Welcome to our new upgraded phpbb 3.2 forum! The upgrade is now complete. See announcement and new features here, or report any problems or issues here. Thanks for your patience.
Join John Adams, world renowned Intl Matchmaker, Monday nights 8:30 EST for Live Webcasts!
And check out Five Reasons why you should attend a FREE AFA Seminar! See locations and dates here.
View Active Topics View Your Posts Latest 100 Topics FAQ Topics Switch to Mobile
Discuss culture, living, traveling, relocating, dating or anything related to the Asian countries - China, The Philippines, Thailand, etc.
Oh yeah, people have different triggers, but part of culture shock is trying to dampen the triggers, things are different here, things that never happen back home happen here.
Most things don't annoy me, I don't care about the spitting, the pollution, the traffic and lack of road management, the pushing and shoving, the slurping - most things I can just brush off - and even with the 'herrrrrrrrrro' I just tell them to 'f**k off' and then move on. I wouldn't stand there and get into a twenty minute row over it. But I remember those first two years were really really hard, but you have to adapt - as you know yourself.
I think with that article, with some people - it takes YEARS. It took that guy four years of being angry but sooner or later - like you said - you live with the Masai long enough, you are going to do a raindance in a loincloth and not feel a twat about it. You nailed it right there actually.
Jesus. You really should shut the f**k up. You aren't that bright are you....don't answer that. You sound like a retard to me. Dont come on and contribute nothing helpful to my thread - part of which is an adjustment and me venting some feelings that I have.
Shut the f**k up. go sit in a corner or something. You jealous, butthurt individual. Always a retard in these postings. If it's not Tapatio...
Misery and happiness are only states of mind.
If you don't want opinions don't vent on a public forum, you're just confirming what I'm saying.
Snap out of it, you make your life miserable all by yourself. Try acupuncture or something while you're over there.
1)Too much of one thing defeats the purpose.
2)Everybody is full of it. What's your hypocrisy?
You're a blue pill p***y if you think shengnu are some kind of prize. No wonder dating in China is easy for you then, if you go for the leftovers.
Doesn't matter what they could pull in a corrupt Western country. In Western countries, hideous and obese women can pull male model looking types. Does that prove obese women are somehow valuable? Get real.
It's not inevitable, and it's usually the result of a slow grinding down of the man, a woman going in for the kill (marriage), and accepting mediocrity and life failure. There are certainly some wonderful exceptions, but a lot end up as lifers because of their choices and a lack of will or options for getting out. So you don't have to end up a lifer where ever you go, but it can be hard to avoid if you stay long enough and don't have something going on beyond your life in that country.
I'm not looking for or expecting a 10 (except for p4p.) I consider wife material to end at at 7s. (Although I don't personally use the number rating scale.) Looks for a man shouldn't matter, and in sane societies they don't. Women in China are gaining more "liberation" and so are getting to be choosier in looks now. No wonder that as a result, there are more leftovers.
I'm far from alone in finding it hard and weird here. You only find it easy because you go for leftovers.
Eric, are you are good looking guy? If you are better than average looking + not Asian, then you are going to get stared at. They were waving? That sounds like a happy moment, not a negative one. If this is true, just think of yourself as a popular stranger. You're going to have people say hello and wave hi to you just because they notice you're a foreigner. That is not necessarily a bad thing. That can be a very good thing. In fact, you might be a miniature celebrity. In other words, they might like you. Don't let it go to your head.
My suggestion is that you either accept it and be polite, or when you notice those signs that annoy you, IGNORE THEM, and remember that you can't control people's actions.
More than likely though, you've misunderstood their motivations for their actions.
And you're a p***y full stop.
Ghost: wah wah wah - the Chinese won't date me, Filipinas are subhuman waaaaaaaaaah
A lot of them certainly are, you think you would be doing some beautiful female doctor a favour because she is 28...
your reality is not one that most people live in... these are the facts, you wouldn't get most shengnu.
Fixed it for you Ghost.
So - you want to compete for women with men who have more money, have more connections, are more in line to be accepted by the girls family, speak the language, better looking, wash regularly - yeah, good luck with that Ghost.
That's not true, Ghost, stop using hyperbole - it ruins whatever argument you have.
It is inevitable because one day you get old and you want to settle - even if it is 13 floors up in a condo in Bangkok, and then you die, yes, running around the world is great in your 20's, 30's and 40's but one day - you get to an age where you start looking for a comfy spot. That will be you one day, you wait and see.
You can't afford them.
Are you a seven yourself? Ermmmmmmmmmmmmprobablynot...
Fixed that for you Ghost - what are you on the scale 1-10?
No, the reason there are more 'leftovers' is because women will not put up with the bullying hierachy of in-laws and husbands who will beat them and cheat on them with KTV whores - a lot of women, women who have shite going on for them, don't want the drama - so they are opting out. Chinese women are a lot more forgiving on a lack of looks (except when it comes to westerners) than probably any nationality of woman on the planet - which is you see what you see when you see couples walking around anytown China.
Have you ever thought about washing, grooming, buying clothes that suit you, exercising, keeping up with your Chinese, losing weight... all those proactive things, and you might become something of a catch - just a thought.
This forum is hopeless - since people can't get over bickering and arguing pointlessly with themselves, I swear I am sick of it.
There is no hope for humanity. ... I feel like, I, either I'm insane, or people have lost touch with themselves and reality. I don't think I am insane. I just read a lot of Bible Old Testament and hold onto a deeper knowledge/wisdom of the world....
so I seem out of place by comparison.
It's weird but, that's what I think is happening. People also, can't handle sadness or a regular emotion, they have to be happy all of the time; people are addicted to the feel-good high, they can't sit with themselves - I am mainly talking about westerners I see. It's frustrating and exhausting, being misunderstood and feeling alone.....Its strange that he who has wisdom, should be so out of place in comparison with a modern world who's lost it totally almost.
I feel like people have lost a deeper layer of themselves.
Misery and happiness are only states of mind.
Fixed that for you.
Don't confuse observations with whining, you twat.
That's just as well because I don't want them either. A woman is not valuable for her schooling or "career." A woman is valuable for her femininity, youth, and fertility. Or perhaps in good feminist fashion, you're butthurt because you can't undo millions of years of male evolution.
I don't compete. That's for losers like you that don't know what they are "competing" for is leftover women that Chinese men don't want. There isn't much competition in China given that 1. the vast majority of Chinese girls would never go with a laowai man, and 2. most Chinese girls will get a boyfriend due to their parents' matchmaking. You may think you're "competing" but all you're really doing is increasing your pool of leftovers the local men don't want. Whoop-dee-fucking-doo.
It's not hyperbole. I've seen it many times.
Wanting to settle is not the same as getting stuck as a lifer. Anyway, way ahead of you, Jack. I'm already looking for a place and a way to settle down and start putting down some roots.
Sure I can, just have to budget. I could do it monthly. I don't find that worth it though, except perhaps on rare occasions. Pros are really good since it's their job they want repeats, but it's ultimately just really good empty pleasure.
I don't use it personally. Are you retarded? Sorry, I should have asked: how retarded are you?
In terms of numbers, f**k that, don't know. I'm an ugly f***er and make no bones about it.
No, there are leftovers because women are picky and stupid, or are ugly or undesirable for some other reason. Lots of women do put up with the "bullying hierarchy," even those who are desirable. Most shengnu are not terribly attractive, especially not given how many attractive girls local men could choose from, or get their parents to introduce them to. You sound like a bitch.
Have you ever thought about not being such a moronic twat?
1: The staring thing. You keep bring it up. People have explained it to you. If you lived in an outport 20 years ago in Newfoundland and saw some Chinese or black dude walking around you would look. You might not be as obvious about it, cultural filters and all but you would look. You are a curiosity. That doesn't mean they have any ill will towards you. If you knew the language better you could probably use that novelty factor to your advantage.
2: Related to 1. You have anger issues. I doubt anywhere you go will make you happy. I don't mean to be a dick or to put you down when I say this but I remember posting a story about the guard who asks visitors what their home town is like before describing his city because he figures they will see his people the same as their own. You seem prone to outbursts even when people are trying to help you. You seem to have carried all of your issues from the US to China.
3: China might not be the place for you. Based on complaints you made about the US I figured it wouldn't work out well. I am shocked that the complaints IIRC started almost as soon as you landed. Most people get some sort of honeymoon phase.
4: I've known 2 Chinese girls well. One fresh off the boat HK about 25 years ago and one PRC in Canada but still fully Chinese in attitude.
Both of them are not materialistic at all. The HK girl [and their rep is as bad if not worse as Shanghai what’s the term Green Tea Bitches?] always dressed simply and still does, would have been quite happy with my ass even though I am not a go getter if only I had asked her out. The other, she is nearly broke from legal issues, refuses strongly almost every offer I make to pay, and when she caves I have to make a strong argument and just force the issue, doesn't like gifts, doesn't want me to do anything for her birthday when I suggested I spoil her.
Now I am not going to say you are wrong and I am right. Unlike some people here I understand that people run in different circles and in my case the sample size is pretty low. Also your complaints seem pretty common among those in China.
My point is that in any population there are exceptions. One person with years in the Phillippines believes that 3% of them are not retarded greedy little scam artists. I'd guess the ration of decent to horrible in China is better than that.
You just need a way to meet lots of girls and filter the good from the bad quickly. How to do that. I haven't the foggiest, but then I am not in the position to have to figure it out. Granted without language skills, it is not easy. One can say that for anywhere really.
I have to admit, someone who claims to only see one hottie in the UK a week calling someone else out on hyperbole is pretty f***ing funny.
People often see only what they want to see. Ditto for those who say they *only* see land whales in the US. I guess when I go south of the border they let all the hotties out of their cells I've also never been shot at by a police killing gangsta with an AK-47 either.
Plenty of hotties around at least among the 15 to 30 set. Plenty of mehs running around Chinatown.
You are f***ing a working Filipina? So f***ing what?
It's like bragging about owning a radio and TV in your house. Who couldn't go to the Philippines tomorrow and be sexually active a week
after stepping off the plane? Hardly a big deal (though I image it is to you).
You must be the biggest, moaning, whining p***y here.
Have you thought what makes YOU valuable? I remember your laughable thread about taking on shengnu's as doing something of a favour, you have NOTHING to offer them at all, you can't speak their language, have no interest in their culture, you are already dating someone, you need a haircut, you are a slob of a man - and you wonder you have to get a plane to the Philippines when you are already in China, in a country with 850 million women.
It is complete and utter hyperbole - obese women MIGHT get normal looking guys of normal weight and looks but they DON'T get male models. I have never seen that in my life - but I am sure an exception or two exists.
You'll end up as a life far before I will - why? There's going to be a BIG Filipino family to support - you'll be paying out for all their little business schemes, schooling etc etc etc.
Ghost: Oh no, I won't do that blahblahblah
And then your missus will THROW BACK IN YOUR FACE the time you stopped her going to the states and how she could have been an millionairess if she hadn't listened to you - you are the biggest chump here - everyone can see it coming but you can't.
Ghost: 'Waaaaaaaaaaaaah - we had a pregnancy scare waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah - the matrix is going to trap me waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah'
Well stop having unprotected sex with her you f***ing idiot.
They wouldn't f**k you anyway, and the 10's who work in industry are not going to f**k some smelly foreigner - no, they are not. It's you living in a little dreamworld.
You use it ALL THE TIME - hence my post.
Ghost: 'I don't use the rating system but only go for sevens in a wife'
If I went through your posting history, I could find a 150 posts with you rating someone or something. You went and rated your wife prospects in that very posts, you cretin.
Well, MIGHT this be a factor on why you are unsuccessful in China, and others might not be. I am just saying, your experiences aren't universal.
There you go - you have loads in common with them already.
Whereas you ARE a bitch. I know this, and I know why you are failing left right and centre.
It is no point reflecting your inner self and failures onto me, I am not the one with a problem in a country with 850 million women.
None of it is your fault, won't learn Chinese, won't wash, won't go out and buy decent clothes and stop being a scruff. What do you want anyone to do about it?
You have never been to the UK, what you think again is... immaterial.
One hottie a week, and that's me being generous.
First, Adama. I am a decent to good looking guy. You'd never know it because the lack of play that I get in life - but it's true.
cdn. Yes, I'm angry. I'm half Irish - give me a break. I also seem to be lacking this human quality that easily lets humans bond with each other, it's always been tough for me. I don't know why - I try, but I'm challenged in this department. I try and try but to no avail. I always have it in my head how I'm going to go, but when I go outside - and encounter people's faces, their prejudices and innate hostilities...their strange behaviors, ambivalent convoluted signals that often times make no sense - or seem to challenge me, even when I'm trying to be nice. It all goes out the window. .... and I'm left playing a game of - surviving on the turf/ blending as best I can, adapting. People are all different, they confuse me as I'm left trying to adapt to each one I meet. It seems like when I find this new way to be - I'm great. Until I meet someone which is ALL THE TIME, who I get a bad reaction with....or what I feel is a bad reaction. Life is confusing.
It's not fun, it's not enjoyable. I get this sense it's not like this for most people. I don't know what I'm doing wrong - or, what's wrong with me?
People have often verbalized it to me like this - "You think too much"
of course, this doesn't help and doesn't really describe anything. I've always felt it is a symptom of a problem rather than the problem itself - but people don't understand or get it, and I don't expect them to.
It seems to me that, most people don't think at all - maybe that's the secret, they just kind of go and blend like a fish with whatever comes their way. I don't know - it's the only thing I can think of, that makes sense.
I keep struggling with maybe it's a belief I'm holding somewhere, something. If I could just get that out the way, I'd be fine. But, I don't know...
It often seems I need to figure something out in my head somehow, have an axiom to hold onto. Then I'll be okay. Problem is, life doesn't work like that.
I don't know what to do. I've tried everything..
Last edited by Eric on September 1st, 2016, 9:09 am, edited 2 times in total.
Misery and happiness are only states of mind.
You went to the Philippines to get a woman. ANYONE can do that - don't make out you had a challenge there. Because you didn't.
See what I mean... I have never been to the Philippines to be honest... I mean... there has been no need up until now.
Ghost 'Waaaaaaaaah! Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah! Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!'
That's you - whinge, whine, moan and cry, you big f***ing baby.
You are NOT a prize, do you still wear that dirty kaftan?
Have you cut your hair yet?
Had a wash.
I am sure men who have grooming, style and wash regulary are something of a catch, yet.
You might see overweight women with normal to above average men - what you don't see is:
'Obese women with male model types'
Glad we can agree at last.
And then when the ring is on the finger, you'll be paying out, you wait and see - it won't be your dumbass fault - it will be hers and the matrix - you thick gullible c**t.
It would never happen to me because I would just let her go. She has something on you to use as a weapon if you get hitched, you wait and see.
You'll be a dad sooner than you think and you will blame the matrix - because - you are a f***ing dumbass.
At least you admit it.
Which is why you use it, go back through your posting history.
Then you use it then DON'T YOU?
And you call me dumb - f**k me - a cretin, a crybaby and needs a wash - what do you have going for you again?
Some shengnu are great man - I think your hatred for them comes from some repressed homoseuxuality - something you and Tapitito89 share in common.
I have a low sex drive. Which is why - when I become a father - I won't be blaming the matrix - I'll be ready.
I don't have a problem with women like a lot of the forum - I have to say this, life these past few years has been about making the best of myself. Something you could do with...
You could take time out to be learning a language, grooming, washing yourself, buy decent clothes - all that kind of thing you dirty scruff.
I know you don't, I know you have no dress sense, you don't wash - one day - a smart guy like you is going to work out how I know all this.
They're NOT - get rid of that kaftan - you dirty scruff.
Which is what Ghost calls anyone who washes regularly.
Last edited by yick on September 1st, 2016, 9:07 am, edited 1 time in total.
Are you SERIOUSLY complaining about people arguing on about a thread about you complaining?
You are doing something even more pointless than what we are doing!