Christmas gift exchanges - pointless and troublesome?
Christmas gift exchanges - pointless and troublesome?
Do any of you think that Christmas gift exchanges are pointless and troublesome? I know when you're a kid, it's like the highlight of your life, but now that you are a practical rational adult, doesn't it seem more trouble than it's worth - just to follow some dumb tradition everyone else is following, that was obviously created for commercial purposes?
I mean, you go out and spend hundreds of dollars on gifts, and others do the same for you. And then when you get your gifts, they may not even be what you want or need, so you end up having to find a place in your home to put them. Isn't that dumb? I mean, if you needed something, you'd go out and buy it yourself right? Why play this guessing game of exchanging gifts, just to end up with useless junk that you don't need with no place to put it? lol
Yet because everyone's family and friends are doing it, they feel obligated to submit to the pressure to do the same, even though deep down they probably don't want to. It's like that every year. Why doesn't someone break the cycle?
Christmas is overrated anyway. Most family gatherings (especially in the US) are composed of people who don't even really care about each other, acting polite just for the sake of the holiday season. It's so fake.
Have any of your families broken the chain and decided not to exchange gifts with others? Isn't it a waste of time and money, and unnecessary and troublesome as well?
My parents used to exchange gifts with others a few times back in the 80's, but eventually they and their friends and relatives realized it was pointless and stopped. My dad always said every Christmas: "If my friends get me a Christmas gift, then I have to go out and get them one too. What a hassle! That's why we don't do that anymore."
I think when you have little kids, the gifts thing is a huge thing to them, so the parents agree to it for their sake. But once the kids are grown up, then the whole thing is no longer necessary. Gifts don't bring joy to adults. They only bring joy to the pocketbooks of those producing and selling them commercially.
I mean, you go out and spend hundreds of dollars on gifts, and others do the same for you. And then when you get your gifts, they may not even be what you want or need, so you end up having to find a place in your home to put them. Isn't that dumb? I mean, if you needed something, you'd go out and buy it yourself right? Why play this guessing game of exchanging gifts, just to end up with useless junk that you don't need with no place to put it? lol
Yet because everyone's family and friends are doing it, they feel obligated to submit to the pressure to do the same, even though deep down they probably don't want to. It's like that every year. Why doesn't someone break the cycle?
Christmas is overrated anyway. Most family gatherings (especially in the US) are composed of people who don't even really care about each other, acting polite just for the sake of the holiday season. It's so fake.
Have any of your families broken the chain and decided not to exchange gifts with others? Isn't it a waste of time and money, and unnecessary and troublesome as well?
My parents used to exchange gifts with others a few times back in the 80's, but eventually they and their friends and relatives realized it was pointless and stopped. My dad always said every Christmas: "If my friends get me a Christmas gift, then I have to go out and get them one too. What a hassle! That's why we don't do that anymore."
I think when you have little kids, the gifts thing is a huge thing to them, so the parents agree to it for their sake. But once the kids are grown up, then the whole thing is no longer necessary. Gifts don't bring joy to adults. They only bring joy to the pocketbooks of those producing and selling them commercially.
Last edited by Winston on December 22nd, 2011, 10:36 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Very well said Winston! I stopped giving presents about 5 years ago, and gave money. Now I have said no presents or money from me, nor will I accept any. Christmas is just one big commercial nonsense and I won't have any part of it. The highlight of christmas for me is making lots of $$$ at the store I work at, seeing my family and eating the turkey skin!
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Re: Christmas gift exchanges - pointless and troublesome?
Winston wrote: I mean, you go out and spend hundreds of dollars on gifts, and others do the same for you. And then when you get your gifts, they may not even be what you want or need, so you end up having to find a place in your home to put them. Isn't that dumb? I mean, if you needed something, you'd go out and buy it yourself right? Why play this guessing game of exchanging gifts, just to end up with useless junk that you don't need with no place to put it? lol
I'm guilty of shopping for Xmas/Bday/CNY gifts from an ATM (hongbao). Back when my cousins were younger and silver was cheaper, I'd buy them silver eagles. But it's way too over-priced now.
Last edited by momopi on December 22nd, 2011, 7:30 pm, edited 1 time in total.
I was going to start similar topic. I absolutely agree! Christmas in Russia/FSU is seen as a family holiday, where everyone gets around the table to eat traditional "cooked from scratch" meals, go to church and just connect with all kids, relatives and family. Gifts are given constantly in FSU/Eastern Europe, no need to wait for a Christmas. Western style shopping madness is now present over there as well, which I am not happy about. However, people in Russia/FSU/Eastern Europe are more poor or just don't have credit cards, so it is hard for many to afford certain items. Therefore, gifts make sense over there because people will actually use them. What do spoiled over-consumed Americans really need? NOTHING! I absolutely guarantee it!
I stopped shopping for Christmas and asked everyone to stop giving me gifts. First of all, I HAVE EVERYTHING I NEED! Really. I do have great clothes, latest iPod etc. I am able to buy those myself. Second, why do people spend so much during Christmas and stand in lines? Why not just make a barbecue or spend time with a family playing pool or just watching a movie or whatever? I look at these people overcrowding malls and they make me want to throw up! They rush somewhere to get "awesome deals", why? Do you really need another iPod? I waited 5 years to get a new one, my old one is not working well anymore, that's the only reason why I got a new one recently. I have never owned an iPhone, why would I? Internet is everywhere in America, but yet people spend $120 bucks per month on cell phone bill in order to always be online and to totally isolate themselves from outside world by spending hours on Facebook or texting totally random crap to their friends. PEOPLE NEED TO GET A LIFE!
I stopped shopping for Christmas and asked everyone to stop giving me gifts. First of all, I HAVE EVERYTHING I NEED! Really. I do have great clothes, latest iPod etc. I am able to buy those myself. Second, why do people spend so much during Christmas and stand in lines? Why not just make a barbecue or spend time with a family playing pool or just watching a movie or whatever? I look at these people overcrowding malls and they make me want to throw up! They rush somewhere to get "awesome deals", why? Do you really need another iPod? I waited 5 years to get a new one, my old one is not working well anymore, that's the only reason why I got a new one recently. I have never owned an iPhone, why would I? Internet is everywhere in America, but yet people spend $120 bucks per month on cell phone bill in order to always be online and to totally isolate themselves from outside world by spending hours on Facebook or texting totally random crap to their friends. PEOPLE NEED TO GET A LIFE!
Winston,
Agreed. I thought something was askew about Christmas one year when I gave my brother-in-law a $50 gift card to Best Buy and got the same thing back from him. I've given up the spending $500-1000 on gifts for Christmas buying cheap junk or gift cards and just focused on the holiday. I don't expect to receive any gifts either. Now, I make my own cards and send those out to all the people I care about and if I can find something unique that I think people will like, I will get everyone the same thing. Next year will probably be a photo album of some sort with photos I've taken. You can't buy it in a store, and it's a means of giving of myself. What's funny is I think most people connect with that more than the gift cards. If somebody really wants something these days they usually go buy it themselves anyway.
Agreed. I thought something was askew about Christmas one year when I gave my brother-in-law a $50 gift card to Best Buy and got the same thing back from him. I've given up the spending $500-1000 on gifts for Christmas buying cheap junk or gift cards and just focused on the holiday. I don't expect to receive any gifts either. Now, I make my own cards and send those out to all the people I care about and if I can find something unique that I think people will like, I will get everyone the same thing. Next year will probably be a photo album of some sort with photos I've taken. You can't buy it in a store, and it's a means of giving of myself. What's funny is I think most people connect with that more than the gift cards. If somebody really wants something these days they usually go buy it themselves anyway.
Momopi, do you mean you give out Chinese New Year red envelopes with cash in them for Christmas?! Why? lol
My dad always said every Christmas: "If my friends get me a Christmas gift, then I have to go out and get them one too. What a hassle! That's why we don't do that anymore."
My dad always said every Christmas: "If my friends get me a Christmas gift, then I have to go out and get them one too. What a hassle! That's why we don't do that anymore."
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It's easier than to try and figure out what to buy for people. Just give them some cash and let them figure it out.Winston wrote:Momopi, do you mean you give out Chinese New Year red envelopes with cash in them for Christmas?! Why? lol
My dad always said every Christmas: "If my friends get me a Christmas gift, then I have to go out and get them one too. What a hassle! That's why we don't do that anymore."
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The trick is to only give gifts that have sentimental value or something you personally created and expect nothing in return. As one of the buddhists mantras says you give to others without thinking about the giving. This way it has some meaning and you're not just exchanging $ valued material goods. I found a long out of print novel for a friend of mine (searched high and low on ebay for months) and the genuine happiness that gift brought was worth the hassle in finding it.
Isn't giving cash kind of tacky? Why not just get them a gift certificate at a hip store?momopi wrote:It's easier than to try and figure out what to buy for people. Just give them some cash and let them figure it out.Winston wrote:Momopi, do you mean you give out Chinese New Year red envelopes with cash in them for Christmas?! Why? lol
My dad always said every Christmas: "If my friends get me a Christmas gift, then I have to go out and get them one too. What a hassle! That's why we don't do that anymore."
Or not participate in the gift exchange at all? lol
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You're not off base on this, Winston. Christmas has become so commercialized that it's satisfying in a narrower way. What I don't understand is that people are so rude and standoffish with total disregard for others when shopping yet fake courtesy and sincerity prevail in non-commercial places. You can tell if someone is acting nice rather than just being nice if you know that person is not that way ther other 11 months of the year. You can also sense it in their tone of voice. Too many people become engulfed in the Holiday frenzy that they get their priorities mixed up and lose sight of what is important. A few years ago I simply lost interest in gifts and valued time with friends a family more. I have given up on Christmas shopping as venturing out "into the wild" is ridiculous and unnecessary.
This year is no different. My family and close friends share the same mindset. I don't even participate in office Christmas parties or gift exchanges. With some troublesome colleagues and issues that the department has to deal with, I'm supposed to forget about all of that for a month and mask my contempt by pretending everything is fine and dandy? No thanks. I'm not interested in being artificial or being judged solely by the gifts that I buy. It is commonly known that the holiday season is a time for giving and being nice towards one another. That is such fecal propaganda as is the lame excuse for a holiday better know as Valentine's Day. Such moods and actions should not be reserved for a certain day or time of year. If one wants to give gifts to someone they care about then they should not be limited to Christmas and birthdays. If they want to express their love to a special person then what is wrong with the other 364 days of the year that has to make a day in February so busy?
This Christmas I am simply looking forward to spending time with those that I care about. To me that is the greatest gift of all.
This year is no different. My family and close friends share the same mindset. I don't even participate in office Christmas parties or gift exchanges. With some troublesome colleagues and issues that the department has to deal with, I'm supposed to forget about all of that for a month and mask my contempt by pretending everything is fine and dandy? No thanks. I'm not interested in being artificial or being judged solely by the gifts that I buy. It is commonly known that the holiday season is a time for giving and being nice towards one another. That is such fecal propaganda as is the lame excuse for a holiday better know as Valentine's Day. Such moods and actions should not be reserved for a certain day or time of year. If one wants to give gifts to someone they care about then they should not be limited to Christmas and birthdays. If they want to express their love to a special person then what is wrong with the other 364 days of the year that has to make a day in February so busy?
This Christmas I am simply looking forward to spending time with those that I care about. To me that is the greatest gift of all.
Taco wrote:Filipinas are pretty easy to please as far as christmas gifts go. My filipina wants me to dress up as Santa and then f**k the hell out of me under the christmas tree, I was trying not to laugh when she told me that today.
And who says Christmas is boring in the Philippines! LOL
outwest
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Re: Christmas gift exchanges - pointless and troublesome?
I admit, I relish Christmas. I love receiving gifts and I love giving gifts. There are Christmas gifts that I actually use and need. For example, one of my relatives could get me boxers for Christmas. I may need more boxers so I will not run out. I am going to answer your inquiries.Winston wrote:Do any of you think that Christmas gift exchanges are pointless and troublesome? I know when you're a kid, it's like the highlight of your life, but now that you are a practical rational adult, doesn't it seem more trouble than it's worth - just to follow some dumb tradition everyone else is following, that was obviously created for commercial purposes?
I mean, you go out and spend hundreds of dollars on gifts, and others do the same for you. And then when you get your gifts, they may not even be what you want or need, so you end up having to find a place in your home to put them. Isn't that dumb? I mean, if you needed something, you'd go out and buy it yourself right? Why play this guessing game of exchanging gifts, just to end up with useless junk that you don't need with no place to put it? lol
Yet because everyone's family and friends are doing it, they feel obligated to submit to the pressure to do the same, even though deep down they probably don't want to. It's like that every year. Why doesn't someone break the cycle?
Christmas is overrated anyway. Most family gatherings (especially in the US) are composed of people who don't even really care about each other, acting polite just for the sake of the holiday season. It's so fake.
Have any of your families broken the chain and decided not to exchange gifts with others? Isn't it a waste of time and money, and unnecessary and troublesome as well?
My parents used to exchange gifts with others a few times back in the 80's, but eventually they and their friends and relatives realized it was pointless and stopped. My dad always said every Christmas: "If my friends get me a Christmas gift, then I have to go out and get them one too. What a hassle! That's why we don't do that anymore."
I think when you have little kids, the gifts thing is a huge thing to them, so the parents agree to it for their sake. But once the kids are grown up, then the whole thing is no longer necessary. Gifts don't bring joy to adults. They only bring joy to the pocketbooks of those producing and selling them commercially.
I do not think that exchanging Christmas gifts are pointless and troublesome. I usually have enough money after Christmas is over and I love giving presents. The feeling of giving Christmas presents is a wonderful feeling. I do not think it is trouble to follow a tradition.
I do not think it is dumb when someone gets me a gift I do not need. I concur that if you need something you could get it yourself. Sometimes, your friends and/or relatives get what you need for Christmas. For example, I may get boots and a huge jacket for Christmas because I am going to a cold country to study abroad. The reason why people play this guessing game of Christmas is because that can happen during Christmas. Sometimes, it happens to all of us. It happened to me before.
People may not break the cycle because family members give presents to their families that they need. Everybody needs something for Christmas. Some people need money, some people need clothes, some people need food, some people need a new game system, and etcetera. There are toy drives and other things to give children and other people things they want and/or need. That is cool because in my opinion, everyone deserves something for Christmas.
People getting Christmas gifts for people is not a waste of time and money, and unnecessary and troublesome if those individuals use it and need it. However, it could be a waste of time and money, and unnecessary and troublesome if those individuals did not use it.
I concur with a few of your points.
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No matter how good she looks, some other guy is sick and tired of putting up with her crap. ~Author Unknown (Quote about women)
Well LOL a hot humid Christmas is not exactly ideal. LOLOutWest wrote:Taco wrote:Filipinas are pretty easy to please as far as christmas gifts go. My filipina wants me to dress up as Santa and then f**k the hell out of me under the christmas tree, I was trying not to laugh when she told me that today.
And who says Christmas is boring in the Philippines! LOL
outwest
Misamis Oriental, Mindanao
Besides, one of the annoyances in the Philippines is that during Christmas, the girls there see gift giving as a ONE WAY thing - you giving gifts to them, but they giving you nothing! It's very unfair and one-sided, and I don't think many Filipinas understand what a "gift exchange" is. lol
Just one of many annoyances in the Philippines, especially if you are a perfectionist. lol
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