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American Women Jokes LOL

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odbo
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Joined: January 6th, 2011, 2:40 pm

American Women Jokes LOL

Post by odbo » January 29th, 2011, 7:49 am

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^ very accurate! :o



Image

Winston posted this on another thread but some western shemale jinxed it by responding. so please, if any women respond to this, don't bother trying to appeal to their logical side.

http://www.rooshv.com/42-things-wrong-with-american-women

42 Things Wrong With American Women
By Roosh

1. They’re fat.

2. They’re constantly glued to their phone.

3. They cut their hair short.

4. They’re more impressed by a crappy DJ than a doctor who saves lives.

5. They think being funny and witty is a quality that men love.

6. They listen to magazines like Cosmo when it comes to pleasing men.

7. They don’t know how to cook.

8. They wear flip-flops even when they’re not at the beach, pool, or in their house.

9. They have condoms in their drawers because they expect to have random sex with strange men.

10. They cannot dance. They also do not know how to sing or play basic musical instruments.

11. They idolize drug addicted celebrities, mimicking their brain-dead behaviors.

12. They acquire pets instead of putting effort into landing a quality man.

13. They don’t know how to be sexy.

Image

14. They have standards way beyond their level of attractiveness.

15. They think having a good job means they’re a good catch.

16. They wear pajamas in public.

17. They like Twilight and The Secret.

18. Their idea of travel is going to the beach or France.

19. They have too many trashy tattoos.

20. They are proud to date multiple guys at the same time, as if they were men.

21. They are not close to their family, and would rather die than take care of aging parents.

22. They say filthy things in bed when you hardly know them.

23. They cockblock regularly.

24. They make lame excuses for not putting effort into their appearance.

25. They obsess about the environment above what is reasonable, even though they pollute more than 90% of people in the world.

26. They always lie by saying, “I’ve never done this before.�

27. They confuse being a challenge with being whiny and annoying.

28. They are acne prone.

29. They watch way too much TV.

30. On their way home from work, they put on dirty sneakers that don’t match their outfit.

31. They only dress up for special occasions, like a friend’s birthday, Presidential inauguration, or a Sex and the City movie premiere.

32. They like to age their skin prematurely through frequent tanning.

33. They insist on eating pizza or otherwise fattening food after a night of binge drinking.

34. They’re obsessed with cupcakes.

35. They care more about maintaining their career than a good home.

36. They rarely wear high heels.

37. They think dining out and eating food slathered with butter and salt makes them cultured.

38. They don’t speak a foreign language.

39. They are uncomfortable in their own skin.

40. They like Ikea furniture.

41. They have the intellectual curiosity of a dung beetle.

42. They go on and on about the stupidest shit.


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odbo
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Post by odbo » February 13th, 2011, 10:49 am

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onezero4u
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Post by onezero4u » February 13th, 2011, 3:13 pm

id buy a few tshirts of the china girl price list poster & wear it proudly
marriage is a 3 ring circus: engagement ring, wedding ring and then suffering.

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jamesbond
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Location: USA

Post by jamesbond » February 13th, 2011, 4:03 pm

ImageImage
ImageImageImage
"When I think about the idea of getting involved with an American woman, I don't know if I should laugh .............. or vomit!"

"Trying to meet women in America is like trying to decipher Egyptian hieroglyphics."

odbo
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Post by odbo » March 6th, 2011, 1:32 am

On a beautiful deserted island in the middle of nowhere, the following people are stranded:

2 Italian men and 1 Italian woman
2 French men and 1 French woman
2 German men and 1 German woman
2 Greek men and 1 Greek woman
2 English men and 1 English woman
2 Polish men and 1 Polish woman
2 Japanese men and 1 Japanese woman
2 American men and 1 American woman
2 Australian men and 1 Australian woman
2 New Zealand men and 1 New Zealand woman
2 Irish men and 1 Irish woman

One month later, the following things have occurred:

One Italian man killed the other Italian man for the Italian woman.

The two French men and the French woman are living happily together having loads of sex.

The two German men have a strict weekly schedule of when they alternate with the German woman.

The two English men are waiting for someone to introduce them to the English woman.

The Polish men took a long look at the endless ocean and one look at the Polish woman and they started swimming.

The two American men are contemplating the virtues of suicide, while the American woman keeps on bitching about her body being her own, the true nature of feminism, how she can do everything that they can do, about the necessity of fulfillment, the equal division of household chores, how her last boyfriend respected her opinion and treated her much nicer and how her relationship with her mother is improving. But at least the taxes here are low and it is not raining.

The two Japanese men have faxed Tokyo and are waiting for instructions.

The two Australian men beat each other senseless fighting over the Australian woman, who is checking out all the other men, after calling them both 'bloody wankers".

Both New Zealand men are searching the island for sheep.

The Irish began by dividing the island into North and South and by setting up a distillery. They do not remember if sex is in the picture because it gets sort of foggy after the first few liters of coconut whiskey, but they are satisfied in that at least the English are not getting any.

Image

HEAVEN IS WHEN YOU HAVE...

AN AMERICAN SALARY
A BRITISH HOME
CHINESE FOOD
A GERMAN CAR &
A LATIN WIFE

HELL IS WHEN YOU HAVE...

AN AMERICAN CAR
A BRITISH WIFE
A CHINESE HOME
GERMAN FOOD
A LATIN SALARY


source: http://www.ekmekci.com/humour.htm

odbo
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Post by odbo » April 25th, 2011, 3:09 am


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Winston
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Re: Let's laugh at American women

Post by Winston » August 25th, 2017, 8:13 pm

LOL

Image
Check out my video series Female Encounters of the Foreign Kind and Full Russia Trip Videos!

Also see my HA Grand Ebook and Join Our Dating Sites to support us!

"It takes far less effort to find and move to the society that has what you want than it does to try to reconstruct an existing society to match your standards." - Harry Browne, How I Found Freedom in an Unfree World

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Re: American Women Jokes LOL

Post by Winston » September 17th, 2017, 12:55 am

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Check out my video series Female Encounters of the Foreign Kind and Full Russia Trip Videos!

Also see my HA Grand Ebook and Join Our Dating Sites to support us!

"It takes far less effort to find and move to the society that has what you want than it does to try to reconstruct an existing society to match your standards." - Harry Browne, How I Found Freedom in an Unfree World

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Re: American Women Jokes LOL

Post by Winston » September 17th, 2017, 1:42 am

These are hilarious and true! LOL

http://www.jokes4us.com/dirtyjokes/womenjokes.html

A quiet man, is a thinking man.
A quiet woman, is usually mad.

Q: Why is life like a penis?
A: Women make it hard!

Q: What do you call a woman without an asshole?
A: SINGLE!

Q: What do you call a letter from a feminist?
A: Hate male.

Q: What is the definition of eternity?
A: The time that elapses from when you come till she goes.

Q: Why do men have 2 heads and women 4 lips?
A: Cause men do all the thinking and women do all the talking.

Q: What's the difference between a knife and a woman arguing?
A: A knife has a point.

Q: How much money do you need to satisfy a woman?
A: It is always just a little bit more.

Q: What have women and condoms got in common?
A: If they're not on your dick they're in your wallet.

Q: How is a woman like an airplane?
A: Both have cockpits.

Q: What takes up 12 parking spaces?
A: 6 Women drivers.

Q: Why do women like to have sex with the lights off?
A: They can't stand to see a man have a good time!

Q: What's 6 inches long, 2 inches wide and drives women wild?
A: A $100 bill.

Q: What do you call a girl with PMS and ESP?
A: A bitch who thinks she knows everything.

Q: What's the difference between a woman and a refrigerator?
A: A refrigerator doesn't moan when you put meat in it.

Q: What is the difference between your wife and your job?
A: After five years your job still sucks.

Q: Why did God create lesbians?
A: So feminists couldn't breed.

Q: Why did God give men penises?
A: So they'd have at least one way to shut a woman up.

Q: What do you call a woman that has lost 95% of her intelligence?
A: Divorced.

Q: What's easier to pick up the heavier it gets?
A: Women.

Q: What's the difference between your bonus and your dick?
A: You don't have to beg a woman to blow your bonus.

LOL This one is great! LOL

Q: Why are hurricanes normally named after women?
A: When they come they're wild and wet, but when they go they take your house and car with them.

Q: How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: None, feminists can't change anything.

Q: How is a woman like a road?
A: Both have manholes.

Q: What do you call a woman with an opinion?
A: Wrong.

Q: What do you call a Chinese woman with an opinion?
A: Wong

Q: What does f***ing a woman and cooking an egg in the microwave have in common?
A: Both end with a loud, annoying sound and a gooey mess to clean up.

Q: How do you turn a fox into an elephant?
A: Marry It!

Q: Why shouldn't you lie to a woman with PMS & GPS?
A: Because she's a bitch & she will find you.

Q: What's the smartest thing to ever come out a woman's mouth?
A: Einstein's cock...

Q: How many men does it take to open a beer?
A: None, it should be opened when she brings it to you.

Q: Why does a man like to see two women kiss each other?
A: Two less mouths that are bitching.

Q: Why can't women drive?
A: Because there's no road between the kitchen and the bedroom

Q: How can you tell if your wife is dead?
A: The sex is the same but the dishes pile up.

Q: Why do Jewish men have to be circumcised?
A: Because a Jewish women wont touch anything unless it's 20% off

Q: Why do women wear underwear?
A: Because workplace health and safety states 'all manholes must be covered when not in use'!

Q: How is a woman like a condom?
A: Both spend more time in your wallet than on your dick.

Q: Why does a bride smile when she walks up the aisle?
A: She knows she's given her last blow job.

Q: How do you know when a woman is going to say something intelligent?
A: When her first words are, "A man once told me....."

Boy: "I named my dog after you"
Girl: "Aww because it's cute."
Boy: "No, because it's a b*tch."

Q: Why hasn't a female been to the moon?
A: Because it doesn't need cleaning yet!

Q: What do you call an all women workplace?
A: Unsupervised.

Q: Why do women wear white on their wedding day?
A: So they will match the stove and fridge!

Q: What's the difference between a bitch and a whore?
A: A whore f***s everybody at the party, and a bitch f***s everybody at the party EXCEPT YOU.

Q: What's the difference between a Catholic wife and a Jewish wife?
A: A Catholic wife has real orgasms and fake jewelry.

Q: Why did God make man first?
A: He didn't want a woman looking over his shoulder.

Q: Which is the odd one out: a woman, a microwave or a fridge?
A: The microwave, the other two leak when they're f***ed.

Q: Whats the difference between PMS and Mad Cow Disease?
A: One attacks the cow's brain and sends it f***ing mental, the other is an agricultural problem.

Q: What food diminishes a woman's sex drive by 90%?
A: Wedding Cake!

Q: What is the difference between a Feminist and a Dog?
A: You tell me!

Q: How are women and rocks alike?
A: You skip the flat ones!

Q: What is the difference between a cheap hooker and an elephant?
A: One rolls on its back for peanuts and the other one lives in a zoo.

Q: How are women like parking spaces?
A: The good ones are taken and the rest are handicapped.

Q: What's the difference between a Woman with PMS and a Pit Bull?
A: Lipstick

Q: Why do women close their eyes during sex?
A: They can't stand to see a man having a good time.

A jealous woman does better research than the FBI.

Men: Bros before Hoes.
Women: Sisters before Misters.

Q: What is the difference between good girl and a bad girl?
A: The good girl, goes out, goes home and goes to bed. The bad girl, goes out, goes to bed and then goes home.

Women fall in love with what they hear, men fall in love with what they can see, that's why women wear make up and men lie.

Women fake orgasms to have relationships. Men fake relationships to have orgasms.

Women who strive to be equal to men lack ambition.

Confucius says, "Women who sit on judges lap, get honorable discharge".
Check out my video series Female Encounters of the Foreign Kind and Full Russia Trip Videos!

Also see my HA Grand Ebook and Join Our Dating Sites to support us!

"It takes far less effort to find and move to the society that has what you want than it does to try to reconstruct an existing society to match your standards." - Harry Browne, How I Found Freedom in an Unfree World

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Master
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Re: American Women Jokes LOL

Post by Master » December 4th, 2017, 3:36 am

odbo wrote:
January 29th, 2011, 7:49 am
Image


^ very accurate! :o



Image

Winston posted this on another thread but some western shemale jinxed it by responding. so please, if any women respond to this, don't bother trying to appeal to their logical side.

http://www.rooshv.com/42-things-wrong-w ... ican-women

42 Things Wrong With American Women
By Roosh

1. They’re fat.

2. They’re constantly glued to their phone.

3. They cut their hair short.

4. They’re more impressed by a crappy DJ than a doctor who saves lives.

5. They think being funny and witty is a quality that men love.

6. They listen to magazines like Cosmo when it comes to pleasing men.

7. They don’t know how to cook.

8. They wear flip-flops even when they’re not at the beach, pool, or in their house.

9. They have condoms in their drawers because they expect to have random sex with strange men.

10. They cannot dance. They also do not know how to sing or play basic musical instruments.

11. They idolize drug addicted celebrities, mimicking their brain-dead behaviors.

12. They acquire pets instead of putting effort into landing a quality man.

13. They don’t know how to be sexy.

Image

14. They have standards way beyond their level of attractiveness.

15. They think having a good job means they’re a good catch.

16. They wear pajamas in public.

17. They like Twilight and The Secret.

18. Their idea of travel is going to the beach or France.

19. They have too many trashy tattoos.

20. They are proud to date multiple guys at the same time, as if they were men.

21. They are not close to their family, and would rather die than take care of aging parents.

22. They say filthy things in bed when you hardly know them.

23. They cockblock regularly.

24. They make lame excuses for not putting effort into their appearance.

25. They obsess about the environment above what is reasonable, even though they pollute more than 90% of people in the world.

26. They always lie by saying, “I’ve never done this before.�

27. They confuse being a challenge with being whiny and annoying.

28. They are acne prone.

29. They watch way too much TV.

30. On their way home from work, they put on dirty sneakers that don’t match their outfit.

31. They only dress up for special occasions, like a friend’s birthday, Presidential inauguration, or a Sex and the City movie premiere.

32. They like to age their skin prematurely through frequent tanning.

33. They insist on eating pizza or otherwise fattening food after a night of binge drinking.

34. They’re obsessed with cupcakes.

35. They care more about maintaining their career than a good home.

36. They rarely wear high heels.

37. They think dining out and eating food slathered with butter and salt makes them cultured.

38. They don’t speak a foreign language.

39. They are uncomfortable in their own skin.

40. They like Ikea furniture.

41. They have the intellectual curiosity of a dung beetle.

42. They go on and on about the stupidest shit.


Image

That Roosv list is pretty accurate. Cant think of one I cant agree with. I sometimes overlook what a mental case they all are by looking at their beauty which is also isnt much. lol. I guess forgetting they have a mind when I want to bang them actually makes me forget they exist.
Introduce a little anarchy. Upset the established order, and everything becomes chaos.
Become An Agent of Choas.

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