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Vent your rants and raves here about whatever makes you mad, angry or frustrated.
My girlfriend is from Guanajuato state but from the city of Irapuato (which is industrialized, not cultural, boring). I met her through a female friend (also from Irapuato) whom I met at the beginning of this year via Facebook. She's predominantly European descent (and I can send you photos of her on PMs). And more importantly, she's very humble, feminine (yes, she even follows the traditional roles that women have always followed before feminism), and one of the most down-to-earth girls I've met. She doesn't go partying, doesn't go out with a bunch of other guys, or wear revealing clothing. Plus, my woman is an auxiliary nurse, which is a far better alternative to the backwards healthcare system we have in the U.S. Imagine having a girlfriend for healthcare .
Regarding the social scene in Guanajuato City, it's a university town like I mentioned. But a lot of the students are from other cities in Guanajuato state (e.g. Irapuato, León, Salamanca, Celaya, etc.), or nearby states (like Jalisco, Aguascalientes, Querétaro, or Michoacan). I haven't met many who grew up in Guanajuato City itself. So far I only met people in the centro de idiomas as I have been enrolled in Spanish classes.
Sometimes, I've been able to meet people and make friends at just random places like sitting in a bench in the plaza. In fact, back in February of last year, I dated a Michoacan girl in her early 20s (she's from La Piedad) whom I randomly met near Teatro Juarez and Jardín Unión. Then early this year, I befriended a woman in her late 40s, and we met near the basilica sitting in benches. Last but not least, I made friends with an early-20s Mexican man from a small town in Durango state when he was selling tickets for callejoneadas (nightly events in Guanajuato led by student musicians or mariachi bands).
Matt Hanson 1990,
Well it's great that you've found a girlfriend down here and happened to bypass the annoyances and inconveniences that I've noticed down here.
I guess the two main things that I've discovered to be problematic with regards to Mexican women are the following:
As I've said before, the women here seem to be influenced a great deal by whatever their peers do or how they behave. I've endured countless situations in which I'd be talking to a girl that really seemed to enjoy my company, but as soon as her friends came onto the scene, the interaction would rapidly deteriorate and the girl would suddenly turn on me and end up running off with them while leaving me out in the cold. Now these were people that didn't even know me or anything about me and I could understand something like that happening if one of her friends had happened to know something fateful or unflattering about my past, but no, these were just random people who didn't know me from Adam, and yes this has mostly occurred in nightclubs, but also on a few occasions outside of the club scene as well. My cousin told me that he was chatting up some girl from his class at the university (this was during the day not at a club) and as soon as her girlfriend joined in, she suddenly clammed up and started ignoring him and eventually ran off with her friend. Now I understand that when a girl is receiving unwanted attention that many times her friends will jump in to "save" the girl from the guy's incommoding presence, but supposedly this girl had enjoyed his company as well. Now mind you, I'm in my early 30s so I can perceive pretty well when somebody feels comfortable around me or not, so I've come to the conclusion that if you're not part of the girl's inner circle, you're pretty much f***ed socially, and I've noticed this amongst some of the more middle class girls as well.
Another problematic thing I've noticed is that many of the girls here hang around men that have this immature "macho" thing going on, i.e. men that get drunk and pick fights in order to flaunt their bravado. I've been reading some of Tapatio's posts about his commentaries pertaining to Latinos in general, and yes many of the men here do behave impulsively and irresponsibly and the girls just seem to put up with it and continue to hang around such characters despite the ominous risks that may ensue. Perhaps the women here just consider it to be part of the culture and therefore don't see any problem with such boisterous and reckless behavior, but personally I wouldn't want to associate with people that act in such an impetuous and heedless manner, because that to me would just yield trouble and trouble in a foreign country is definitely something you don't want (my cousin almost got arrested after some scuffle in Puebla instigated by the other party). Because think about it, a man that truly is masculine with things going for himself wouldn't need to act "macho". "Macho" to me is an indication of insecurity or some kind or inferiority complex and it's lamentable that the women here tolerate such nonsense. Maybe it has something to do with the emblematic mystique of the "bad boy" and these women feel that they can "cure" the guy via their devotion put please trouble is trouble and any intelligent person should know better.
But don't get me wrong, I generally do like Mexico as I'm 99.999% sure that my dating prospects wouldn't have been any better in the US, but after reading Winston's comparisons, I felt the need to comment as I initially believed that his perception of Mexico was a bit skewed as I've noticed that most of his travel experiences have been in Eastern Europe and Southeast Asia. Much of what he says with regards to the stronger family dynamic, lack of psychiatric drug usage, almost nonexistent bullying in the school systems here (I've never heard of a hazing incident here at a local university), virtually nonexistent random mass shootings (almost all of the violent crime involving firearms has to do with the cartels that don't normally harass Joe Blow citizens) more freedom to speak your mind about certain social issues ( I don't think people would blackball you down here if you spoke out against feminism, globalization, etc, like they would in the US), and more of an emphasis on personal enjoyment as opposed to consumerism and corporatism are indeed true, but what he says about the social environment being more "inclusive" and less "cliquish" and how girls don't worship "bad boys" abroad aren't necessarily true.
Glad to hear that you appear to be "Happier Abroad" on this southern side of the border. Just felt the need to add some more of my two cents.
Regarding the Mexican men, I've noticed that not only they like to get drunk and fight to show off their bravado, they also tend to be aggressive when courting women. For instance, at this one discoteca I went to last year, a girl was enjoying my company (I met her through other female friends); but a few minutes later a guy not in her social circle comes out of nowhere and asks her to dance with her. Since then, I stopped going to nightclubs. My girlfriend had a few Mexican ex-boyfriends who would ask to take her to a hotel for sex. But with all of them she said no to the offers. This is because she was brought up to save her virginity until marriage (she's still a virgin to this day). And then eventually, she began avoiding Mexican men like the plague and went three years without a boyfriend until I came along. All of her Mexican exes, she ended up only being with them for a week at most before leaving them.
I read posts from two other posters on this forum who also bypassed the inconveniences that you and your cousin encountered here and still scored dates with Mexican women. And the two are Falcon and AmericanInMexico. The former was in a committed relationship with a woman in rural Michoacan; the latter was engaged to a white Mexican girl in Hermosillo, Sonora (but not a fresa). I recommend you read their posts about their experiences in Mexico.
Exactly. You will have a hard time getting a stranger woman to talk to you randomly in public. And naturally even if they are flirting and willing to talk to you in public, they will ALWAYS claim to have a boyfriend.
That is because flirting is a sport for evil American women, and it is not really used to find a mate. They use it to boost their egos. As far as the evil American women are concerned, flirtation is the receipt of worship. Men hitting on them is men worshiping them. Men asking them out is men worshiping them.
And yes, they are exalted, which makes them cruel. They are energy vampires. That means they are really feeding off your soul. Drinking the water of life from your soul, gnashing upon your soul with their teeth. Your destruction uplifts them. Oppressing you uplifts them. Making things difficult for you, deceiving you, hurting your feelings, all these are literally the bread and butter for the souls of evil women. Your sorrow feeds their soul. Your frustration is their delight. Denying you gives them pleasure. Bossing you makes them feel good. They want to make you spin your wheels and then deny you the things that you want most.
I am not kidding. To the evil person, especially evil women, deception, trickery, malignity and sowing discord and all kinds of psychological cruelty bring delight to their souls and feed them.
This is because evil people are greedy for glory. They want to be the boss when they are not the boss. They want to destroy you though you've done nothing wrong and they will search diligently and/or make up flimsy reasons to destroy you. Or they'll just destroy you brazenly without cause. Because it is their joy. It feels good and it makes them feel like a god.
There is at least one man on here who says that I am slandering evil American women (this only applies to the evil ones, which may or may not be the VAST MAJORITY OF THEM) when I say they are exalted to godhood, but that is because he seriously lacks fundamental understanding. It is quite obvious that American women have GOD-STATUS. They are above men. That alone makes them gods, because the only person who is above man is God Himself. Women are not equal to or greater than men.
So when women are exalted, they aren't equal to men. Rather they are above men and therefore have taken God's place, which has destroyed them and turned them into destroyers themselves. And their goal is to turn men into the women: to make men submissive to women and make them fear what women can do to them, and then to destroy men.
It is the job of evil women to destroy your soul. They've already destroyed their own souls by taking the Satanic plan of destruction (as opposed to Christ's plan of salvation). That is, that they've committed themselves to working evil against others to exalt themselves (commit yourself to the full experience and knowledge of evil, and you will be like a god, and exalting women is evil). Because if a person is working evil, they have exalted themselves to godhood. Only God can destroy someone. Anyone who is evil has risen out of their place to play God to destroy life: with mischief and sorrow, cursing, bitterness and deception, with cruelty and wrath, with craftiness of the tongue, by withholding reciprocity, and by playing games with your mind, etc. These are all things that destroyers do to others to destroy them.
Unfortunately because the status of American women is exalted, it has really rendered the majority of them worthless as far as relationships are concerned, if you want tradition or you love peace and harmony.
Does this mean that people go around saying, "Look at American women. They are gods!" No. It means that whatever ruthless psychological and emotional torture women put a man through, because they possess uteri, where children come out from, they figure women are just and holy by default. There is no wrong a woman can do according to the soul -- psychologically or emotionally to another person because they are women. They are righteous by default. Their judgment is righteous by default. They are infallible, guiltless, spotless and blameless by default. They are above criticism by default (this is the blasphemy of misogyny). They are always right, by default.
If a woman committed evil, it must be that it was forced upon her. Or otherwise the evil deeds were justified.
Anyone with a mind capable of any understanding can see, that righteousness, perfect righteous judgment, and infallibility are all traits of only one being, and that is God. Yet many Americans really do believe that women inherently possess these traits (unless they are submissive and not American). By believing that women possess these characteristics and giving them passes, they've exalted women.
The USA is probably the worst matriarchy to ever have existed, and it came out from the Anglophone place known as Grosse Britania.
If the USA was a patriarchy like the feminists preach, then none of this would be spoken to men, ever. Every man would have access to women. But because this is a matriarchy, there is scarcity of good women.
Also in a matriarchy, men are shamed for being men, for natural male desires. And things which are not immoral and which directly delight men are deemed crimes.
This is a time of evil. It's an evil time in which women and children rule over men.
Matt Hanson 1990,
Wow, so what happened when this "macho" idiot came along to snatch your girl that night? Did she go along with it or did she tell him to buzz off? Yep, that has been a common scenario for me as well, although I think most of the time the people who ruined the interaction were probably from her own circle and I've also noticed that the girl just goes along with it as if she's one of those lemmings from that old video game I used to play as a kid that are mindlessly following one another without realizing the cliff looming ahead. Was this at a discotheque in Guanajuato City? Because here in MC, ugh, that type of behavior is rife and its so disappointing to be around women that are so sycophantic and easily influenced.
Yes, that does seem to be some other common BS that the local men pull here; i.e. asking the girl to go to some "love motel" so they can just brag about their conquests with their "cuates". Initially, I found the men here to be more gregarious as opposed to US men (or US people in general), but after awhile, I've begun to find the men here to be very immature, obtrusive, unintellectual, contentious, and quite pugilistic; pretty much what Tapatio said in his posts about Latinos in general. Now I'm not saying that I'm the "master" of sagaciousness, but I personally don't have anything in common with men like that or any type of pugnacious behavioral traits in general. Sure due to my Italian heritage I can be temperamental and perhaps at times aggressive, but I do have a sense of shame and respect for others that many here don't seem to have (i.e. what happened to you at the nightclub).
Ha yes, my cousin went to the University of Arizona and is quite familiar with Hermosillo and the State of Sonora. One of his best friends from college lives there but he told me that the city is kind of unattractive and that the climate is torrid (45C or 115F) during the summer (think El Paso TX although worse as I think that Hermosillo is lower in elevation as opposed to ELP), plus there aren't very many job opportunities there for foreigners although he told me that the women are quite beautiful and given that the city isn't as wealthy as the affluent conclaves in MC, perhaps there may be a better chance due to maybe less "fresa" BS.
That actually brings me to another question for you: Provided that you don't mind me asking you-what do you do for work in GTO? I'm asking you because as I've said in another post, I get the impression that cronyism is just through the roof here in Mexico, meaning that if you don't have strong local connections, outside of the ESL (teaching English as a second language) industry, you're f***ed with regards to a decent well-paying job unless a company from your home country happened to move you down here on a whim. I get the impression that most of the foreign employees that I've seen walking around in their suits along Paseo de la Reforma were business executives that happened to be transferred down here from whatever company they were working for in their home country. In other words, I don't think that they came down here without a job and said "hey here's my application, give me a shot" because like I said, I feel that if you were to do that, you'd get blown off as a local organization would much rather hire some Mexican with a local hookup opposed to a Joe Blow foreigner, even if you're a highly qualified person.
Your girlfriend sounds pretty cool. Pretty cool to find a girl nowadays that doesn't f*** around-she sounds like a keeper. I think after this year is over I might indeed check around GTO city, as the large concentration of transplants might reduce all of the social circle barriers that I've encountered in other places. In general I wouldn't recommend MC at all with regards to finding a girlfriend, perhaps a decent place for a vacation, but nothing more. Plus, the earthquake threat combined with the pervasive contentiousness furthermore makes MC an unattractive place to settle down in long term. A place that reeks of favoritism, corporate cronyism and pretentiousness combined with the threat of a building falling on your head just isn't my style.
Have fun with your girl! Curious to here what you have to say regarding employment down here.
No wonder why men are starting to avoid American women like the plague! The MGTOW movement is getting bigger every year in the US and it's no surprise why.
"When I think about the idea of getting involved with an American woman, I don't know if I should laugh .............. or vomit!"
"Trying to meet women in America is like trying to decipher Egyptian hieroglyphics."
She unfortunately went along with it.
Yep it was.
One time when I went to a cantina with a few Mexican male buddies, they showed me photos of hot women in very revealing clothing (those women were most likely escorts).
I haven't been to Hermosillo yet, but I would recommend it over CDMX, if not similar northern cities like Torreón or Chihuahua (the latter I recommend as I heard it's more cultural). Now how would your cousin describe Hermosillo vs. the wealthy cities in Bajío region - Aguascalientes, León, Querétaro - with regards to the fresa BS?
You said it about right on, Winston!
And there's even a vibe like approaching a woman is even a capital felony under Federal law in the United States. As in literally, you approach a woman, try to strike up a conversation with her, or talk to a stranger about something other than business, and you get arrested and charged with a capital felony that is heavily and thoroughly investigated by the FBI, the United States Department of Homeland Security, the United States Marshals, and carries a mandatory sentence of even 300 years to life in Federal prison and/or the death penalty, use of deadly force authorized.
It's like there are 10,000+ single guys to every ONE single woman! Literally just imagine, for instance, your favorite bartender saying she is single, and the next day there's a 1,000+ mile long line of single guys outside your favorite bar where she works, they show her pics of their expensive, souped up luxury sports cars and their huge McMansions with home movie theaters, tennis courts, 300 acres of land, and everything, she gets enough written phone numbers to fill the Louisiana Superdome to it's ceiling; even to where there's numbers sailing out of the dome's roof vents and all over Downtown New Orleans. And she goes right for the highest bidder.
Even if you are a hot guy, American women won't date you. Especially if you don't have;
-An expensive (half million dollars or more) souped up luxury sports car (especially a Ferrari or McLaren). Zero to 100 miles an hour in 3 seconds or less, top speed of 250 or faster, doors that raise up in the air, rear view cameras, velvet seats, and everything.
-A huge, giant luxury McMansion in a gated community, complete with a heated swimming pool, several hot tubs and Jacuzzis, a home movie theater, a cavernous foyer, a glass atrium, a huge aquarium, a miniature golf course, and about 50 acres of land.
-Luxury cabin cruiser half the size of an ocean liner. Gold and silver interiors, glass atriums, hot tubs, Jacuzzis, an aquarium, even a glass bottom, and capable of going around the world.
And not to mention American women, with their toxic personalities, apparently love going only for gang bangers and serial killers, guys with guns and firearms, guys who would blast another man through the skull for approaching within less than 100 feet of her.
American women are just like Veruca Salt in the 1971 movie "Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory." They expect the man to be Superman at keeping his job, keeping his income above 8 or 9 figures, and if she wants a bigger mansion with more of everything and you can not afford it, it's all over.
As for the walking on eggshells (actually, it's like walking on empty beer bottles), it even goes for friends, too. Once again, as stated, friendships in America are fake, superficial, and fleeting, really no more than just a façade. As in literally just a front wall. No roof, side walls, or rear wall at all, it's just the front wall built for show and display, and no protection at all from the elements. Speaking of bars, by the way, being a regular at a bar is a sure way to end up in monstrous trouble, even given a Trespass warning by the owner along with the local police. Just one mistake, one bad day, and you are immediately the most hated customer in the entire bar.
But it makes sense that a very "advanced" (or perhaps a better term would be "long established", since it goes all the way back to Britain) matriarchy would have more men than women, and that the women would be scarce, and that the value of women is very high.
That is because in a matriarchy women are supreme. They are the ones in charge (of their relationships and households). They are the valuable ones.
So society somehow gears itself toward women. It produces an excess supply of men for its women. It artificially inflates the status of its women.
It makes life especially difficult for men, and even convincing most men to enforce that limit upon themselves and other men using delusional beliefs and indoctrination.
In the USA if you're a broke father then prison may be coming. In their eyes you're a deadbeat dad (is that not misandry? What about deadbeat mom? And many other men will approve of you getting arrested for making a baby and not paying, but they don't hold those same opinions about women who don't pay or even women who are terrible mothers, because regardless what a woman does or is, it is the blasphemy of misogyny to speak against a woman unless she's an actual murderer ).
If you're a broke mom then a check comes, with some consoling pats on the back to remind you of how evil men (in the eyes of society) are and how special you are. Nobody is going to call you a deadbeat mom or a terrible wife for having left or driven off your man. Nobody is going to tell you that you were terrible at decision making or mate selection. Society is on YOUR side.
Just like when the cops are chasing a person and they're breaking laws. That's okay because they are hired by the state. Even though they are violating laws, they are exempt, because they are a part of the state.
The USA is the matriarchy of matriarchies: the Great Grand Mother that started it all and got the ball running, with their insistence that women deserve to vote. Now I am not saying that it even matters. I am saying that things like this deceive people into thinking that women are just the same as men if not better, when they were not meant to be in power, except over their own children.
Eve was also deceived by a lie that she too could be great. The lie is that you will not die if you pursue after the full knowledge and experience of evil, and you'll be like a god. What is being like a god? Exalting yourself out of your place. Exalting yourself out of your place is evil, and evil must be done against someone for you to be exalted.
So what are women doing by claiming to be equal or above men? They have been exalted out of their place, and for many if not most of them, they have been destroyed by this. Because anyone exalted is automatically abased if they don't belong there. Poor women don't even realize it, because they've been deceived by society and the fact that everyone else is doing it, and for many women, it is simply the greed and lust for power (over men) and glory. The only one above the man is Christ who is God. The woman cannot boss, disobey or sass the man. All such women are rebelling.
Matt Hanson 1990,
Sorry that you had a such a crummy experience out on the town that night, but at least you found somebody and didn't let that experience sour you. The only thing that I can surmise is that she was just the typical ingratiating attention whore type that'll use somebody for a quick ego boost and then once she gets her fix, she'll move on while leaving you in the dust. I certainly hope you didn't confront the guy that she went with, because another thing that I've noticed is that some of these embryonic women seem to get a kick out of watching men fight over them. I guess they feel "validated" knowing that men are competing and or duking it out for their attention, so hopefully you didn't fall into that trap. My cousin had a downright awful night at a place called Lola Lolita in GDL when he had endured a similar scenario, but unfortunately he lost his cool while confronting the girl and the guy and ended up getting thrown out via the use of force (he wasn't hurt) so it's best just not to react in situations like that.
In general, I noticed that the majority of foreigners living down here are either English teachers working for some incompetent and poorly organized language school or they're young Europeans drifting about while still being supported by their families, aside from the older Canadian and US expats that have retired here. It seems like getting a decent job here that pays well is very difficult without having the right local hookups unless a company from your home country happened to send you here. Even in QRO where a lot of foreign conglomerates have operations, it appeared as if the foreign employees working for those companies were sent to QRO from the US, Germany, East Asia, etc. I doubt that they had randomly traveled to QRO, submitted their resumes just for the heck of it and said " Hey I'm here, hire me!" I'm curious as to what this expat that you mentioned had to say regarding the employment dynamic here outside of the ESL industry. Why did he advise against having a Mexican bank account, and what does he do down here? I actually had a bank account with Bancomer when I used to work for a haphazardly run language school in San Luis Potosi which got cancelled due to inactivity (I hadn't used the account since I quit working there), but I think banks anywhere would do that if they're not accessed for a period of 6 months or perhaps I had owed them overwithdrawal fees after my last transaction (don't remember).
Yep, probably will check out GTO city this upcoming January. And yes another inconvenience regarding MC is that the cost of living can be high, unless you're willing to live in a marginal or outlining area that could be unsafe. Have you also noticed that many Mexicans automatically consider you to be wealthy if your light skinned? I've also met plenty of Mexicans that assume that I must've grown up in a luxurious place like Beverly Hills just because I have a "guero" skin tone and come from the US. Quite laughable because my grandparents actually grew up in Brooklyn after immigrating to the US from southern Italy when they were kids. Laughable indeed although quite painfully ignorant at the same time.
I never fell into the trap at all, as I am usually not an aggressive person. But I can assure you that attention whores are a HUGE problem these days, and is especially common among women who move out of their parents' homes while still single (e.g. for university or for work). And the university girls from Salamanca, León, and Irapuato live here and only go home for the weekends and vacations. I posted on another thread about how finding a woman with more traditional values in Latin America can take a lot of work, especially if you're in a country where promiscuity is more rampant like Colombia or Brazil. You need to speak good Spanish (or Portuguese if you're in Brazil), have a social circle, and you may need to go off the beaten path as well (i.e. going to smaller towns that haven't yet been affected by globalization). I know this from experience as well as reading about traditional culture dying on My Latin Life.
That same European man on the HA Facebook group (call him T) also told me that women who are easier to meet randomly are more likely to cheat on you.
The expat I met in GDL was a retiree from the states. He advised me against having a Mexican bank account because if you have one, your money won't be as secure as it would be in an American account. He didn't mention anything about employment outside of ESL, but I do know that minimum wage here is significantly less than in the U.S. That's why if you're a younger guy like me (especially if you couldn't get a foothold in life at home) and want to live in Mexico, it's best to have an online income. Otherwise, just go to Asia and teach English.