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Discuss culture, living, traveling, relocating, dating or anything related to the Asian countries - China, The Philippines, Thailand, etc.
ok guys I'm roughly 250, 6'1, I have a stable job, I'm very attracted to filipinas, I plan on visiting for a week or two in about 4 months, I'm a member of cb, though havent bought a membership so i cannot read any emails, I have gotten like 50 emails since i made my account about 5 days ago, what should i look pout for, im 25, im not interested for p4p as i can do that in the us, my goal is to eventually find a wife. i have heard that if you flat out tell a girl that you will only support her and not her family or if they ask for money it is ok to tell them no?
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If you want to meet a girl that doesn't want to help her family that is going to be a hard find. If you look for a girl in college or one with a degree it might be a sign that her family has some money at least because college cost money. It is also a sign she has other family abroad already helping her family. Even if her parents, brothers or sisters do not need money there is always an uncle or a cousin that will. Keep that in mind when picking the girl and learn about her family some without making it obvious before you commit.
Some girls will not date a non Filipino just because of the stereotype of wanting money or a green card. If you are in your 20's it isn't bad though. The girl doesn't worry about being seen that way. At least its not obvious like looking at a couple with a 30 year age gap.
That's the way it was explained to me anyways.
I understand what you mean, I know when you marry a pinay you marry her family also, im ok with that, i dont know if its just people that have bad experiences and got scammed, I know what to look for, if i find a girl and she wants to help her family out a little, then ok but she can also get her own job, i just dont want to set myself up for failure, i have never been to another country so maybe im just psyching my self out.
I think it really does depend on who you talk to. Some guys meet scammers. Some guys don't. I have been staying with my fiance since she met me in the airport in Manila almost two months ago and things couldn't be going better for me here.
Just watch for the most common money requests sick mother, sick father and needs money for death in family. If they want money from you they will usually ask right away. In the first 5 emails or so. I had many girls ask me for money before i met the girl I am currently engaged to.
I suggest talking to as many girls as possible online and narrowing it down to a few or the one if at all possible. Then making arrangements for her to meet you on arrival. It worked well for me.
I also suggest avoiding Manila unless its just for a layover or connection flight. I've been to Davao, Cebu and Manila and Manila is just so expensive compared to the rest of the country. Davao is nice but not very many things to do. Cebu is the best of both worlds if you can get past the guys always trying to sell you viagra on the street.
If you're only visiting for a week or two, that may not be long enough. On my first visit, I spent 3 weeks there and met 2 incredible girls. One of them was 22 and looked like J. Lo, and she couldn't keep her hands off of me. On my next visit I just stayed 10 days, and didn't have time to find another great one. Anyway, good luck to you, Deuce.
Keep your money in your bank. Honestly, Filipinas are not that intelligent, if you're scammed by them then, well...
While I'm in China and not the Phillies, I live with some piss poor Western guys. They couldn't give a girl money, coz they haven't got any. But they still do well here. Just leave your money safely back at home and go and have a great time!
I quit my boring cubicle slave job and now I'm Happier Abroad...
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I'm only allowed 160 hours of vacation a year which is 4 weeks, so when i go for the first 2 weeks, i will meet people, date, make friends and connections and if I happen to meet someone or a few girl then i will go back for another 2 weeks, I'm realistic, yes i want to find a wife, but im in no big hurry, if i meet someone and it takes a year for us to go through with the whole visa proces or whatever that is fine, I'm met quite a few ladies on CB who are interesting, havnt had anyone ask for money yet, thats a rule of thumb going anywhere even in the US is to never send or give money to someone you dont know, I've been debating for 3 years on whether or not I should do this and have decided to go through with it, I'd be mad at myself in the long run for not at least trying this route to find someone, I hate talking in generalities about any woman, but I've been soured on AW far too long and am sick of the bullshit hoops we have to jump through, my last date was a month ago with a girl, who was pretty and seemed genuinely interested in but, we date for a a few weeks after of first date and when she asked how much i made and I told her she was mad because I made more then her....WTF!!! Only thing I'm nervous about is going to a foreign country that I have never been to by myself, I know they speak english but still, I do hope t hang out with some expats when im there, I wont be going there until next feb at the earliest.
What cities should i watch out for or just avoid completely, on girl I've been talking to is from santiago city, shes cute, ive seen her on cam so I know she is actually who she says she is, shes in college for nursing, i feel like a have a better connection with her then the other girls, im not putting all my eggs in one basket so to speak with her, if something comes from us talking everyday then so be it, but if not, well on to the next one.
from what I've gathered on cities to avoid it seems that Angeles City, Manilla are really the only two, what about Luzon, Isabella, Zamb. quezon.
thanks for the replies guys. Was skeptical about posting on here since some men seem bitter because they tried and treid but always get screwed, but i guess thats what happens when you dont look for signs of a scammer
Aron, You've got a great plan. Go to the Philippines for several weeks; during your first week, meet a bunch of ladies as friends first, one per day. Of course you'll also meet many more just on the street, etc. Since you are already planning a trip and make it clear to the ladies that you are going shortly, you'll tend to attract the highest quality ladies and fewer scammers. The embassies usually caution you to avoid Mindanao. What we tell our members is that if you are a "city guy" then focus on meeting people in Manila area/Cebu, whereas if you are a "country guy" then make sure to take some time to meet people in smaller cities who also have lived in the Philippines countryside. Remember, the important thing when meeting anyone for a lifelong partnership is to find people who share your values and will want to live a compatible lifestyle.
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Thanks guys, ill do city and the country, I live in a smaller town right outside I'd a massive city, being from north Hollywood I miss the city life and one day will return to a big city but small town life is peaceful. I should only meet on girl a day?
What kind of things do most of the girls like to do? Dinner, beach, etc, give me some ideas as to what there is to do,
Should I stay away from girls that already have a child? If its just one kid I don't mind as I want to have kids but I have heard once they have a child and the father isn't in the picture it is extremely hard for them to find anyone, I don't feel as if I need to rescue you them, one girl I'm talking to has a kid and the father ran out on them right before he was born. What are your guys thought?
You can find decent or bad girls anywhere, just because lets say Angeles city has a lot of bars which may not be of some people's liking doesn't mean you can't find decent girls there. In the Philippines it's a numbers game and the more girls you meet and get to know the easier it is to figure out what kind of girls you like or don't like. AC isn't really that bad a place cause in actuality all the girls would like to meet a decent foreigner and at least all the decent looking ones are already on display so you don't have to run around the country trying to find women that match your fancy. If you're smart enough then you won't fall for the scammers or liars, if your stupid or just fall for emotional BS then you'll get suckered anywhere whether its in AC or some other city.
The best girls to get with are either the youngest in the family, stay away from the oldest or older girls in the families cause they will have more responsibilities and will have to support their younger siblings. So always ask how many brothers & sisters they have. The less, the better.
Another option is to find girls where their parents are already dead, thus that solves the issue of having to deal with family.
Find girls who have been disowned by their family or their family has gotten separated and the mother and father left the kid on her own. Believe it or not this is common in PI, you will find many girls like this working the nightlife scene. The key is to find and grab them before they get too jaded with life and get sucked into the bar scene.
Hang around the university campuses or outside hang out spots around them (eating places0 and meet/talk with girls there. Some may be chatty and interested in meeting foreigners since they probably don't go out much or are from areas where there aren't many foreigners. They probably come from stable families and most likely won't be moochers or there is less probability.
Sales girls in stores and malls are usually pretty easy to chat up. Girls that have colored eye lenses, whiter looking skin and dyed hair other than black tend to have a Euro fetish so they are probably easiest to chat up and get with. There are always at least a few in every big department store or mall.
Meeting girls in bars and clubs is a numbers game. Most of the girls you meet where foreigners go will either be working girls or girls working to make some extra cash. If you go to a place with just Filipinos most girls will be in groups with friends and won't be much interested in chatting with you.
No city in Philippines is necessarily good or bad for meeting or dating local women, you just have to remember that it's all a numbers game and the bigger the city the more likely it is to have a higher concentration of better looking women if you are just randomly meeting women. Making planned arrangements on the internet one can find decent women but you have to plan ahead and hope they show up at your designated meeting area, which may or may not ever happen. Most likely if they are not near the city they may ask for transportation costs, which can be understood if they are reasonable but a newbie wouldn't know the real costs of travel in PI so might get had. Like a previous poster stated most girls aren't really that smart but most Western guys will be so desperate for female companionship that they will be thinking with their little head and that's where all the problems start to begin with.
I wouldn't get with single mothers unless you already wanted a premade family to begin with or the women already has her own money and either has a business or she is already educated and making her own money as some kind of professional. You don't need to be Santa Claus in PI as there are still many decent women who don't have kids running around. Remember you don't know the other half of the DNA the kid is made up or and he/she could be a nightmare if you decide to be the 'good guy' and marry a single mother, when in all reality you never even have to put that into consideration since there is such a huge population of young single women running around, it's not like Anglo countries where you have to grab what you can get and hope for the best. If you think the single mom is super hot or something, find out if she has younger sisters and go after them. I'm sure one of them is of age and looks just as good and doesn't have a kid to deal with yet.
Filipinas for the most part act like teens until their in their late 20's or 30's. So they can be really immature at times, but some guys like that. Depending on their education level will determine what you can do with them in regards to taking them out on the town. If they come from the province and have a shitty education or no education you can take them places but don't expect much conversation or them feeling comfortable cause they will feel out of place. You'll have a bigger conversation talking to your pet dog or cat than most Filipinas at the dinner table. You don't believe me? Go ahead and tale her to an upper class eating or hang out place where richer Filipinos go and see how she behaves.
Middle/upper class girls who are properly educated you can pretty much do whatever with them, it's just after a while they start acting like Wesstern girls in some ways, especially if they are materialistic oriented. They tend to also try to put a leash on men and will start testing the waters to see how much control she can have over you. It won't be apparent in a two week stay for example, but if you were with her over months she would put the clamps on you slowly without you realizing it or if you do and don't put a stop to it it will just keep increasing until you might as well be married or have a Western GF.
The educated middle/upper Filipinas aren't actually that much different than Western women other than they act and appear more feminine and may have more conservative type values than Western women. I think this is why many older Western guys just would rather go with a good looking simple Filipina from the province or city. Even though she may not be educated much or be worldly, she is much easier to deal with and not as much drama BS. But then again she won't be much of a conversationalist and other things that go along with that deficiency but if you just want companionship and someone who can take care of the house and any future kids and you can be the main money maker in the family then you don't need the headache of the higher classes/educated Filipina, it may just be more of a headache or just the same as a Western woman.
I like the Visayas area for Filipinas, check out the cities around the middle part of Philippine islands (Cebu, Iloilo, Bacolod). Also Southern Luzon is okay like Naga city area. if you like Big round eyes like Bambi eyes, for some reason a lot of girls in Bicol area of PI have the genetic propensity for that in comparison to other parts of the country. I'm not really into slanty Asian eyes so more rounder big eyes with a slight oriental look are very attractive in my opinion. My kid's mother is from that area and now my kid inherited natural big eyes so it makes her look very attractive and like a doll, or the way Japanese animation makes over sized eyes on women and girls, that's how my kid's eyes are but they are natural. If you are white it makes a good combo look on for a child, especially a girl.
"The object of life is not to be on the side of the majority but to escape finding oneself in the ranks of the insane." Marcus Aurelius, Roman Emperor and stoic philosopher, 121-180 A.D.
Your money might attract a gold digger that is not remotely attracted to you. If that floats your boat than go for it. If not and you really want a girl who is actually attracted to you, stay away from Asia until you lose like 100 pounds. Your competition will have like half the body fat as you, you won't be able to compete.
The 1st thing I would do is turn on CB or go to DIA, tagged, Facebook or wherever and start interacting with Filipinas. You may meet one (or many) you like or you may not; either way you will get a better feel for the culture, the personality of the girls, what types you do and don't like, etc. You may decide to meet many or one when you arrive. You may decide to just show up and meet girls. But the effort to meet girls in advance I think is a good one. I ultimately met many girls who became friends and they were great at helping me navigate who were good and not so good pinays. Besides if you make a friend she may recommend a girl to you.
As to location, while I have always arranged to meet women in PI, I would still recommend researching and going to places that appeal to you. Dont just go to some shithole just because there is a girl there. There are Filipinas everywhere and you will be much happier in a city or town you like. And that happiness is more likely to attract girls to you.
IMO, the biggest obstacle for a guy your age who wants to marry is the perception among many Pinays that young guys are players. Actually it may be an accurate perception. This accounts for Filipinas interest in guys who are a bit older. But if you are sincere I believe you can overcome this.
As to the comment about weight, it's simply not true. You are no longer in the West and dont have to worry that you are not directly off the cover of GQ. Look neat and clean, smell nice (Pinays are into this) and you will do fine. That friend of mine who helped me (and is now best friends with my finacee) married an American who is 6'3", 50ish, and quite large - and they are very happy.
Hi Jerry, Regarding suggestions of what to do together, here is an article with our suggestions: https://www.christianfilipina.com/resea ... -homeland/
About your question regarding the kids, you need to ask in your heart what makes sense to you, but no matter what you must follow the firm rule that you never send money to anyone you haven't yet met in person.
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