Before you marry a foreign woman, listen to this

Discussion for marriage-minded members seeking foreign brides for marriage and serious long-term relationships.
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jamesbond
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Before you marry a foreign woman, listen to this

Post by jamesbond »

If your thinking about marrying a foreign woman, listen to this episode from Tom Leykis where a caller calls in and tells us what happened to him after he married a Chinese woman and brought her back to the US.

"When I think about the idea of getting involved with an American woman, I don't know if I should laugh .............. or vomit!"

"Trying to meet women in America is like trying to decipher Egyptian hieroglyphics."
momopi
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Post by momopi »

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have2fly
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Post by have2fly »

That's exactly why you should MARRY and LIVE abroad with your wife! Don't sponsor anybody.

WOW, I just remembered, when you sign a petition to bring a foreign wife here, you have to sign Affidavit of Support. That document legally binds you to support that person and her/your kids no matter what happens!!! Even if she divorces you and goes to live on her own, you have to support her financially! It is a nightmare and many girls learn that very quickly.

Yeah, they DO get Americanized very quickly. Also, this guy is very kind and nice, so he thought he found a nice and kind girl. Beeeep! WRONG! Are all foreign girls GUARANTEED to be awesome, kind and caring??? HELL NO! There are cheaters, bitches and gold-diggers all over the world. Just be smart, live a few years abroad dating her before even considering getting married! But rather stay abroad, find a girl who owns a house or an apartment, teach English, make her work some job and there you go - you got it - good life, good wife, decent family and no worries about someone taking advantage of you.
keius
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Post by keius »

Well duh, he should've found out about the gambling before getting married. Compulsive gamblings as big an issue as being alcoholic. It's got nothing to do with being Chinese....it's about how they were raised. And it's just the case that many many Chinese are raised in environments of casual gambling.

In my case, it's my wife who watches me and makes sure i don't fall into the gambling trap. She also makes sure i never drink too much. So yes, i was somewhat of a gambler myself. And i was somewhat of a heavy drinker at one point. I've got too much willpower to allow these things to destroy my marriage. And yes, she's Chinese, sponsored from China.
So there are the good and the bad. The thing about getting a foreign bride
is that YOU get to choose from quite a large pool of perspective mates.
Just try not to FK it up :)

All i have to say is, don't let the looks deceive you. This guy pretty much admitted he was following his cock instead of his common sense.
djfourmoney
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Post by djfourmoney »

I don't agree with Foreign Women being corrupted by US Media and Culture. I detect no change in several people I have talked too. They still believe the vast majority of Americans are miss-informed, un-informed, ignorant and proud to be so. So how is this sponsoring? A Hungarian girl I was dating took me to a used clothing store. She drove a new Jetta, she liked shopping their.

The problems is this -

While people are influenced by American Media, not EVERYBODY BELIEVES what they are told, otherwise this FORUM wouldn't exist and that goes for women as well.

So as my instructor in A+ says, everybody likes to talk about the negatives and not the positives. So basically you're siding with those that would denounce us for dating and marrying foreign women but don't know it.

Don't fall for the trap that people's mistake of brining them here caused problems. Not every marriage of a Foreign Woman and an American Man, return to America will end in failure and frankly MOST DON'T.
well-informed
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Post by well-informed »

American Women marrying American Men = 50% divorce

Foreign Women marrying American Men = 20% divorce

There's always a risk with marrying women, but the numbers don't lie. Foreign women are the safer choice :)
keius
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Post by keius »

have2fly wrote:That's exactly why you should MARRY and LIVE abroad with your wife! Don't sponsor anybody.

WOW, I just remembered, when you sign a petition to bring a foreign wife here, you have to sign Affidavit of Support. That document legally binds you to support that person and her/your kids no matter what happens!!! Even if she divorces you and goes to live on her own, you have to support her financially! It is a nightmare and many girls learn that very quickly.

Yeah, they DO get Americanized very quickly. Also, this guy is very kind and nice, so he thought he found a nice and kind girl. Beeeep! WRONG! Are all foreign girls GUARANTEED to be awesome, kind and caring??? HELL NO! There are cheaters, bitches and gold-diggers all over the world. Just be smart, live a few years abroad dating her before even considering getting married! But rather stay abroad, find a girl who owns a house or an apartment, teach English, make her work some job and there you go - you got it - good life, good wife, decent family and no worries about someone taking advantage of you.
The affidavit of Support is legally binding and can be BUT won't always be used against you, UNTIL she/he becomes a US citizen. Once they become citizens, the affidavit means nothing.
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have2fly
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Post by have2fly »

The affidavit of Support is legally binding and can be BUT won't always be used against you, UNTIL she/he becomes a US citizen. Once they become citizens, the affidavit means nothing.
Oh yeah? Guess what, it takes about 4-5 years to get U.S. citizenship. And guess what? The marriage could be fked up in one year! Also she is not required to become U.S. citizen, so it's not that easy!
I don't agree with Foreign Women being corrupted by US Media and Culture. I detect no change in several people I have talked too
IT'S A COMPLETE LIE!!! People do change! Trust me, I've seen hundreds of Russian-East European girls change on my own eyes. Damn, even my ex changed so badly after she married some American guy. After being so devoted, feminine and loving she turned to be bitchy, greedy and selfish. Now she doesn't know what she wants, where as before she wanted a good family and take care of the husband. No more! She CHANGED not for good.

I DO agree that SOME don't change, but no matter what, you have to adjust to life in the U.S. And just think about it - if you were kind and caring person in your country - what happens after you move and live in the U.S. acting nice and kind? Americans will take advantage of you or just laugh at you for being nice - like people laughed at me when I moved cuz I was kind and caring. If you want to succeed in America, you have to grow thick skin and become self-supporting selfish individual, that's the only way of survival. As one guy told me once "if you want to swim with sharks, you have to become one".
djfourmoney
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Post by djfourmoney »

Adjusting to American Culture and Changing your Personality are two different things. If you flashed the cash to any woman potentially your mate, is problematic at best.

As to the Shark Tank analogy, I agree but only just. As I said most non-Americans think Americans are nuts. They move here especially places like California for the weather, people and opportunities.

As I said my friends haven't adjusted to American Culture negatively. I can't fully speak for Eastern Europeans or those from Poor Countries. Frankly I find those unions problematic unless great care is taking to investigate their deepest desires. But what happens is men used to not taking successfully are on unfamiliar ground when a attractive woman gives them the attention they have been lacking.

I still say more often than not is the woman didn't change when she got here, you didn't notice who she was to start with and missed it. The most aggressive wait two years for their Green Card, others just "Outgrow" the relationship.
momopi
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Post by momopi »

djfourmoney wrote:Adjusting to American Culture and Changing your Personality are two different things. If you flashed the cash to any woman potentially your mate, is problematic at best.
As to the Shark Tank analogy, I agree but only just. As I said most non-Americans think Americans are nuts. They move here especially places like California for the weather, people and opportunities.
Folks who can afford to move to CA for the weather tend to be older and financially well off. My RE agent here in CA is doing well with foreign buyers looking for winter getaways. This week alone he had 3 Canadian customers looking for winter homes. Others come from far-away places in Europe and Asia. In Las Vegas, 51% of homes sold in Jan 2011 were all cash transactions, many of which were outside investors. I've been told that some of the buyers only intend to live in their winter homes for 3-6 months out of the year, leaving the house vacant and in need of property management for rest of the year. If anyone is looking for a job or place to stay, consider getting into property management and house setting services. Empty homes invites squatters, and evictions can take months.

In rural areas of Taiwan and South Korea, some lower-class men have the mentality that they're buying a mailing order bride (from Vietnam or nearby countries) and that she is property (like cattle). Men in the US tend to have better attitudes about it, though I still encounter Vietnamese guys who thinks importing a bribe from Vietnam is a good thing because she "doesn't know what an ATM or credit card is". It's a rather pathetic and naive mentality. I can already guess that the guy is going to fly to Vietnam and get the best looking teenager from the line-up regardless of compatibility or suitability as a wife. X_X The more level-headed Viet guys fly there and meet potential spouse through proper introduction, then spend 1-2 years in courtship getting to know each other before marriage.
wallstreeterwww
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Post by wallstreeterwww »

well-informed wrote:American Women marrying American Men = 50% divorce

Foreign Women marrying American Men = 20% divorce

There's always a risk with marrying women, but the numbers don't lie. Foreign women are the safer choice :)
Where did you get those stats at? I can understand the 50% rate for american women (probably closer to 65% lol),but 20% for foreign women? Can anyone verify this?
zboy1
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Post by zboy1 »

This is why you don't bring foreign women into the United States and other Anglo Saxon countries. They become selfish and nasty.
djfourmoney
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Post by djfourmoney »

zboy1 wrote:This is why you don't bring foreign women into the United States and other Anglo Saxon countries. They become selfish and nasty.
So you believe that hype?

Again I still say the women were hoes, gold-diggers, whatever before they got here. I know of a story where a guy married a Russian Woman who refused him sexual contact and basically only screwed him to keep him quiet. Sexual contact or lack thereof is not a complete science but for men that find themselves troubled to get laid even when presented with an opportunity, this presents all sort of false signals for interest from the woman.

C'mon man haven't seen some of the guys that go on these tours? Not to talk trash or anything but its easy to understand why some men are -

a) Divorced from the only women that said yes

b) Didn't get laid much before, during or after the marriage

These are easy prey for the type of women that are looking for Green Card targets.

As I've said here and elsewhere you expect the same thing out of a woman in another country as you do in your home country. In fact you should expect things to pay off much faster OUTSIDE of America.

All to often men ignore easy to read signs and then blame the women for "changing" on them when the women never changed at all, her true colors just came to the fore.

Seems some of you guys wanna poo-poo bringing your girl back here, but Winston didn't and look at his problems. Its all relative...
Adama
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Post by Adama »

I'm mostly with DJ on this one. However I would still remain vigilant.

I have known a couple of Polish women who came over when they were 16 and only dated Polish guys. They still seemed pretty un-American to me, despite knowing the Femsprache (English) fairly well. I was also told that they found American women to be "aggressive", but I take that to mean loud and unfeminine. It would have been negative if the word "strong" had been used rather than "aggressive." To me things still look good. These girls were around 23 at the time.

Hardly enough for a full case study though.

I really do think that the women who "Americanize" fully were already Americanized to begin with. For example, bringing a woman to the states from a Caribbean island, Guyana, (Britain or even Hong Kong), would probably be a disaster, since these places are mostly already feminized, just women lack the financial opportunities they do here. Or they were just whores. I know a guy who said each of his Singaporean ex-GFs Americanized upon entry to the US/Canada. After asking him some follow-up questions, he revealed that he basically slept with each of these women on the first day. To me, that reads more like "slut with new cock urge" rather than Americanization.

YMMV
sea_dragon
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Post by sea_dragon »

Unless if your family is Asian, this is likely to happen even if you stay in Asia. Most Chinese are usually dead set in their ways, which is a plus because it means more resistance to the toxic American culture.
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