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Seeking Advice: Dealing With Obnoxious Americans Abroad

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Re: Seeking Advice: Dealing With Obnoxious Americans Abroad

Postby MrMan » July 1st, 2017, 4:57 pm

My last wasn't directed at the particulars you mentioned in the OP. But in both of those cases, it does sound like the men were overly familiar. But it sounds like you overreacted in both cases, especially decking the drunk guy, who, based on your story, didn't seem like he was trying to hurt you, just acting foolish when drunk. His friends probably would have kept him away from you. You probably could have gotten away from the other guy without making him feel insulted.
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Re: Seeking Advice: Dealing With Obnoxious Americans Abroad

Postby E Irizarry R&B Singer » July 1st, 2017, 5:34 pm

MrMan wrote:
E Irizarry R&B Singer wrote:
MrMan wrote:I think it's pretty common to be happy to see someone from your own country. I'd imagine a lot of blacks from the US would be especially happy to see another black American. It's a double whammy. But I've noticed that when I got really acculturated to Indonesia, knew the language, had friends and a social network, I didn't care as much if I met an American there. But when I didn't know the language, it was a bigger deal........

See, Mr. Man, you relegated it to black Americans.

No I didn't. I said it was pretty common, and I'd imagine a lot of black Americans would be especially happy to see a fellow black American. See the quote above.

Come to think of it, when I was in college, I had a conversation with a black friend of mine who'd spent a little time in Japan. He was learning Japanese in college, and got a chance to practice there. But even so, he said if you saw someone from the US, that was a big deal, and you were happy to see each other. And if he saw another black American, he was especially happy.


Au contraire!
Where shall I begin? I, personally, loathe situations, abroad or domestic, where Black Americans haven't recalibrated their "blackdar" and always pick me up within their scope by that "elongated `he looks Black but he looks Hispanic too` stare". That annoys the livid hell out of me. I even get that here in the Bay Area daily. Weirdos. They think you have to look `indigenous` or mestizo of Caucasian & American-continental Indian in order to be Hispanic or Latino (yes there are differences between the two aforementioned). Every now and then, I would be the 'brunt of societal blows' when non-Blacks whom are Americanized become astounded that I am not "the caricature" although I have a little swagger that would make them think of me in contrast.

I'm not being indignant here; I'm just manifesting/paraphrasing off of your last post/reply.
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Re: Seeking Advice: Dealing With Obnoxious Americans Abroad

Postby E Irizarry R&B Singer » July 1st, 2017, 5:40 pm

MrMan wrote:
Contrarian Expatriate wrote:
E Irizarry R&B Singer wrote:
MrMan wrote:I think it's pretty common to be happy to see someone from your own country. I'd imagine a lot of blacks from the US would be especially happy to see another black American. It's a double whammy. But I've noticed that when I got really acculturated to Indonesia, knew the language, had friends and a social network, I didn't care as much if I met an American there. But when I didn't know the language, it was a bigger deal........

See, Mr. Man, you relegated it to black Americans. ConEx's dilemma is a cultural-nationality one, not a subgenre one. He feels that both the white and black American he encountered were beyond annoying and of paltry use to him. As LadiSlav said a year or so ago, "why do we have to hyphenate Americans? We are all Americans. The rest of the world looks at us as such.".

Nicely put..... MrMan is a victim of conventional thinking so I don't expect any less from him. The expat who isolates himself with other expats is someone to avoid abroad where locals and other international people can enrich your life far greater.


When I have lived in Indonesian, I've made Indonesian friends. I talk with them in Indonesian. My wife is Indonesian. I got adopted in as a member of one of the tribes over there. I have a family name. I occasionally wear a bit of the cultural garb (a cloth on your shoulder while you wear a suit or batik.

But I keep up some contact with the expat community, too, not just Americans, but other expats. I don't do the 'expat bubble' thing. I've always worked with local employees.

For new expats who don't speak the language, it is normal to seek some social interaction with someone they can communicate with and relate to. That's a normal thing, and not an immoral thing. For myself personally, if I see some other white person from the US walking around in the mall, I don't generally feel a compulsive urge to strike up a conversation. I might be only slightly more likely to strike up a conversation than I would with a local stranger. But if I met a young newbie expat who wanted to talk or wanted help, I would try to be friendly.

Fair enough. I appreciate and accept that you respect their local culture and fully-immerse yourself within it. I always bellow out preaching that.
It's time to expatriate to evade your fate; it's time to expatriate before the barn door permanently closes on "US" sheep.
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Re: Seeking Advice: Dealing With Obnoxious Americans Abroad

Postby E Irizarry R&B Singer » July 1st, 2017, 5:47 pm

Contrarian Expatriate wrote:
MrMan wrote:For new expats who don't speak the language, it is normal to seek some social interaction with someone they can communicate with and relate to. That's a normal thing, and not an immoral thing. For myself personally, if I see some other white person from the US walking around in the mall, I don't generally feel a compulsive urge to strike up a conversation. I might be only slightly more likely to strike up a conversation than I would with a local stranger. But if I met a young newbie expat who wanted to talk or wanted help, I would try to be friendly.

...........Finally, per-incident indicators are very valid red flags for me so I pay attention to them and shun or reject accordingly. This has served me quite well in my travels to over 100 countries.

20+ countries for me, but I might get my numbers back up by "reverting to the game" starting next year.

I am fed up with Latin America because Latin America sucked a lot of paper out of me, and I only plan to return to a town in southern Mexico and Argentina. If the next Lat-Am experience sucks, then i'm 86ing it. Seriously. The rest of Latin America I don't care for; it's too classist with racism not far behind in the stretch. Too stoically-conservative in most cases towards "ajenos/extrañjeros". Even Brazil has been inoculated by that mess. Poor Brasileirinhas being beggards and choosey too. GOH with that! The only people whom treated me well in Brazil that I didn't pay for their services to be rendered were White Argentines (met in Salvador da Bahia, Brasil) whom hardly spoke English and we got along famously in Spanish. They speak it very clearly with moderate speed so the conversation was fluid. Argentines are free-loving so I was making out with one of the White Argentine's girlfriends a bit. In Brazil, I met colored Argentines whom tried to diss my Spanish (typical. That's what coons of all White-powered societies do. Such paupers.)

I will go on sojourns to Europe beginning next year or the year after. I need to get sick of the U.S. of Gay again although I'm readjusting alright here because NorCal has always, for the most part, been amicable towards me despite the hyperinflation and cost of living.
It's time to expatriate to evade your fate; it's time to expatriate before the barn door permanently closes on "US" sheep.
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