Join John Adams, world renowned Intl Matchmaker, Monday nights 8:30 EST for Live Webcasts!
And check out Five Reasons why you should attend a FREE AFA Seminar! See locations and dates here.
View Active Topics View Your Posts Latest 100 Topics FAQ Topics Mobile Friendly Theme
Discuss culture, living, traveling, relocating, dating or anything related to the Asian countries - China, The Philippines, Thailand, etc.
I'm playing femme advocate here. I find it odd that women would be okay with dropping everything and leaving their homes. I've met plenty of Filipinas that are like, "Nah, I'm kickin' it in my country" and would never leave it. If they are as big on family values as you all say they are, I'd be suspect. Not MGTOW-Sandman level, but I-don't-think-with-my-dick level. I guess one compromise would be to 'sponsor' a lover. You support her lifestyle in the west, but you don't bring the state into it and don't put her name on anything. That's similar to what a friend of mine does with roommates; their names never go on the lease. I know in America the states' laws are different, but it covers his arse in the case of some idiot thinking he's king of the parking lot and challenging my friend when he's just trying to be chill. I guess in AZ you can get served at any time. If you were on the lease, you are a 'legal tenant' and all that jazz.
Point? Stop and think when you make serious life choices. I don't blame the guy for wanting a wife or messing with this girl. He's young and he's at his sexual prime. No amount of "men are rapists" campaigns will change biology. There is a reason the older cats call the 20s-30s the "young dumb n' full of cum" stage. Sometimes I fall into that category, but I always retain enough big head thinking to avoid a pitfall.
Self-improvement addict. Always striving for perfection.
I'd take stories where a jilted spouse goes whining to the press with a pinch of salt. There's always two sides to a story and for all we know this guy could have been cheating on her or treating her like dirt
The happier abroad thing works better if you can earn a decent living. If he had a degree from an English speaking country, they could have moved to another Asian country where he could have taught English. That's an easy way to get a job if you have a degree, or was when I was doing it.
In the comments to the British article at least one person asks if she was a bar girl. Based on the early time line. At the very least her getting knocked up so soon after they met and before marriage indicates at least short sighted thoughts or perhaps entrapment.
You can sponsor someone and bring them to the west, but if you are living together, in a few years you will be considered married at least in Canada and I assume the US. If you want to bring a girl to your country without being married, will she even be able to get a visa? Maybe. Also if you are setting her up in her own place and not living together, you basically have purchased an exclusive contract with a glorified bar girl. Once set up like that she will move on to a better deal. No decent girl will be turned into a mistress/sugarbaby.
If he was a that bad of a guy, she would have told her side to the press. Man bad is not a narrative that the press stay away from. I'd say the opposite. The more fail in the relationship the better the story. They say she wants to go back to him. If she told them he smacked her around and or cheated on her she would have a hefty legal settlement on her hands.
There is a world of difference between some random person bitching to other random people and the press reporting something. Granted there are exceptions where the press just doesn't do it's job. However in this case it seems they spoke to all parties.
My wife just provided me with a little more information on what happened to my friend. As it turns out, he has been less then truthful with me and neglected to tell me some important details of what took place at that unfateful moment of departure...
So he did indeed leave by himself, but this was not the original plan. The original plan was that my buddy would be accompanied by his wife to the airport in Manila. They waited together in their room until they'd go to the bus. He had packed his bags and she said she wanted to take a quick powernap. He would check his bags in the meantime, he said. But as she fell asleep, he snuck out of the room alone and left her without saying a proper goodbye. This is when he was ambushed, roughed up and relieved of all his belongings. He then came back with his tail behind his legs.
Now his wife, who both Mrs. Zeitola and I happen to have on Facebook, just made a status update in which she complained about "unfaithful people" and how cheating destroys marriages. She mentioned no names but we all know who this is about. It makes me wonder, if perhaps there was some truth to her accusations that he cheated? For all her own flaws, I cannot condone a man cheating on his wife when she herself by all accounts has been nothing but faithful.
If true, this puts the whole situation in a different perspective. As he won't be leaving any time soon and we're still on friendly terms, I plan on getting him drunk some day and hopefully get the whole story out of him. I'm pretty curious now, lol. If he did actually cheat on her, that would be the stupidest thing a man can do when he put all of his savings in a business he set up with his wife. Sharing all assets, and having them written in her name, it puts him completely at her mercy. Now the cheating, from what I gather, may have taken place months ago and if true, this would explain some of her hostile behavior.
Going abroad may make you feel King of the Castle, but the King would be wise to remember the Queen still holds the Castle's keys.
Sounds like there was an escalating spiral. Financial problems creates problems at home, social isolation messes with his mind. He cheats, she finds out and things get even worse. Or maybe he just started it by being a cheating putz.
I have a particular revulsion for those who cheat. I'd be so happy to find a decent girl. Also cheating is a pretty brutal thing to do to somebody, it is up there with punching someone in the face and spitting on them in terms of disrespect.
This is going to sound harsh but here we go. First off I don't know what this man is expecting out of his relationship. From what I'm reading he seems to lack a lot of ambition such as working at McDonalds at 25. Just because someone goes abroad doesn't mean they'll 100% succeed. HappierAbroad isn't a magic bullet solution unlike what some people believe. Yes you will find more respectful and tradition women abroad but it is a SUPPLEMENT to your life. More important however, a man who is having severe issues with his character is still going to struggle one way or another. What he should've done is not rushed his proposal and saved a lot more money before travelling but assuming he's an idiot and impulsive he suffered the consequences. I don't know this man's circumstances but he was very desperate to have made such a drastic move. Actions like these should've been planned far ahead.