Why do women reject/dump Winston or lose their love for him?

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Winston
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Why do women reject/dump Winston or lose their love for him?

Post by Winston »

Why do women always tell me I'm not their type? Even if they like me at first or dig me in the beginning, they always change their mind and eventually say that. Is there something about my vibe that causes this? Is it cause I lack testosterone or masculinity? Something about me must be subliminally causing women to reject me. What is it?

Perhaps because I'm non-materialistic and live in the realm of imagination and out of touch with the materialistic practical world and don't fit into it, I give off a vibe that subliminally tells women that I am not a good provider?

They can never explain it. Yet they always give me that line that looks don't matter to them and that it's not me but them that's the problem, blah blah.

Why do women always lie and say that looks don't matter when we all know they do? Is there some mass collusion among women to always speak that lie? Most women I know, even in Asia, say that looks don't matter to them. But men are more honest and will admit that looks do matter in attraction. Yet the western media makes it appear that men lie more than women do. Go figure.

Also why does every guy, including my friends, claim that they never get dumped and that they do all the dumping or that their breakup was mutual? Why do all guys say that? If that's true then that means I'm the only one that gets dumped? Yeah right.
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smallcheese
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Re: Why do women always reject Winston?

Post by smallcheese »

I don't think women are rejecting you subliminally. They are rejecting you outright if they say that you're not their type or if they say it's me, not you. What a load of crap!!!! It's the same line men use on women too. If they are rejecting you, it's for good reasons, though they are personal and different for every woman.

During the courtship process of a non P4P woman, these are some typical questions that usually come up in conversation:

1. Have you been married before? Are you legally divorced or single now?
2. Have you fathered any children? If yes, how old are they?
3. How old are you?
4. What country are you from? (What's your citizenship?)
5. What do you do for a living?
6. Where do you live now? In the future?
7. Do you see yourself getting married any time soon? When?

So what's your answers to these questions Winston?

I would bet that whatever answers you give during this interrogation, will give a woman enough information to decide whether to reject you or not. The answers to these questions matter even more if you're not Brad Pitt or an above average looking man. Looks matter! Don't believe anyone who tells you that it doesn't. But in poorer countries like the Philippines or Vietnam, looks matter less and what a man brings to the table economically and a man's personality, has greater weight. It's the reason why I think large age gaps are considered more normal in these countries and less frowned upon than in Westernized countries.

If you're dealing with P4P women, then all of the above are just conversation starters. Whether they are escorts or bar girls, the goal is to get you to pay for their time with you. So if it means making you believe that they truly care about you and are falling in love with you, so be it. As long as it closes the deal and they can get you to pay for their services, that's all they want. Over time, if you become a repeat customer and it seems like you are falling in love with a P4P woman, then the above answers to these questions become more important. In the Philippines where sales girls can get paid as low as 100 pesos a day, a P4P woman spending hours and hours of time with you, buttering you up so that you will pay her 1000 or more pesos for companionship and sex, is a good ROI.

So Winston if women are rejecting you, I think it's because of your answers to these questions (I'm sure there are many more that I haven't listed here) and your physical attractiveness to a woman. If a woman is seriously looking for a long term commitment and you're not, she will figure it out no matter how ambiguous or vague your answers might be. Unless of course, she's still young and naïve. Depending on the woman's individual situation, she will decide if she wants to invest any more time with you or just reject you outright by telling you that "you're just not my type". :-)
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Rock
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Re: Why do women always reject Winston?

Post by Rock »

Winston wrote:Why do women always tell me I'm not their type? Even if they like me at first or dig me in the beginning, they always change their mind and eventually say that. Is there something about my vibe that causes this? Is it cause I lack testosterone or masculinity? Something about me must be subliminally causing women to reject me. What is it?

Perhaps because I'm non-materialistic and live in the realm of imagination and out of touch with the materialistic practical world and don't fit into it, I give off a vibe that subliminally tells women that I am not a good provider?

They can never explain it. Yet they always give me that line that looks don't matter to them and that it's not me but them that's the problem, blah blah.

Why do women always lie and say that looks don't matter when we all know they do? Is there some mass collusion among women to always speak that lie? Most women I know, even in Asia, say that looks don't matter to them. But men are more honest and will admit that looks do matter in attraction. Yet the western media makes it appear that men lie more than women do. Go figure.

Also why does every guy, including my friends, claim that they never get dumped and that they do all the dumping or that their breakup was mutual? Why do all guys say that? If that's true then that means I'm the only one that gets dumped? Yeah right.
Wait a minute. You and I have both acknowledged that in Taiwan and certain other parts of Asia, we sometimes see nerdy/geeky, unattractive, skinny, short, or fat local guys with hot local female girlfriends or even wives. Such couples are not at all uncommon here, even though the guys in question may not have money or other apparent compensating factor. As for masculinity and apparent T-levels, some of the most popular guys you see in Asia have an androgynous or even feminine look. So clearly something more is going on than just looks or low masculinity, right?

I think girls look at guys as a total package. They look observe many details and their gut comes to a conclusion fairly fast.

As for your last part, I'm your friend and I have been dumped plenty of times. I openly admit that. My very first gf dumped me. I've also been dumped by girls I dated in Taiwan. I know in one particular case, she cut me off because (and I found this out later through an objective third party) I was too boring and nice. Well those rejections have taught me things so I've done my best to adjust accordingly and be as strong as possible. But still, some girls are just going to reject you after a date or two. It just goes with the turf.

Very young girls often change, flake, or reject guys for the silliest of reasons. But as they get past mid 20s territory and especially into 30s, it all become more clear and pragmatic. Cus as you know girls in China beyond mid-20s are usually feeling pressure to find a spouse unless they have decided to be permanent independent types. So say a 31 year old girl might reject you more for say seeming unstable, not having resources to provide a decent life, and/or not being marriage minded.

I know I haven't answered all your questions but does what I say make any sense to you?
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Re: Why do women always reject Winston?

Post by droid »

What happened man? did that new chick flake on you? Sorry to hear that if that's the case but don't worry about it man just Next her, there are gazillions more out there in china.
One thing we can count with these days is flakiness though :roll: .

To address your questions,

For one i do think you have to work on your weight Winston, as we've told you many times. you'll be more attractive and will gain some real (non-fake) confidence. It does make a difference even though women don't openly talk about that. If you're puffy it can be seen as less masculine.
Losing weight is something that's within one's control, unlike height, etc. and will max your potential.
In gone-by eras you could just be a chubby provider and be quite the catch, but unfortunately today's women -even if poor- can be more judgmental on this stuff.

The other part could be your demeanor. I'm no dating guru and i don't know you personally, but i observe this:

-Too much pandering with compliments, that has to be used sparingly, like all good things in life.

-Being too agreeable or pandering, again what i was observing from your podcast with the filipino girl the other day.

-You spill all your beans too easily man, and that might project weakness. unfortunately you can't be that honest about your feelings with women lest they see you as one of "them". I've made that mistake and it's hard to recover your 'value' (crap I'm sounding like a PUA now).

-Perhaps (and i've done this in the past) talking about stuff that's even slightly technical, you lose them in a nanosecond with that. In spite of what we've been brainwashed with, women are generally not capable of technical thought (i really wish they were). So that's something to be avoided, instead emotion and humor are needed, and a bit of snarkasm these days.
I would say women have metaphorical brains, it seems to me playing with that can work.

-Again, I really don't know you, but from your other posts I would think you're complaining to waiters and cashiers in an annoying way, presentation-wise.
Do you do this during dates?

- In my case, I've consciously made my voice more masculine as part of my personal development. Since in the past i was more introverted and shy, i think my voice transmitted a bit of meekness. Now with all my life experience and understanding of people's bullshit I'm not really shy anymore; but i realized i had to project more command in my tone. Perhaps you should try this.

That's just my two cents. I have to back the crap above up with something Lol,so i should say this lady I've seen a couple times texts me "you're a hard-to-get boy", "and i love that". WTF? lol i must be doing it "right" :roll:
1)Too much of one thing defeats the purpose.
2)Everybody is full of it. What's your hypocrisy?
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Re: Why do women always reject Winston?

Post by starchild5 »

The women that rejected me most of the time had better life's in India after they found the guy they liked. Women has to run through many equations on her mind than we men do to find a suitable match.

Its not just good looks alone....The urge of pro-creation in women is so strong like for men flapping*1000 times....more than sex itself.....

Like she can't imagine her baby ending up on the streets once you leave her....That's her biggest worry...They look more for social security....They want their kids to be well off too...It goes one step more than we men can ever imagine...

I'm glad that many women rejected me...Now that I know my true nature, I would have dumped them and moved to a new catch and wasted her primary life.....That's evil...

In short...What we are doing is ..a form of TRAP..will she fall for it or not...some lay the trap with money, some with looks, some with charm and words etc....and If she don't fall for it...we get angry and blame her...If ever you had a good intention...You wouldn't mind her rejecting you...because you know deep down ...you were right and that's what it matters...The reason now we are complaining is because..ohh look...she did not fall into my trap..I need to create a bigger and better trap for her to fall...Please help
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Re: Why do women always reject Winston?

Post by starchild5 »

droid wrote:What happened man? did that new chick flake on you? Sorry to hear that if that's the case but don't worry about it man just Next her, there are gazillions more out there in china.
One thing we can count with these days is flakiness though :roll: .

To address your questions,

For one i do think you have to work on your weight Winston, as we've told you many times. you'll be more attractive and will gain some real (non-fake) confidence. It does make a difference even though women don't openly talk about that. If you're puffy it can be seen as less masculine.
Losing weight is something that's within one's control, unlike height, etc. and will max your potential.
In gone-by eras you could just be a chubby provider and be quite the catch, but unfortunately today's women -even if poor- can be more judgmental on this stuff.

The other part could be your demeanor. I'm no dating guru and i don't know you personally, but i observe this:

-Too much pandering with compliments, that has to be used sparingly, like all good things in life.

-Being too agreeable or pandering, again what i was observing from your podcast with the filipino girl the other day.

-You spill all your beans too easily man, and that might project weakness. unfortunately you can't be that honest about your feelings with women lest they see you as one of "them". I've made that mistake and it's hard to recover your 'value' (crap I'm sounding like a PUA now).

-Perhaps (and i've done this in the past) talking about stuff that's even slightly technical, you lose them in a nanosecond with that. In spite of what we've been brainwashed with, women are generally not capable of technical thought (i really wish they were). So that's something to be avoided, instead emotion and humor are needed, and a bit of snarkasm these days.
I would say women have metaphorical brains, it seems to me playing with that can work.

-Again, I really don't know you, but from your other posts I would think you're complaining to waiters and cashiers in an annoying way, presentation-wise.
Do you do this during dates?

- In my case, I've consciously made my voice more masculine as part of my personal development. Since in the past i was more introverted and shy, i think my voice transmitted a bit of meekness. Now with all my life experience and understanding of people's bullshit I'm not really shy anymore; but i realized i had to project more command in my tone. Perhaps you should try this.

That's just my two cents. I have to back the crap above up with something Lol,so i should say this lady I've seen a couple times texts me "you're a hard-to-get boy", "and i love that". WTF? lol i must be doing it "right" :roll:

Don't feed the Evil in us ...Droid :lol:

You missed the one point..TRUST...A promise to be with her till death do us apart.....All these are mere traps for women to fall into from PUA to working out to good looks to losing weight...Women have lost trust in Men...We don't keep our promises anymore that's why it has become difficult to get a women...We cheat, We lie...

Ok...lets see...What is the end game of it...Winston has not laid out his goal if he truly finds the girl he loves...Sorry....I don't want to go there but since, he posted his message to Diane...It doesn't look very positive for a women if she ends up with Winston....Where is the PROMISE...?

I have cheated multiple girls in Philippines to know..I cannot be trusted....Why are good looks for? Why should Winston loose weight? What is the end goal....Pump and Dump?

What are beautiful women for?

Why do you need women for?

What is your end GOAL...Your True Intention....We have not addressed that...

Men and women have different goals...

If you make your intention clear..looks won't even matter....Men love to play the Chaotic game...Not really disclosing their true intention but hiding in good looks, money, losing weight etc as a form of trap.... :roll: :roll:

Humanity has lost trust and have lost Soul with it..It will only get worse for all of us...Looks, money. losing weight will only take us so far and then bring us back to square one...We need more trust not looks. We don't keep our promises anymore...It has just become a GAME...

Ask yourself, how many promises you have kept with a women...Me..ZERO... :) ..hence, I deserve all the rejection...
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Re: Why do women always reject Winston?

Post by Yohan »

Winston wrote: ... why does every guy, including my friends, claim that they never get dumped and that they do all the dumping or that their breakup was mutual? Why do all guys say that? If that's true then that means I'm the only one that gets dumped? Yeah right.
I can hardly imagine that Western men who never got dumped do exist. - I don't think it is true what your friends are telling you. They are liars. They all got dumped many times already, but they might be ashamed to talk about it. - Western society gives them the feeling it's all their own fault.

Maybe they also gave up and they don't care anymore if they are dumped. Most Western women have anyway multiple boyfriends, they are not missing much openly said.

However, Winston, you are Asian-American, your case is rather different, you had plenty of chances to meet women in your past, you had sex with plenty of women either for free or against payment, you have been in USA and Asia and I cannot believe that you cannot find a woman for yourself for a long-term relationship. - You are also promoting internet dating sites very actively with your own webpages.

I think you yourself are not much interested in a long-term relationship and prefer to be single and independent - even if you claim the opposite.
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Re: Why do women always reject Winston?

Post by zboy1 »

LOL, Winston. You've already dated a ton of women already in China, and have gotten more success from cold-approaches than me (and I can safely say that I'm probably in better physical shape than you). So what are you complaining about? You're doing great!

You've sent me pictures of some pretty attractive girls too, so I think you're doing alright. You're not going to have 100 percent success rate--even if you look Brad Pitt or Daniel Dae Kim, LOL! So, relax. Enjoy the girls, Winston.
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Re: Why do women always reject Winston?

Post by OutWest »

starchild5 wrote:The women that rejected me most of the time had better life's in India after they found the guy they liked. Women has to run through many equations on her mind than we men do to find a suitable match.

Its not just good looks alone....The urge of pro-creation in women is so strong like for men flapping*1000 times....more than sex itself.....

Like she can't imagine her baby ending up on the streets once you leave her....That's her biggest worry...They look more for social security....They want their kids to be well off too...It goes one step more than we men can ever imagine...

I'm glad that many women rejected me...Now that I know my true nature, I would have dumped them and moved to a new catch and wasted her primary life.....That's evil...

In short...What we are doing is ..a form of TRAP..will she fall for it or not...some lay the trap with money, some with looks, some with charm and words etc....and If she don't fall for it...we get angry and blame her...If ever you had a good intention...You wouldn't mind her rejecting you...because you know deep down ...you were right and that's what it matters...The reason now we are complaining is because..ohh look...she did not fall into my trap..I need to create a bigger and better trap for her to fall...Please help

You are being brutally honest. Not many have your guts.
+1
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Re: Why do women always reject Winston?

Post by smallcheese »

starchild5 wrote: Don't feed the Evil in us ...Droid :lol:

You missed the one point..TRUST...A promise to be with her till death do us apart.....All these are mere traps for women to fall into from PUA to working out to good looks to losing weight...Women have lost trust in Men...We don't keep our promises anymore that's why it has become difficult to get a women...We cheat, We lie...

Ok...lets see...What is the end game of it...Winston has not laid out his goal if he truly finds the girl he loves...Sorry....I don't want to go there but since, he posted his message to Diane...It doesn't look very positive for a women if she ends up with Winston....Where is the PROMISE...?

I have cheated multiple girls in Philippines to know..I cannot be trusted....Why are good looks for? Why should Winston loose weight? What is the end goal....Pump and Dump?

What are beautiful women for?

Why do you need women for?

What is your end GOAL...Your True Intention....We have not addressed that...

Men and women have different goals...

If you make your intention clear..looks won't even matter....Men love to play the Chaotic game...Not really disclosing their true intention but hiding in good looks, money, losing weight etc as a form of trap.... :roll: :roll:

Humanity has lost trust and have lost Soul with it..It will only get worse for all of us...Looks, money. losing weight will only take us so far and then bring us back to square one...We need more trust not looks. We don't keep our promises anymore...It has just become a GAME...

Ask yourself, how many promises you have kept with a women...Me..ZERO... :) ..hence, I deserve all the rejection...
+1

What Winston wants and what a woman that he is pursuing wants are two totally different things. Until he finds a woman whose goals match his own, he will never be happy or satisfied. I think that Winston has learned that he has to lie in order to make any progress with any woman he pursues. Because if a woman finds out what his true intention or end goal is, she will reject him. Winston's goals and her goals are not the same. They are incompatible, like fire and water. And so he gets rejected, over and over again. Why is this so difficult to understand???

I imagine that what Winston wants is a female version of himself who is a sexy super model who will overlook all of his faults and give him mind blowing sex whenever he wants it with no strings attached. And also entertain him endlessly with her wit, humor and intelligence. And once her beauty fades and the sex becomes routine, it's on to the next woman. Good luck with that, LOL!!!!! :-) :-) :-)
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Re: Why do women always reject Winston?

Post by droid »

starchild5 wrote: Don't feed the Evil in us ...Droid :lol:
You missed the one point..TRUST...A promise to be with her till death do us apart.....All these are mere traps for women to fall into from PUA to working out to good looks to losing weight...Women have lost trust in Men...We don't keep our promises anymore that's why it has become difficult to get a women...We cheat, We lie...

Ok...lets see...What is the end game of it...Winston has not laid out his goal if he truly finds the girl he loves...Sorry....I don't want to go there but since, he posted his message to Diane...It doesn't look very positive for a women if she ends up with Winston....Where is the PROMISE...?

I have cheated multiple girls in Philippines to know..I cannot be trusted....Why are good looks for? Why should Winston loose weight? What is the end goal....Pump and Dump?

What are beautiful women for?

Why do you need women for?

What is your end GOAL...Your True Intention....We have not addressed that...

Men and women have different goals...

If you make your intention clear..looks won't even matter....Men love to play the Chaotic game...Not really disclosing their true intention but hiding in good looks, money, losing weight etc as a form of trap.... :roll: :roll:

Humanity has lost trust and have lost Soul with it..It will only get worse for all of us...Looks, money. losing weight will only take us so far and then bring us back to square one...We need more trust not looks. We don't keep our promises anymore...It has just become a GAME...

Ask yourself, how many promises you have kept with a women...Me..ZERO... :) ..hence, I deserve all the rejection...
smallcheese wrote:I imagine that what Winston wants is a female version of himself who is a sexy super model who will overlook all of his faults and give him mind blowing sex whenever he wants it with no strings attached. And also entertain him endlessly with her wit, humor and intelligence. And once her beauty fades and the sex becomes routine, it's on to the next woman. Good luck with that, LOL!!!!!
Great points Starchild, smallcheese.

To be honest and i think Winston is on the same camp, guys like Winston and I, who did not get much action in school etc, are trying to compensate for lost time and get the validation of being a player with hot girls, aside from the physiological satisfaction, at least for a while.So yeah casual dating is one of the goals.

You're right that going straight for marriage and making those intentions clear will make those more traditional women more immediately accepting.

But you guys are elevating women to a saint-level too. They also set up 'traps' for us and are looking for what's 'best' for them too, like everyone else. And they sleep around as well so let's not get too one sided here.
zboy1 wrote:LOL, Winston. You've already dated a ton of women already in China, and have gotten more success from cold-approaches than me (and I can safely say that I'm probably in better physical shape than you). So what are you complaining about? You're doing great!
You've sent me pictures of some pretty attractive girls too, so I think you're doing alright. You're not going to have 100 percent success rate--even if you look Brad Pitt or Daniel Dae Kim, LOL! So, relax. Enjoy the girls, Winston.
So his whole post was kind of dishonest then... How come he hasn't reported on that or posted any pictures? :evil:
1)Too much of one thing defeats the purpose.
2)Everybody is full of it. What's your hypocrisy?
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Re: Why do women like Winston but then change their mind?

Post by Winston »

To everyone:

Here's the event that caused me to start this thread. Can you all read it and make sense out of it? It's totally inexplicable and unbelievable!

viewtopic.php?f=11&t=26294&p=221717#p221717
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Re: Why do women always reject Winston?

Post by Winston »

smallcheese wrote:I don't think women are rejecting you subliminally. They are rejecting you outright if they say that you're not their type or if they say it's me, not you. What a load of crap!!!! It's the same line men use on women too. If they are rejecting you, it's for good reasons, though they are personal and different for every woman.

During the courtship process of a non P4P woman, these are some typical questions that usually come up in conversation:

1. Have you been married before? Are you legally divorced or single now?
2. Have you fathered any children? If yes, how old are they?
3. How old are you?
4. What country are you from? (What's your citizenship?)
5. What do you do for a living?
6. Where do you live now? In the future?
7. Do you see yourself getting married any time soon? When?

So what's your answers to these questions Winston?

I would bet that whatever answers you give during this interrogation, will give a woman enough information to decide whether to reject you or not. The answers to these questions matter even more if you're not Brad Pitt or an above average looking man. Looks matter! Don't believe anyone who tells you that it doesn't. But in poorer countries like the Philippines or Vietnam, looks matter less and what a man brings to the table economically and a man's personality, has greater weight. It's the reason why I think large age gaps are considered more normal in these countries and less frowned upon than in Westernized countries.

If you're dealing with P4P women, then all of the above are just conversation starters. Whether they are escorts or bar girls, the goal is to get you to pay for their time with you. So if it means making you believe that they truly care about you and are falling in love with you, so be it. As long as it closes the deal and they can get you to pay for their services, that's all they want. Over time, if you become a repeat customer and it seems like you are falling in love with a P4P woman, then the above answers to these questions become more important. In the Philippines where sales girls can get paid as low as 100 pesos a day, a P4P woman spending hours and hours of time with you, buttering you up so that you will pay her 1000 or more pesos for companionship and sex, is a good ROI.

So Winston if women are rejecting you, I think it's because of your answers to these questions (I'm sure there are many more that I haven't listed here) and your physical attractiveness to a woman. If a woman is seriously looking for a long term commitment and you're not, she will figure it out no matter how ambiguous or vague your answers might be. Unless of course, she's still young and naïve. Depending on the woman's individual situation, she will decide if she wants to invest any more time with you or just reject you outright by telling you that "you're just not my type". :-)
Come on. I'm not stupid. I am a chess player and see everything in terms of advantages vs. disadvantages. I'm highly calculating and do not make obvious mistakes and blunders. Do you think I'm that stupid to say things that can be used against me? I can be like a politician too.

But that's not the problem. Women do not reject you for giving wrong answers. Remember you can give all the right answers to the wrong person and she will still be wrong for you. You can give all the wrong answers to the right person, and she will still love you and cling to you.

Rock says a lot of things that make me and him look bad to women, but they still like him. How do you explain that? Women aren't as formulaic as you think they are. Don't you have enough experience with women to know that? They aren't computers that accept and reject based on your answers. Come on now.
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Re: Why do women like Winston but then change their mind?

Post by Devil Dog »

Here are your problems, Winston:

1. You are needy. Who gives a shit that the chick made out with you and then got flaky? Next!
2. You have a history which will scare off any traditional-type woman.
3. You don't know how to project strength and authority to women.
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