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Dating rotation. The best approach to find a relationship?

Discuss culture, living, traveling, relocating, dating or anything related to the Asian countries - China, The Philippines, Thailand, etc.

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Dating rotation. The best approach to find a relationship?

Postby newlifeinphilippines » Sat Dec 14, 2013 12:19 am

In the philippines do you guys discreetly date multiple women without them knowing you are seeing others so you can keep the good ones in your rotation without jealousy until you find a good girl among them for a realtionship. or do you find the best strategy of being open that your dating multiple women so they will work harder for your affection? Im not sure the best strategy cause i want a relationship with a decent girl but i need to meet a lot in order to find the best one and i dont want to be forced or accidentally fall for a girl and then regret it knowing i had better optiosn. Im at the point i think i just wont care and let them know so they will work harder for my affection. If im dating tons of women simultaneously they will easily figure out that im dating many women so thats why im thinking i should just be honest and so i can get a better choice. If they aren't ready for that then theyd probably werent worth the effort anyways. Im lining up a bunch of possibilities on the dating sites so kind of need to have a strategy before i get off the plane.
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Postby tre » Sat Dec 14, 2013 12:33 am

Filipinas a very jealous by nature so whatever you do, keep it vague. She has no right to know who you are seeing until you are in a committed relationship and I doubt giving her details will help you...at all.
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Postby newlifeinphilippines » Sat Dec 14, 2013 12:40 am

tre wrote:Filipinas a very jealous by nature so whatever you do, keep it vague. She has no right to know who you are seeing until you are in a committed relationship and I doubt giving her details will help you...at all.


Yeah I know but if i go 2 to 5 days without seeing her cause my rotation is growing so big and maybe barely texting her cause i have such a busy schedule and can't see the same girl very often wont they figure out that im seeing other women? Although I do work online so i can say that im busy with work in my hotel I guess. So thats an out I have that many others dont. :) Even if i hide my tracks seem like it would be easy for them to figure out. So its sort of a dilemma, cause im gonna have like 30 to 50 contacts im filtering down to (after camming or seeing facebook or multiple pictures) and id hope to meet most of them possibly unless one of the first few knockes me off my feet chemistry wise and sleeps with me then i wont need to :)
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Postby tre » Sat Dec 14, 2013 12:58 am

30-50 Contacts? I'd narrow that meeting list down to your top 10 at very least. They'll mostly all likely be willing to sleep with you after 2-3 dates (or less) so don't let that cloud your judgement.

I recommend narrowing it down quickly from 10 (or less) to 2 or 3 (or less) as quickly as possible. That way you can see all of them easily within 3-4 days time. I've been busy enough that I couldn't see ANYONE outside of 1 night per week so saying that you are busy shouldn't be hard to believe.

You aren't doing anything "wrong" so don't allow yourself to feel guilty or stressed. Going to the Philippines and marrying the first girl to show interest is insane. Best to see what is out there and discover who you will be compatible with long-term.
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Postby newlifeinphilippines » Sat Dec 14, 2013 7:00 am

tre wrote:30-50 Contacts? I'd narrow that meeting list down to your top 10 at very least. They'll mostly all likely be willing to sleep with you after 2-3 dates (or less) so don't let that cloud your judgement.

I recommend narrowing it down quickly from 10 (or less) to 2 or 3 (or less) as quickly as possible. That way you can see all of them easily within 3-4 days time. I've been busy enough that I couldn't see ANYONE outside of 1 night per week so saying that you are busy shouldn't be hard to believe.

You aren't doing anything "wrong" so don't allow yourself to feel guilty or stressed. Going to the Philippines and marrying the first girl to show interest is insane. Best to see what is out there and discover who you will be compatible with long-term.



I spoke too soon i may have narrowed my list down to 1 now (but ill have backups in case it doesnt work in person). Right after this thread i finally chatted with an educated girl who is willing to meet me at airport. Even seen her family next to her. She is no dummy and she seems legit and is even light skinned and at her house and hates getting off chat she seems to really like me. She claims to have never met a foreigner either. She assures me she will take care of me etc. Theres other things but i think this girl would be a good catch compared to some of my other choices.
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Postby Mr S » Sat Dec 14, 2013 12:04 pm

If you want to date multiple girls in PI and not get caught it's best to stay in the metro Manila area since it's less likely you will be caught or seen by someone she knows. Once the girl thinks you are hers all her friends and casual ones will know what you look like and it becomes much harder to not be seen out and about. Believe me if you are in one of the other cities you will be seen eventually by someone she knows if you are dating other girls and she thinks you should only be with her. I was in Manila and this was still happening to me, I can imagine how easy it is to be caught in one of the other smaller cities.

Generally though most girls are not that smart and if you have an IQ of over 100 you can run circles around them if you cover your tracks right when being with multiple women.

If you do happen to hook up with a smart one, they can be worse than Western women in some ways so just because she is a Filipina and seems nice doesn't mean she isn't a super bitch, just in a different way than what one would find in a Western country.

You gotta be on the ground at least 6 months in my opinion to weed through women and find decent options. The longer you can hang out there before committing to any one girl the better your chances of finding a decent one. They are out there just not as many as one might think. There are a lot of marginal girls in PI but because Western women have fallen so far from the tree most Western guys think they have hit gold in PI, which is really just a matter of personal perception and experience.
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Postby newlifeinphilippines » Sat Dec 14, 2013 7:19 pm

Mr S wrote:If you want to date multiple girls in PI and not get caught it's best to stay in the metro Manila area since it's less likely you will be caught or seen by someone she knows. Once the girl thinks you are hers all her friends and casual ones will know what you look like and it becomes much harder to not be seen out and about. Believe me if you are in one of the other cities you will be seen eventually by someone she knows if you are dating other girls and she thinks you should only be with her. I was in Manila and this was still happening to me, I can imagine how easy it is to be caught in one of the other smaller cities.

Generally though most girls are not that smart and if you have an IQ of over 100 you can run circles around them if you cover your tracks right when being with multiple women.

If you do happen to hook up with a smart one, they can be worse than Western women in some ways so just because she is a Filipina and seems nice doesn't mean she isn't a super bitch, just in a different way than what one would find in a Western country.

You gotta be on the ground at least 6 months in my opinion to weed through women and find decent options. The longer you can hang out there before committing to any one girl the better your chances of finding a decent one. They are out there just not as many as one might think. There are a lot of marginal girls in PI but because Western women have fallen so far from the tree most Western guys think they have hit gold in PI, which is really just a matter of personal perception and experience.



I been on the ground there for a total of 9 months but not actually dating but i can tell in person a lot about the girls cause I was in a relationship with a bargirl for 1.5 years there so I know a girl who is bad and also went on a date with a couple REAL girls but only for one date only (one was in a church i met and the other had never met a foreigner and was at home at her mom and the hotel driver introduced her to me by phone). Ive contacted and cammed quite a few on teh dating site and filtered it down some but this girl i talked to yesterday seems like she is willing to meet me at airport (her paying but i said i would) we hit it off immediately. She was professional in how she corresponded before I even had a chance to see her on cam. Even mentioning about going places together and showing her family to me on cam. she is fully engaging etc and I think shed be ready for sex real quick. Not the traditional good girl but not a party or hoe girl I think. I suspect her agenda is that she is a gold digger who wants me to wine and dine her around cause most other girls on the dating site or in real life are more conservative in their approach (not going to airport or not mentioning about going to beaches etc together so soon cause that implies sex lol). But she just finished up her education in a prestigious degree (not tourism management) and her facebook only has 83 friends with no foreigners and she posted hse is careful who she adds. Sh e said i would be her first foreigner. I figure ill zero in on this girl cause of the chemistry and her willingness to go the extra mile for me, maybe even sex straight from the airport haha :) My experience so far with chatting with other girls from the dating sites is those without an agenda it seems are very careful and almost cold in their approach and wont go the extra mile for you. I'm not planning on marriage though so hopefully no baby accidents so my standards aren't wife material its just I want a girl that is more genuine than my lying hoe was who lied and acted about everything and was a lot of drama and fights cause of her being the bitch she was. So ill actually be comparing the new girls to a filipina bitch not an american one LOL
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Postby Hero » Sat Dec 14, 2013 8:17 pm

I think the best policy is don't ask, don't tell. I dated multiple women over there, and most of them didn't ask if I was seeing other girls. When they do ask me if I'm visiting other women, I think it's best to just dump them. I don't think that I should have to date one woman exclusively unless we're engaged, married, or sleeping together.
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Postby newlifeinphilippines » Sat Dec 14, 2013 9:36 pm

Hero wrote:I think the best policy is don't ask, don't tell. I dated multiple women over there, and most of them didn't ask if I was seeing other girls. When they do ask me if I'm visiting other women, I think it's best to just dump them. I don't think that I should have to date one woman exclusively unless we're engaged, married, or sleeping together.


Things changed quickly after i made this thread. before talking to her i hand a bunch i seen on cam or chatted on or seen their pictures or facebook but none were standing out for me as "the one". I think this one girl is sort of hinting i will get balls deep action right away and she ill take good care of me etc. so ill zero in on her to see what are the possibility cause she seems like catch not a hoe but im keeping my contacts open just as a backup in case things dont work out but im 90 percent sure we might even ahve sex straight from the airport LOL but she dont say anything explicityl buy the whole meeting me at airport and talking about going places together its sort of implied :) If she is a great girl with chemistry I dont see why i should even bother dating anyone else unless our differences can never be settled or she gets tired of a relationship going nowhere.
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Postby xiongmao » Sun Dec 15, 2013 4:34 pm

I rotated ladies in Thailand, mostly because they all worked such long hours I could only see many of them once a week.

Rotating ladies also means you can't fall in love so easily.

So generally I think it's a good system.
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Postby newlifeinphilippines » Mon Dec 16, 2013 12:04 am

xiongmao wrote:I rotated ladies in Thailand, mostly because they all worked such long hours I could only see many of them once a week.

Rotating ladies also means you can't fall in love so easily.

So generally I think it's a good system.


unless you start falling in love online with a specific girl like i have now suddenly lol :)

I figure go with the girl i really connect and I think is great and engages with me and see her off the plane and see how it goes. I have no reason to see others if she is great based on my experience id say there is 99 percent chance she is gonna be great chemistry wise and what she has said to me and how I feel and think about her. I been through the ringer enough in philippines dont really want to mess with every girl if it risks losing a great one just cause its the best strategy if the first girl I meet is great after i filtered many I went through online to find what i want.
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Postby Repatriate » Mon Dec 16, 2013 1:06 pm

I think not being on facebook helps a great deal when doing this sort of thing. A lot of the girls ask me if i'm on facebook when I meet them and are eager to add me. I think this is just another way for them to plant their little flag even though there's really nothing there yet. Facebook is nothing but trouble.
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Postby newlifeinphilippines » Wed Dec 18, 2013 7:24 pm

Still seems like I wont have to go after my rotation strategy seems like things are going good with this particular girl i been chatting on cam with. after a chat last night it seems like "said girl" is open to a financial arrangement after she mentioned she needed to go look for a job soon and that she could still meet me at airport and have time for when I come. But Im thinking if she gets a new job then maybe she wont have much time for me and I could use help around the hotel too. So i offered that shed be better off working for me where she stays with me instead for salary for herself and her parents of looking for a job so she can spend time with me and take care of me. She wasn't sure if i was serious at first. I can just offset costs by not wining and dining her at restaraunts or entertainment as much for dates so its about the same costs. Its better to just help her out so she can stay with me. She wanted to go home early evening cause she is shy for her family knowing but im telling her just make an excuse that your working at a call center at night. Seems like many regular women there are ok with some sort of maid or caretaker girlfriend financial role.

my bargirl before we had that kind of arrangement but she was jaded and slutty from her trashy bar past and multiple relationships so she was using and cheating on me and looking around from day one she was a wonderful actress though and very cute and playful. I dont want to step into a bar again after i seen how far they will act and deceive. And its depressing knowing your girl was on a pole and will screw any guy every night for a few bucks or look online for a guy while your away in america. I fell in love with her but after a 1.5 years it was time to move on and get a more wholesome girl i dont want to go back and spin my wheels with the same girl again.
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Postby newlifeinphilippines » Mon Dec 23, 2013 1:59 am

I started looking deeper into her pictures and of her on cam and eralize shes not that attractive as I thought when you get away from the glamour shots and full of makeup so it would be crazy to make it so serious before even meeting her. I definitely think the dating rotation is the best idea until you find a hot girl possibly to girlfriend. I'm not gonna make a slightly above average girl my girlfriend sorry its too much cost and investment over there. I dont think its worth spending months and all that money to girlfriend a girl that isn't very cute/young or attractive. Shallow yes but it is what it is.

I made too many promises so i backed off about meeting her at the airport etc etc. Told her things were moving too fast she understands. I think shes already looking around now for other guys on the site it seems lol

Definitely think a dating rotation idea is better.
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