HYPERGAMY - Why You Should Never Marry A Filipina

[Horahngee]

Oh my gosh! I currently have a Filipina girlfriend. She is a very nice person and seems genuine. I love her.

However..... A LOT, 100% of what this old fat white guy is saying in his video, are some of the warnings my mom's salon clients (and some of them are Filipino's too) have told my mom in terms of marrying a Filipina and bringing her to the US. This is why my kimchee-tiger Korean mom is highly against me marrying Grace. *sigh*

My mom,...sometimes is gullible when it comes to listening to other people. I have visited my GF's family in the Philippines, and while they are not super rich, they have a house, and their parents have retirement pensions from their previous jobs.

[ComingSoon]

I would love to hear some direct feedback to my situation. I am VERY skeptical of any woman and think I understand the dynamic of filipinas looking for a foreign husband. I have met and been laid by many filipinas. I have met crazy ones, gold diggers and sweet women that I just did not have a connection with. Bad English is hard for me to get past. I am not a love struck gullible foreigner, Im probably not in love at all. I have a young, way too young, 20 year old filipina gf and have known her for a year. I have listed to every word she speaks carefully and skeptically, looking for a crack in her story and her intentions. I am having a hared time finding any problem with this girl. I met her online, she lives in Davao with her family and speaks good English. When we first met I saw her for three months while seeing other girls at the same time. She knew I was seeing other girls. She is adopted by her aunt when she was very young because her parents died. So she might not be as dedicated to the family as a girl that grows up with her natural parents. She has two sisters, that are really her cousins and they married foreigners. She told me plainly that she knew she wanted to marry a foreigner since she was 12. One of her sisters is about 26, has two children by her husband who is now 70. I met them and he talked highly of the family. Especially her adopted parents. Her other sister married an American who has died of cancer after 10 years of marriage and there was also a large age gap. She now lives in the US with the mother in law with their one daughter. My gf spent allot of time with this sister and her American husband and this is where she got her desire to marry a foreigner. As a child she loved him. She thinks Americans are generally sweet and handsome. I am 50 years old and in good shape. Not particularly good looking but have been told dozens and dozens of time how gwapo I am by many filipinas from 15 year old, many in their 20's to old ladies probably in their 70's. My point is at least they think I am good looking. I have a fun and happy personality and I have money to spend. When I first met her in person we spent the three months together when I was not seeing other girls. Even though I was not looking for a permanent relationship I am considering one with this girl. I traveled from the US to see her again in July for 6 weeks and we spent the whole six weeks traveling together. We had a few problems getting along but nothing unusual and she quickly got over things. Truly nothing serious, just moody stuff. She does not seem to be plastic at all. She lets me know when she is not happy with me and sometimes it is my fault. She does not laugh at all my jokes and fawn over me, hang on me or act fake in any way. I just returned from another three months that we spend together traveling around the Philippines. This time we got along much better. I think we are just getting used to each other and the learning to live with each others differences. My gf has had one other bf whom she gave her virginity, she says. She is a total sex maniac. We were in bed on our second date. She loves it all. You name it and she likes it as long as it is only us. But not threesomes or swinging, etc. She went the whole time the first three months and the 6 weeks in July without having an orgasm. She did not try to fake it even though she know it was important to me that she get there. I tried it all but I just could not make it happen. But once she had her first one she can get there most of the time now. Im sure she is not faking it. She initiates aggressively although in the beginning she would initiate subtly. She does not wear make up and usually does not dress up much although she likes fashion. She will throw on shorts and one of my white t shirts and go to breakfast. She is a little above average in looks for a filipina but not smoking hot. For me she is a 10 only because she is my type. A friend of mine saw her photo and said "she dont do nothing for me". I guess my question is could this girl be real. I mean she really thinks she is in love with me. Or so she says and acts like it. And assuming for a moment she is actually in love how do I spend my life with her. I have decided that living in the Philippines would be difficult for me just because the place has so many negatives. But I see the danger in bringing her to the US. Even though she is an average filipina, she might be considered and exotic woman here and even if not smoking hot I can see many men closer to her age wanting to f**k her. Possibly over time as I get old she might give in to their advances. This only one concern, there are many. I think she is sincere but I dont know if I can ever take the chance and go all the way with this relationship. But she seems perfect for me. Im not sure what kind of feedback I am looking for here. Just honestly please. Thanks

[publicduende]

I would love to hear some direct feedback to my situation. I am VERY skeptical of any woman and think I understand the dynamic of filipinas looking for a foreign husband. I have met and been laid by many filipinas. I have met crazy ones, gold diggers and sweet women that I just did not have a connection with. Bad English is hard for me to get past. I am not a love struck gullible foreigner, Im probably not in love at all. I have a young, way too young, 20 year old filipina gf and have known her for a year. I have listed to every word she speaks carefully and skeptically, looking for a crack in her story and her intentions. I am having a hared time finding any problem with this girl. I met her online, she lives in Davao with her family and speaks good English. When we first met I saw her for three months while seeing other girls at the same time. She knew I was seeing other girls. She is adopted by her aunt when she was very young because her parents died. So she might not be as dedicated to the family as a girl that grows up with her natural parents. She has two sisters, that are really her cousins and they married foreigners. She told me plainly that she knew she wanted to marry a foreigner since she was 12. One of her sisters is about 26, has two children by her husband who is now 70. I met them and he talked highly of the family. Especially her adopted parents. Her other sister married an American who has died of cancer after 10 years of marriage and there was also a large age gap. She now lives in the US with the mother in law with their one daughter. My gf spent allot of time with this sister and her American husband and this is where she got her desire to marry a foreigner. As a child she loved him. She thinks Americans are generally sweet and handsome. I am 50 years old and in good shape. Not particularly good looking but have been told dozens and dozens of time how gwapo I am by many filipinas from 15 year old, many in their 20's to old ladies probably in their 70's. My point is at least they think I am good looking. I have a fun and happy personality and I have money to spend. When I first met her in person we spent the three months together when I was not seeing other girls. Even though I was not looking for a permanent relationship I am considering one with this girl. I traveled from the US to see her again in July for 6 weeks and we spent the whole six weeks traveling together. We had a few problems getting along but nothing unusual and she quickly got over things. Truly nothing serious, just moody stuff. She does not seem to be plastic at all. She lets me know when she is not happy with me and sometimes it is my fault. She does not laugh at all my jokes and fawn over me, hang on me or act fake in any way. I just returned from another three months that we spend together traveling around the Philippines. This time we got along much better. I think we are just getting used to each other and the learning to live with each others differences. My gf has had one other bf whom she gave her virginity, she says. She is a total sex maniac. We were in bed on our second date. She loves it all. You name it and she likes it as long as it is only us. But not threesomes or swinging, etc. She went the whole time the first three months and the 6 weeks in July without having an orgasm. She did not try to fake it even though she know it was important to me that she get there. I tried it all but I just could not make it happen. But once she had her first one she can get there most of the time now. Im sure she is not faking it. She initiates aggressively although in the beginning she would initiate subtly. She does not wear make up and usually does not dress up much although she likes fashion. She will throw on shorts and one of my white t shirts and go to breakfast. She is a little above average in looks for a filipina but not smoking hot. For me she is a 10 only because she is my type. A friend of mine saw her photo and said "she dont do nothing for me". I guess my question is could this girl be real. I mean she really thinks she is in love with me. Or so she says and acts like it. And assuming for a moment she is actually in love how do I spend my life with her. I have decided that living in the Philippines would be difficult for me just because the place has so many negatives. But I see the danger in bringing her to the US. Even though she is an average filipina, she might be considered and exotic woman here and even if not smoking hot I can see many men closer to her age wanting to f**k her. Possibly over time as I get old she might give in to their advances. This only one concern, there are many. I think she is sincere but I dont know if I can ever take the chance and go all the way with this relationship. But she seems perfect for me. Im not sure what kind of feedback I am looking for here. Just honestly please. Thanks

I lived in Davao for 2.5 years before moving to Makati in February. After 2.5 years of continuous fumbling between mindless fun, frustration and sobering up cycles, I finally met the girl of my dreams: young, pretty, very well educated, with an international job, from an upper class family, speaks better English than me. Most importantly, I am 101% sure he loves me for who I am, not for what I have or (materially) can give her. As per earlier post, she is learning her ropes sex-wise but we're improving fast.

Looks like you are still at the honeymoon stage with your Davaoena gf. I can imagine she's the typical morena type, with an above-average sex drive and plenty of reasons to stick to you. So long she is not insisting about moving to the US, you might consider visiting her often, if your job permits. The problem is that, if you won't commit to spending most of your time with her, your relationship with her is bound to deteriorate. She will eventually decide that you are going nowhere and look elsewhere, after making up a stupid excuse. I have met countless girls in Davao who pulled that trick to their foreign boyfriends far away...still professing their unconditional love online while being ever so happy to meet men in town and even bed them, in the hope that they will live with them. As soon as they realise it's time to upgrade, believe me, they will.

My business partner and very good friend, who lives in London, had the courage to take it all the way. He basically hooked up with, literally, the first Filipina who talked to him on FB. She's not the gold digger type, but definitely a girl who knew very well that her only chance to a better life would be to marry a foreigner. My friend is the perfect man: still young in his late 30's, very well established financially, good looking, very well educated and, most importantly, loyal and sweet. She is a very average, perhaps below-average morena, without much in the way of an education, ambitions and family background. She went from a 60-something Scandinavian bf who beat her up and spent her meager wages on beer to a French young gentleman from London, with plenty of money and love to give. She couldn't have been luckier.

They got married in Hong Kong a couple of months ago. She is waiting for her paperwork to move to London with him and live a life even my gf, despite all the travelling she did, could only dream of.

What I am trying to say is: do not commit to any Pinay girl, especially from provincial places like Davao, until you are 100% sure you can live with her stably and trust her completely. Unfortunately most men have full-time jobs and (in the US at least) a meager 10/15 days a year of holidays, and do not have this luxury. Trust on a distance relationship is their capital sin, and one they can't avoid. I was lucky because I got divorced, have no kids and tried to establish myself here, so I could work and earn my money here. I have a failed business in Davao (which is why I moved to Makati) but now things finally seem to be on the up, in the right direction. And I have a wonderful fiancee I can trust and with whom I can look forward to a solid relationship.

Good luck.

[ComingSoon]

Thanks ublicduende for your response. I have my own business and spent 4 and 1/2 months in the Philippines last year and not three months this year. Most of it was with her. It still does not seem like enough to head off trouble. I have read so many horror stories that I am not sure I can ever trust a fulipina. And of course I dont trust American women either. She is not educated but did finish high school. She went to two years of college but then dropped out to spend time with me, which I did not know until it was done. She has never pressured me to do anything, including move to the US. She has made it clear that we can live wherever I want including in her parents house in the Philippines. Now I know she could just be saying some of these things but my eyes are wide open as I said. Her sisters husband did live in their house for years. That is when she spend so much time with him and developed this desire to have a foreigner of her own. WE have been working on her visa, starting with a birth certificate that had mistakes. Got that fixed and also have her passport. She subtly let me know that she did not want to come to the US and put pressure on me to marry her. I told her that my intention was for her to VISIT here and go home to think and continue to get to know each other. She agreed and requested that we have dinner with her parents and tell them our plans which we did and they agreed. Her family is quite poor. I have seen many houses there and there house, which is rented, is typical of a poor family, well below our standards. They basically have nothing. Her mom runs a small sari sari and a small kitchen to make ends meet. Her other two sisters live at home with husbands that work but the girls are fat and lazy. If she was a blood sister of these girls I would run. At present my gf seems to be totally sold out on me. The thing that has bothered me from the beginning is that on our second meeting she practically raped me. We had wild sex for three hours and she seemed quite experienced. Because she had prior told me that she had limited experience I have never fully trusted her. We have discussed this at length and I have accepted her story for the most part. Her long story made short was that she met the foreigner she wanted, me, and was not going to let him get away. She also knew I had been f**king other girls before I met her. Also she was introduced to porn at a young age and she likes to look at it further fueling her lust. She said that I was so sweet that it melted her and she wanted me. Her sister who came with her on our first meeting told her not to see me again. But she snuck away to see me and we ended up in bed. It was all her that got us there. I will say that most of the girls I spent any time with at all it was easy to get into bed on the second date or even the within the first hours of our first meeting. One girl in Manila, after a couple of hours of talking at a restaurant, we stopped by my room to drop off my backpack, with no intention of trying anything sexual with her. She laid on the bed and gave me a look that told me she wants it, and we did. This girl was absolutely not a working girl and we spent the next two weeks together. She wanted to continue the relationship but I knew from the beginning that she was not really my type, although she was really pretty and had a rockin body. But she, as well as others jumped right into bed with me. Some girls that jumped right into bed with me did need money. Not working girls but broke. My gf never ask for anything and would not even accept anything early on. Maybe she is smart and playing me from the beginning, I dont really think so. Still that second meeting where she raped me slightly plagues my mind of what kind of girl she really is. I have tried to understand how the fiipina thinks. But it is just so different than what I am used to. The girls are so eager and willing, even my little Pinay.

[publicduende]

@@ComingSoon, 4 1/2 months or 3 months sound pretty solid amounts of time to spend in the Philippines, "getting to know" your Pinay girl. If she doesn't give you any pressure to take things further, then the chances are higher that she may be meeting other foreigners while you're away.

Davao might not be an expat paradise like Dumaguete but it does sport a good (and increasing) number of foreign men, many of whom pretty young and decent looking. Many of these men come to Davao with the intention to stay there for a few years, supporting themselves with online jobs, or even start local BPO-like businesses. All of these men are settled in Davao and a constant temptation for any girl, over the typical "spotty" distance relationship.

I would say your gut instinct of not trusting Filipinas is right. Unless the girl has a specific intention, or is having pressure from her family, to move abroad, she will be perfectly fine dating foreigners living locally and always available. They will prefer that to committing to a man and be loyal to them until their next visit. Believe me, all of them say they are 100% loyal and spend everyday video chatting or messaging with their men far away, and (almost) all of them f*ck other men behind their back, Pinoy and foreigner alike.

Even if it sounds cynical, I would advise you continue to extract good times from your occasional visits to your girl but never commit until you decide that you can spend 100% of your time with her. Either you in the Philippines or her in your country.

[ComingSoon]

I really do realize that she could be doing anything while I am away even though as you say she text messages me constantly. If I had to make a judgment call I would say she is not f**king other men. She lives at home with her parents and sisters who watch her like hawk because the sisters are looking for any type of gossip on her to spread thru fb. A girl friend of mine is friends with her on fb and she is clean there. Now I know she can communicate with guys in many ways besides fb. She is certainly not pressuring me to move to the US but we have been working on her fiance visa. It started with correcting a mistake on her birth certificate, then her passport and finally we did the paperwork at a visa service company. She wants to visit here and we have agreed that it is only a visit but we will not marry at this time. She seems good with that. YES she wants to marry as most women do. Im sure she would like to move to the US although she says we can live anywhere, even stay with her parents. I almost believe her because her sisters husband lived with them for years. If she f**ks other men she will probably get pregnant and that will be that. I have had a vasectomy.

[Johnny1975]

Thanks ublicduende for your response. I have my own business and spent 4 and 1/2 months in the Philippines last year and not three months this year. Most of it was with her. It still does not seem like enough to head off trouble. I have read so many horror stories that I am not sure I can ever trust a fulipina. And of course I dont trust American women either. She is not educated but did finish high school. She went to two years of college but then dropped out to spend time with me, which I did not know until it was done. She has never pressured me to do anything, including move to the US. She has made it clear that we can live wherever I want including in her parents house in the Philippines. Now I know she could just be saying some of these things but my eyes are wide open as I said. Her sisters husband did live in their house for years. That is when she spend so much time with him and developed this desire to have a foreigner of her own. WE have been working on her visa, starting with a birth certificate that had mistakes. Got that fixed and also have her passport. She subtly let me know that she did not want to come to the US and put pressure on me to marry her. I told her that my intention was for her to VISIT here and go home to think and continue to get to know each other. She agreed and requested that we have dinner with her parents and tell them our plans which we did and they agreed. Her family is quite poor. I have seen many houses there and there house, which is rented, is typical of a poor family, well below our standards. They basically have nothing. Her mom runs a small sari sari and a small kitchen to make ends meet. Her other two sisters live at home with husbands that work but the girls are fat and lazy. If she was a blood sister of these girls I would run. At present my gf seems to be totally sold out on me. The thing that has bothered me from the beginning is that on our second meeting she practically raped me. We had wild sex for three hours and she seemed quite experienced. Because she had prior told me that she had limited experience I have never fully trusted her. We have discussed this at length and I have accepted her story for the most part. Her long story made short was that she met the foreigner she wanted, me, and was not going to let him get away. She also knew I had been f**king other girls before I met her. Also she was introduced to porn at a young age and she likes to look at it further fueling her lust. She said that I was so sweet that it melted her and she wanted me. Her sister who came with her on our first meeting told her not to see me again. But she snuck away to see me and we ended up in bed. It was all her that got us there. I will say that most of the girls I spent any time with at all it was easy to get into bed on the second date or even the within the first hours of our first meeting. One girl in Manila, after a couple of hours of talking at a restaurant, we stopped by my room to drop off my backpack, with no intention of trying anything sexual with her. She laid on the bed and gave me a look that told me she wants it, and we did. This girl was absolutely not a working girl and we spent the next two weeks together. She wanted to continue the relationship but I knew from the beginning that she was not really my type, although she was really pretty and had a rockin body. But she, as well as others jumped right into bed with me. Some girls that jumped right into bed with me did need money. Not working girls but broke. My gf never ask for anything and would not even accept anything early on. Maybe she is smart and playing me from the beginning, I dont really think so. Still that second meeting where she raped me slightly plagues my mind of what kind of girl she really is. I have tried to understand how the fiipina thinks. But it is just so different than what I am used to. The girls are so eager and willing, even my little Pinay.

I want to to read this. But my eyes would hurt.

[ComingSoon]

Johnny, wouldn't want to hurt your eyes, or stretch your brain beyond its opacity. Anyone else want to weigh in?

[publicduende]

I really do realize that she could be doing anything while I am away even though as you say she text messages me constantly. If I had to make a judgment call I would say she is not f**king other men. She lives at home with her parents and sisters who watch her like hawk because the sisters are looking for any type of gossip on her to spread thru fb. A girl friend of mine is friends with her on fb and she is clean there. Now I know she can communicate with guys in many ways besides fb. She is certainly not pressuring me to move to the US but we have been working on her fiance visa. It started with correcting a mistake on her birth certificate, then her passport and finally we did the paperwork at a visa service company. She wants to visit here and we have agreed that it is only a visit but we will not marry at this time. She seems good with that. YES she wants to marry as most women do. Im sure she would like to move to the US although she says we can live anywhere, even stay with her parents. I almost believe her because her sisters husband lived with them for years. If she f**ks other men she will probably get pregnant and that will be that. I have had a vasectomy.

The fact itself that you are already working towards a fiancee Visa for her is a huge deal for her. She know it's only a matter of time before she will tie the knot and be whisked off to the US to live with you. And in the meantime, she can always enjoy your occasional visits. This change things: she will be faithful to you, she would be insane to risk spoiling all this for a fling.

If that is the case, I believe you, she won't be unfaithful. But then the question is: are you prepared to marry her and take care of her and her family for the rest of your life? This is what happens with Filipinas. Even if your girl will put no pressure to give gifts and handouts to those around her, Filipino culture has so many traditional events when the rich ones in the family are supposed to step in and buy food, toys for the kids, pay for the beach outing and the decorations, etc.

And I haven't even started talking about those phony invitations to be someone's godfather (ninong): it's every family's dream to have a foreigner as their child's godfather, as the chance to get a quality gift or a red envelope with a few thousands is much higher.

In short: if you do want to walk the path of fiancee Visa leading to marriage, please make sure she is absolutely the best Filipina girl you can think of.

[Johnny1975]

Johnny, wouldn't want to hurt your eyes, or stretch your brain beyond its opacity. Anyone else want to weigh in?

If you use paragraphs, people will be more inclined to take the time to read what you have to say. Authors, journalists, bloggers and most posters on forums have the courtesy to do it, and I don't think you're important enough for me to make the effort to wade through that massive wall of text. Maybe you said something worth reading, or maybe you spouted a load of crap. At this point it doesn't even matter.

[Paul Ferrel]

Hi guys! New here. I was searching for articles on Filipina hypergamy and found this discussion. Too bad the embedded Youtube video is down.

In anycase, I think this article may help guys weed out bad choices for LTRs. It seems most of the guys who get into LTRs Filipinas or women of any nationality simply ignored these RED FLAGS and then start bawling about being mistreated.

https://socialmediasoup.org/raffy-tulfo ... ino-women/

In business and in love, it's still caveat emptor. If you get really good at spotting high risk and low return situations before they happen, you'll be better off down the road.

[Taco]

I have met and been laid by many filipinas.

If you can't stay with one woman there's no point in getting married.

I've lived in Cebu for 7 years now and I've been faithful to my wife during that time. However, I've had 1000 women flirting with me sometimes when my wife is with me. Even had Lesbians flirting with me if that makes any sense, its a crazy country sometimes.

[Winston]

Interetsing video by Filipina Pea about the pros and cons of marrying a Filipina vs just living with her, or cohabitating with her. She makes sense as usual and her answers are nuanced, not black and white. So her common sense and wisdom is quite good for a Filipina. What you think @publicduende?



In this other video she talks to a Filipina attorney about how to protect your assets from your Filipina wife and why you should have a prenup agreement, which in the PH is honored unlike the US.

[publicduende]

Interetsing video by Filipina Pea about the pros and cons of marrying a Filipina vs just living with her, or cohabitating with her. She makes sense as usual and her answers are nuanced, not black and white. So her common sense and wisdom is quite good for a Filipina. What you think @publicduende?

She is not saying anything remotely specific to the Filipino or Filipina. All women, after marriage, tend to loosen up and lose that discipline and commitment, not only in terms of physical appearance but also in terms of moral qualities. With Filipinas, if anything, the situation is even worse, since Filipinos notoriously lack discipline and love eating yummy and unhealthy food.

As with women from any culture in the world, the only safety anchor is in her upbringing. If she comes from a family who got her used to eat little and healthy, take constant care of herself, study/work hard, etc. then it's more likely that those quality will stay with her after marriage and throughout her entire life.

You might be surprised to know that these young women do exist in the Philippines, and, even though they are a minority, they are a vocal minority indeed. Most of them are from Chinese-Filipino families, usually the scion of wealthy business and political families. These people are usually groomed since childhood to be the new generation of leaders of their dinasties. They are brought up by tiger moms, aunties, the lot. Then they get educated at strict Jesuit universities (Ateneo de Manila is full of these types, my wife went there and confirms!), often abroad. By 20 they have already covered a management role at their family business, or manned a startup, sometimes both at the same time.

They hit the gym inside their luxury condos, often much better equipped than the best public franchises. They work hard, play hard and pamper themselves hard.

Sadly for (most of) us, those formidable "Miss Perfect" usually look up, not down, for potential relationships. They are typically looking for someone who is similar to them, just better: better looking, better status, better physique, better financial situation, et cetera. Most foreigners who venture to the Philippines with the "mail order bride, pick-up lane" mentality, start as far as it gets from those kinds of women. Yes, even in the Philippines

In this other video she talks to a Filipina attorney about how to protect your assets from your Filipina wife and why you should have a prenup agreement, which in the PH is honored unlike the US.

This is very true. After some time in the 90s, changes in marriage legislation meant that the "default" mode when marrying in the Philippines is "all assets acquired after marriage are automatically shared, 50/50". The only way to assert otherwise, e.g. that the couple holds ownership of all assets in proportion to the amount spent to acquire them (in most cases, husband's at 100%), is to have a prenuptial agreement. This is what I did, with C.