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Guys that married a Pinay < 10 years age difference

Discuss culture, living, traveling, relocating, dating or anything related to the Asian countries - China, The Philippines, Thailand, etc.

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Postby Mr S » Fri Apr 18, 2014 3:04 pm

davewe wrote:
Mr S wrote:If you plan on living in PI or other country that's not Western than you can pick whatever kind of girl you want but if you know you are going to go back to a Western country like the states then you should consider a professional girl who can make halfway decent money rather than stay at home or only capable of working retail or as the cleaning lady in some business. Because there are so many nurses many Filipinos just follow the crowd and so you will have a lot of low quality women who got their degree in nursing but it doesn't mean that all nurses are hopeless as a potential GF, you guys are really stupid if you believe that.



Of course there are plenty of nurses out there who will make good gfs or wives. But just as some guys are swayed by looks, many are swayed by the "she's middle class, she's a professional"view. Just don't be fooled into believing that just because a girl has a profession that she is by definition a good person who will make a good wife. She might be but she might just want to get there for the job.

I already stated this rough presumption in the previous post.

But for me there's a bigger issue that each man must decide. That is what kind if life do you want with your girl? Do you need the extra money? Do you need the prestige of having a girl with a professional job? Are you worried that if your wife is home or works a lesser job that it will reflect on you? Are you interested in kids and if so do you want a stay at home wife or one who might put career first? I have no answers (except for myself) but just throwing out the questions you want to ask yourself and your girl long before you decide to have her join you at home.


The poster said he was eventually going back to the states so from my personal experience the professional type girls have the best success rate with staying together over the long haul in a Western country. This is why I recommended it. Almost every single dude I know who has brought a non-professional or lower educated girl back to their home Western country has run into issues in their marriage and most of them got divorced. I believe there is a strong risk of the marriage going wrong and falling apart when the girl does not have some kind of skill that she can parlay into some kind of usefulness in the states or other Western country. Cause even if you have kids with them they will slowly go crazy being kept at home and if your not around a lot because of your job or business they will start finding other means to socialize with others. Those others could be feminized women who put alternative thoughts into her head, it could be random dudes always hitting on her when she is out on her own, it could be social media conversations that lead to other things.

When a girl from a lower socio-economic background and education suddenly finds her self in the dog eat dog world of the anglosphere they usually end up changing cause they don't have the independent critical thinking skills to handle outside social pressures that are telling her to conform to how the women and people act in said country. I've watched former girls I've dated get married to foreigners and all of them except one now has gotten divorced, and always after they got their permanent residency. I've watched my former expat coworkers and friends get married and bring them back to their home countries and they all have marriage issues now, these are what would be considered normal girls but lower educated or social strata. When I was in the Navy I saw the same thing and when I worked for some veteran offices I saw the same thing with the ones married to Filipinas, their life was a living hell or they were married but basically lived separate lives.

Personally I would not risk bringing back a lower socio-economic Filipina back to the states unless she was properly educated with some kind of useful job skill plus a reeducation that you do upon her as well to make sure she won't change into a monster after living in a Western country for a few years. This is why just talking over the internet or visiting for a few weeks then deciding to get a fiance visa is the biggest mistake a dude can make. I know guys are lonely but a lot of these women are shrewd and will play you like a fiddle and once they have their permanent residency she will drop you and move on to the guy she really wants to be with. There is less of a chance of this happening if she is from a middle class background and has halfway decent education that did not arise from you sending her to school after the fact.

If you are permanently living in PI or another non-Western country then you can get with or marry any kind of socio-economic educated girl cause you know she won't change much only what she gets from you being around her. I've learned my lesson the hard way through personal experience. In the future I would be very careful getting involved with a women that is not from the middle class of which ever country she is from. It's just too difficult to deal with the differences between each others life experiences and expectations. Yes, it can be done but one has to put a lot of time and effort fixing the deficiencies that someone growing up poor has to bring them up to middle class standards and be able to function appropriately in situations where middle class behaviors are needed, which is what one has to have to basically get by in a 1st world country nowadays. But like i said if you never plan to live in your home country again then it doesn't matter if she is educated or came from a poor family as long as she is compatible with you.

This book gives a well researched outline of how to deal with poverty and move and understand the different social stratas of poverty, middle-class and wealth/elite. It details how to communicate with each one and how one would be able to blend in with one or the other which you initially did not belong in:

http://www.amazon.com/Framework-Underst ... ng+poverty

Image

This is the last discussion post I'm responding to on this board because I'm essentially just a clown and only know how to blow up condoms into balloons and all my PI experiences are just jokes to laugh about and not be taken seriously and have no merit. Cause I really don't know what I'm talking about, I'm just a jokester, that's all.

You all can enjoy meandering your way through PI and figure it out yourself from now on.

This post is not against your remarks davewe, I just felt compelled to respond to you and give some last decent feedback before I cease operations on the Asian board. I'm done dealing with the numerous shleps on this board who only take, take, take but never give much of any useful advice or info themselves other than disparaging remarks and whatnot that cause continuing consternation on this board rather than insightful unification of information.
"The object of life is not to be on the side of the majority but to escape finding oneself in the ranks of the insane." Marcus Aurelius, Roman Emperor and stoic philosopher, 121-180 A.D.
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Postby OutWest » Fri Apr 18, 2014 3:36 pm

Mr S wrote:
davewe wrote:
Mr S wrote:If you plan on living in PI or other country that's not Western than you can pick whatever kind of girl you want but if you know you are going to go back to a Western country like the states then you should consider a professional girl who can make halfway decent money rather than stay at home or only capable of working retail or as the cleaning lady in some business. Because there are so many nurses many Filipinos just follow the crowd and so you will have a lot of low quality women who got their degree in nursing but it doesn't mean that all nurses are hopeless as a potential GF, you guys are really stupid if you believe that.



Of course there are plenty of nurses out there who will make good gfs or wives. But just as some guys are swayed by looks, many are swayed by the "she's middle class, she's a professional"view. Just don't be fooled into believing that just because a girl has a profession that she is by definition a good person who will make a good wife. She might be but she might just want to get there for the job.

I already stated this rough presumption in the previous post.

But for me there's a bigger issue that each man must decide. That is what kind if life do you want with your girl? Do you need the extra money? Do you need the prestige of having a girl with a professional job? Are you worried that if your wife is home or works a lesser job that it will reflect on you? Are you interested in kids and if so do you want a stay at home wife or one who might put career first? I have no answers (except for myself) but just throwing out the questions you want to ask yourself and your girl long before you decide to have her join you at home.


The poster said he was eventually going back to the states so from my personal experience the professional type girls have the best success rate with staying together over the long haul in a Western country. This is why I recommended it. Almost every single dude I know who has brought a non-professional or lower educated girl back to their home Western country has run into issues in their marriage and most of them got divorced. I believe there is a strong risk of the marriage going wrong and falling apart when the girl does not have some kind of skill that she can parlay into some kind of usefulness in the states or other Western country. Cause even if you have kids with them they will slowly go crazy being kept at home and if your not around a lot because of your job or business they will start finding other means to socialize with others. Those others could be feminized women who put alternative thoughts into her head, it could be random dudes always hitting on her when she is out on her own, it could be social media conversations that lead to other things.

When a girl from a lower socio-economic background and education suddenly finds her self in the dog eat dog world of the anglosphere they usually end up changing cause they don't have the independent critical thinking skills to handle outside social pressures that are telling her to conform to how the women and people act in said country. I've watched former girls I've dated get married to foreigners and all of them except one now has gotten divorced, and always after they got their permanent residency. I've watched my former expat coworkers and friends get married and bring them back to their home countries and they all have marriage issues now, these are what would be considered normal girls but lower educated or social strata. When I was in the Navy I saw the same thing and when I worked for some veteran offices I saw the same thing with the ones married to Filipinas, their life was a living hell or they were married but basically lived separate lives.

Personally I would not risk bringing back a lower socio-economic Filipina back to the states unless she was properly educated with some kind of useful job skill plus a reeducation that you do upon her as well to make sure she won't change into a monster after living in a Western country for a few years. This is why just talking over the internet or visiting for a few weeks then deciding to get a fiance visa is the biggest mistake a dude can make. I know guys are lonely but a lot of these women are shrewd and will play you like a fiddle and once they have their permanent residency she will drop you and move on to the guy she really wants to be with. There is less of a chance of this happening if she is from a middle class background and has halfway decent education that did not arise from you sending her to school after the fact.

If you are permanently living in PI or another non-Western country then you can get with or marry any kind of socio-economic educated girl cause you know she won't change much only what she gets from you being around her. I've learned my lesson the hard way through personal experience. In the future I would be very careful getting involved with a women that is not from the middle class of which ever country she is from. It's just too difficult to deal with the differences between each others life experiences and expectations. Yes, it can be done but one has to put a lot of time and effort fixing the deficiencies that someone growing up poor has to bring them up to middle class standards and be able to function appropriately in situations where middle class behaviors are needed, which is what one has to have to basically get by in a 1st world country nowadays. But like i said if you never plan to live in your home country again then it doesn't matter if she is educated or came from a poor family as long as she is compatible with you.

This book gives a well researched outline of how to deal with poverty and move and understand the different social stratas of poverty, middle-class and wealth/elite. It details how to communicate with each one and how one would be able to blend in with one or the other which you initially did not belong in:

http://www.amazon.com/Framework-Underst ... ng+poverty

Image

This is the last discussion post I'm responding to on this board because I'm essentially just a clown and only know how to blow up condoms into balloons and all my PI experiences are just jokes to laugh about and not be taken seriously and have no merit. Cause I really don't know what I'm talking about, I'm just a jokester, that's all.

You all can enjoy meandering your way through PI and figure it out yourself from now on.

This post is not against your remarks davewe, I just felt compelled to respond to you and give some last decent feedback before I cease operations on the Asian board. I'm done dealing with the numerous shleps on this board who only take, take, take but never give much of any useful advice or info themselves other than disparaging remarks and whatnot that cause continuing consternation on this board rather than insightful unification of information.


Whether for the Philippines or elsewhere, those few with years of experience living in-country,
who deal with locals on a daily basis, seem to be ignored as an annoying sideshow to the many who do not want reality checks on their fantasies and delusions. You actually have the forum owner and many others actually soliciting the return of idiotic banned racist clowns, with no known experience
living overseas, while someone with the rich expat experience of Mr. S could pass from the forum
with not so much as a nod.
A forum can serve as boredom relief and a sense of contact for those of us who live outside the US, as well as offer some satisfaction when actually helping aspiring expats who are actually looking for a life or wife, but if you were to evaluate content on this forum, I would be surprised if that kind of content comprised more than 10% of the total.
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Postby Cornfed » Fri Apr 18, 2014 5:25 pm

Mr S wrote:The poster said he was eventually going back to the states so from my personal experience the professional type girls have the best success rate with staying together over the long haul in a Western country. This is why I recommended it. Almost every single dude I know who has brought a non-professional or lower educated girl back to their home Western country has run into issues in their marriage and most of them got divorced. I believe there is a strong risk of the marriage going wrong and falling apart when the girl does not have some kind of skill that she can parlay into some kind of usefulness in the states or other Western country. Cause even if you have kids with them they will slowly go crazy being kept at home and if your not around a lot because of your job or business they will start finding other means to socialize with others. Those others could be feminized women who put alternative thoughts into her head, it could be random dudes always hitting on her when she is out on her own, it could be social media conversations that lead to other things.

Ideally you would want to have a community of non-scum individuals for your imported wife to interact with in order to avoid these problems. The same problems might occur in feminized professional settings. It would be good if people could stop thinking in terms of just themselves and any nuclear family they might have, and instead think of how to build and function in communities. For example, men who wanted to marry imported Filipinas could get together with other men in their location who wanted to or had done the same thing and arrange to socialize with and support each other while avoiding contact with Western skanks and PUA dirtbag types as one would avoid contact with sewer rats.
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Postby OutWest » Fri Apr 18, 2014 8:06 pm

Cornfed wrote:
Mr S wrote:The poster said he was eventually going back to the states so from my personal experience the professional type girls have the best success rate with staying together over the long haul in a Western country. This is why I recommended it. Almost every single dude I know who has brought a non-professional or lower educated girl back to their home Western country has run into issues in their marriage and most of them got divorced. I believe there is a strong risk of the marriage going wrong and falling apart when the girl does not have some kind of skill that she can parlay into some kind of usefulness in the states or other Western country. Cause even if you have kids with them they will slowly go crazy being kept at home and if your not around a lot because of your job or business they will start finding other means to socialize with others. Those others could be feminized women who put alternative thoughts into her head, it could be random dudes always hitting on her when she is out on her own, it could be social media conversations that lead to other things.

Ideally you would want to have a community of non-scum individuals for your imported wife to interact with in order to avoid these problems. The same problems might occur in feminized professional settings. It would be good if people could stop thinking in terms of just themselves and any nuclear family they might have, and instead think of how to build and function in communities. For example, men who wanted to marry imported Filipinas could get together with other men in their location who wanted to or had done the same thing and arrange to socialize with and support each other while avoiding contact with Western skanks and PUA dirtbag types as one would avoid contact with sewer rats.


In my experience, any major metro area in the US already has networks of "imported" Filipinas and
many have almost no close contact with non-filipinas even though they live in the USA.
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Postby Cornfed » Fri Apr 18, 2014 8:16 pm

OutWest wrote:In my experience, any major metro area in the US already has networks of "imported" Filipinas and
many have almost no close contact with non-filipinas even though they live in the USA.

Well, that is how you would want it. The idea would be to hermetically seal your community from the influences of Western pig slut females and their male counterparts. I don't see how it would be possible to do this if your wife were some kind of professional as suggested.
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Postby OutWest » Fri Apr 18, 2014 8:26 pm

Cornfed wrote:
OutWest wrote:In my experience, any major metro area in the US already has networks of "imported" Filipinas and
many have almost no close contact with non-filipinas even though they live in the USA.

Well, that is how you would want it. The idea would be to hermetically seal your community from the influences of Western pig slut females and their male counterparts. I don't see how it would be possible to do this if your wife were some kind of professional as suggested.


Yes, it actually makes it more difficult if she is working with some coven of American women. There is no shortage at all of possible social contact within these close Filipina networks, in fact there is more social activity than one can handle. My wife spent last summer with me in Oregon- she thinks most American women are awful. She will make use of her engineering skills, but it will not be in the US in any case.
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Postby publicduende » Fri Apr 18, 2014 8:54 pm

OutWest wrote:
Cornfed wrote:
OutWest wrote:In my experience, any major metro area in the US already has networks of "imported" Filipinas and
many have almost no close contact with non-filipinas even though they live in the USA.

Well, that is how you would want it. The idea would be to hermetically seal your community from the influences of Western pig slut females and their male counterparts. I don't see how it would be possible to do this if your wife were some kind of professional as suggested.


Yes, it actually makes it more difficult if she is working with some coven of American women. There is no shortage at all of possible social contact within these close Filipina networks, in fact there is more social activity than one can handle. My wife spent last summer with me in Oregon- she thinks most American women are awful. She will make use of her engineering skills, but it will not be in the US in any case.


Good point OW. Let's not forget another point: for how bad the influences of the "AW coven" can be, there should always be a strong counterweight in her husband's opinion and ideas. If a Filipina is young yet smart enough to understand the facts of life, she will look at where those 40-yo divorcees are sitting, for all their liberated mindset, the bitterness on their faces, the broken families...and work out the result on their own.

My wife Monica has been working as a project manager for almost 5 months now, with 2 British staff (both women, nonetheless) reporting to her. She's professionally as good as anybody else here in the UK. Yet, she has never picked up any of a typical British woman's bad habits. Why? Because she's smart enough to work out what's better and important not just to her, but us as a couple.

If a foreign woman cannot understand this on her own, she was either too young and vulnerable to get married and brought abroad, or she wasn't prime wife material in the first place.
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Postby OutWest » Fri Apr 18, 2014 9:05 pm

If a Filipina is young yet smart enough to understand the facts of life, she will look at where those 40-yo divorcees are sitting, for all their liberated mindset, the bitterness on their faces, the broken families...and work out the result on their own.

Those were EXACTLY my wife's observations... She observed that if she talks of loving and caring for her husband, American women acted like she was some kind of exploited fool.

Curiously, American teenage girls really like my wife...say things like "She is so cool!"
Maybe they have not had enough man-hating classes yet...
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Postby davewe » Fri Apr 18, 2014 11:45 pm

Mr S wrote:
This post is not against your remarks davewe, I just felt compelled to respond to you and give some last decent feedback before I cease operations on the Asian board. I'm done dealing with the numerous shleps on this board who only take, take, take but never give much of any useful advice or info themselves other than disparaging remarks and whatnot that cause continuing consternation on this board rather than insightful unification of information.


This is perhaps the weakness of forums, the internet, anonymous expertise and exists on every topic, everywhere but few places does it exist in larger doses than on HA?

Yes you have lived in PI a long time, as has Outwest and a few others. By definition that gives you some credibility, but it's not unlimited. Hell there are 300 million living in the US. Just because someone lives in the US does not mean I believe every thing he says about the country.

I have been on HA about 3 years and there's 2 or 3 people I have connected with and whose advise I have sought. There's a few others whose opinions I respect. That's it.

There is no such thing as an expert on PI, Filipinas, marriage, etc. if there were there wouldn't be a 50% divorce rate. As humans we all bump along and try our best. We each have unique experiences and by definition mine isn't yours.

I have several buddies who happily married Filipina nurses. It just didn't happen for me. Their experience is no more or less valid than mine.

What I believe I can say definitively about the Philippines and filipinas is that there is no rules or key to success. I know many successfully married guys and few of them followed the rules. If they'd followed the rules they never would have married a pinay in the first place.

Seeking guidance is a good thing. Just don't take is as absolute. I know guys who did everything wrong and it worked out right: large age gaps, economic gaps, educational gaps, religious gaps, cultural chasms, etc. I know guys who successfully married bar girls. It wouldn't be my preference but it worked for them.

I am lots older than most guys here. Perhaps by definition that means I have more experience than most. Think that means I am always listened to? Nope - nor do I expect to be.

So I hope you don't leave the forum. Your voice does have value. Just lower your expectations of how people should react to you. We are all different and your experience and views are different from mine.
Last edited by davewe on Sat Apr 19, 2014 6:56 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Postby newlifeinphilippines » Sat Apr 19, 2014 5:21 am

Mr S wrote:
newlifeinphilippines wrote:from what ive seen the ones with filipina wives that go out in the work force are influenced the most not the stay at home. much better to lock them up. why even bother getting a filipina if your gonna turn them into a professional back in America. a professional filipina isn't any different than an American woman except she was desperate enough to hitch onto our loser a** to get tehre.

Mr. s is a bit of a clown anyways he told me to go to angeles city looking for a bargirl girlfriend and saying how good they are cause i was complaining about lack of commanility and natural sexual desire from my filipina girl here. lol ive been there done that and no such thing exists its purely a sexual and money relationship, you might love them but tehy certainly wont love you.


Your comprehension skills are quite deficient. So I'm a clown because I tried to offer advice to your ineptitude regarding your consistent complaining that you want a good girl that is a slave and a whore with complete obedience but you can't find that cause you only are in the country for so many months and don't want to put the effort into sorting out and dating various women to find one so you just settle on the one you have and then bitch and complain that your former bar girl was such a good lay and blah blah blah, like every other post? So who is the real clown? Basically, I said go to AC since you are not serious about finding a girl who meets your criteria so you might as well just go to AC and find a girl who meets what you want cause your not going to find it in other cities sitting on your a** bitching and complaining about it. You might as well just send out your slave girl to bring new girls to you to vet if you can coerce her to do so, that way you can find out how obedient she really is and also find new girls without putting in any effort. Right? Sounds like a good plan.

And yes you can find girls up there in AC that can be halfway decent GF's if you work at it and know how to read people. It doesn't mean that a majority are like that but there is a small percentage maybe under 20% that would qualify if you looked hard enough and went with enough different girls. and i don't mean a few like you would have to get with a a new one every day or roughly that so lets say you got with between 25-30 girls in a month period. Maybe less than 5 are cool to hang out with more than once, and out of those 5 maybe 1 or 2 could be fixed up if you wanted to put the effort into it.

Look, you are exactly why long time posters with personal experience don't post much on this forum anymore because when we give sound advice from personal experience all your kind does is shit on it and think you know everything cause you've been in the country for a few months at best. You are the one asking for advice then when you don't like it or agree you attack the messenger and cast dispersions upon them. I've been living in PI more or less 10 years now. You find how many Western expats who have had the capability and means to figure out how to do this, especially with no work/residence/retirement visa, marriage certificate and get back to me.

I'm about had it with this board it's supposed to be asking for useful advice from others but then it just becomes a monkey throwing shit fest then everyone just gets the shaft when longtime posters with experience stop or limit divulging their wisdom.

I won't be posting new posts on the Asian board again for a long time. I tried to come back and see if anything changed but same old types of personal attacks for no reason other than not liking the advice given.


my point is a hoe from the bars do not make good girlfriends or even semi girlfriends. its just a long term sexual relationship like what i had before where the guy is in love and she isn't. It gets depressing after awhile and lots of jealousy and money issues arise. but it can be fun especially for a guy like me. but i wanted to try something else for a change. I just wish to find a girl who enjoys sex as much as my barhoe or is at least as hotter as my old girlfriend to make up for it. It seems like most of the girls on teh dating site aren't that hot or sexual and hte ones that are hot are either prudes, scammes, hookers, milfs, or getting overloaded with messages and lose interest fast from my experience so im not sure what to do at this point. keep up with the girl i have and waste my time and money or go back to hoes which is not what i want either but it can be fun but lonely or go back to dating sites which seems not good either.
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Postby Dash » Sat Apr 19, 2014 4:58 pm

I am not so much concerned with the girl being westernized or turning into a monster.

I feel my selection and screening skills are top notch. But then again shit can happen. Just do the best you can / be precocious and hope for the best.
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Postby Cornfed » Sat Apr 19, 2014 7:04 pm

Dash wrote:I am not so much concerned with the girl being westernized or turning into a monster.

I feel my selection and screening skills are top notch.

The trouble with such an approach is that females don't have any permanent character to speak of. Just as the size of some fish is determined by the size of the container in which they are kept, so the lousiness of females is determined by their environment.
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Postby Dash » Sat Apr 19, 2014 7:13 pm

Cornfed wrote:
Dash wrote:I am not so much concerned with the girl being westernized or turning into a monster.

I feel my selection and screening skills are top notch.

The trouble with such an approach is that females don't have any permanent character to speak of. Just as the size of some fish is determined by the size of the container in which they are kept, so the lousiness of females is determined by their environment.


dont agree with that. quite a limited sexest perspective you have there lol
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