Why does America hate loners?

[Temprano26]

Every time I go out alone people look away from me as if I am not even there. Most people instead of talking to me would rather talk about me. Nobody smiles at me or looks me in the eye. It doesn't matter if I have no friends because I am out of town. It does not matter that I just go out cause I want to socialize. It doesn't matter that I feel alone. People just want no interaction with a loner. Then America wonders why a guy snaps and goes on a killing spree.

Do you feel alone in America too? How many people do you see solo at a public place? Does America ostracize you too for it?

[Winston]

Americans are always looking for reasons to judge others to make themselves feel superior. I don't see people alone in the suburbs. Usually it's only big cities that you see people alone cause they are on their way to somewhere. But you don't see people alone in restaurants or movie theaters except maybe during lunch on a weekday.

Going out is a very negative experience in America and Taiwan. You get this cold feeling like everyone hates you and wants to avoid you. So you in turn feel the same way toward them as well and can't wait to get home so you can not face people who dislike you. Any of you feel that way too?

It makes going out a very negative experience and one you want to avoid, which creates a vicious cycle because the more you don't go out, the more negative and depressed you get which only makes it worse.

It's very toxic and what's more, you don't get enough fresh air and physical activity from being inside all the time. Sitting too long on the couch or chair makes your mood feel depressed and deflated because your negative thoughts take over and your body doesn't generate energy from physical activity to uplift your mood. It's a very vicious cycle indeed.

Even though you know all this, you still can't help it. It's like there's no point in going out since the social vibe and people are very negative, uptight and paranoid. Every time you go out, you can't wait to get back home again to get away from such unfriendly people who dont like you and view you negatively. So there's no way to break out of this vicious cycle. Very sad huh?

[newlifeinphilippines]

yeah I hate going out alone in america. in fact thats why i never leave my house. I dont see the point of going places alone really. maybe once in awhile but im not in a habit of leaving my house for that reason.

Although i can feel the same way in philippines, i always felt weird when i was by myself as a foreigner like people were watching me.

[Winston]

yeah I hate going out alone in america. in fact thats why i never leave my house. I dont see the point of going places alone really. maybe once in awhile but im not in a habit of leaving my house for that reason.

Although i can feel the same way in philippines, i always felt weird when i was by myself as a foreigner like people were watching me.

I've gone out alone many times in the Philippines, even to restaurants and movie theaters. You do not get any judgemental stares or vibes there. That's the beauty of it. It's the most non-judgmental country there is.

Going out alone in america isn't just lonely, it's a negative experience as well because you feel this bad vibe from people like everyone dislikes you just cause you're a stranger. It's very toxic and depressing and makes you want to get home as soon as possible which makes you even more depressed cause you don't want to go out anymore. It's a vicious cycle that you can't break except by leaving the country or by making lots of cool friends which for us misfits and introverts is a fat chance.

[newlifeinphilippines]

yeah I hate going out alone in america. in fact thats why i never leave my house. I dont see the point of going places alone really. maybe once in awhile but im not in a habit of leaving my house for that reason.

Although i can feel the same way in philippines, i always felt weird when i was by myself as a foreigner like people were watching me.

I've gone out alone many times in the Philippines, even to restaurants aand movie theaters. You do not get any judgemental stares or vibes there. That's the beauty of it. It's the most non-judgmental country there is.

Going out alone in america isn't just lonely, it's a negative experience as well because you feel this bad vibe from people like everyone dislikes you just cause you're a stranger. It's very toxic and depressing and makes you want to get home as soon as possible which makes you even more depressed cause you don't want to go out anymore. It's a vicious cycle that you can't break except by leaving the country or by making lots of cool friends which for us misfits and introverts is a fat chance.

I agree that filipinos are less judgemental and its easier to be alone BUT i still hate going by myself even in philippines. An introverted/loner type is never gone be as comfortable by himself as if when he is with a woman going places. Also angeles city is not an accurate representation of philippines social structure for foreigners (even outside the girly bars).

[Bane]

I'm not really sure why there's such a stigma against going out alone…

I didn't find that to be the case when I was in East Asia, where lots of people are out alone. However, for some reason, it's different in the US. I could be completely wrong, but I think it comes down to the "time is money" mentality that Americans (and others increasingly) have. In big cities especially, it seems as though everyone is in such a hurry and rush to get to where they are going, nobody takes the time to stop and chat like they once did. Since everything is so fast paced, you have little time in which to impress people. If you can't impress people in short order, nobody will want to talk with you. Eventually, you end up alone, and when other people see you alone, they are creeped out by it, so they don't want to talk with you either. It becomes like a snowball effect. At least this is what I observe.

[Winston]

yeah I hate going out alone in america. in fact thats why i never leave my house. I dont see the point of going places alone really. maybe once in awhile but im not in a habit of leaving my house for that reason.

Although i can feel the same way in philippines, i always felt weird when i was by myself as a foreigner like people were watching me.

I've gone out alone many times in the Philippines, even to restaurants aand movie theaters. You do not get any judgemental stares or vibes there. That's the beauty of it. It's the most non-judgmental country there is.

Going out alone in america isn't just lonely, it's a negative experience as well because you feel this bad vibe from people like everyone dislikes you just cause you're a stranger. It's very toxic and depressing and makes you want to get home as soon as possible which makes you even more depressed cause you don't want to go out anymore. It's a vicious cycle that you can't break except by leaving the country or by making lots of cool friends which for us misfits and introverts is a fat chance.

I agree that filipinos are less judgemental and its easier to be alone BUT i still hate going by myself even in philippines. An introverted/loner type is never gone be as comfortable by himself as if when he is with a woman going places. Also angeles city is not an accurate representation of philippines social structure for foreigners (even outside the girly bars).

You miss my point. I'm not saying that going out alone is fun. But it feels comfortable because you don't feel like you're being judged negatively for it. The key thing is that you feel you can easily and naturally meet people while you are alone, whereas in the USA or Taiwan you do not and feel excluded. So you feel like the social doors are still open for you even if you are alone.

This is true in Southeast Asia, Latin America, Russia, Eastern Europe and Poland, in my experience.

[Banano]

Maybe in PH you just care less wht people think about you as you keep getting laid with chicks out of your league so it kinda gives you confidence,hence you care less.

In US you are not getting any attention from females and you prbbly jerking off to porn which is daily making you feel worthless, low life self concious loser.

Never underestimate what effects p***y has on your state of mind.

[starchild5]

man....The things that American men have to go through in their life's....I never ever thought in this way ever in India...These kinds of situations never presented itself to me....Reading the life's of American men...I feel, how lucky I was, even with all issues we have in India.

[newlifeinphilippines]

man....The things that American men have to go through in their life's....I never ever thought in this way ever in India...These kinds of situations never presented itself to me....Reading the life's of American men...I feel, how lucky I was, even with all issues we have in India.

but you even said that arranged marriages were usually only a guys hope? Seems rather rigid if the guy doesn't like his choices.

[Taco]

Loners are the opposite of douche bags, their quiet and they don't bother anyone. The problem is America puts douche bags on a pedestal and whorships them like their national hero's while men with normal personalities are ostracized.

[jamesbond]

Loners are the opposite of douche bags, their quiet and they don't bother anyone. The problem is America puts douche bags on a pedestal and whorships them like their national hero's while men with normal personalities are ostracized.

American women love guys who are douche bags. These guys are seen as confident and powerful but in reality they are obnoxious and arrogant.

[Wolfeye]

WTF? I tried posting on here yesterday & it didn't stay up. It seems to have happened before, too. What's the deal?

[Winston]

WTF? I tried posting on here yesterday & it didn't stay up. It seems to have happened before, too. What's the deal?

Did you see your post after it was posted? Or did you see a message at the top that said "At least one new post has been made to this topic. You may wish to review your post in light of this." If you saw that message, then you have to hit submit again to post your post. I know it's stupid and results in some people not seeing that message and assuming that their post was submitted when it wasn't. There was a way to turn that stupid feature off before but I can't find it anymore. I'll have to look on the support site to figure out how.

As I told you all before, running a multi-faceted website and dealing with computers and internet software applications involves dealing with thousands of issues like this, which is neverending no matter how many issues you resolve or how many years you work on it.

[Winston]

WTF? I tried posting on here yesterday & it didn't stay up. It seems to have happened before, too. What's the deal?

Did you see your post after it was posted? Or did you see a message at the top that said "At least one new post has been made to this topic. You may wish to review your post in light of this." If you saw that message, then you have to hit submit again to post your post. I know it's stupid and results in some people not seeing that message and assuming that their post was submitted when it wasn't. There was a way to turn that stupid feature off before but I can't find it anymore. I'll have to look on the support site to figure out how.

As I told you all before, running a multi-faceted website and dealing with computers and internet software applications involves dealing with thousands of issues like this, which is neverending no matter how many issues you resolve or how many years you work on it.

Ok I found out how to fix it, but I will have to edit the settings of each forum one at a time, which is tedious. But oh well. At least it's simple and repetitive. One more problem solved.