Filipina MYTHS

Discuss culture, living, traveling, relocating, dating or anything related to the Asian countries - China, The Philippines, Thailand, etc.
newlifeinphilippines
Veteran Poster
Posts: 2419
Joined: December 13th, 2013, 3:06 pm

Post by newlifeinphilippines »

OutWest wrote:
newlifeinphilippines wrote:
OutWest wrote:
Taco wrote:
newlifeinphilippines wrote:please let me f**k this other girl i said i didn't love this other girl i just want to use her for sex.
That would make a great greeting card. Don't ever get married.

As I advise Filipinas I know (and I know some beauties)- "Most Western Men in the Philippines
just want to use you for sex and they will never love you."

It is amazing how many times I have heard Western men complain how difficult it is to meet
"quality" girls, but by their behavior they clearly show they would not be capable of a relationship
with a "quality" girl. The honest ones stick to bar girls- at least there are few pretenses there.

By definition, these kinds of pursuits will always be full of drama and trouble. It is comic of course,
and as the OP says, he DOES know how to keep a thread going.LOL
Most filipina women just want to get paid or a visa out and could care less about loving us. They are the bigger scammers in my book at least sex is something to be enjoyed between teh two no one wants to be treated like a walking ATM. Of course im sure all teh women you know are exceptions. Cause you only talk to educated filipinas who you can trust your life savings with :lol: :roll:
There are plenty of scamming Filipinas to be found, at least enough to go with the men who often deserve them, but there are others as well. As you say, you are not interested in taking the time to find that kind, which is your option. You say you simply want to fill your 6 month vacation with a lot of sex and I am sure you will realize all of that. So you are right, it is a matter of life goals. One's life experiences do tend to be self-predictive at any rate. The thing that is odd, is that you seem to discredit the experiences of others in some attempt to make your own experience more legitimate.
So your REALLY know that some "old guy" is just being scammed? Do you? I know of a number of such marriages that are in their second decade and the girl shows no sign of walking. I would say that the girls open to an easy lay are pretty likely to be scammers, so again, your experience may be self-selecting.

Some men may have a far different experience because they approach with far different goals and
a completely different mindset. That does not make you less free to go for what you want.
As you say, you know how to generate a buzz online. Most of us do not have a clue how to do that.
There are also men who know how to generate love in the heart of a woman. Maybe you don't want to do that (6 months only) or do not know how. Things like this account for very different life experiences either way. You went to have a good time. Can I say that you are not really having it?
Some men go places in search of love. How do you know what they really find?

I know all kinds of girls- from poor to rich, and their are quality hearts to be found at all levels.
By your own admission, you are here to have a good time, lots of sex, and a vacation girlfriend or two. Presumably that is more rewarding than what you would be doing back in the states. Whether true or not, you come across as a player, and do not seem interested in what makes girls outside that realm tick. That may be because you are the young player or just looking for that sex vacation.
Girls (and their families) from outside that world tick quite differently. They have an uncanny ability to spot players and mongers and will say very clearly that they have NO interest in being some foreigner's vacation GF, no matter how fat his wallet.

It's a big country, with 100 million people. I have seen all kinds of scammers and rip-offs.
I have also seen girls with amazing character and heart. I married one.
I know of a girl from Davao that was courted by a humble obviously somewhat poor man from the USA. He has zero cash to flash. Raquel is a very beautiful girl and her friends chided her, telling her she could do much better. "Raquel, you are so luck! You are so pretty you can attract any man you want- get a lawyer or doctor!" She replied that Greg was poor, but the best man she had ever met.
They did make fun of her a lot though. They were married in a very modest church wedding in Davao. In about 9 months she flew to the USA to join him. A little bit of a surprise was waiting for her.

It turns out that her new husband was not totally honest with her. She wrote that she was totally shocked. Turned out that Mr Greg was a multimillionaire with large farms, an airplane and a lot of real estate otherwise. They both had chosen wisely. And no, she has not run off and divorced him. They are happily married with three children. That is not some men's cup of tea of course.

Why are players so sure that "Those other men are being scammed..."? Those other men have different purposes in life, so the results vary. It is as silly for one of those "other men" or one of the "old guys" to insist that the sex you talk about is all a fabrication.

Without knowing, you sound young, not at all interested in marriage, and looking for a good time.
There is plenty to be found for you in the Philippines. I know of one man from Phoenix that made 17 trips to the Philippines in less than two years...I think he was looking for a good time...LOL

BTW...if you can consistently get a buzz going online, you could bottle that stuff and sell it!
ts always been like this even when i was a teen i would get major internet forums talking about me on totally unrelated topics to this stuff LOL must be my personality. Yes i do bottle it online quite literally LOL

Yes there are exceptions to the rule but id say most women are scammers if there is a large age gap. If i was old and with a 25 year old id would assume she loves her local filipino more than me. I can accept that when i get older I will not delude myself like you guys :) Even without a large age gap there is lots of scammers so it would only be more likely the larger the age gap.

I wold like to be in a loving relationship and monogamous but with a great girl, but im very picky in looks and most importantly sex. sex and looks often is inversely related to quality unfortunately so i guess ill never be happy if i want a relationship here. Its hard to find a girl who really enjoys sex the way i want who is also hot. Often these types are low hanging fruit. Also another problem is I and many others dont live here. Its alot of time and work to court a good girl and if you are doing many you could spend months mostly on boring dates. . Why waste a whole vacation dating good girls and come home possibly empty handed i want to get bang for my buck since i dont live here. Nothing worse wasting thousands of dollars and months sitting alone in your hotel. Thats why i may not come back for awhile if i dont come back for my gf cause im scared to come back here and wind up alone in my room. If i want a companion to keep my company and to justify not being alone and spending all this money i just wind up with low hanging fruit again. I couldn't get anything done work or otherwise when i was with milf girl for those 5 days. I could only imagine how hard it would be if i was jugglign many dates for months to find the right woman for me. I guess if your retired it wont matter but i work online so need to keep up with my work and sanity.
droid
Elite Upper Class Poster
Posts: 3127
Joined: September 19th, 2013, 11:38 pm

Post by droid »

OutWest wrote:
droid wrote:
MrS wrote:As I previously mentioned, this is an option if you want to meet well-off connected locals, I didn't say how easy or inexpensive it would be. If you want to meet teens and early twenty somethings then enroll in some Uni classes
Copy that, thanks again
You do not even need to enroll in classes. Some years back I had an apartment a block or two away
from Xavier University in Cagayan de Oro. There was a full-on SWARM of girls around all the time. For teens and early twenty-somethings, it was like WOW!
Priceless man. I'll try that if I can.
Like I've said my plan is too look busy with my laptop or some other activities, not just hovering around like a creep. But it's true, I'll be coding in my laptop quite a bit, as there are some projects I haven't been able to work on before due to my job.
OutWest wrote: As far as meeting well-off connected locals, do not bother if you don't have the money. It;s not
easy even if you can afford it. There are other alternatives. The well-off and connected families
did not get that way overnight, and they tend to be careful about outsiders. It just takes time.
But then again, a lot of them are total pond scum...lol, so who cares?
Yeah my budget will be about $1K per month tops.
It'd probably take $5-$10K/month to kind of keep up with some of those well-off I would guess.
1)Too much of one thing defeats the purpose.
2)Everybody is full of it. What's your hypocrisy?
newlifeinphilippines
Veteran Poster
Posts: 2419
Joined: December 13th, 2013, 3:06 pm

Post by newlifeinphilippines »

Droid sorry to burst your bubble but if your plan is to hover around on your computer the ONLY girl that will approach you is a hoe or scammer or a girl that looks like the maid and that is if your lucky most girls here are shy so often wont even approach. In other words your still gonna have to initiate things if you want real quality.
OutWest
Veteran Poster
Posts: 2429
Joined: March 19th, 2011, 12:09 am
Location: Asia/USA

Post by OutWest »

droid wrote:
OutWest wrote:
droid wrote:
MrS wrote:As I previously mentioned, this is an option if you want to meet well-off connected locals, I didn't say how easy or inexpensive it would be. If you want to meet teens and early twenty somethings then enroll in some Uni classes
Copy that, thanks again
You do not even need to enroll in classes. Some years back I had an apartment a block or two away
from Xavier University in Cagayan de Oro. There was a full-on SWARM of girls around all the time. For teens and early twenty-somethings, it was like WOW!
Priceless man. I'll try that if I can.
Like I've said my plan is too look busy with my laptop or some other activities, not just hovering around like a creep. But it's true, I'll be coding in my laptop quite a bit, as there are some projects I haven't been able to work on before due to my job.
OutWest wrote: As far as meeting well-off connected locals, do not bother if you don't have the money. It;s not
easy even if you can afford it. There are other alternatives. The well-off and connected families
did not get that way overnight, and they tend to be careful about outsiders. It just takes time.
But then again, a lot of them are total pond scum...lol, so who cares?
Yeah my budget will be about $1K per month tops.
It'd probably take $5-$10K/month to kind of keep up with some of those well-off I would guess.
If you are looking for a nice girl, I think you are underestimating the directness with which you
may express yourself. First of all, by your manners, dress and conversation, make it clear that you
are not the player or monger type. When you are in a "target rich" area, you do not need to worry about "being a creep" That is brainwashing from the USA...shaming BS to cripple honest ambition.

If you see know of a girl you are interested in, do NOT approach her directly at first. It's simple.
Ask her co-worker, friend or fellow student if she is single. If she is at all interested in you as a possibility, they will do a lot of the heavy lifting for you. Don't work so hard. Relax.

>>>there are a lot of preconceptions at work. SET YOURSELF APART! If you are really looking for a good girl, be sure at some point to use the words SINCERE and MARRIAGE MINDED.

Once you begin to have a direct conversation with a girl you are interested in, make a point of asking her about her family. This is not just being polite. It will also tell you a great deal about her. This is true anywhere in Asia. It also begins to establish in her mind that you are a gentleman.
If you are to the point where it would seem ok to ask her out to get a coffee or lunch, make a point to say that she should bring a friend...for a chaperone, you say with a smile. A girl from a nice family will find this very sincere and charming. Imagine, a foreigner who is such a gentleman that he recognizes old tradition, even if she does not see the need for it.

Make a point of THIS: Ask her about her father. Observe how she speaks him. If they are obviously close, make a point of telling her you look forward to meet her father. Make it clear that you would want her father to approve.

>>>Be respectful and diplomatic when speaking of or dealing with family.

If you have gotten to this point with a girl you are really interested in, you are getting to a point 99% of foreign men in the Philippines will NEVER know. If the girl is a keeper, you are beginning to
know what courtship is...you are beginning to write your own love story. This is NOT "going on a date." You are then are your way to winning a girl's heart a way that most ignore. You have earned the respect of her family. They will talk about you. This amazing man that she has met...that you are "different" than the other foreigners they know. When you go to see her at her place of work, school, or a gathering of her friends, you will know by the looks they give you how things are going.
When you find a keeper and her friends and family know all about you from what she has told them, well, you have obviously won her heart.

This is all a long long ways from all the dating crap in the USA, and with the right girl, it's a good place to be.
Last edited by OutWest on July 7th, 2014, 6:25 pm, edited 1 time in total.
newlifeinphilippines
Veteran Poster
Posts: 2419
Joined: December 13th, 2013, 3:06 pm

Post by newlifeinphilippines »

I agree about the father issue. Most girls here who are scammers/hoes/gold diggers or some other issue have father issues. All the girls ive met had father issues except one church girl who had a level head and was not desperate for a foreigner, coincidence? I think not.
hammanta
Junior Poster
Posts: 652
Joined: July 14th, 2013, 9:36 am
Location: East Coast of USA

Post by hammanta »

If you see know of a girl you are interested in, do NOT approach her directly at first. It's simple.
Ask her co-worker, friend or fellow student if she is single. If she is at all interested in you as a possibility, they will do a lot of the heavy lifting for you. Don't work so hard. Relax.
I think this is a very good point. I still say direct approach works better in Philippines than in America, but the use of friends and co workers is a gold mine.

My very first day in the Philippines I was 19 sitting in Bubba Gumps in Makati with my friends dad and his filipina wife. I tell my friend's dad that I think a lot of the girls are cute. He says ok hold on. He ask's the filpino bar tender which girls are single and the guy pointed to a few of them. Friend's dad then ask's the guy to go tell them I find them attractive and ask them if they are single (I'm paraphrasing of course, can't remember the actual convo). By this point I'm hunched over in embarrassment. The bar tender whispers to the girls, they look over smile and giggle and wave back to me. The rest of the time they kept looking over while I had my meal. At that time I was a newbie and still had that defeatist attitude. I never approached the girls. I was use to failure but also baffled as to how that simple gesture of asking the girl's co worker could work so well. My friend's dad said that was his go to move and it works very well. My friend's dad had been to the Philippines multiple times and that is where I get a lot of my insight from.
newlifeinphilippines
Veteran Poster
Posts: 2419
Joined: December 13th, 2013, 3:06 pm

Post by newlifeinphilippines »

you must have a lot of money or someone paying for your vacations to go so young all these times. :)

keep in mind hammanta at 24 and good looking (seen teh pics) you dont represent the usual foreigner so youd have success anywhere not just phil.
hammanta
Junior Poster
Posts: 652
Joined: July 14th, 2013, 9:36 am
Location: East Coast of USA

Post by hammanta »

newlifeinphilippines wrote:you must have a lot of money or someone paying for your vacations to go so young all these times. :)

keep in mind hammanta at 24 and good looking (seen teh pics) you dont represent the usual foreigner so youd have success anywhere not just phil.
Let's say I'm a hard worker and know how to save money. No one fund's my trips. The hardest part is getting the time off.

And I'm not disregarding that my age and looks help me but the advice was coming from a 43 year old slightly overweight average looking white guy who has had a lot more experience than me in the country. The guy does represent the average foreigner, and believe it or not I've had several girls flake on me because they thought I was a player or a "bad" guy, whatever that means. The half chinese girl I was with would have preferred me to be 35-40, and kept telling me I was too young.
Billy
Experienced Poster
Posts: 1144
Joined: January 21st, 2012, 10:01 am

Post by Billy »

Nice I am 40, let´s see..... Don´t want to derail the thread just a quick question. What do you guys think of Dumaguete? - It´s called: the place where the gentle people live. It´s quite popular with Expats. Is it a good place for long time stay?
hammanta
Junior Poster
Posts: 652
Joined: July 14th, 2013, 9:36 am
Location: East Coast of USA

Post by hammanta »

Billy wrote:Nice I am 40, let´s see..... Don´t want to derail the thread just a quick question. What do you guys think of Dumaguete? - It´s called: the place where the gentle people live. It´s quite popular with Expats. Is it a good place for long time stay?
I've never been to Dumaguete but have heard it is a decent city. Plenty of colleges so a lot of young women to be had. It also is a rather small city so if you are not familiar with the Philippines then you might not be comfortable with the lack of first world amenities. That is just my take with regards to other cities similar in size but like I have said I've never been there.
davewe
Experienced Poster
Posts: 1437
Joined: July 26th, 2011, 7:21 pm

Post by davewe »

hammanta wrote:
Billy wrote:Nice I am 40, let´s see..... Don´t want to derail the thread just a quick question. What do you guys think of Dumaguete? - It´s called: the place where the gentle people live. It´s quite popular with Expats. Is it a good place for long time stay?
I've never been to Dumaguete but have heard it is a decent city. Plenty of colleges so a lot of young women to be had. It also is a rather small city so if you are not familiar with the Philippines then you might not be comfortable with the lack of first world amenities. That is just my take with regards to other cities similar in size but like I have said I've never been there.
Actually, while not very large (120,000 I think) Dumaguete has plenty of Western-style amenities. 4 colleges, good Internet (well good for the Philippines), decent and cheap transportation, good medical, malls, restaurants, etc. Does it have a girlie bar on every corner? No. But I doubt you'd need it.

However, if you need a large metro area with the equally large clubbing scene, it might not be for you. But I liked the city very much.
davewe
Experienced Poster
Posts: 1437
Joined: July 26th, 2011, 7:21 pm

Post by davewe »

OutWest wrote:
If you are looking for a nice girl, I think you are underestimating the directness with which you
may express yourself. First of all, by your manners, dress and conversation, make it clear that you
are not the player or monger type. When you are in a "target rich" area, you do not need to worry about "being a creep" That is brainwashing from the USA...shaming BS do cripple honest ambition.

If you see know of a girl you are interested in, do NOT approach her directly at first. It's simple.
Ask her co-worker, friend or fellow student if she is single. If she is at all interested in you as a possibility, they will do a lot of the heavy lifting for you. Don't work so hard. Relax.

>>>there are a lot of preconceptions at work. SET YOURSELF APART! If you are really looking for a good girl, be sure at some point to use the words SINCERE and MARRIAGE MINDED.

Once you begin to have a direct conversation with a girl you are interested in, make a point of asking her about her family. This is not just being polite. It will also tell you a great deal about her. This is true anywhere in Asia. It also begins to establish in her mind that you are a gentleman.
If you are to the point where it would seem ok to ask her out to get a coffee or lunch, make a point to say that she should bring a friend...for a chaperone, you say with a smile. A girl from a nice family will find this very sincere and charming. Imagine, a foreigner who is such a gentleman that he recognizes old tradition, even if she does not see the need for it.

Make a point of THIS: Ask her about her father. Observe how she speaks him. If they are obviously close, make a point of telling her you look forward to meet her father. Make it clear that you would want her father to approve.

>>>Be respectful and diplomatic when speaking of or dealing with family.

If you have gotten to this point with a girl you are really interested in, you are getting to a point 99% of foreign men in the Philippines will NEVER know. If the girl is a keeper, you are beginning to
know what courtship is...you are beginning to write your own love story. This is NOT "going on a date." You are then are your way to winning a girl's heart a way that most ignore. You have earned the respect of her family. They will talk about you. This amazing man that she has met...that you are "diffferent" than the other foreigners they know. When you go to see her at her place of work, school, or a gathering of her friends, you will know by the looks they give you how things are going.
When find a keeper and her friends and family know all about you from what she has told them, well, you have obviously won her heart.

This is all a long long ways from all the dating crap in the USA, and with the right girl, it's a good place to be.
Outwest is, as usual, dishing out priceless information. You should compile his postings.

The unfortunate thing is that most will either ignore or not believe him.
droid
Elite Upper Class Poster
Posts: 3127
Joined: September 19th, 2013, 11:38 pm

Post by droid »

newlifeinphilippines wrote:Droid sorry to burst your bubble but if your plan is to hover around on your computer the ONLY girl that will approach you is a hoe or scammer or a girl that looks like the maid and that is if your lucky most girls here are shy so often wont even approach. In other words your still gonna have to initiate things if you want real quality.
You sound like Taco, all Doom&Gloom lol. I don't have a problem approaching if the girls are at least half-sane. All I was saying was I want to make a decent presentation, as opposed to just lurking aimlessly around.

If the attention I get is any like the one I got in china, I should have no problem...
Last edited by droid on July 7th, 2014, 9:11 pm, edited 1 time in total.
1)Too much of one thing defeats the purpose.
2)Everybody is full of it. What's your hypocrisy?
droid
Elite Upper Class Poster
Posts: 3127
Joined: September 19th, 2013, 11:38 pm

Post by droid »

OutWest wrote:>>>there are a lot of preconceptions at work. SET YOURSELF APART! If you are really looking for a good girl, be sure at some point to use the words SINCERE and MARRIAGE MINDED.
Thanks for all the advice. Although I'm not really marriage-minded (yet), instead more of an "intermediate" here. Not the huge pump-and-dump fest of WnD/MrS, but not marrying either.

I just think dating several girls and taking 'em places, go visit volcanoes etc. is gotta be doable. I can't think the only options are the two extremes.
I guess i'm a semi-monger; I have to confess I'm the type of guy that after years wasted in the anglo-sphere, now feels the need to "make-up" for it with younger chix. But one thing I wouldn't do is lie by promising marriage etc.

All you are a lot more experienced, so please forgive me if I sound juvenile or don't make sense.
Last edited by droid on July 7th, 2014, 9:12 pm, edited 2 times in total.
1)Too much of one thing defeats the purpose.
2)Everybody is full of it. What's your hypocrisy?
Billy
Experienced Poster
Posts: 1144
Joined: January 21st, 2012, 10:01 am

Post by Billy »

davewe wrote:
hammanta wrote:
Billy wrote:Nice I am 40, let´s see..... Don´t want to derail the thread just a quick question. What do you guys think of Dumaguete? - It´s called: the place where the gentle people live. It´s quite popular with Expats. Is it a good place for long time stay?
I've never been to Dumaguete but have heard it is a decent city. Plenty of colleges so a lot of young women to be had. It also is a rather small city so if you are not familiar with the Philippines then you might not be comfortable with the lack of first world amenities. That is just my take with regards to other cities similar in size but like I have said I've never been there.
Actually, while not very large (120,000 I think) Dumaguete has plenty of Western-style amenities. 4 colleges, good Internet (well good for the Philippines), decent and cheap transportation, good medical, malls, restaurants, etc. Does it have a girlie bar on every corner? No. But I doubt you'd need it.

However, if you need a large metro area with the equally large clubbing scene, it might not be for you. But I liked the city very much.
Thanks. I read it´s a good start for newbies as it´s not that alien as there are many expats living there. Actually I don´t want to move to different places like a headless chicken. I want to make a good decision and be in one place where it´s ok. Moving around is quite a stress.
Post Reply
  • Similar Topics
    Replies
    Views
    Last post

Return to “Asia, China, Philippines, Thailand”