great quote. So true.

"A wise man can always be found alone. A weak man can always be found in a crowd." - Bruce Lee

"Care about what other people think, and you will always be their prisoner." - Lao Tzu
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Re: Is being alone the only way to true peace and freedom without interference?

Post by Winston »

How to Transform Yourself in Solitude | Useful Ways to Spend Time Alone



Stoicism for Inner Peace (book): https://einzelganger.co/innerpeace
The Kindle version will be available for $0.99 until April 21st!

Hermits, regardless of why they’ve chosen their lifestyles, may have closed themselves off from one world; they’ve gained another: a world that’s potentially much deeper and fulfilling. It’s no surprise that hermits have appeared in many cultures in human history. Another example are the Christian desert mothers like Syncletica of Alexandria who abandoned the city and spent the rest of her life in a crypt. Or Hindu philosopher Ramana Maharshi who meditated for many years at a temple, and Rabbi Yosef Yozel Horowitz who spent years of his life in seclusion.

But even though a stronger connection with God and the prospect of enlightenment are the grounds on which these hermits secluded themselves; there’s also a more mundane reason why spending time alone can be beneficial: it’s an opportunity for self-transformation.
Being alone can be a transformative experience if we utilize it correctly; which is backed up by numerous accounts in the field of psychology (see links in the description) as well as philosophy and spiritual teachings like Buddhism.

Now, this video doesn’t recommend becoming a hermit nor socially isolated in ways that are unhealthy and destructive, or gives any ‘advice’ for that matter. Solitude is a tool, which can be used for good and bad, in moderation and excess, and this video explores the benefits that solitude can have. The information presented to you is mainly based on the author’s reasoning and observations, supported by different sources. Video: How to transform yourself in solitude, and useful ways to spend time alone.
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