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I didn't have luck in China, where should I try next?

Discuss culture, living, traveling, relocating, dating or anything related to the Asian countries - China, The Philippines, Thailand, etc.

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Postby xiongmao » Sat May 26, 2012 1:56 pm

It's a numbers game as well. Last time I visited China the month before was like a military operation on Chinese Love Links. I contacted dozens of girls, got snubbed loads (well who cares because they're all still single and man-less), talked to a few crazies, screened out all the golddiggers/lazy types and ended up with 4 great girls to visit (and girl 2 was so good I didn't actually meet the other 2).

A 6 in China is probably a 7 in the Philippines. All I've seen of Filipinas are the ones in HK (not great), but on the other hand the Filipinas registering for my new site are pretty darned hot. They can't all be using stolen photos of Indonesian actresses.

Who cares about any of this anyway, because there are a lot of men with Asian (Thai/Chinese/Filipino) wives in my town here in the UK and these guys have all got decent looking women (and often have very cute babies as well). There's one guy who lives near me - he's pretty average but his Chinese wife is a 10.
In February 2013 I quit my boring job and now I'm Happier Abroad...
Do YOU want to date beautiful foreign women? Find out which country's women are best for you, and which dating site to look for them on!
Plus, if you like Asian girls, then check out my free Asian dating site.
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Postby Jester » Sat May 26, 2012 7:44 pm

xiongmao wrote:It's a numbers game as well. Last time I visited China the month before was like a military operation on Chinese Love Links. I contacted dozens of girls, got snubbed loads (well who cares because they're all still single and man-less), talked to a few crazies, screened out all the golddiggers/lazy types and ended up with 4 great girls to visit (and girl 2 was so good I didn't actually meet the other 2).

A 6 in China is probably a 7 in the Philippines. All I've seen of Filipinas are the ones in HK (not great), but on the other hand the Filipinas registering for my new site are pretty darned hot. They can't all be using stolen photos of Indonesian actresses.

Who cares about any of this anyway, because there are a lot of men with Asian (Thai/Chinese/Filipino) wives in my town here in the UK and these guys have all got decent looking women (and often have very cute babies as well). There's one guy who lives near me - he's pretty average but his Chinese wife is a 10.


OK, joined your site. Nice and easy to sign up.

So it seems that it only shows me matches that meet my age requirements, and for whom I also meet theirs?

Excellent.

Too bad no Chinese to compare.
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Postby Jester » Sat May 26, 2012 7:48 pm

xiongmao wrote:It's a numbers game as well. Last time I visited China the month before was like a military operation on Chinese Love Links. I contacted dozens of girls, got snubbed loads (well who cares because they're all still single and man-less), talked to a few crazies, screened out all the golddiggers/lazy types and ended up with 4 great girls to visit (and girl 2 was so good I didn't actually meet the other 2).

A 6 in China is probably a 7 in the Philippines....
... there are a lot of men with Asian (Thai/Chinese/Filipino) wives in my town here in the UK....
....There's one guy who lives near me - he's pretty average but his Chinese wife is a 10.


Guess I need to see a Chinese 10.
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Postby xiongmao » Tue May 29, 2012 9:58 am

There's one in my work. Wow. I thought she was Korean, but she's actually Chinese. She's a 10 and she knows it. There are millions of girls who look like her in China, you just gotta go out there and live for a while.
In February 2013 I quit my boring job and now I'm Happier Abroad...
Do YOU want to date beautiful foreign women? Find out which country's women are best for you, and which dating site to look for them on!
Plus, if you like Asian girls, then check out my free Asian dating site.
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Postby The_Adventurer » Wed May 30, 2012 10:39 am

Anyone who does not have luck in China is doing something very, very wrong. You need to either get out more, talk to more people, or find the right way to talk to the people you do engage with. There is no excuse for any foreigner not to get a nice, good looking girl. I saw a website, once, that appeared to be dedicated to mixed couples in Guangdong, featuring some of the ugliest African dudes you can imagine, all with hot girlfriends. There really is no excuse.

There is one caveat, though, and that may be if you're an English teacher. There are so many anti-English teacher articles on the net now that girls may be getting more wary of dating one. Enough foreigners have given English teachers a very bad name and soon it will be like Korea where simply being an English teacher will mean the end of all your chances. I have noticed that most English teachers seem to leave China, in a year or two, hating the place and writing as negatively as possible about afterwards.

I, however, am not an English teacher and I am having the time of my life. I get approached quite a bit, not by random people on the street, nor do I approach random people on the street. If, however, you shop at the same places, eat at the same places, and the girls see you enough and get used to you, those who like you will make themselves known. I have been handed post its with QQ numbers, phone numbers and all. YOu do have to be aware, though. Not many girls are forward enough to walk up and hand you a number. I found that I get "approached" more than I know. My girlfriend is often pointing out, "Did you see that? That girl did X, Y or Z. That means she wants to chase you." And I never saw it or paid attention to it.

I had two cases where girls had apparently already decided, in their mind, that we were going to have a serious relationship and when they found out about my current girlfriend they were devastated. I had no idea they were making such plans. One had even told her parents all about me. I was just being friendly and casually "hanging out", because I didn't know anyone here at the time. I had no idea they really liked me. You do have to be aware.

Here is not Philippines by any means. 60 year old pensioners are not going to get 20 year old college beauties. Guys who brag about taking all kinds of girls home are either exaggerating or those girls work in bars or KTV's and they just don't know it. Those who are not serious about potential marriage and family need not apply. Yes, there are guys who come here for fun, but I really don't recommend it. I, personally, wouldn't want to be in the same room with that type of girl, and certainly wouldn't want to be seen on the street with her. Everyone in her area will surely know what kind of girl she is and your rep will go down with hers.

I honestly don't understand how the girl described by the OP could get a boyfriend. Chinese guys are too picky. Fat balding guys think they should have a model quality girl from a good family. Me and my gf are trying to find someone for one of her friends. This girl is a tiny, tiny bit overweight, which would go unnoticed in the western world, and her face is too pretty, but no luck yet, and she's only 24, not 38 with bad teeth etc.
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Postby xiongmao » Wed May 30, 2012 11:02 am

Ha ha ha, you're right about being noticed. My girl told me the waitress in my favourite noodle bar saw me in there a couple of times. Good job I didn't go there with a different girl lol.

Also the cute assistant in her local shop wanted a Western husband. She spoke no English so it would have been hard to find this out by myself. She was also quite shy.

I think I'll get a load of business cards printed with my QQ on and hand them out to cute girls.

I've been turned down a lot of times by Chinese girls, online and offline (I went on a blind date and the woman hated me!). It's just a numbers game. Chinese women are far more picky than Filipinas. However, if a Chinese lady likes you then she'll move very fast. The downside is that of course we men are a bit slow on the uptake and we're still thinking if she's the one whereas she's already planned our wedding and come up with our kid's names.

I've also found Chinese women to be very shallow when judging other women. My first Chinese gf kept telling me my subsequent dates weren't hot enough!

I might be interested in your girls' friend though - I guess the age difference is quite big but I did date a 25yo last Autumn. My last gf was 5' 2" and a little bit chubby.

Some of my friends have heard the teacher thing too. Funny thing is it's almost entirely down to a single guy!

I saw quite a few African men in Guangzhou, many with Chinese wives/gf's. When you see the quality of the African women there, you'll understand why they go Chinese!
In February 2013 I quit my boring job and now I'm Happier Abroad...
Do YOU want to date beautiful foreign women? Find out which country's women are best for you, and which dating site to look for them on!
Plus, if you like Asian girls, then check out my free Asian dating site.
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Postby Jester » Wed May 30, 2012 9:43 pm

xiongmao wrote:The downside is that of course we men are a bit slow on the uptake and we're still thinking if she's the one whereas she's already planned our wedding and come up with our kid's names.


LOL you know women well.

Tigers... sharks.... women.

xiongmao wrote:However, if a Chinese lady likes you then she'll move very fast.


My experience too on a Mainland Chinese girl here. Liked me, bent over for me on the first date, then dropped me after next date when she found out I wasn't ready to buy a house with her. No emotions, just fun and mutual respect. Good person, knew what she wanted. No hate.

xiongmao wrote:Chinese women are far more picky than Filipinas.


This interests me a lot. Care to expound a bit?
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Postby xiongmao » Fri Jun 01, 2012 8:36 am

Yeah, Chinese women are quite picky. I've had a lot of rejections on Chinese Love Links. Usually from daddy's little princess types. To be fair though, these have often been very hot girls with fluent English and middle/upper class backgrounds, so they can afford to be picky.

By contrast, my friend told me a Filipina would marry a chair, especially if it was an American chair. My uncle's also dating a Thai woman 25 years his junior - this is less common in China, although it does happen.

Don't let this put you off Chinese girls. The thing is China's population is VAST. For every girl that turns you down there's another 10,000 to chat to. It took me about 3 minutes to get a date when I was in Guangzhou :D . Getting dates is easy when you're in a country this populous:

Image
In February 2013 I quit my boring job and now I'm Happier Abroad...
Do YOU want to date beautiful foreign women? Find out which country's women are best for you, and which dating site to look for them on!
Plus, if you like Asian girls, then check out my free Asian dating site.
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Postby Jester » Sat Jun 02, 2012 9:34 pm

xiongmao wrote:Yeah, Chinese women are quite picky. I've had a lot of rejections on Chinese Love Links. Usually from daddy's little princess types. To be fair though, these have often been very hot girls with fluent English and middle/upper class backgrounds, so they can afford to be picky.

By contrast, my friend told me a Filipina would marry a chair, especially if it was an American chair. My uncle's also dating a Thai woman 25 years his junior - this is less common in China, although it does happen.

Don't let this put you off Chinese girls. The thing is China's population is VAST. For every girl that turns you down there's another 10,000 to chat to. It took me about 3 minutes to get a date when I was in Guangzhou :D . Getting dates is easy when you're in a country this populous:

Image


Thanks.
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Postby tjh14 » Mon Jun 04, 2012 3:22 am

Anyone who does not have luck in China is doing something very, very wrong.


Amen to that. Most expats I know, including some totally bizarre have a wife or girlfriend. It's almost impossible not to have women interested in you, like picking low hanging fruit. I can't comprehend women trouble in China. The trouble is deciding which one to keep.
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Postby Blue Murder » Mon Jun 04, 2012 4:35 am

The_Adventurer wrote:Anyone who does not have luck in China is doing something very, very wrong. You need to either get out more, talk to more people, or find the right way to talk to the people you do engage with. There is no excuse for any foreigner not to get a nice, good looking girl. I saw a website, once, that appeared to be dedicated to mixed couples in Guangdong, featuring some of the ugliest African dudes you can imagine, all with hot girlfriends. There really is no excuse.

There is one caveat, though, and that may be if you're an English teacher. There are so many anti-English teacher articles on the net now that girls may be getting more wary of dating one. Enough foreigners have given English teachers a very bad name and soon it will be like Korea where simply being an English teacher will mean the end of all your chances. I have noticed that most English teachers seem to leave China, in a year or two, hating the place and writing as negatively as possible about afterwards.

I, however, am not an English teacher and I am having the time of my life. I get approached quite a bit, not by random people on the street, nor do I approach random people on the street. If, however, you shop at the same places, eat at the same places, and the girls see you enough and get used to you, those who like you will make themselves known. I have been handed post its with QQ numbers, phone numbers and all. YOu do have to be aware, though. Not many girls are forward enough to walk up and hand you a number. I found that I get "approached" more than I know. My girlfriend is often pointing out, "Did you see that? That girl did X, Y or Z. That means she wants to chase you." And I never saw it or paid attention to it.

I had two cases where girls had apparently already decided, in their mind, that we were going to have a serious relationship and when they found out about my current girlfriend they were devastated. I had no idea they were making such plans. One had even told her parents all about me. I was just being friendly and casually "hanging out", because I didn't know anyone here at the time. I had no idea they really liked me. You do have to be aware.

Here is not Philippines by any means. 60 year old pensioners are not going to get 20 year old college beauties. Guys who brag about taking all kinds of girls home are either exaggerating or those girls work in bars or KTV's and they just don't know it. Those who are not serious about potential marriage and family need not apply. Yes, there are guys who come here for fun, but I really don't recommend it. I, personally, wouldn't want to be in the same room with that type of girl, and certainly wouldn't want to be seen on the street with her. Everyone in her area will surely know what kind of girl she is and your rep will go down with hers.

I honestly don't understand how the girl described by the OP could get a boyfriend. Chinese guys are too picky. Fat balding guys think they should have a model quality girl from a good family. Me and my gf are trying to find someone for one of her friends. This girl is a tiny, tiny bit overweight, which would go unnoticed in the western world, and her face is too pretty, but no luck yet, and she's only 24, not 38 with bad teeth etc.


Shit. If you know of any girls in the 16-20 age range, lemme know.
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Postby polya » Mon Jun 11, 2012 7:09 am

Magic wrote:


I'm not in China anymore, I'm back in the states, as in permanently.

I don't think I want a filipina girlfriend. The ones interested in foreign men seem to be the gold digger type. Everyone I know that dates, has dated, or got married to a filipina seem to tell me the same story. They spend almost all of their spare money on the filipina or sending it to her family members. Some don't seem to mind and some are desperate enough to do it. But for me personally, I do not want this. I want a woman that is somewhat financially independent. I don't mind helping her out, but I'm not going to be a woman's personal ATM machine. Been there, done that. I asked one of my friends who married a filipina once, and he outright told me "most of your money will go to her and her family, if you're not willing to do this don't date one."

I was on that dating website before too. It's full of scammers and flakey women.


It sounds like you answered the "where to next question" - the USA. Why didn't you try another Chinese city - you could have got a job & moved your possessions easier than coming back to the USA? Anyway, China isn't a guaranteed place to marry. Many Chinesemen will never marry due to the woman shortage.
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Postby xiongmao » Mon Jun 11, 2012 6:40 pm

I think a Western man is more or less guaranteed to be able to find a wife in Asia. My uncle's found a Thai girl many years his junior and he's totally skint. She ain't after his money because he doesn't have any.

Also many less well off Chinese men are simply getting mail order brides from Vietnam or the poor parts of China. I guess that still leaves many men wife-less.

None of the Chinese women Western men will see on a dating site are particularly poor though. There are plenty of rich ones as well if you want to be a kept man. These ladies are somewhat formidable though and our inferior man brains are no match for their clever scheming plans.
In February 2013 I quit my boring job and now I'm Happier Abroad...
Do YOU want to date beautiful foreign women? Find out which country's women are best for you, and which dating site to look for them on!
Plus, if you like Asian girls, then check out my free Asian dating site.
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Postby Jake51 » Thu Jun 14, 2012 7:24 pm

xiongmao wrote:Ha ha ha, you're right about being noticed. My girl told me the waitress in my favourite noodle bar saw me in there a couple of times. Good job I didn't go there with a different girl lol.

Also the cute assistant in her local shop wanted a Western husband. She spoke no English so it would have been hard to find this out by myself. She was also quite shy.

I think I'll get a load of business cards printed with my QQ on and hand them out to cute girls.

I've been turned down a lot of times by Chinese girls, online and offline (I went on a blind date and the woman hated me!). It's just a numbers game. Chinese women are far more picky than Filipinas. However, if a Chinese lady likes you then she'll move very fast. The downside is that of course we men are a bit slow on the uptake and we're still thinking if she's the one whereas she's already planned our wedding and come up with our kid's names.

I've also found Chinese women to be very shallow when judging other women. My first Chinese gf kept telling me my subsequent dates weren't hot enough!

I might be interested in your girls' friend though - I guess the age difference is quite big but I did date a 25yo last Autumn. My last gf was 5' 2" and a little bit chubby.

Some of my friends have heard the teacher thing too. Funny thing is it's almost entirely down to a single guy!

I saw quite a few African men in Guangzhou, many with Chinese wives/gf's. When you see the quality of the African women there, you'll understand why they go Chinese!


You made my laugh by writing that you plan on printing out your business cards to give out to Chinese girls. The population of China is huge, so there are lots of women. Make sure you print out many of them :-) Have a look on this page. As you can see, they can print out 5,000 business cards for what, 50 bucks. Looks like you can have it up and running in a few days :-) Good luck and let me know how it goes. Maybe that is something that we all should do :-)
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