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A Complete Dating Guide To Mainland Chinese Women

Discuss culture, living, traveling, relocating, dating or anything related to the Asian countries - China, The Philippines, Thailand, etc.

Moderators: jamesbond, fschmidt

Postby sea_dragon » Sat Oct 04, 2014 3:54 am

I know Kai means well, but the problem is that he sees it through rose-tinted glasses and can get very enthusiastic about China, particularly southern China. His guide assumes that everyone will do well in China, which is not the case. You won't know about China until you set foot in China and live there and judge based on your experiences. And how does one define 'do well' in China? China has over 1 billion people. He does give good advice and a lot of the stuff he says can cloud your own judgment. He has a bias towards southern Chinese women, since they tend to prefer non-Asian men the most. Sorry to say, but he does not know much about northern or eastern Chinese women. Personally, I do not find women from Sichuan, Hunan and Guangdong to be that attractive. Especially since they are a dime a dozen on those dating sites.
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Postby Ghost » Sat Oct 04, 2014 8:27 am

sea_dragon wrote:I know Kai means well, but the problem is that he sees it through rose-tinted glasses and can get very enthusiastic about China, particularly southern China. His guide assumes that everyone will do well in China, which is not the case. You won't know about China until you set foot in China and live there and judge based on your experiences. And how does one define 'do well' in China? China has over 1 billion people. He does give good advice and a lot of the stuff he says can cloud your own judgment. He has a bias towards southern Chinese women, since they tend to prefer non-Asian men the most. Sorry to say, but he does not know much about northern or eastern Chinese women. Personally, I do not find women from Sichuan, Hunan and Guangdong to be that attractive. Especially since they are a dime a dozen on those dating sites.


He was overly optimistic, and was well off in his career and good looking also. I think his intentions were good. But being overly optimistic can easily do more harm than good. It is easy to look at your own success and think it could be just as easy/possible for anyone.
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Postby Winston » Sat Oct 04, 2014 4:38 pm

Ok but why did you guys drive Kai off the forum? What happened? Why didn't this get resolved by a moderator? We lost a quality poster because of that. You guys did not address this.
Check out the latest posts in our blog The Happier Abroaders.

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Postby Ghost » Sat Oct 04, 2014 6:35 pm

Winston wrote:Ok but why did you guys drive Kai off the forum? What happened? Why didn't this get resolved by a moderator? We lost a quality poster because of that. You guys did not address this.


Didn't he end up getting all butt-hurt over something and then leave? That was his decision. No poster should be able to expect people not being allowed to disagree and not being allowed to post only things that said poster likes and agrees with. I thought we've been through this a million times.

Roosh heavily moderates his forum, and doesn't allow free speech or dissenting opinions. And his forum is full of delusional morons and ass-kissers. Perhaps worst of all, it is boring. The reason he gets a relatively high amount of posters is because he sells bullshit that gives false hope to young guys.
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Postby Winston » Sat Oct 04, 2014 6:42 pm

Ghost wrote:
Winston wrote:Ok but why did you guys drive Kai off the forum? What happened? Why didn't this get resolved by a moderator? We lost a quality poster because of that. You guys did not address this.


Didn't he end up getting all butt-hurt over something and then leave? That was his decision. No poster should be able to expect people not being allowed to disagree and not being allowed to post only things that said poster likes and agrees with. I thought we've been through this a million times.

Roosh heavily moderates his forum, and doesn't allow free speech or dissenting opinions. And his forum is full of delusional morons and a**-kissers. Perhaps worst of all, it is boring. The reason he gets a relatively high amount of posters is because he sells bullshit that gives false hope to young guys.


That's right. Bullshit sells in America. Truth doesn't. Plus there are more lower quality guys than higher quality ones. Morons like Repatriate don't understand that and don't take that into account. Like attracts like. Morons prefer other morons.

We allow free speech here, but it comes at a price. Free speech is not risk free without cost or consequences.

Why don't those of you who drove Kai away PM him to apologize and invite him back?
Check out the latest posts in our blog The Happier Abroaders.

Don't forget my HA Grand Ebook and Dating Sites!

"It takes far less effort to find and move to the society that has what you want than it does to try to reconstruct an existing society to match your standards." - Harry Browne, How I Found Freedom in an Unfree World
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Postby Ghost » Sat Oct 04, 2014 10:54 pm

If Kai left because of hurt feelings, then perhaps it is better that he left. The internet - and certainly HA - is not a place for the easily offended.
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Re: A Complete Dating Guide To Mainland Chinese Women

Postby khmerexpat » Wed Feb 18, 2015 8:30 am

I just spent several years in China, now live in Cambodia.

Short version:
Never visit mainland China, never date Chinese women from the mainland or in the mainland, never work in mainland China.
Avoid the country at all costs, no longer worth it. They only care about money and food, and they hate non-Chinese.

BANKING
In the past month they have begun to:

-Block your ATM card from within China when you try to use it outside of China. Chinese citizens have this problem as well. Imagine going to a BOA branch in Cambodia and they tell you that your card only works inside the USA. The ATM is closed, locked and turned off. You cannot do a counter withdrawal using your account number, you cannot wire the money to a new account you create at the BOA branch in Cambodia. This is at YOUR BANK, not some random ATM. No matter, you do not get your money.

You are screwed, your money is blocked. This is called Capital Controls.

I saw many Chinese try their cards in Bangkok, and they had the same issue. You do not have access to your money, they want you to spend it inside China, or you don't get it. It's not your money, it is theirs.

-Close foreigner accounts forcibly. If you move out of China, you cannot keep access to money inside China. Thus take it all in cash before you leave. Leave a -0- balance in all China based assets.

Why?

Because the banks now work with the PSB to track you. When your visa expires, the bank will send the PSB your activity and IF you had transactions AFTER the visa expired, the bank will close your account, seize all of your money, and zero your account. Your Union Pay card will thus not work once you leave China. I suspect the same will happen with your TaoBao, JD, eTao and other accounts. They don't want us to be there or have money there.

Oblige them and leave with every Jiao.

-Started a 5000 RMB reward program for any foreigners in the country on an expired, incorrect or bogus visa. Does not matter if YOU are legit - you go to your favourite noodle shack and 2 people flip open their phones, describe you, your location, what you are doing, ask if they can get the reward.

-Block access to your international China based calling sim. Thus leave a -0- balance on your mobile phone account also.

BEING WATCHED
Everywhere you go the stares, comments and phone calls to Police have increase 3X fold, to the point that literally 80% of anyone you pass on the street is talking about you.

The surveillance is constant - perhaps every 20 seconds.

To be aware of this requires some Chinese language ability, no small feat. Takes you 3+ years to reach that level. But once you do, all you learn is that they do not want you around and they talk about you constantly. "Constantly" by that I mean at least every 5 minutes, and recently many times per minute that you are out in public.

-Follow you to your hotel, stand in the lot, call the PSB when you or your friends leave.

-Monitor and surveil you as you travel on buses. You take a local bus to another city - they turn around constantly, 2 get on the phone and report you to the police, where you are coming from, and so on.

WOMEN
-The women only care about money.
-The day after the wedding she has a pile of baby books, sits on the sofa, and eats constantly.
-Chinese women only have sex to procreate.
-The day she gets pregnant, no more sex and she will sit on the sofa for 12+ months, surfing her phone, eating, doing nothing. You will work all day, do all of the cleaning when you get home, and she will demand to be waited on by you for her every need.
-By month 4 of the relationship you will be begging for and scheduling sex.
-By year 4 it is over, at year 10 level for a USA marriage. It deteriorates must faster than a NA marriage.

-Most of you will never date a Chinese woman. They chant NO NO NO NO I am a traditional Chinese girl, and back up in horror, we don't do that when you try to date them, hook up, touch them, kiss them. But they will video sex chat with you on QQ, but they won't EVER meet you in person. Because sticking a black dildo up her ass for a 45 minute porn show on QQ Video is traditional Chinese behavior and ''OK', but having sex with you is not ok.

In short, China and Mainland Chinese are full of shit. They lie, cheat, steal. They surveill, watch, monitor and spy on non-Chinese constantly. The women won't date you because you are not Han, and if you DO manage to date one the only thing she will care about is money. She will want you to work to death to feed her insatiable greed, and she won't have sex with you after she gets pregnant.

You will be a wallet, a slave, nothing more - and everyone will use racial slurs constantly to refer to you and your little laowai baby.

============================

Whilst in INTERNATIONAL AIRPORTS in SE Asia NOT CHINA, Chinese refer to anyone NOT Chinese as a Laowai or WeiGuoRen.

This is racist, intolerant and ignorant in the extreme.

Chinese will lie to you and tell you that the world Laowai is one of respect as Lao means old or revered.

They are lying and full of shit. It also means 'forever outsider" as in always outside China. It is used to divide, demean, deride and mock. To refer to others outside of China this way is hate speech and nothing more.

Any excuses Winston or any other Chinese members give you are also without credibility. They are Chinese - and are treated differently than non-Chinese.

Do not go to China. Leave them to their greed, hate, intolerance and ignorance.

Their money is not worth it - find another business source.

I predict that now members will deny deny deny what I posted. This is typical.

STAY AWAY. Avoid PRC at ALL COSTS. They are reverting to type, ~1966.

Non-Chinese are not welcome, you cannot build a life, you cannot have a bank account, you cannot build a business.

Just say no.
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Re: A Complete Dating Guide To Mainland Chinese Women

Postby Jester » Wed Feb 18, 2015 9:13 am

Interesting.

Of course this OP smells troll-y.

{EDIT: Of course I was referring to KhmerExpat's post just above this one. He posted the same day he joined, so maybe it was his first post. But not the OP of the thread, obviously. My bad.}


But the capital control bit is interesting. Is China locking down its cash?
This will be hard to verify unless members here have Mainland China bank accounts, which seems unlikely. I think HA has one member from Red China, the young guy who was studying in Vancouver.

Who else here is in China right now? Can you refute this OP?
Last edited by Jester on Fri Feb 20, 2015 8:09 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: A Complete Dating Guide To Mainland Chinese Women

Postby Yohan » Wed Feb 18, 2015 12:20 pm

khmerexpat wrote:I just spent several years in China, now live in Cambodia


Cambodia is a small country with little population, China is a big country, overcrowded in many large cities.

However both are Communist orientated, you cannot trust them. In both countries the Communist party wants to control everything.

China is known for arbitrary changing of business related laws. Only large foreign companies can accept that. Foreign small investors often lost a lot of money.

I prefer Cambodia to China anytime, but I am not a business man. I found the people of Cambodia to be modest, friendly and honest, not into cheating.

The Cambodians are quite different from the Chinese, it's OK to be a foreigner in Cambodia, 1 year business visa is quickly issued.
It is also easy to arrange all what you need and cannot be found in Cambodia by visiting Thailand.

The only problem in Cambodia I found was my impression that it lacks activities, it is getting boring soon. However you can solve that by travelling a little around to Vietnam and Laos and of course also Thailand.

Cambodia can become terribly hot if you are away from the coastline during dry/hot season. There is no much to do during night, shops in Cambodia are closing early, often street lights are not functioning or even not existent.

It's up to the individual to decide, there are everywhere advantages and disadvantages, there is no 100 % perfect country.

... Chinese refer to anyone NOT Chinese as a Laowai or WeiGuoRen.
This is racist, intolerant and ignorant in the extreme.
Chinese will lie to you and tell you that the world Laowai is one of respect as Lao means old or revered.


外國人wei-gou-ren, 外国人gaikokujin in Japanese, is not racist.
It simply means: foreigner, foreign national - nothing wrong with using this word.

老外 lao-wai is not necessarily negative either, it depends on the context.
老朋友 lao-peng -you means 'old friend', 老師 lao-shi is also a respectful term towards older respected people in the family, also towards teachers...

Gweilo 鬼佬 - a cantonese word - is insulting towards Western foreigners.
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Re: A Complete Dating Guide To Mainland Chinese Women

Postby newlifeinphilippines » Wed Feb 18, 2015 10:59 pm

I think hes probably right about chinese women from what ive heard about the women from a sex point of view, etc. Its the exact reason why i stay clear of even thinking of china AND vietnam (cause both are culturally the same). Even cambodians are probably closer to chinese thinking than phil so ive crossed them off (plus lots of mongers from thailand go there and the country sucks anyways).
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Re: A Complete Dating Guide To Mainland Chinese Women

Postby Devil Dog » Thu Feb 19, 2015 5:12 am

newlifeinphilippines wrote:I think hes probably right about chinese women from what ive heard about the women from a sex point of view, etc. Its the exact reason why i stay clear of even thinking of china AND vietnam (cause both are culturally the same). Even cambodians are probably closer to chinese thinking than phil so ive crossed them off (plus lots of mongers from thailand go there and the country sucks anyways).


Here is the problem with HA, good posters like Kai are ridiculed and run off for having opinions while "experts" like newlifephilippines machinegun post daily opinions how they "think" it "probably" is based upon "what I've heard".

nlp has not contributed as much real information in his 2100+ posts as Kai contributed in his first posts of this thread. But that is what HA has become, mostly just static thrown out by underachievers.
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Re: A Complete Dating Guide To Mainland Chinese Women

Postby MrMan » Thu Feb 19, 2015 9:14 am

I had a conversation with an American living in China. He and his wife both live there. I think they are close to retirement age.

During our conversation, he said that if I knew any Christian American men who wanted to marry Chinese, there were plenty of Chinese Christian women there, about 75% women in the churches, wanting to marry Christian husbands. He said a lot of Chinese women like American men.

He also said some Chinese women could be controlling, and even worse, the mother-in-law on either side could try to control the couple and could cause stress in the marriage.
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Re: A Complete Dating Guide To Mainland Chinese Women

Postby droid » Thu Feb 19, 2015 6:32 pm

I think he's full of it
During my week in china i had zero problems and was treated like royalty
And yeah Kai is sorely missed
1)Too much of one thing defeats the purpose.
2)Everybody is full of it. What's your hypocrisy?
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Re: A Complete Dating Guide To Mainland Chinese Women

Postby xiongmao » Thu Feb 19, 2015 8:14 pm

Yes we are probably being trolled hard. Although for what it's worth I only really care about money and food as well.

My ATM card worked in China but not in Thailand. A quick call to my bank sorted that.

Chinese women do like sex for fun. One of my ex's talked about sex a lot with her colleague. They weren't just interested in it for the baby making.

I found Chinese people very friendly, and can't recall any bad incidents. So few spoke English that they didn't really interact much. I saw a lot more anti-foreigner stuff going on in Thailand.

It was quite easy to get dates in China, even with my extremely limited Mandarin skills.
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Re: A Complete Dating Guide To Mainland Chinese Women

Postby persistantexpat2 » Fri Feb 20, 2015 4:02 am

You are not being trolled. I lived there for years and left last week.

What I posted is NOT exaggerated.

Everything I wrote has happened to me, or to people that I know, in Central China, and these events have happened in the past 8 weeks. A dozen teachers (Africa, USA,

EU) had their accounts frozen, cleared of all funds, and blocked. The surveillance, reporting, reward seeking and monitoring - happened to me and several others. The

greedy wives, 3 men I know personally in Central China. The business being stolen: 2 men and the stories online are plentiful. Beer brewers, magazine publishers,

cranes being shipped, tool and die manufacturers, Rio Tinto, on and on and on.

This is reality - your denial does not change that.

=============

@Droid
droid Wrote » Thu Feb 19, 2015 6:32 pm:
"I think he's full of it
During my WEEK in china i had zero problems and was treated like royalty"

WEEK? I lived in China for years. Have YOU lived in Central China? No - you likely have traveled to Shanghai, Beijing or Shenzhen and think that is what life is like

in the other 95% of China.

It is not. BSG are very different from the remainder of the country and are NOT representative.

How could you POSSIBLY THINK that a 7 days holiday could ever give you the right to differ with someone who lived in China for years?

Why would ANYONE accept your 7 days opinion over my years of on the ground experience?

=============

@Yohan
-The Chinese law about the house being claimed is a red herring and not what I wrote.

What I wrote is that Chinese women control the money, it's all in her name, and she took it all and built a house and told her non-Chinese husband AFTER she had

reduced the bank account to a few hundred USD. The house is 3 hours from where he works and lives, basically for his wife's family. Sure ""he actually owns it"" but it

is all in his wife's name. More Chinese nonsense and lack of credibility.

"It is also true that a good number of Chinese women are highly materialistic orientated."

ALL ALL ALL. They only care about money. Friends and former co-workers have actually said this to me:
"You could buy an apartment, and when you leave China you could give it to ME! (giggle).

People offer to "help you buy a house/car" - this means that a Chinese person with National ID must sign on the bill, deed or contract.
IN OThER WORDS you give them the asset ''but you *actually own it* - yeah, like the guy whose wife spent it all on a house in her ancestral village.

It's a scam to get you to hand over tens of thousands to someone who is Chinese. Marriage has the same result. They want the money to stay in China.

""I think it would be a good idea for you to spend your retirement money in China."
Comments like these are common.

=============

@Yohan
Your defence of racist language is as I predicted.

If a black person tells you that referring to them with the N-word is offensive and wrong, you do not make excuses.
YOU STOP USING THE WORD.

What YOU think does not matter.

Would YOU give credibility to a white man in the deep south in 1950 telling YOU that the N-word is just a harmless word of affection he uses for blacks? No - you would

tell such a person that he had no credibility.

Laowai is a racist word. Period.

=============

@Jonny Law
your response was predicted by me in the linked thread in the OP above. You have no rebuttal - you only attack. That's the typical Chinese response learnt in 1966.

When accused, attack ten fold with allegations true or not. Just attack.


Winston Wrote:
"We allow free speech here,"

Apparently not. I would speculate that the Chinese intolerance for criticism or any other point of view, that they think they can tell people what opinions to have

*when they are in other countries* (look at the recent uproar over Taiwan having its own nation placard - Students kicked out of Harvard Model UN event after

protesting listing of Taiwan as country) is now a policy here at HA. If Winston is uncomfortable with the truth of how Mainland Chinese treat non-Chinese, then perhaps

he should bring that up with them when he visits - or simply tell his Taiwanese relatives to stop referring to non-Chinese with racist, offensive words.

That would be a good start.

=============

@xiongmao » Thu Feb 19, 2015 8:14 pm
"Yes we are probably being trolled hard. Although for what it's worth I only really care about money and food as well."

-Those are not human qualities xiongmao - those are character defects.

I was at the Western Union location here and 5 others were there, all Mainland Chinese, all had the exact same problem. Fortunately for them one of the clerks was

fluent enough in Mandarin to help them out.

Our China-based ATM cards DO NOT WORK OUTSIDE THE COUNTRY. The bank the card was issued from WILL NOT ACCEPT IT OUTSIDE OF CHINA. Imagine going to the RBS in Australia

and being told you cannot get your money. Not at some random ATM - at the actual bank your account resides.

"It was quite easy to get dates in China, even with my extremely limited Mandarin skills.""

You were only in Beijing or Shanghai or have a Chinese face.

This is a total lie and everyone I know from Central China expressed the same opinion - that guys like you and Kai are either lying or victims of self-selection or

survivorship bias. Chinese women will RECOIL IN HORROR and chant NO NO NO NO NO NO I am traditional we do not do that NO NO NO NO NO. You need Mandarin/Puntonghua

fluency to date in the country outside of BSG. We all talk about posts like yours and conclude that you are completely wrong when we compare to our reality in Central

China (Henan, etc.). Total fiction, nothing is as you write.

=============

@by Devil Dog » Thu Feb 19, 2015 5:12 am
"good posters like Kai"

Mislead, lie and give the wrong impression about China. He could even be a Jinan Wu Miao plant.

Most of what he wrote is either wrong, contradicted by the direct experience of me and those that I know who live in China, or omits so many crucial details as to be

useless.

=============
@Everyone
Since the mods and Winston do not want to hear this truth, only one truth that they approve of, agree with, and that they like, they will ban this membership as well.

No matter. I will set up a blog or site from here in SE Asia to let others know about China. I will spend the next 30 years writing about this and warning every human

being that I can.

Short version: Stay away, never go there, spend no money there, never work there, never tourist there, date no Mainland women ever, never marry a Mainland Chinese

woman in China or the USA, do not bring a Mainland Chinese woman back to your country.

Stay completely away, forever.
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