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What happens to the bar girls after 30

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What happens to the bar girls after 30

Postby gmm567 » Thu Mar 05, 2009 7:32 pm

I wonder what they do? Most philipinos won't marry them. Do they save their money and retire? Do they burn it all up on drugs? Anyone know what happens to them?
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Postby ladislav » Thu Mar 05, 2009 8:19 pm

It is a mystery. Like where do animals/birds go to die.

Here is a good thread on that:

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index ... 127AAkP5rU
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Postby gmm567 » Thu Mar 05, 2009 10:38 pm

yes I see . It's hard to say.If they save their money they can go to school, open a business. Some may be facing bleaker futures; we just don't know.
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Postby Mr S » Fri Mar 06, 2009 5:42 pm

Well I'm probably the best one that can answer this question as I have slept and gotten to know many over the years and talked to them, so here goes:

First, there are different types of bar girls:

1. Ones that got got devirginized when they were a teen by their "pinoy" boyfriend, family found out and got kicked out, so now they are on their own.
2. Got knocked up by their "pinoy" BF and he left her so now she has to take care of the kid on her own.
3. She comes from a large family in the province and she is the oldest and has to send money back to send her siblings to school and whatever else reasons; essentially sacrificing her life for her family's sake. (always the oldest daughter who does this it seems)
4. Met a friend who is visiting the province and tells and shows her how much money she is making in the city. Her friend convinces her to try to be a "waitress", but ends up settling into the bar life. These girls are potentially the good girls that you can meet in the bar if you can find them early, as they can be saved if they meet the right guy, as most of them don't really like it but get sucked into the lifestyle and money with few other options.
5. Province girl who knows she is "hot" decides to use her body and looks to make money in the bars, she enjoys the lifestyle and money she makes and thinks she has moved her "status" up in her own mind. These girls range from nice to super bitches, usually depends how smart they are emotionally and intellectually. (also if they use drugs or not)
6. Girls who are pretty and looking to meet a foreigner to marry and will do it anyway possible, even working in the bar. Usually these girls are smart and shrewed, usually did not finish high school, but very street smart. They know how to tun a guy on and what to say. Their main objective is to meet a foreign guy, they also may try to get pregnant as well by one to get him to commit to her. (this usually backfires) I've met many girls that fit this criteria, and actually many succeeded in meeting a guy to take them away. Usually these guys are over 40 and kinda clueless about what these girls lives are really like, falling for their looks and sweet charms. I've slept with many girls who were talking to their "foreigner BF" on their cell phone while in my room. So you dumbass guys who think you can take the bar out of a bargirl without being in the country to micromanage her movements, think again. They are enjoying the money you send them while also banging guy friends they know on the side! I even had a previous bar girl I met in Angeles who was a "looker" for sure, she is currently married with two kids, I think the first one is with another guy. She was propositioning me to get with her on the side still. Unless you can be around a bargirl 24/7, i suggest not getting into a relationship with one.
7. Pinoy BF makes her work in the bar because it is easy money for him and he doesn't care that she is sleeping with foreigner guys as long as he gets all her money. Usually he is using drugs, or gambling or some other kinds of debts. These girls are sometimes really hot, but there is nothing a foreigner can do for them as they are stuck in their position with their feelings securing their place.
8. She is supporting herself to save money to go to school or finish school. There is a small minority who dos this, but "VERY" small minority. I do know a couple of girls who were successful in their endeavor and one of them actually met an American guy and moved there. But she was a smart one, rare here.
9. The girl is a party girl and likes the nightlife such as sex, drugs, music, dancing, money, all that stuff. These are the ones you want to avoid if your a whorist pro as they tend to be gold diggers and only happy as long as you can keep the money flowing.
10. Testing the waters, she used to work in a traditional store but wants to make more money, heard working in the bar makes good money. A majority of newbies fit this description. They are usually in their early 20's and not sure what really goes on. Usually clinging to another girl in the bar to provide emotional support. I would say more than half quit within the first week or two, if they last that long. If you can grab one before they leave or personality changes from working there, sometimes they can be a good find.

These are rough estimates of where the girls are coming from and why, I'm sure there are more reasons but the above are the gist of it. Now where do they all go when they start hitting their mid twenties and upwards? Here is my take:

1. Some become mammasan's, at least the smarter and more dominant ones do. I've seen them all the way up into their 40's. they don't have to be lookers, just very shrewd and knows how to work a customer to spend money. Also they need to be able to handle younger girls, often times they can appear to be bitches if you observe how they treat their "girls". But usually girls follow mammasan's around so a good one can bring new girls and business to a bar, at least in Angeles, Makati is more walk in applicants it seems.
2. A small percentage get married, although this is difficult when they hit their mid 20's as you can start to see the tread wear on the tire. I've noticed if you treat them nice and they like you they will go out of their way to please you as I guess they are going all out to sell themselves to you. There are some really nice ones out there, most of them have at least one kid though so there is baggage, but they have rolled the dice and lost, waiting too long to find a decent guy while they were still decent looking and young.
3. Some go over to Hong Kong, Singapore or other foreign city and work the bars there, trying their luck as they can still pull customers in these cities, usually they are freelancers by this time.
4. They become freelancers at bars where foreigners frequent like LA Cafe or Park Square bars in Makati. Whoring themselves out is all they know how to do. Girls that do this are usually on a downward spiral and if they don't have a strong mind get sucked into drugs and all that.
5. Some go back to live with their families in the city or province, I've met a few girls who did this. Some will go back to the province and set up their own little store or business if they were smart enough to save some money to do this. Some of the mart ones bought property or a house already for their family so they just move back there. Usually they already have a kid or two loving there from the bar life so they just go back to raise them and make some small money.
6. Some try to find legitimate work overseas as a maid, factory worker, care giver, child keeper, etc. But I think these are a minority as backgrounds are usually looked into.
7. the rest fade away, they die, disappear, get into drugs, hang around the wrong crowd, etc. There is ageism in the Philippines and by late 20's girls think they are old maids and their actions and mentality show it off. They won't go back to school and they won't date men generally, they just go back to the province and wallow in their past and hope that their son or daughter will have a better life than them.

Basically, the girl either survives and admits that life is over and leaves to go back with her family or she keeps the lifestyle going by becoming a mamasan, freelancer or streetwalker. The society looks down upon bar girls and generally the average person can tell what they are by their mannerisms and style. They are just cast out and hopefully they made good decisions in life when they were young, if not they probably will have a rough life 30 and up.

My take if you have to have a bar girl as a GF make sure she is in her late tees/early twenties and that she is interested in learning a job skill or finishing school. Try not to be involved with a girl with a large family, basically 3 or more brothers and sisters. It's almost impossible to find a girl with no or only one brother or sister, but many have 5+ brothers/sisters, I've known many who have 8,9,10 even! I don't care how beautiful she looks or how tight an shiny her p***y is, your life will be miserable if you get involved with a girl with a huge, poor family. Do not get involved with a pro bar girl. Pick the newbies. The pro may seem more fun and interesting but she has been mentally damaged and over the long run cannot be trusted. You can usually spot these as these are the ones that do the sexy shows in the bars or are very outgoing and overly aggressive with customers in the bars. Whenever you enter a bar and you have an interest in a girl you need to observe her body language and how she acts. I suggest reading up on body language as it can help "immensely", as you can spot a lot of positive and negative signs that can lead you to whether you will have a good or bad experience. Actually I will go so far as to recommend a book that I have and say is really good and has helped me:

http://www.amazon.com/Definitive-Book-B ... 655&sr=1-1

Anyways I have gotten to know a lot about bargirls, especially Filipina's. There are just as many good ones as bad ons out there. Playing around in the bars can be fun, if you don't take it seriously. You can take it seriously after you have been able to live the lifestyle for a couple of years and know the ups and downs related to it. You cannot understand it by living in a western country and visiting on vacations, even if you do this regularly. You have to live overseas, particularly in the Philippines or nearby where you can come and go regularly.

To be honest I do not go out to the bars much anymore as I don't get the same "sexual titlilations" as I previously did. Now I'm not saying I don't like them still, I do, but I just don't go out every night to them like I used to. I've tempered myself a bit. Perhaps this is just a phase and in the future I will be a super horn dog again and go crazy, but I don't see that happening. Perhaps if I went to Thailand for a few weeks I'd fall into debauchery as I don't get there much and its something different. But there is not much else to the bars in Philippines once you have lived here for a few years.

Any girly oriented bar in the Philippines is still better than any bar in America though!
"The object of life is not to be on the side of the majority but to escape finding oneself in the ranks of the insane." Marcus Aurelius, Roman Emperor and stoic philosopher, 121-180 A.D.
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Postby ladislav » Fri Mar 06, 2009 8:01 pm

Bravo! A dissertation! Can I feature it on my blogsite with a proper reference?

I would like to add a few things:

There are some girls there with fake IDs that lie about the name and the age. There are also ( you will be surprised) virgin girls who have never been with a guy and who are scared to sit with one- these are usually new ones. I have a good knack of telling virgins from non virgins in SE Asia ( after 19 years in the region).
I have saved quite a few girls early, one girl ( an avowed virgin) is now getting ready to get her BA, one got a BS already, one is studying HS now at 19, I am also sending her to a vocational weekend course. All this has been surprisingly cheap and they are grateful. But in that part of the world there are also a big number of unwise and emotional girls who do not have the will power to follow through. The attrition rate is over 50% overall. There are also lots of scammers that prey upon your kindness and invent sub stories requesting money for imaginary courses and medical tests and seminars that never take place. Eventually they get caught because they are just not such good liars. Good girls overall are some 10-15% and you need to wade through many bad and no account ones before you find jewels but once you find them and help them, you will have changed another person's life forever.
Saving a gorgeous damsel in distress from falling off a cliff into the maw of sin is very fulfilling.
Last edited by ladislav on Sat Mar 07, 2009 3:13 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Postby gmm567 » Fri Mar 06, 2009 8:55 pm

Excellent post,s. You are one amazing resource. I'll have to read and reread that.

That should go into the "Best of" file.

I could see doing the same thing you're doing ladislav. Helping one of them get an education.
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Postby ladislav » Sat Mar 07, 2009 3:22 am

Thanks, I am thinking of writing an article with the title of "look who the devil dragged in". it is not the druggies, the gang girls that end up in the bars but because of the economy, there are pastors' daughters, accounting students ( smarter than me) and lots and lots of farmer girls ( very naive).

I got one college student ( accounting and business, 19 years old) out. She was most definitely a virgin and she hated being there and she just left. I called her and she pleaded with me- "I have no money to pay for my tuition!" Guess how much it was- it was $60. I would periodically send her $30, $50 and take her shopping for clothes and toiletries. Such a sweet, very pure, very smart person. Recently I sent her some $53 to cover the cost of graduation ceremonies.
Such small monies make an enormous difference in other people's future which was hanging by a thread before you came.

The sweetest words I had ever heard have been: "I don't know where my life would have been now if it wasn't for you!"
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Postby gmm567 » Sat Mar 07, 2009 4:48 am

wow...that definitely sounds like the thing to do. $63 in tuition. f**k. I would definitely be doing that, and it sounds like you 've accumulated some wisdom in that regard in terms of the ins and outs of doing it.
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Do you think the bar girls are harmed pschologically and

Postby gmm567 » Sat Mar 07, 2009 4:52 am

emotionally from what they've choosen to do? Is that maybe why sex tourism is condemned.

I mean on the one hand--I say, two people should be able to do what they want if they aggre too it.
And sex should be something that people can enjoy. But on the other hand maybe it does damage them. I don't know. Wonder what you guys think.
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Postby Mr S » Sat Mar 07, 2009 9:41 am

I don't care if you link it, it has a number of spelling errors though and I don't feel like editing it right now.

I do agree that there are some girls who are younger than 18 in the bars with fake ID's, but they usually fall under one of the above reasons why they are in the bar. I'm not so hung up on age as what western countries push down our throat as the "appropriate" age to have sex as you can't eliminate thousands of years of genetic selection in less than 50 with an 18 and over policy.. sorry doesn't jive, and still doesn't with the majority of countries in the world. I agree that emotionally and mentally people under 18 may not be ready for sexual relations, even ones over 18 aren't, but physically, generally they are and you can't go against this fact due to political correctness and radical feminism.

One thing to be aware of is tuition varies depending on the location and quality of the school. I think most decent schools are going to charge between 100-300 dollars per semester. The smaller tuitions are usually for smaller, no name schools who's credentials are a bit spotty. Also the type of degree the person is trying to achieve matters a lot also. Obviously universities are going to be more expensive in the Manila area then some bumpkin college in the province...

And yes most girls are in the bar because of money, for one reason or another. Either through bad choices in life or some other financial commitments.

I think whether working as a bar girl damages someone, it depends on the intellectual and emotional maturity of the girl in question. Some girls are leaders and other followers, others are independent, and more need to be around others to be full filled. Taking this into account the ones that can successfully survive an environment like that would be the smart, emotionally stable, independent and more loner types. the mor follower types that let others do their thinking for them usually get sucked into the overly bad side of it, and never escape.

With any endeavor in life there are risks. I think if a girl is smart she can meet a decent guy that can take her away from the scene. The ones who don't get is because of their own poor decision making skills or what not. There are too many factors to consider in this, you cant change the circumstances so just live your own life as best your can and if you run into some that you think you can save and trust, then its up to you if you want to help them or not.

But many do not have the fortitude to go through school or the mental durability...
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Re: Do you think the bar girls are harmed pschologically and

Postby ladislav » Sat Mar 07, 2009 1:30 pm

gmm567 wrote:emotionally from what they've choosen to do? Is that maybe why sex tourism is condemned.

I mean on the one hand--I say, two people should be able to do what they want if they aggre too it.
And sex should be something that people can enjoy. But on the other hand maybe it does damage them. I don't know. Wonder what you guys think.


Two people agree on sex because normally they are attracted to each other. An 18 years old little angel is not attracted to a 55 year old, 300lbs smelly German who forces her to munch on his uncircumcised penis. Plus they are Catholic and they have been taught that prostitution is a sin, they know that now they are pariahs and no man will want them. They are called monkey girls by the Philippine society and thier status is lower than that of a garbage collector. I guess some like it but most do not.
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Postby ladislav » Sat Mar 07, 2009 1:38 pm

gmm567 wrote:wow...that definitely sounds like the thing to do. $63 in tuition. f**k. I would definitely be doing that, and it sounds like you 've accumulated some wisdom in that regard in terms of the ins and outs of doing it.


I stand corrected. The prices she quoted was how much she was lacking, not the tuition itself. The tuition is still some $100-300 per semester and that is still quite good.

One non PC conclusion is that some girls are in bars not because they are unfortunate but because they are plain stupid. So, you will need to have thier IQ tested. Some girls that I tried to help went to school but failed the exams. They just did not have what it takes. With girls like that, you may want to send them to some culinary school or a hairdressing school. That should be easier for them.

In the Philippines degrees, schools, uniforms, proms mean a lot! Education is religion there. Even a poor person with several degrees would be respected by all people in society.
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Postby James G » Tue May 05, 2009 7:48 pm

What happens to bar girls after 30


They become aggressive old bargirls - lol




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Postby WorldTraveler » Thu May 21, 2009 6:11 pm

Mr J thanks for the eloquent expose on “What happens to bar girls after 30 and the reasons they become bar girls. Excellent!

Of the 8 reasons what % makeup each? I see many girls fall into more than one catagory. I usually hear a combination that they are there to make money and find a BF/husband. Or maybe that’s just what they tell me.

I do know where some of the old bar girls go, they go to Pattaya Thailand. There are tons of old ones there in the beer bars. In 40s maybe 50s, haggard looking. Or go to the “soapysâ€￾ and there are tons of old ones behind the glass windows.

Mr. J. and Ladislav how long can a girl work in a bar and be “savedâ€￾ and still make a decent girl friend? My thought is the ones that don’t like it get out quick, the others that like it better than another job stay. Can these girls be good girl friends or are they too far gone?
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Postby danxdan » Sun Jan 10, 2010 3:43 pm

uh oh. i think i fell in love a with Pro Bar Girl :roll:
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