Discuss culture, living, traveling, relocating, dating or anything related to the Asian countries - China, The Philippines, Thailand, etc.
It seems that without a good education and a decent job in Japan, as well as decent looks, a foreigner cannot do well in Japan for the long term. That is the impression Japan has given me.
For the record, is my only option in Japan teaching English, since I do have a bachelors degree and am a fluent native English speaker. I am not white, but Asian-American and that might help to a degree.
Can anyone else with experience living in Japan elaborate on employment and staying for the long term in Japan?
Philippines is not a favorite destination for the Japanese. My wife also does not like it. In Cebu I see a lot of Koreans, but only a few Japanese.
Those few Japanese men with Japanese wife usually stay in very expensive hotels in Mactan and are out for golf and diving.
Some Japanese men travelling as singles have a very bad reputation in Philippines - I saw a few in Cebu who are clearly criminals. Sex, gambling, guns etc.
Despite Philippines is very near there are only a few flights a day and these flights are also half empty, except during Christmas and Easter, when they are sold out with overseas workers visiting their relatives.
Specifically what I was talking about is women generally don't travel to find husbands. They may move to another part of the country or to another town nearby but seldom do they jump on airplanes.
So in that sense they are "stuck" with their own men, unless different men travel to their country. As I said for the amount of foreign men that travel to Japan, there are plenty of women available for them; there is no scarcity, just add the ability to speak the language and your off and running.
Nobody is going to have women of any country, not even their home country, a 100% of the female population between 18-40 interested in them.
So it's ridiculous to assume that, if you find yourself in Japan, single, somewhat attractive and employed (transferred); dating Japanese women shouldn't be an issue.
Now experiencing Japanese P4P is another story and most Westerners do not have access.
Well, this depends solely on your wallet, it has nothing to do if you are Japanese or not. Japanese upper class prostitution is VERY expensive, but there are plenty of other simple Asian girls in Japan, who are not Japanese, like Filipina, Thai, Chinese and others and they are much cheaper than Japanese high class girls.
Westerners for sure have access to prostitution in Japan and unlike in most parts in USA, prostitution is not illegal in Japan.
Japanese sex-services are operating a large internet information network, they are easy to find, even for foreigners. Some of them which accept foreigners have even English homepages.
There are also plenty of cheap girls waiting for men near railway/subway stations in the suburbs of Tokyo. I am a white foreigner, not so young anymore, 60+, and frequently when I go home alone after shopping past 10 PM, Chinese and Filipina girls will approach me. Plenty of girls in Japan who are waiting for customers. No discrimination.
I was mostly talking about classic services like brothels and geisha girls.
The cheaper options are easy to find as you say.
If the p4p with homepages in English in fact offer Japanese girls to gaijin, then DJ stands corrected.
If they offer SEA girls only, then you failed to make a point.
In other words the enticement is not Japan but Japanese women specifically since they can presumably visit the sex industry in another country for a lower per unit cost but not their ultimate physical fantasy. If the proverbial school girl by day sex worker by night Japanese girl does not make herself available to non Japanese what good is she to the sex tourist?
Well again I have actually traveled to Japan and I can tell you most western sites bash on Japan and spread more crap about them than is actually true.
Many sites by western people even claim Japanese men are a bunch of rapists but in reality the rates of rape and pedophilia in Japan are lower than any whites country.
I have been there myself and I don't really give a crap about some western idiots creating a thread about the "reality" of Japanese people.
I have been to Japan myself and I will base the people of the people themselves and their country.
Not base them off some English person writing negative things about them on the internet.
They do offer Japanese girls to foreign men in Tokyo of course, and there are homepages in English too, but the question is if the foreigner is willing to pay. Japan is not Philippines or Thailand.
It also should be noticed, it is not the escort service, but the girl who makes the final decision, if she accepts the customer.
Rates for upper class Japanese escort services, for example for university students, about 20 - 24 years old in Tokyo, are starting with about USD 500,- to USD 1500,- depending on time (usually 2 to 7 hours). No tips are expected.
Services in Tokyo with girls from Philippine, Thai or China are much cheaper, starting with USD 100,- or so (yen 10.000,-), but these girls will persistently ask you for some extra tip, paying for drinks in a bar, they will also ask you to pay for the love-hotel room (usually 3 hours) etc.
Up to you - all is possible in Japan, but be aware, nightlife is not cheap here!
Last edited by Yohan on Sun Jul 20, 2014 3:50 am, edited 3 times in total.
Thank you for your very true and considerate comment. Japan is a very safe country.
In Tokyo you can go out day and night, regardless if in parks, harbour, entertainment areas, temples etc., regardless if you are an old man, a young woman or a child. The crime rate, Japan:USA - prison population etc. is about 1 : 20.
I do not know even one corner in all Metropolitan Tokyo after living here almost 4 decades which I consider dangerous for women and children because of criminals.
Most crimes in Japan happen among family members or among co-workers at the work place.
I never had any problem in Japan, criminality against foreigners is almost zero.
(Maybe I posted this already and forgot about it, in which case you can delete this post)
I think the guy who wrote that article sounds more spoiled than the women he's complaining about. Some guys will never be satisfied.
"Ugly reality" is that she asked you to buy her rice balls? A post title like "ugly reality" makes me think of stolen kidneys, or gaining 400 pounds, or boiling your pets on the stove like in that movie.
Let's get together and feel alright.
I remember reading a quote from one of the early Europeans to go to Japan, maybe French alone Roman Catholic priest. He said European girls kept their virginity, but Japanese girls didn't consider it very important. Koreans say the little blanket on the Japanese kimono is there because a long time ago after a war, there was a decree that any many could ask a single woman to have sex with him, and they'd use the blanket on the side of the kimono. There is a lot of ill will from Koreans toward Japan due to the most recent colonization up through WWII. So I don't know if this is true. But Japan has long had a reputation for loose women.
As far as Asian cultures go that are female dominated versus male dominated, it seems like Chinese women can be 'tiger ladies' and have control in the home, even if society is male dominated on the outside of the home. Korea seems to be the same way based on some of their television programs, though I've seen households where the man is depicted as being in charge.
Virginity was traditionally important in China. I think it was in Korea. I don't know to what extent it is true now. I'd guess more South Koreans are virgins than Americans at marriage, but I don't know.
The Philippines seems male dominated but some women expect to be given the money to manage the home. If you earn a decent (American) salary, giving her an allowance for the home may fit her cultural requirements just fine. If you want to marry, you can lay down the law before you get engaged and set expectations for managing funds.
I think some of the Indonesian homes have the husband give the wife the check to manage. If you have a trustworthy, caring, thrifty wife, it doesn't matter. I've had a joint account with my wife. When we lived in Indonesia, I let her handle the finances because they don't pay bills through the mail and the bank closes at 4 or 4:30, and you go to the bank to pay the electric bill and other things. There are lines, and it's just an inefficient system. It never made sense to me. But she didn't buy new furniture without asking my permission either. Now, she'll spend money on regular purchases. If she wants to buy something as big of a purchase as a sheet, she'll usually call and ask if it's okay.
No matter what ethnicity you marry, you can let her know how it's going to be before you get married. It makes sense to talk about how a household should be managed. And you don't have to promise her anything, like, "If we get married, the finances...." If you haven't proposed talking about yourselves getting married seems to be too much to me. If you are engaged, you'd say "When we get married." But sex and money, IMO, need to be discussed before you get married. You can say, "When I get married, I want to do X and I expect my wife to do Y" in the third person-- no commitment, etc. "When you get married, do you want your husband to X." That's a way to ask her. It's clear what you are getting at, but it's a little less committal. And hopefully if it doesn't work out you can let her down just a tiny bit easier than if you were making less hypothetical wedding plans. You can talk to a friend about what she wants to do when she marries... someone, not necessarily you.
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