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The 20 biggest differences between dating in the UK and the US (2017/2018)

Discuss culture, living, traveling, relocating, dating or anything related to the European Countries.

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E Irizarry R&B Singer
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Posts: 2553
Joined: April 19th, 2013, 1:26 am

The 20 biggest differences between dating in the UK and the US (2017/2018)

Post by E Irizarry R&B Singer » July 19th, 2019, 9:06 pm

Source: https://www.insider.com/differences-dat ... us-2017-12

The 20 biggest differences between dating in the UK and the US
Chelsea Greenwood May 18, 2018, 11:28 AM
british american dating
Life for couples is a little different across the pond. Getty Images/Chris Jackson/Darren Gerrish
It's official: Meghan Markle and Prince Harry are married, and the world is in love with the pair. Because it's no small feat to ingratiate oneself into the royal family, with all its strict protocol, and we can only imagine what a whirlwind their relationship has been for the American actress.

Even under normal, non-royal circumstances, going out with someone from the UK isn't like dating a fellow American. The dating culture there has loads of differences, and even though our countries share a common tongue (no pun intended) and a lot of history, these distinctions just might surprise you.

Booze is an essential part of British dating.
Booze is an essential part of British dating.
Your drink tab is going to be higher in the UK. Pexels/Burst
Drinking culture is alive and well in both the United States and the United Kingdom. However, according to BBC America, going on a date in the UK without having a drink is simply not done — and getting hammered is a common occurrence. Although many Americans opt for some liquid courage on the dating scene, it's not considered a requisite.

Parental approval isn’t as important in Britain.
Parental approval isn’t as important in Britain.
Meeting mum and dad isn't as big of a deal. Unsplash/Amber Zewert
Taking the new boyfriend or girlfriend home to meet Mom and Dad is a big dating milestone in the US, and nobody wants to get the thumbs down from their folks. In the UK? Not so much.

"Americans seem to genuinely care about having their parents approve of their partner, whereas, while we Brits like it, we typically take an attitude that, if they don't approve, then they can ... mind their own business," Quora user Alec Fanes in a forum on this subject.

Brits want to meet in person sooner.
Brits want to meet in person sooner.
The texting game goes on for a shorter time. Shutterstock
When dating in the US, you might have to endure weeks of emailing and texting before graduating to phone calls and finally an in-person meeting with your love interest.

According to The Telegraph, Brits like to cut through the rigmarole and meet in person much sooner so as to not waste anyone's time with potentially misleading communication and emoji-deciphering.

Exclusivity is assumed in British dating.
Exclusivity is assumed in British dating.
It's not even a question. Shutterstock
Most Americans have experienced that point in a budding relationship when they decide to take things to the next level and become exclusive — meaning monogamy isn't assumed from the outset. Brits generally take a different approach and only see one person at a time.

"Back in my day, if you were going out with someone here in the UK, you were going out with them. There was none of this dating around and keeping your options open unless and until you'd had a conversation about it and agreed to be exclusive," British writer Louise Sheridan told INSIDER. "There was an automatic assumption that you were exclusive, and if it transpired you weren't, then it was called cheating."

Daytime dates are pretty much unheard of in the UK.
Daytime dates are pretty much unheard of in the UK.
A coffee date is a little more serious in the US. Shutterstock / YAKOBCHUK VIACHESLAV
It's not unusual for Americans to have a date over lunch or a cup of coffee. The daytime environment makes it seem more casual and less intimidating for some. But, in the UK, this isn't as much of a thing, said Tarn Rodgers Johns, a London writer and social media manager who spent a year of college in Colorado.

"I went on two accidental dates because I thought they were trying to be friends," she told INSIDER about men who asked her out for coffee.

British women are less self-conscious on dates.
British women are less self-conscious on dates.
The first-date jitters aren't as much of a thing. Shutterstock
Chris Rock has joked that you don't really meet someone on a first date. You meet their "representative." This is spot-on when it comes to dating US women, according to Harper's Bazaar.

Whereas British lasses will happily do, eat and drink whatever they want on a date, American women are much more concerned with appearances, and might opt for a dainty meal and maintain politically correct conversation to make the right impression.

UK singles are OK with chill dates.
UK singles are OK with chill dates.
It's not as buttoned-up. Jayme Burrows/Shutterstock
Just want to Netflix and chill — literally or figuratively? That's just a typical Saturday night for a couple dating in the UK, according to The Telegraph. Americans seem to prefer something a bit more exciting and expensive for their dates, like going to a dinner, a club, or a social event.

Brits are much less hung up on sex.
Brits are much less hung up on sex.
Sleeping with someone "too early" isn't necessarily a thing. Unsplash/George Coletrain
The unwritten rule of dating in the US is that people (particularly women) who get into bed with someone "too early" are presumed easy and might ruin their chances of a serious relationship.

The British are less concerned with propriety in this sense and tend to go as the spirit moves them, according to BBC America. Having sex on a first date is no big deal.

Double dates don’t happen in the UK.
Double dates don’t happen in the UK.
Don't expect your British friends to accompany you on any dates. Monkey Business Images/Shutterstock
"Wouldn't it be fun if the four of us got together and went out sometime?" — said no single British person ever. Although Americans keenly embrace this group dating approach, Brits are much more like to go one-on-one, unless they just happen to be out with a group of people, according to BuzzFeed.

British men are usually more low-key.
British men are usually more low-key.
They're more reserved. Shutterstock
On average, American men tend to be more animated, outspoken and affectionate than the lads in Britain, which is either a pro or a con for a date, depending on your comfort level.

"I found British men were a lot less affectionate or forthcoming with feelings unless they maybe had a drink or two," New York makeup artist and writer Rachel Toledo, who lived in London for 13 years, told INSIDER. "They were much more reserved, as American men are more huggy and communicative. Though the sense of humor of British boys is very fun to be around, and they can often be very 'cheeky' and charming when they want to be."

The lingo is different.
The lingo is different.
If you're dating in another country, you may want to pick up a few phrases. Shutterstock
If you're an American looking to date a Brit, you may want to brush up on their dating lingo. In America, you might say you're "into" someone, but in the UK, you "fancy" them. In America you "make out" with someone, but in the UK, you "snog" them.

In America you're "on the prowl" for a date, but, according to Bustle, you're "out on the pull."

Brits don’t approach strangers in public for dates.
Brits don’t approach strangers in public for dates.
People don't get picked up much in public. Ugur Akdemir/Unsplash
Whether at the club or at the gym, sometimes all it takes in the US is some mutual eye contact and small talk before you're swapping phone numbers with a stranger to set up a date.

Try chatting up a Londoner on the fly, and they'll look at you like you're absolutely daft, according to BuzzFeed.

In the UK, you date someone you already know.
In the UK, you date someone you already know.
Blind dates are not a thing. Beth Solano/Unsplash
In the US, it's perfectly acceptable to go on a date with someone you know little or nothing about (aka a blind date) in order to get to know them. Brits typically prefer to go out with people they're already familiar with and have a budding interest in.

"We tend to hang around in mixed-sex groups — friends from the office, photography club or whatever — until two people decide that they like each other, and then they start dating," said Quora user Claire Jordan in a forum on this subject.

20 questions isn’t a part of your typical British date.
20 questions isn’t a part of your typical British date.
A date should not look like an interview in the UK. Shutterstock
Since many Americans go out with people they don't know very well, it's common to ask plenty of questions — about one's background, education, ambitions, etc. — to get to know each other. However, this can seem like a formal interview, and Brits tend to be more easy-breezy and less prying, according to BBC America.

Your income isn’t important to your date in the UK.
Your income isn’t important to your date in the UK.
Don't ask about someone's salary. Reuters/ Shamil Zhumatov
For many Americans, it's all about the Benjamins when searching for a potential date (or mate), according to The Telegraph. On the other hand, flaunting one's income on a date is considered rude and a major turn-off in the UK.

British women are less pragmatic.
British women are less pragmatic.
They'll forgive a few mistakes in favor of love. Vladimir Kudinov/Unsplash
Maybe we've seen one too many romcoms, but American women — for better or for worse — are quick to call BS on a date and kick a suitor to the curb when one doesn't meet our standards.

Women across the pond seem a bit more forgiving and less judgmental when going out with someone, according to The Guardian, and are more likely to be swayed by emotion than cold, hard facts.

Brits don’t bring dates to special events.
Brits don’t bring dates to special events.
Going alone is the norm. Shutterstock
When a special event like a wedding or a holiday party looms on the horizon, American singles often scramble to find a date so they don't have to go stag. This doesn't translate to the UK, however, because singles there attend events in order to find a date, according to BuzzFeed. It's kind of a chicken-or-the-egg situation.

Brits are more likely to go dutch on the bill.
Brits are more likely to go dutch on the bill.
No free meals here. Unsplash/Bryan Apen
If you're looking to get a free meal out of your next date, don't try it in the UK. British men and women think it's appropriate and politically correct for both parties to split the check when out on a date, according to WeLoveDates.com.

Although there are certainly exceptions, old-fashioned gender roles still prevail in this and other areas of US dating scene.

Brits are more open-minded when it comes to physique.
Brits are more open-minded when it comes to physique.
The Brits seem more open-minded in this area. Unsplash/Courtney Clayton
Now, we're not saying that Americans are shallow, but singles here put a high value on physique when sizing up a dating partner. Brits are more willing to consider someone who isn't their preferred body type, according to The Telegraph.

Dating is much less structured in the UK.
Dating is much less structured in the UK.
If you want to call someone, you call 'em. Maridav/Shutterstock
We grapple with a lot of questions concerning protocol on the US dating scene: How soon should you call someone after a date? How long should you wait before sleeping with someone? When is it appropriate to meet the parents? Across the pond, singles tend to go with the flow.

"It's less structured, less formal here in the UK," said Quora user Alec Fanes in a forum on this subject. "In the US, there are tons of unwritten rules … In the UK, people tend to muddle through haphazardly much more. Haphazard muddling is much more our style."




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Zambales
Experienced Poster
Posts: 1518
Joined: August 9th, 2015, 9:41 pm

Re: The 20 biggest differences between dating in the UK and the US (2017/2018)

Post by Zambales » July 20th, 2019, 12:05 am

E Irizarry R&B Singer wrote:
July 19th, 2019, 9:06 pm
Source: https://www.insider.com/differences-dat ... us-2017-12

It's official: Meghan Markle and Prince Harry are married, and the world is in love with the pair.
Only those who fawn over royalty and celebrities. Everyone else doesn't give a shit - and rightly so!
Booze is an essential part of British dating — and getting hammered is a common occurrence.
Having a few alcoholic drinks on a date is a common occurrence. Getting hammered isn't as it's not good etiquette! Some people prefer meeting over coffee but I've never done this myself as it's seems to be overlapping into soy boy territory.
Parental approval isn’t as important in Britain.
Parental approval? What's that? :lol:
Daytime dates are pretty much unheard of in the UK
.
Really? I've been on several!
Double dates don’t happen in the UK.
Correct. I don't think it would cross anybody's mind. Sounds a bit weird actually.
Don't expect your British friends to accompany you on any dates.
Not strictly true. I've been on a date and she brought her friend along :roll: . More common is women bringing friends into the vicinity, such as a bar. They hover in the background but give the game away by constantly looking over.
Brits don’t approach strangers in public for dates.
Yes they do.
20 questions isn’t a part of your typical British date
No it isn't. That's too overbearing and would be deemed as creepy.
Your income isn’t important to your date in the UK.
In a roundabout way it can be. They won't ask how much you earn but one question that gets routinely asked is what you do for a living. This is how they gauge your income without sounding rude.
Brits are more likely to go dutch on the bill.
Well that's bullshit for a start. Only about 10% of my dates did this.

E Irizarry R&B Singer
Veteran Poster
Posts: 2553
Joined: April 19th, 2013, 1:26 am

Re: The 20 biggest differences between dating in the UK and the US (2017/2018)

Post by E Irizarry R&B Singer » July 20th, 2019, 4:53 am

@Zambales, thank you for you response. It's well-noted. :+1:

User avatar
Zambales
Experienced Poster
Posts: 1518
Joined: August 9th, 2015, 9:41 pm

Re: The 20 biggest differences between dating in the UK and the US (2017/2018)

Post by Zambales » July 25th, 2019, 9:47 pm

E Irizarry R&B Singer wrote:
July 20th, 2019, 4:53 am
@Zambales, thank you for you response. It's well-noted. :
Are you thinking of dating British women? I wouldn't bother if I was you, unless you' have a mammoth amount of time to weed out the hoards of undesirables.

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