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Discuss culture, living, traveling, relocating, dating or anything related to the Asian countries - China, The Philippines, Thailand, etc.
I see alot of topics here about Chinese/Taiwan/Filipino women but interestingly not many about Korean women. I'm here to give you my experience on this, if any of you are interested in Korean women at all, I have lived in Seoul for 2 years, clubbed, partied, online dating, etc a lot. Here's my impressions:
HOW TO MEET A KOREAN GIRL:
-I am Chinese Canadian, so dating in Korea is a little bit more difficult for me than for white people. As with any other Asian country, White people have the most advantage due to Hollywood/America etc all that stuff that Asian women like. Like other Asian women, Korean girls think that every guy in America looks like Chris Evans and has alot of money. So if you are white, then definitely you have the most advantage.
-That said, out of all Asian girls, Korean girls are also the hardest to get for a foreigner. Why is this? Because its a small country. Koreans have a culture where they support each other, very family oriented etc which means that a number of girls strictly only date with Korean guys. This is not a majority of girls though, as a sizeable amount are open to dating with foreigners.
-The BEST way to date a Korean girl is to get introduced. The culture here emphasizes blind dating. So if you know a Korean friend, he/she can introduce you, thats the best way. Otherwise you will have to use online meetup websites, or language exchange sites, or applications like HelloTalk or MEEP to get to know a girl. This is more difficult to get to know them because Korean girls are super flaky. Out of the language sites and apps I used, only about 30-40% responded to me, and out of that response rate, maybe a third was willing to meet up while the other girls were Kakao chats only.
-Speaking of Kakao, that is the WeChat of Korea, the QQ of Korea, if you will. Absolutely if you want to contact a girl, be sure to download the KakaoTalk application and sign up, since every Korean girl uses that app to communicate.
-One night stand is fairly common especially in the areas of Seoul known for good nightlife like Hongdae or Itaewon. If you are white especially, just go to any club, be sure to have a wingman, and try talking up some girls and knowing a bit of Korean doesn't hurt either. You should always be the one to talk though, Korean girls aren't known for being loud or very talkative.
-Most young Korean girls can speak English alright, but not fluently. You should learn some basic Korean if you want to communicate with a girl effectively, but there are lots of girls in Hongdae/Itaewon who know English pretty well too, so if you go to those areas you might be ok.
-Do NOT make sexual jokes with a Korean girl or ask her over to your place unless you know them very well or if its a sleazy type of girl you met at a club. Most Korean girls will not go to a guys place the first time you meet them. They want to take time to get to know you first before they can come over.
-Lots of Korean girls go to church, how devoted they are depends on the girl, but church is always a good way to meet people, if your Korean is good enough to understand what they are saying.
-If you are brave enough, approaching a girl in a public area to ask for her number is actually done by many guys and is called "hunting". Depends on the time and place, but it may work out, especially if you are white.
HOW TO DATE A KOREAN GIRL:
-A relationship with a Korean girl is a give a lot - get a lot type of relationship. You have to text/call her a lot, so Korean girls are definitely high maintenance. I'd say like 50-60 texts a day especially if the girl is young. What you get in return is a girl who really does care about you and very sweet and loving, in my opinion. They do little things for you like help you put on your coat, buy gifts for you, do cute things with you etc they can be very sweet if you put in the time for them.
-Usually on a date, the guy is expected to pay for the main meal, and the girl usually pays for coffee/tea later. One side doesn't pay for everything.
-You are expected to remember the major couple days in Korea, and there is a lot, in addition to bday/anniversary there is valentines day (2/14) where the girl gets the guy a gift and white day (3/14) where the guy gets the girl a gift.
-Korean girls can be very jealous, and some girls might even ask you not to meet any of your female friends. This is normal in Korea, where relationships tend to be very exclusive, and time for meeting other people are restricted if you are in a relationship. This is in accordance with the give a lot / get a lot thing.
-Don't be messy. Make sure if you invite a Korean girl over to your place, everything is super clean and tidy. That's what they expect.
-They prefer the man to make the decisions for them. So when you set up a date, be sure to decide on the places to go, schedule, etc they will be expecting you to. They are very feminine and so they prefer guys to take the initiative.
WHY A KOREAN GIRL OVER OTHER ASIAN GIRLS:
-Korean girls are known as amongst the most beautiful women in the world, at least superficially, and they are probably the most self-conscious insecure women in Asia. Almost every girl wears makeup all the time, and dresses up like its clubbing attire all the time. Short skirts, high heels, transparent stockings (yes even in winter) are pretty normal wear for Korean women. You will probably find them the most feminine out of all Asian women. They all like to have pale skin, red lips and perfect straight white teeth (unlike Japanese girls).
-Yes alot of girls get plastic surgery but to be fair, 80% of the time, this is for getting double eyelids to make their eyes look bigger. This is why you will see more Korean girls with bigger eyes than Korean guys. If you have a problem with girls wearing a lot of makeup or having surgery on her face, then Korean girls are probably not for you (You should probably try Chinese girls instead).
-As I said, if you put time into the relationship, they can be very very sweet and loving women, and very devoted. I can't compare with other Asian girls much, but definitely they put alot of effort into the relationship.
-No expectation for the guy to cook, since most Korean men can't. But its always a plus if you can!
-Great fashion sense, and you'll also notice 90% of Korean girls don't wear glasses, preferring contacts or lasik surgery instead.
-Korean women shave every part of their body except the p***y, but some do if you ask them to.
-Most Korean girls are very polite and nice to people, but also very shy at first glance. You have to get them to open up.
-Korean girls can be very very superficial and shallow sometimes. They care alot about fashion, style, appearance, hygiene. They don't like facial hair. So go for a clean cut appearance, tie and suit, blazer, collar shirt, khakis etc are all good. No baggy stuff, tattoos, beards, bling etc they hate that.
-Guys who are tall and fit and muscular definitely have an advantage over other guys.
-Again, the extreme jealousy part... Korean girls can get pretty crazy if they find you with another girl talking or texting. Be wary of these things.
-Yes some girls are gold diggers, but this can be said for any girl in the world, so take caution with that.
-The hottest girls (10s) don't speak English at all. Which makes them pretty much Korean men material only. You can try but... unless you are a celebrity it will be very difficult.
All in all, Korean women IMO are the hottest girls in Asia, surgery or not. Their mind is in between Chinese women and Japanese women, which means they aren't totally blunt but not totally hiding their emotions either. If you like a girl who cares about her appearance, and are willing to put in the time and effort you will be rewarded, so check out South Korea if you have the chance. Hope this post helps you guys.
Last edited by gofishus on March 29th, 2016, 1:00 am, edited 2 times in total.
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I dated one Korean girl when I was in Korea in the 1990s. Lots of Koreans are light skinned, but there are some darker ones if you are into that.
If you've heard of 'Kangnam Style', Kangnam is a neighborhood in Seoul. There is a Kangnam stop. I remember when I was there that the places had so many young people, about half of them women. It seemed like the standard girl who walked by was a 7, which is pretty good. I think I saw one really fat person in Korea. People do chunk up slightly when they get middle aged, but not a lot. Chunky young people are rare, or were when I was there. Koreans eat a lot of fresh (hot, spicy, and sometimes pickled) vegetables all the time with rice.
I had a white friend who was married to a Korean girl in her mid 20's when I was there. They were newly weds, and he was always telling me about their sex life. He said, she told him, "If you want me in the middle of the night, just wake me up and tell me." They had sex every night and she liked him to chase her around and tackle her. When I heard that, I thought, maybe I ought to get me a Korean wife. But I found the culture kind of stilted and homogeneous. They all think and talk one way and if you aren't one of them, you don't get it. They aren't flexible in their thinking for the most part. That's how it felt to me. So I was thinking I didn't want to be tied to Korea. Chances are, most Korean women don't crave sex every night like his wife did. Those women are probably as rare in any culture you go to.
I didn't enjoy hearing that stuff because it was TMI. I knew his wife, too, and didn't want to think of their sex life when I saw her.
Some students set me up with a fellow student, a very, very pretty girl in my class, the class I was teaching. She was a different religion and one of my students. I told her I didn't think dating students was a good idea. They set me up on a surprise 'meeting' or blind date. Apparently, she liked me though.
The friend who kept telling me about his wife's sex life said his wife had a friend who were interested in dating westerners. He showed me a picture. Didn't float my boat at all and I said no thank you. They invited me to go to an amusement park one weekend with a bunch of his in-laws, including a little kid. Two of his wife's friends tagged along, the one I saw a picture of who I did not find attractive, and another friend who was drop dead gorgeous. I said to my buddy, especially when they were getting ready to go on the kiddie rides, how about if I let you guys go on the kiddie rides and I hang out with your wife's friends. He said that was the girl you turned down for a 'meeting' so you blew your chance. I think I told him he should have showed me the other girls picture. I didn't speak a lick of Korean, so I just went to the kiddie ride.
I did just ask a girl out without going through someone for a 'meeting' there and went on a date or two. I didn't really pursue it. I was getting ready to leave and decided I didn't want to be tied down. She sent me one letter later with her picture in it.
I like Korean food. My wife is Indonesian, but she likes Korean food and has learned to cook a lot of it, along with Indonesian food, Thai food, and lots of western food. Things turned out pretty good for me marrying an Indonesian. I still get to eat Korean food, and I don't have to deal with that rigid culture. Indonesians are a lot more laid back. I can see though how the shy demure Korean girl personality would appeal to a lot of guys. I agree that they are feminine.
Indeed, they are not as open minded as say a Chinese or Filipino girl. They are more rigid in their thinking and most Koreans act/dress the same way. That said, I didn't find it very difficult to adapt as I like how Koreans do things anyways. But I can understand it doesnt float everyones boat.
Generally said, South Korea is not a good place for foreign men to date local girls.
It is more the opposite, South Korea is the No. 1 in Asia where local men are looking for foreign (Asian, often from China, Vietnam, Philippines etc.) wives.
Unfortunately, South Korea is now a society which is strongly US-influenced, feminism, Christianity....
Better to try Japan, the area is larger, more population, better income, less US-feminism, only few people are into Christian moral values, divorce is not a business for lawyers.
I haven't seen many feminists in Korea... Korea is still a male dominated society. The #1 reason I heard Korean guys don't like Korean girls is the girls are too high maintenance and not independent enough like other Asian girls. Keep that in mind..
When I was there in the 1990's, a Korean marrying a foreigner was a big deal. I remember it was discussed on a talk show, 'international marriage', they called it. There are a lot of soldiers in Korea, and my friend married to a Korean said that some men would assume his wife had been a prostitute since some soldiers had married prostitutes or there were rumors about it. When they heard he was an English teacher, some of them said, "Oh, she must really have wanted to learn English." It's a joke, but its as if wanting to learn English is the only reason to marry a foreigner.
A lot of Koreans marry Vietnamese and Filippinas because most Korean women don't want to marry poor farmers and live in the country. So they find women for whom this is a step up. In the 1990's, South Korean farmers were importing ethnic Koreans in China. I guess the Chinese have gotten richer and the market has dried up over there. So they import other nationalities. It must be a lot more multiracial than it was before, but a lot of this may be in the country-side. It's interesting that it will change their gene pool. That's probably good for them to diversify the genes.
In 'K-dramas' there are households where the man is in charge and households where the woman is in charge. I think that's probably true of reality. The women speak softly and demurely in public, but you'd have to figure out if she's going to be bossy after marriage, set the tone early in marriage that you are in charge, and manage her. It's just like any marriage. You could have that situation with an Indonesian or Filippina if you don't manage the relationship right. Down the line, it's harder to flip things around though it can be done somewhat. One thing to look for is if her mom bosses her dad around.
I'd recommend staying away from a pouty princess type. A lot of Korean girls give off the 'innocent' vibe. Someone recently posted some link to an article that said that a huge percentage of Korean girls had been in the sex industry. Maybe they include tea rooms where women show men some attention without sleeping with them, too. I don't know. That's another thing to consider. I suspect there are some unspoiled Koreans. The last I heard, they segregate boys and girls into different school at age 7 and most of them don't mix much until college. Then, their older classmates set them up on 'meetings' to try to find a boyfriend or girlfriend. They can keep up the meetings until they find a good match. So you if date on who is about 18 or 19 in college, you might be the first boyfriend.
Some of them will marry their college boyfriend or girlfriend. Others don't. They may find matches through relatives or professional matchmakers. A Korean friend of mine kept getting calls from matchmakers when she finished college over there. Some of them get matched up through mothers and aunts who carry their pictures around with them. They strike up conversations with other aunts at the bus stop who have pictures of their nephews or nieces. Or they meet through their parents social network, the boss's son, or whatever.
When they get to the point that a parent or matchmaker is setting them up, it can be very marriage oriented. They meet for coffee or dinner. The parents ask, "Did you like him?" If both parties like each other, it can start moving toward marriage fast. Or so I hear. My info is more than a decade old, though. This happens in K-dramas, too. And in Korean dramas, the women on these set-up 'meetings' can be drop dead gorgeous. But I suspect a lot of them get snatched up early on in college.
In business yes, but for sure not regarding family affairs.
We do not have such restrictions in Japan, if you are a Japanese man and want a foreign wife, you can bring her easily into Japan, no language test etc. is required for a spouse visa.
Also nightlife is very open in Japan compared to South Korea, which totally outlawed prostitution and removed various entertainment areas in Seoul and elsewhere.
South Korea was great a few decades ago for men - for Korean men as well as for foreigners, but not anymore.
Even Koreans in Japan will tell you that...
And if somebody is showing up in front of my door in Tokyo offering me 'a new life after my death' and is ready to save me from hell, you can be assured it's a Korean - either a Jehovah, or a Mormon, etc. I have never seen a Japanese approaching me and trying to proselytize me with a Bible or similar Holy Book.
http://blogs.wsj.com/korearealtime/2014 ... oreigners/
http://qz.com/177329/south-korea-is-cra ... g-reasons/
Another article about divorce, dating etc. in South Korea.
Last edited by Yohan on March 29th, 2016, 5:18 pm, edited 2 times in total.
Matchmakers aren't used that much anymore, the old generation relied on it alot, the new generation prefer to date around a lot more. You are right Korean students rarely date in high school, mostly because they don't have time. I know lots of Korean girls who were mid 20s and never had sex. But they do date around a lot. You'll find couples are the norm in Korea, and being single is the exception. Once they break up, maybe a few weeks later they will be in another relationship. Its easy come, easy go. For young people at least. Older women are more serious, so I generally prefer late 20s because they are more mature.
Its true Korea is cracking down on prostitution, but it still exists. Nightclubs, Hostess bars, Kiss rooms, Massage places (basically sex places), and officestels used for prostitution is fairly common around the gangnam area. I have heard these places are even frequented by policemen and of course the tired business executive looking for some action. Nightlife is definitely around in Korea if you look in the right places...Yes its true foreigners have a hard time marrying Koreans, but hey Korea is known as the most racist nation in Asia for a reason. Everything online is protected by a residential number that you have to have, which restricts access by foreigners.
I live in a Korean neighborhood in Vietnam and have made some observations, but i don't know how much they can be generalized.
It's easy to distinguish Koreans as they're much taller and have bigger skulls, very interesting. And the speech pattern is pretty easy to spot.
Korean girls are not all necessarily the k-pop dolls one would wish, and generally their eyes are a bit too high on their face for my taste, and a larger percentage are a bit chubby, although they're not land whales by any means.
BUT the attractive ones are REALLY attractive, like porcelain dolls, their skin is actually paler/pinker than white women's lol, and in general they have this Ostrich figure with strong hips and football-busting legs, really delicious!!
However they all seem a lot more aloof and superficial, and more into their phones. They don't seem as friendly and naturally curious as their Viet counterparts, less likely to return eye contact. But then again my Korean is nill and haven't really tried talking o them.
Another thing is when it comes to style they either wear mid-butt oversized and dorky t-shirts, or they are really fashion conscious, kind of in extremes.
There are some parallels between K girls and western women it seems. The neighborhood I am in is a bit of a Chumpzone™, plenty of girl-less korean dudes; And although it doesn't really concern me, as I'm seeing viet girls, it makes me wonder if it would be worth it going to Korea. I'll probably learn a few phrases and try here, see what happens.
Another thing, zboy, why does the speech pattern extend so much the last vowel at the end of every phrase, is that a new development? like "ooooh ooh ooohh" and "eehheh eeeeeeh" what's up with that?
It kind of pleases me and annoys me at the same time, but maybe I'm just interpreting that as a snobby/uneducated pattern on some of them, but i could be wrong.
1)Too much of one thing defeats the purpose.
2)Everybody is full of it. What's your hypocrisy?
They prefer to cover their top and expose their legs instead. You wont find Korean girls showing their breasts very often, but out of all girls, I think they like to show their legs the most. It can be -10 degrees outside and they will still wear short skirts lol (in fact I went out for a date with my gf a few days ago and she wasn't even wearing any stockings with her skirt and it was like 5 degrees out and I was shivering wearing my jacket lol I have no idea how they do it..)
There are polite endings in Korean. -eyo is some kind of polite ending, as in 'anyong haseyo', their 'hello' greeting. There is also a 'shipshiyo' (sp?) greeting that they use with older people I think. Girls speaking to men may use more polite endings so you may pick up on women using more of these endings.
They always ask each other how old they are, maybe so they know what kind of grammar to use when they are talking.
I don't speak Korean, so plenty of people know about this stuff better than I do. I knew a little survival Korean. I was kind of upset at myself for not learning the language any more than I did when I was there, so I really determined to learn Indonesian when I went to Indonesia.
Also, it seems like half the commercials when I was there ended with a female covering her mouth as she laughed, 'heeee heee heee'.
On the leg thing, I was also surprised to see girls in miniskirts in really cold weather back in the 1990's. A friend of mine commented that the pretty woman look was popular, with miniskirts and boots. But did they know what that woman's job was in that movie? She was a prostitute!
A student of mine said if a girl dressed too provocatively on his college campus, a guy might come up to her and say, "omayeyo?', which means 'how much?'
Droid, as Mr Man mentioned before, it is polite endings that you often hear at the end of sentences.
As for Korean girls, uh, you guys can have them. There's a reason why Korean men (and other Asian men) avoid going after them. I even know foreigners who avoid Korean girls at all costs as well. Korean girls are some of the most spoiled, ball-busting, materialistic, narcissistic woman in the world.
Before the K-pop phenomenon and Westernization, Korean woman were known to be some of the best woman in the world. I have noticed the changes from the 80s to now. I can only imagine how much things were different before the 80s. I've also talked to expats and Koreans, who have told me countless stories of how great it was in Korea in the past. Sadly, that time has long ago passed.
Droid, your description of Korean girls is spot on! Personally, I think other girls are better, possibly even Japanese girls.
Btw, In any rich Asian country, i.e. Japan, Korea, Taiwan, Singapore, Hong Kong, etc., the woman there can be just as nightmarish as White American girls. But, you will find great girls in those countries, but not as often as countries that aren't as developed such as Philippines, Vietnam, Mongolia,etc.
All I have to say is buyer beware. ...