Join John Adams, world renowned Intl Matchmaker, Monday nights 8:30 EST for Live Webcasts!
And check out Five Reasons why you should attend a FREE AFA Seminar! See locations and dates here.
View Active Topics View Your Posts Latest 100 Topics FAQ Topics Mobile Friendly Theme
Discuss culture, living, traveling, relocating, dating or anything related to the Asian countries - China, The Philippines, Thailand, etc.
Is it bad for a profile, not having much information posted? I think, it depends.
I mean, I read the articles for 'scammers' and it is said about 'hiding', 'not willing to share information' etc.
But, on the other hand, many members here, mentioned that most of times we talk about simple persons indeed, with very simple minds etc. So, maybe a girl just describes herself or what she wants, with only a few words.
It made me tremendous good impression that they do not mention anything about man's job in their profiles.
Maybe it has to do with their belief that all other countries are better in prosperity than theirs, but in any case, this is one additional factor in favor of a western man, who does not have to matter about 'status' and 'good job' and 'high salaries'. Just a job, some money to be able to live simple, and love with asian girl! This is happiness!
Can you evaluate and tell me, if a girl's profile is closed and after a few days appears once again with new profile and photo, what is this sign?
I mean, it could be happen to everyone, but if it happens repeatedly may be something (bad?) happen.
Administrators of DIA told me that some girls do not want to appear that they are for many years on the site, so they used to close and re-open profiles. This is why DIA deleted the 'date' information of profiles.
But this may be not an explanation now that 'date' has gone, and still some girls has (voluntarily or involuntarily) their profiles closed and reopened.
How do you explain, that even that I declare that 'want kids: no', they contact me and interested in me, girls who declare 'want kids: yes' ?
If we ever had a relationship with such girl, even the best one, I would not retreat in any case.
But besides this short declaration, I do not want to declare it with an additional phrase in my profile, this personal preference.
So, how do you explain it?
I could say plenty, but why should I when I have written about it ad nauseum:
Dave's online dating tips:
http://www.marriedafilipina.com/2014/06 ... ng-tips-1/
Version #2 was told tongue in cheek (in other words do the opposite):
http://www.marriedafilipina.com/2015/08 ... ng-tips-2/
And finally from the other side, here's my wife talking about how she approached online dating:
I have sent messages to some girls, that were online a month ago, and back again online yesterday. Big time gap indeed.
If I want to speed up things I should omit these profiles for sure.
But, why should I consider them useless, even if they get online rarely?
If I am not pressed by time, should I keep contacting them too?
Am I missing something about these profiles? What are your thoughts about it?
Based on many of your questions I would say you are sincere but perhaps are overthinking this thing. There is not absolute answer for every situation online. Your best bet for online dating is to have fun, talk to lots of women, attempt to learn as much as you can about the women and the culture, and then of course - visit the Philippines.
While asking very specific questions such as "what does it mean when a girl does/says x..." can be valuable, I would recommend making Filipina friends and asking the women. One of the strategies I used was that I made good friends with several Filipinas with whom there was no romantic connection. They would ask me what American men meant by their words and actions and I asked the same about Filipinas. In fact I had a couple of them FB friend my wife when we were early in the relationship and give me their view of her.
If you are dead set against having kids, then tell the girls (sounds like you are) and proceed from there. I have perhaps 100 Fil-Am couples I am friends with in my city and many do not have kids - so there are no absolutes.
I do feel that this is often due to age factors... a lot of men who marry Filipina women tend to be older men, divorced men such as yourself. Many of them have children from earlier marriages, are close to retirement and do not want to go through that experience and responsibility again. It's probably fairly rare for a man of your age to still want to have a family, though it happens fairly often and isn't unheard of.
When you have a young Filipina woman, from a fairly conservative Catholic background (which is 90% of them if not more!), chances are she will want to have children sooner or later. Only very few don't, and I feel like the ones that don't have them with their (older, Western) husbands only do so because they make a concession to their husband, who is against the idea. The vast majority of Filipina women seem to enjoy the though of having "white, tall-nosed babies". When they think of a white husband, they think of the cute and pretty Mestiza offspring that comes with it. It's part of the charm. Part of the deal. You marry a guy from another culture, a guy many women have trouble communicating with, who's often older, and some of whom are plain weird and looking for a glorified nurse... and the pay off is financial stability and little white kiddos. Deny them this and I think, based on my experiences, it'll be a dealbreaker for a lot of potential girlfriends.
I totally agree and am working on producing one of those pasty white, long nosed kids. But since Mentor is against it I wanted to assure him that not all Filipinas are the same, nor women from any culture. So if he is dead set against it, there will be some women who will accept that, though I agree that most Filipinas will want kids.
Of course the other strategy is to marry a woman who already has kids, but that has its own positives and negatives.
Bottom line is that there potentially is a Filipina wife for nearly every man - if he doesn't overthink it and gets on a plane.
Wasn't there a story on here recently about the older guy who found a cute young filipina who couldn't have children? She was worried it would be a deal breaker and it turned out to be perfect for both of them, so something like that.
When I was young, in America, before I really knew what the Philippines or a filipina was, I had a filipina girlfriend. She was older than me, since I was like early 20's, and she couldn't have children. That had its benefits at the time.
“b***y is so strong that there are dudes willing to blow themselves up for the highly unlikely possibility of b***y in another dimension." -- Joe Rogan
From my little experience, I found it very helpful to give 'time' to this try to filipina girls.
I watch some profile over the last months, profiles I liked.
Some of them after some time, change their description declaring 'financial' topics!
Other ones changed the 'having kids: no' to 'yes'!
Other ones disappear after some days of existence!
Other ones change their photo to a hotter one, giving me a clue of their intentions!
I guess it would be rather easy to involve with some of them, only to find out later bad aspects about them.
It could happen anytime, but why just not giving some time, to deal with a more tidy situation?
I believe that everything need its time. DIA is not exception.