I never had to compete for women, of course, but I wonder if this is really an issue in the Philippines? Women seem so willing, and so abundent... is there actually fierce competition even in the Philippines? Because it seems to make like any Joe Schmoe can get a Filipina lady in the Phils, just sayin'. Jakarta is more of an "unknown" destiniation compared to Bangkok and Manila, but wherever you go there will always be foreigners. Bravely going where no (few) men have gone before.newlifeinphilippines wrote:Jakarta looks like its a mongering destination thats probably the only thing it offers is very few foreigners competing compared to manila?
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Discuss culture, living, traveling, relocating, dating or anything related to the Asian countries - China, The Philippines, Thailand, etc.
Well the few filipinas that actively go for foreigners usually have been ran through at least one foreigner. Its not like there is tons of foreigners but Im very high standards on looks so i need every edge i can get. I wont settle for anything less than a hot 7 with no kids and for that edge i need to go where foreigners aren't around throwing money at these hoes.
and indonesia jakarta has 20 million people and i think far less foreigners than manila or at least white foreigners so maybe better chance there.
Yes Indonesia seems relatively less discovered. So is Malaysia. Vietnam / Vietnamese females are less talked about, so next year when I go there it will be venturing into the relatively unknown. Perhaps there is still a Western stigma against the country? I bet if China were not so capitalistic today there would still be a Western stigma against it too. My plan is permanent relocation and as I have said I am a serious, marriage minded individual.
I think you will have a harder time NewLife in Indonesia than the Philippines. Indonesia is largely Muslim so there goes a lot of potential out the window. Then it comes down to looks. Indonesians seem to be a bit darker, tribal, and shorter than even Filipinas, though this is based off of pure speculation as well as dating sites. I'm sure there are plenty of mixes, however, especially in Jakarta. And then of course take into content what Falcon said about cultural differences. You will have to compete with other East and South Asians.
Doesn't matter dude. Jakarta is the 2nd largest metro area IN THE WORLD. 28 million in great jakarta area, even more fi you count nearby areas.
yes that is one thing ive considered is the muslim and the less attractive perspective. But the dating sites can weed through most of that. Ive taken a look at jakarta and there were attractive christian women. Just imagine if a christian guy actually came and met a woman in jakarta. He would truly be special. Whereas in manila? Nothing special. Im white and these girls wont settle for a singaporean or chinese if they can get a westerner.
and before anyone mentions the provinces of philippines as better idea. First off I need a cheap hotel with good reliable internet and electricity for my work to check everyday or do. And its already bad enough for my work in the main metro cities. Plus i like the convenines of taxis and huge malls. If i was retired maybe i can sit on a beach and daygame women all day but until im retired 100 percent thats not ideal.
Last edited by newlifeinphilippines on November 13th, 2014, 9:20 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Actually Indonesia was a Dutch colony for 400 years, and the Dutch are some of the largest and biggest boned people in the world. There's been a lot of interracial marriages, sleeping around, mistresses over the course of the centuries. As a result, the average Indonesian is a little taller and more robust then the average Filipino. There's also literally hundreds of ethnic groups, each with their own unique characteristics. The tribal look and shorter\darker thing simply isn't correct; there's a lot of variation, as much if not more then in the Philippines.
The Muslim faith is a matter of concern, certainly, but there's a lot of Christian and Hindu girls who are a lot more laid-back and easy going. Most will likely be somewhat conservative, regardless of their religious status. They are marriage oriented and not mongerable for the most part. I am not sure how cost of living is in Indonesia\Jakarta, but it can't be much.
Interesting didn't know there was so much variation.
BTW there was a indonesian girl at the airport i manila and i thought she was way hotter than most filipinas light skinned and classy looking (not chinese) and nice eyes and mannerisms.
Then that may be a place I need to put down on my list. Maybe I've been mistaken about Indonesian girls. I've also heard that Bahasa is a relatively easy language to learn as well.
Lets cut through the B.S once and for all. First off falcon is trying to hide the country but with over 200 million it wont matter if a few of us show up. Its 2.5 times the population of phil and has the same amount of foreigners as phil and most of those are in bali some island near australia. Very few foreigners are working there or living there or staying there for more than a week in bali. Indonesia is really huge you could get lost in that place.
Asiansexdiary just did a huge porno shoot in jakarta. The same as he does all over asia. He did one in hong kong too. Indonesia is pretty liberal in some spots. Dont mind falcon he never has seen a bar and lives in the villages cause he can't afford the Jakarta life AND is asian with ugly taste (which everyone else has concluded) in women probably cause thats all he can afford out in his rinky podink village. I definitely think indonesia will be the next phil. By the time everyone figures it out ill be onto vietnam which is the next phil after indonesia.
yes thats why i think indonesia maybe will be "mongered" or taken over by foreigners first. Then once that is done vietnam will be next. vietnam is very persecutive to christians and outsiders.
Like someone pointed out, my wife is Indonesian. She's a head-turner, too, but a faithful one. She tells m sometimes men look at her with interest. She'll look away or mention her husband if she has a conversation with them. She's in her late 30's now. I saw a girl I used to like in college whose a few years older than her, a white woman. My wife has 'held up' a lot better looks wise. I think that's a benefit of marrying an Asian if she takes care of her skin like my wife does. She's never been fat, except a pregnancy belly and just a few pounds of extra fat during that. Nothing like your typical American woman for gaining weight.
Honestly, though, my wife is the best looking woman in her whole family. I'm biased, I know. But I went to a family reunion of hundreds and hundreds of people. Back when we were in our 20's, she had a few, maybe four of cousins who were 'marriagably good looking' as far as my preference for looks. And a couple of them became my adopted sisters, so I'd better stop there. I got 'adopted' by her uncle and aunt to join the people-group so I could marry her. They gave me a family name. Mentioning that is a good way to build rapport with the Batak if you meet one. Then they determine what relatives have your family name, ask what generation you are, and figure out what to call you (older brother, grandpa, etc.)
I'm picky about looks. Most women other men find attractive enough to date wouldn't have interested me that much when I was single. Of course, I was dating to marry and wanted to marry someone I was really attracted to. On a US college campus as a young man, I'd see lots and lots of women I'd find rather attractive. On a college campus in Indonesia as a young man, maybe I'd see a third or a fifth as many. That's just for my personal tastes. I really like Indonesians as people, though.
Culturally, though, there are a lot of pluses. It's considered the norm for both male and female to be virgins before marriage. Of course there are 'bad girls' and prostitutes in just about any city. There are slutty girls who sleep with multiple expats they meet in clubs and prostitutes on the side of the road In certain areas, or so I hear. Prostitution wasn't really all around and all that obvious. I did get hit up by the owner of a losmen (cheap inn) to hire a prostitute, once. I refused the offer. My wife told me some of the women hanging out beside the ramp of a highway were probably prostitutes. That stuff goes on.
But if you want to game girls into bed, I don't think Indonesia, even Jakarta, is right for you. I don't want you to go there and mess up the country where my wife's relatives and a lot of my friends live anyway. So if you are a monger, please stay away. It's a better place for looking for a non-slutty, traditional wife.
My wife told me if an Indonesian woman says she can't cook, she's embarrassed, because she's a woman and women are supposed to know how to cook. Islam is the majority religion. I noticed when I worked with middle aged women in the office how they'd talk about all the stuff they cooked at home, especially the special foods for night and morning meals during Rahmaddan, when they fast during the daytime. The women brought a hotplate once and cooked lunch that way. Other offices commented on the smell, so they did shabu-shabu in a boiled pot after that. I could tell even though they worked they were domestically oriented. And lots of women stay home with the kids, too.
If Indonesians made jokes about sex, they were usually jokes about sex in marriage, teasing newlyweds. Like I said, virginity is expected. There are jokes about newly weds having sex. Married couples are expected to have sex (not stop having sex at marriage, an idea that might actual implant itself in someone's mind in the slutty culture of the west). In general, it is believed that women should submit to their husbands. But like any marriage, you have to set the boundaries and expectations for that while you are dating and right after you get married. Women are women. Indonesian women can get PMS and they can get bossy if you let them just like any woman from any country, and of course there are emotionally unstable women and crazy women just like anywhere. The advantage is the cultural background and expectations are largely in line with what is needed for a good marriage when compared to US culture.
Even for women in their 30's, it's expected that her mom and dad have to approve of a marriage, and when you marry her, you marry the whole family, so to speak. (Not for sexual relations, of course.)
The food is good. My wife is an excellent cook, better than your average Indonesian cook, even. There are multiple cuisines there that aren't all that similar necessarily. My top three favorite are Padang, Manado, and Javanese.
Foreigners, especially Caucasians, are seen as rich. They could also attract gold diggers and slutty girls who (for obvious reasons) think they might have a chance with a rich foreigner when a nice local man wouldn't be interested because of the sluttiness. Some foreigners have low expectations when it comes to sexual virtue.
mrman its gonna get mongered and mongered fast because philippines has been mongered too much and thailand is even worse. cambodia is next to thailand so teh groupies also go there for cheaper punts. so that leaves indonesia due to its less repressive government compared to vietnam at the moment and the fact it has over 200 million people and beaches and tons of forests. cambodia is also too backwards, same with laos. Malaysia is too muslim and conservative, indonesia is already conservative enough. So that leaves only indonesia in the area. I think china also may become a mongering destination too due to its sheer size. I can't imagine it not be. Maybe thats why winston is headed to china. lol
Yeah no point in marrying a borderline girl who will age out and look average in a few years. Might as well stay home in my opinion. All these guys talking about love, well love aint gonna make up for an ugly face. I call that charity.
Mrman do they expect you to send money to the parents like in phil? Do women often work abroad or sacrifice their love life to pay for their sisters and brothers or parents expenses? Do the poor girls endlessly leech off foreigners?
Hows the scenery in indonesia? Id like to visit the rain forests and stuff. It just seems like an interesting country. Is the nature worth seeing or can it be found elsewhere?
About Indonesian and Malaysian Chinese?
It's funny. My wife and I have talked about what each of us would do if the other died. I told her I'd probably remarry. I might go to Indonesia and find another wife there. I wouldn't want one whose remotely feminist, and culturally I like having a wife from there. I'm also about 2 points better looking or more desirable on a scale of 1 to 10 in Indonesia and I could probably find a prettier younger woman. Also, more women are virgins. I'd want a virgin or a widow who hadn't had sex with anyone but her husband (preferably a faithful one who didn't give her some disease.)
My wife told me if that happened to choose a good step mother for our children. She didn't want me to marry a Chinese woman, though, because she said they are 'cerewet.' That means loud, complaining, bossy, or something like that. Sometimes they use the word for babies fussing sometimes.
Maybe some Chinese women are like that over there. I think some Indonesian Chinese women would make good wives, and some of them are better looking, IMO, than the overage Indonesian.
I don't know that much about Chinese from Malaysia. I know one couple. She seems like a good wife and mother type. Their accent is similar to a Singapore accent, so if you can stand to be married to a woman with that kind of accent, go for it. I'm not thinking of the kind of British Singapore accent, more the Chinese one. And they also have this really stressed schwa sound like of like the /^/ sound in 'but' but a little different. I find it a little rough on the ears at times, but not too bad. I think more Chinese speak Chinese. Some speak Chinese and English and can barely get on in Malaysian. I don't think I've ever met a Chinese Indonesian who raised there who wasn't fluent in Indonesian. It's hard to find one in Jakarta who speaks Chinese.
If I were single and had to choose between wife hunting among the Chinese in China versus Malaysia, I might choose Malaysia, partly because I am more familiar with the culture and trust it more to produce marriage-friendly wives than mainland Chinese culture, which I know less about, but which I suspect may have been contaminated by Communist thought.
There is a stereotype of Indonesian Chinese as being rich, mainly because a lot of them are. There is a kind of Chinese merchant class. The government wouldn't let them own farmland like local 'pribumi' people. Chinese in Medan seem more into being Chinese, speaking their Hokkian or Ke dialects or whatever. I road in an elevator in an office building in Medan once and two Chinese people started speaking Chinese to each other. Most Chinese around there don't seem to know Mandarin, though some of the educated ones do. The government suppressed the Chinese language and celebrations for a long time and pressured Chinese to take local names as part of an anti-Communist agenda. Some have studied Mandarin.
My concern for someone marrying a Chinese girl from the merchant class is that she may have grow up with a made picking up her socks off the floor and doing the laundry. My wife is from a poorer family. She watched the family shop in middle school, washed the clothing for uncles when she went to stay in the big city, and worked hard her whole life. I wouldn't want to be married to the pampered princess type. Some of them learn to keep a good home. I have a friend whose wife is Indonesian Chinese. They both have good jobs, and she's busy working. Their house was dirty. They had lots of girls. The girls weren't cleaning and keeping the place neat. Batak are into training the girls to keep the house clean. You'd probably find the same with poor or middle class Javanese and other groups.
Lots of Chinese are Christians. Traditionally, Batak, Ambones, and Manado are some people-groups where many of the people profess Christianity. There are also some predominantly Christian Papua tribes who look like Australian Aboriginese and various other peoples. Javanese are mostly Muslim but there are lots and lots of Javanese Christians.
Sunda is like 99% or more Muslim. Aceh, Malayu, Minang, and Madura people traditionally tend to be Muslim as well. Ethnic Balinese tend to be Hindu, probably 99% or so. Lombok is predominantly Muslim. Kalimantan (Borneo) has communities that have migrated there from other peoplegroups who can be Muslim or Christian. There are Dayak Christians, animists, and Hindu-Kaharingan. Legally, you can't marry a Muslim in Indonesia if you aren't one. If a Muslim girl does marry you, it's possible some Islamic scholar or family member may encourage her to leave you. I've heard of that when the husband left Islam. But it seems to be rare overall.
If I've commented on wanting my wife to be a bit more obedient or docile, she's said she's not a Javanese woman. Apparently, they have a reputation for being submissive wives. Javanese tend to be polite and hide their feelings unless they are extremely upset. Batak tend to be more out in the open with their thoughts and feelings.