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Some worrying signs in China regarding Chinese females...

Discuss culture, living, traveling, relocating, dating or anything related to the Asian countries - China, The Philippines, Thailand, etc.

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Post by Bao3niang » November 13th, 2013, 8:10 am

Marriages in ancient China were almost always arranged, and for the benefit of the families rather than for love. The Confucian view of marriage was that the purposes of marriage were to carry on the family line and care for each other's clans long-term. Affection between male and female was rarely taken into consideration, or at least not considered as important. Even today, matchmaking is still widely practiced throughout China, especially for females who are considered to be at the age for marriage or past the socially accepted age for marriage. This has gotten to the point where people marry for the sake of it, if you know what I mean.

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Post by magnum » November 13th, 2013, 9:34 am

My ex-chiense girl friend dumped me because we aren't a good match, her words were "the man should be as good or better then the woman" in her case, she's going to a apparently high level college and flat out told me she wants a dream guy and I'm not it, she wants man who has a engineering degree.

Of course this was after her father told her to "Really think about it"

So she destroyed my hopes and dreams, literally had my other in tears and my father was broken up about it, we'd skype them for her home town when I was living with her and her father for the months I stayed in china.

Beware dating Chinese women, at least the educated ones, I spent everything I had on this girl, and that includes the non-financial.

These traits you said you only see in older crazy women, well my ex had only recently been 19 years old "now 20" and she was willing to lie to her father at first for are relationship.

I was 3 months from giving this girl a family ring as a engagement ring, she shared interment things about her past she never told anyone before...and then this, so even the trust was in place, but on a whim she up and changed her mind.

I don't know if all Chinese women are like this....but It is my personal experience I'm sorry to say. she has forever altered my reality about women, both foreign and American.

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Post by Bao3niang » November 14th, 2013, 1:19 am

Aha! So her father did influence her decision to break up with you! However, that also says something bout East Asians, which are taught from an early age (either directly or more subtly) to be submissive and dependent on parents/family. Asian parents create this co-dependency with their kids.

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Post by Rayn » November 14th, 2013, 6:07 am

Bao3niang wrote:Starting from ancient times, the Chinese nation has been very, very based on practical success. During the dynastic periods, pretty much the sole gateway to success in society and pretty much the only purpose of a man's life was to study his a** off and do well in the imperial exams. There were many who continued studying for these exams (having failed them many times) well into old age, because there were very few other methods for self-actualization. So basically one's life wasted on an exam lol. How miserable.....
The reason why the Chinese (and other East Asians) place so much value on academic achievement stems from this age-old system and belief / mantra that studying hard and excelling as a student will exalt you in life (which ofc I don't believe in). And I'm using the word exalt because it's an almost divine honor to both you and your family. In ancient times, if you were a "状元", or top performer, you became a celebrity.

Chinese love of money extends to religion and beliefs. That's why a lot of Buddhist figures (altered or completely made up by Chinese Buddhism) as well as Chinese mythological/pagan figures are revered as beings that give fortune. The Chinese people have always been pragmatic, and focus on everyday life/society. This was advocated by Confucius, who was non-theist and non-spiritual by nature. Ancestor worshipping and other rituals are more about tradition/obligation than real spiritualism.
China traditionally was a gigantic nation with a deeply ingrained feudal-like structure where a small number of excessively rich ruling elite dominates over the poor masses.

One may think that the imperial examinations signify how ancient China has social mobility - when theoretically a destitute peasant could become a wealthy bureaucrat if he's smart enough - but its the opposite. It was precisely BECAUSE of low social mobility that everyone was so crazy about scoring in the examinations. Otherwise they will have absolutely no way in improving their lives (except maybe joining the military).

You'll find the same similar symptoms everywhere in countries with low social mobility. The lower the social mobility the more likely you see the people living their lives as rat-racing yuppies.

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Post by Bao3niang » November 15th, 2013, 12:33 am

I sort of went off-topic with my previous posts in this thread. I've been to Shenzhen, and from what people tell me, 70% of the people there are not locals. This is because Shenzhen is designated as a SEZ (Special Economic Zone) by the Chinese government, making it a favorite spot to get rich for people from all across China.

Perhaps this is just me, but I think women from the Cantonese speaking areas (Guangdong, HK, Macau) are among the most superficial and picky, second next to Beijing and Shanghai women.

The native Guangdong women tend to have very small features (not good looking to me) and are very short tempered plus good at lying.

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