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I didn't have luck in China, where should I try next?

Discuss culture, living, traveling, relocating, dating or anything related to the Asian countries - China, The Philippines, Thailand, etc.

Moderators: jamesbond, fschmidt

Postby xiongmao » Mon May 21, 2012 10:08 am

Women are everywhere in China, but they take a bit more looking for than they do in Thailand or the Philippines.

My hotel's doorman in Hubei Prov was after some foreign currency off me. I'm sure he would have been able to introduce me to every single lady in town (for a price of course).

My Chinese friend made a bit of a fool of herself in front of her English teacher apparently. Maybe his morals were too high lol. By the way, we're not talking kids teachers here - we're talking about 30yo+ women..

My friend married his student and they've been married for 30 years now.
In February 2013 I quit my boring job and now I'm Happier Abroad...
Do YOU want to date beautiful foreign women? Find out which country's women are best for you, and which dating site to look for them on!
Plus, if you like Asian girls, then check out my free Asian dating site.
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Postby Magic » Mon May 21, 2012 10:24 am

Anyway, the only guys who will have an easy time getting women in china are the ones who are young, tall, and good looking. Otherwise, you won't have much luck.

Half of the western foreigners I knew got no women at all or were only able to get p4p. Several of them complained about not being able to get Chinese women and one of them said he had a much easier time getting women in America than in China.

Out of the other half, most of them were only able to get less attractive chinese women. In fact, I only knew two westerners in China who were able to get attractive chinese women. One of them was a good looking 25 year old 6'2 blond caucasian, the other was a really good looking 6'0 ABC who could speak mandarin fluently. They were both very outgoing on top of all that.

There were also quite a few young, tall, good looking westerners there with women who would be considered pretty homely by chinese standards, though average by american standards.

So when I see guys on here talk about how "all you have to do is show up in China if you're white" you can not imagine how strange it is to read something like that.
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Postby xiongmao » Thu May 24, 2012 2:14 pm

Well I'm only 5' 6", that's not a problem because I can just date the petite girls.

It depends where Westerners go. Shanghai and the East Coast is rubbish. Better hunting grounds are the center and the south. Guangzhou and Shenzhen are awesome.

Age is another factor. Once you're 30+ then you can date the legions of Christmas cake ladies. And divorced ladies/single moms are another way to find hot Chinese women. I met a guy who married an older Chinese mom, she was smoking hot. Same goes for my ex's mom.

It is hard work to date the hottest women in China, harder than it would be in the Philippines. On the other hand a 6 in China is a 9 back in the USA/UK. Every Chinese girl I've dated has had an awesome figure.

It's really not worth marrying a 10 anyway. They're good arm candy for a while, but you're better off marrying an average girl (in any country).

Obviously money attracts girls like nothing else, but not all Chinese women marry for money. I dated two very wealthy women - one was self made, the other had a rich daddy.

I wonder how Winston's getting on with all those Chinese women he was chatting to :?:
In February 2013 I quit my boring job and now I'm Happier Abroad...
Do YOU want to date beautiful foreign women? Find out which country's women are best for you, and which dating site to look for them on!
Plus, if you like Asian girls, then check out my free Asian dating site.
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Postby Magic » Thu May 24, 2012 4:02 pm

Speaking of older Chinese women, there seems to be the belief on this forum that once a woman is over 30 in China, men will no longer want them. I've seen that in older threads on here. Based on my experiences living in China, this is not true at all.

The girl I dated while I was in China was 38 when she dumped me. She was not one of those "smoking hot" 30+ women either. She looked older than her age, had bad teeth, had a very noticeable double chin and was ugly and overweight by Chinese standards. Like I said, a 2/10 in China and a 4/10 in the west. Yet she was able to get with a younger, good looking, tall, and successful Chinese man very shortly after dumping me, and he married her. I don't even know how or where she met him seeing how she didn't leave the apartment much, didn't have many friends, and had poor social skills.

These 30+ single women in China are either single by choice or just have really really high standards.
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Postby ethan_sg » Thu May 24, 2012 5:41 pm

I wouldn't say Chinese girls are loose, a small minority of them sleep around quite a bit but the majority are more conservative sexually, which really is a good thing if and when you're looking for a reliable and steady long term partner.

They tend to take their relationships seriously and don't get so overwhelmed by their libido that they sleep with every half decent looking guy that comes knocking on their door.

Chinese girls are great relationship material. If you're looking for one night stands, you're better off in Thailand or Philippines. Great if you're on a sexual conquest but you wouldn't want a real sexual libertine girl as your long term relationship partner. Not me at least.

Yes Thai and Filipino girls are easier to bed and far looser sexually but I'm not really physically attracted to them, I think Chinese women are far more elegant and attractive. They have much better skin, tighter bodies and their more conservative style makes them more feminine. I don't really get turned on by girls who are too overtly sexual and just come onto you so readily, and I've experienced that with many Thai and Filipino girls.

Depends on what you're looking for and depends on your taste I guess. I will say though that the vast majority of white foreigners that I know in China are at least in some sort of a relationship with a Chinese girl. In many cases it's English teachers hooking up with Chinese students. Looks do still matter to some extent of course, the reality is that hideously ugly people are going to have a hard time getting girls anywhere.
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Postby MrPeabody » Thu May 24, 2012 8:50 pm

Rock wrote:
Winston wrote:
xiongmao wrote:I'm sceptical of stories about any foreign English teacher who can't score in China. One of the Chinese girls I met confessed to me that she was in love with her English teacher. I'm sure half the class were - it's very common. OK so she wasn't a model, but she was good enough.

I don't really know who to believe online. I once belonged to a board where one of the members faked his own death :eek: .


Isn't that a moot point? An English teacher can't date his students. It's considered unethical and unprofessional, at least in most countries, including China. So what does it matter if your students are admiring you? You have better chances with another teacher at your school.


Dude, who cares if its considered unethical and unprofessional. U think most western English teachers in places like China or Thai think about that? If there is a connection between English teacher and adult student in one of those schools, more likely than not, something will happen between them. We're talking about China of 2012, not 1985!


When you go oversees, you are going through a lot of sacrifice to meet women and end your loneliness. The best place to meet quality women will be in your classes (if you are teaching adults). You are out of the PC United States, so you can actually be a human being and meet people without artificial restrictions. Your other alternatives will be sleazy bars, pay-for-play, and other unhealthy environments. Women see a teacher as an authority figure and the ones who like you will become naturally seduced just by seeing you perform. No silly PUA necessary. I learned this as a graduate assistant in college where a female student approached me unsolicited and arranged all the details for the date. When I was teaching classes during my CELTA training, several Thai women gave me their e-mail addresses after the class was over. For example, one lady gave me a thank you card with her e-mail address. This is a simple way for someone to make contact in Thai culture. Depending on the culture, you may not want to date someone while she is still in your class
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Postby ethan_sg » Fri May 25, 2012 1:26 am

I actually just visited a good American friend of mine in Nanchang, Jiangxi (China) who's teaching English there.

I met like 6 western male English teachers in Nanchang. Literally 5 of them were dating students they had taught before (but admittedly are not currently teaching) while the other was dating a Chinese colleague.

This sample size is of course not very large but this is one of many examples I've seen of Western English teachers dating quite freely in China.

To my surprise, these English teachers (who're teaching at Universities) actually told me that there is no formal rule against dating your students. None of them ever got into trouble for it. Policy could be different elsewhere of course but I'm just sharing what I saw.

Winston wrote:
Rock wrote:
Winston wrote:
xiongmao wrote:I'm sceptical of stories about any foreign English teacher who can't score in China. One of the Chinese girls I met confessed to me that she was in love with her English teacher. I'm sure half the class were - it's very common. OK so she wasn't a model, but she was good enough.

I don't really know who to believe online. I once belonged to a board where one of the members faked his own death :eek: .


Isn't that a moot point? An English teacher can't date his students. It's considered unethical and unprofessional, at least in most countries, including China. So what does it matter if your students are admiring you? You have better chances with another teacher at your school.


Dude, who cares if its considered unethical and unprofessional. U think most western English teachers in places like China or Thai think about that? If there is a connection between English teacher and adult student in one of those schools, more likely than not, something will happen between them. We're talking about China of 2012, not 1985!


You can do that. But then you'll get fired. Most teachers don't date their students. You try it and see what happens.

Every generation thinks it is more sexually liberated than in the past. That's a perception myth. People in 1985 also said, "Dude this is 1985, not 1960!"

In 1800, they also said, "Dude, this is 1800, not 1780!"

In Ancient Greece, Socrates also said that the young generation of his time was more rebellious and arrogant than youth in the older generation was. Go figure.
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Postby ExpeditionSailor » Fri May 25, 2012 2:43 am

I've put up my profile on Date in Asia and tried contacting a few Chinese women as an experiment. They will look at my profile but
not send me a reply. A few from Thailand have responded, mostly single mothers. Pulling Filipinas is no problem, but can you trust
any of them?

Lately I've been thinking I might be better off going to Thailand to teach English and see if I can get a wife or GF that way.

I could be aiming too high, but on the other hand, a lot of the Chinese women on DIA are very attractive. It's actually hard to find one that's
relatively homely.

I know I'm ugly, probably hideously so. Here's a pic of me:

http://www.flickr.com/photos/syncflash/7259645474/in/photostream

Here's a pic of one of the Chinese women I approached:

Image
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Postby xiongmao » Fri May 25, 2012 6:08 pm

Ah, you look fine, no worse than me.

You need to work on thinking alpha not beta. Chinese women need to know who's in charge. It's just a confidence thing really.

Check out the 35-45 yo Chinese women online. Chinese Love Links is good, as is China Love Match. DIA is hit and miss but in time you get to recognise the women from other sites. I've got my own dating site (in sig) but I haven't signed up many Chinese women yet.

You'd be a good match for one of my ex's moms, she was seriously hot but shame I fell out with her daughter.

This DIA girl looks a lot like one of my ex's. Actually I'm still friends with her and she's translating my site into Chinese:

Image

I once went on a blind date with a women who looked like this:

Image

Wow, she was the hottest woman I've ever met, too bad she turned me into a gibbering wreck and I blew my chances.

My current on/off Chinese gf looks a lot like her:

Image

This woman's Filipina though.

You'll generally find that good English speaking ladies can set their sights a lot higher - the best Chinese moms are on Chnlove or Asian Beauties but they're expensive sites to use.

Teaching English in China is well paid and it's not too hard to find work especially you have a degree and a good English/American speaking voice.
In February 2013 I quit my boring job and now I'm Happier Abroad...
Do YOU want to date beautiful foreign women? Find out which country's women are best for you, and which dating site to look for them on!
Plus, if you like Asian girls, then check out my free Asian dating site.
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Postby Jester » Fri May 25, 2012 11:00 pm

Winston wrote:
xiongmao wrote:I'm sceptical of stories about any foreign English teacher who can't score in China. One of the Chinese girls I met confessed to me that she was in love with her English teacher. I'm sure half the class were - it's very common. OK so she wasn't a model, but she was good enough.

I don't really know who to believe online. I once belonged to a board where one of the members faked his own death :eek: .


Isn't that a moot point? An English teacher can't date his students. It's considered unethical and unprofessional, at least in most countries, including China. So what does it matter if your students are admiring you? You have better chances with another teacher at your school.


Winston, Winston, Winston........

{shaking head}
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Postby Jester » Fri May 25, 2012 11:06 pm

Winston wrote:
....white guys BS about the following:

- They spent shitloads of money, even for the smallest things.
- They make shitloads of money from their job or investments.
- They get casual sex from every girl they go out with, within three dates.
- Every girl they know wants to have casual sex with them.
- The majority of women have casual sex outside of relationships (they don't, only a minority do).
- Every other guy they know is doing the same as above.

However, if you use basic logic, the above can't be true for all or most guys because:

- If dating and casual sex were that easy, then prostitution would be out of business. All the bars in Thailand/Philippines would be out of business too.
- If dates were that easy to get, then dating sites would be unnecessary and would not be the cash cow that they are. Thousands of successful dating sites would have no business or traffic.


You are proselytizing for cold hard logic over idiot-like Keanu-Reeves-like optimism.

Let's try an experiment.

You like experiments, right?

For one week, YU do all the things that you say white people do.

Brag.
Exaggerate.
Make everything sound easy.
Ignore obstacles.
Pretend everything is easy.

Ad blog about it on HA daily.

Let's test find out what works best in RL.

Are we on?
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Postby Jester » Fri May 25, 2012 11:11 pm

gsjackson wrote:
Winston wrote:
Every generation thinks it is more sexually liberated than in the past. That's a perception myth. People in 1985 also said, "Dude this is 1985, not 1960!"


Oh, I promise you Winston that -- let's take the pre-AIDS year of 1980 instead of 1985, but 1985 would work too -- was vastly, vastly more sexually liberated than 1960. I was there for both. In almost every conceivable manner of individual behavior, things were much looser in 1980 than 1960. The pill coming along circa 1960 had a lot to do with it, of course.

The difference between 1960 and the world we live in today you can't even comprehend, unless you go back and look at videos like Breakfast at Tiffany's.


Well-stated. I had to WORK to get a girl into bed back in the 70's. Now they just "hook up".

Lazy whippersnappers.
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Postby Jester » Fri May 25, 2012 11:21 pm

xiongmao wrote:It is hard work to date the hottest women in China, harder than it would be in the Philippines. On the other hand a 6 in China is a 9 back in the USA/UK. Every Chinese girl I've dated has had an awesome figure.


6 in China

= 9 in USA/UK

= ?? in Phil's

Inquiring minds want to know
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Postby Jester » Fri May 25, 2012 11:25 pm

MrPeabody wrote:When you go oversees, you are going through a lot of sacrifice to meet women and end your loneliness. The best place to meet quality women will be in your classes (if you are teaching adults). You are out of the PC United States, so you can actually be a human being and meet people without artificial restrictions. Your other alternatives will be sleazy bars, pay-for-play, and other unhealthy environments. Women see a teacher as an authority figure and the ones who like you will become naturally seduced just by seeing you perform. No silly PUA necessary. I learned this as a graduate assistant in college where a female student approached me unsolicited and arranged all the details for the date. When I was teaching classes during my CELTA training, several Thai women gave me their e-mail addresses after the class was over. For example, one lady gave me a thank you card with her e-mail address. This is a simple way for someone to make contact in Thai culture. Depending on the culture, you may not want to date someone while she is still in your class


Winston, the forum needs to have a THANKS button, like RooshVForum. Also a LIKE button, like FB.
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Postby Jester » Fri May 25, 2012 11:35 pm

ExpeditionSailor wrote:I've put up my profile on Date in Asia and tried contacting a few Chinese women as an experiment. They will look at my profile but
not send me a reply. A few from Thailand have responded, mostly single mothers. Pulling Filipinas is no problem, but can you trust
any of them?

Lately I've been thinking I might be better off going to Thailand to teach English and see if I can get a wife or GF that way.

I could be aiming too high, but on the other hand, a lot of the Chinese women on DIA are very attractive. It's actually hard to find one that's
relatively homely.

I know I'm ugly, probably hideously so. Here's a pic of me:

http://www.flickr.com/photos/syncflash/7259645474/in/photostream

Here's a pic of one of the Chinese women I approached:

Image


Good for you posting a pic.

Not bad looking at all for age.

Good actually.

problem is the pic doesnt SAY anything.

Chinese people are all about IMAGE.

They think in pictures.

Do a big favor for an intelligent, artistic buddy, then collect by having him take pics of you ding things you like, either outdoors or in interesting surroundings indoors. In a tuxedo with two young women on your arms. Chopping wood outside a cabin. Standing on a hill in hiking gear. Standing by your car. Whatever.

Then try spamming girls again/

One more tip:

Women are too intellectually lazy to read profiles. Treat each email as the only thing she'll read. Flirt, flirt, flirt. Stand out.
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