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Pros and Cons of Living and Dating in the Philippines

Discuss culture, living, traveling, relocating, dating or anything related to the Asian countries - China, The Philippines, Thailand, etc.

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Caught up in what people think.

Postby Montanaland » Sat Apr 24, 2010 8:36 pm

I agree with globetrotter...as I have just learned in the last 5yrs that living a happy life is the ultimate goal. I can't tell you how many times I hear other peoples views and values on so many levels.

For instance regarding money.. my friends co-worker (they are basic claims adjusters) who's up here in MT from Denver puts his bullshit geography degree that he obtained when he was 33 ahead of any high paying blue collar job that won't enhance his resume. I too shared that same bullshit view in which I would rather take a $8hr job at a bank rather than a $18hr job driving a garbage truck. I have two friends that didn't even come close to graduating from college...with one working for Larsen Oil&Gas in Singapore for $2k a day..(u should see his house) and another driving truck in the oil patch making $90k a yr.

The winners of the rat-race in life wakes up everyday and can't wait to get to work..as those jobs are usually found through a personalty profile that spits out multiple career matches.

I personally like the 4hr work week model or whatever that means where you perform a very chill or non-arduous job in a cheap country filled with women the majority of your life while making a good living. Thats why most of us are on this forum.


Screw what these people think..as they are a dime a dozen. In Fuzzx's scenario you could target other chicas that same day you recieved some rejection message and be on some other path with another set of inlaws.
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Postby The_Adventurer » Mon Oct 25, 2010 12:26 am

I think the expensive = quality issue depends heavily on what type of product it is. My $20 Chinese DVD player was the best DVD player I ever own, even beating my previous $400 Pioneer player. It did everything. As for DVDs, a $1 pirated DVD looks identical to the real thing. It's digital! In some cases, the pirated DVD is really HD (not in the Phils, those are fakes).

Cars are another story. I drove a convertible Mustang. Not a cheap car, but no comparison to driving a BMW or Cadillac. (The latter 2 being the bosses cars, not mine) Have you ever worn a $2000 suit? You can wear it all day. It breathes. You don't get hot even with all those layers. A $200 suit is not even in the same league. A $20 camera will take pictures good enough for any personal needs, but if you are doing any professional work, you want the $1000 camera. It's not the digital parts that make the difference. It's the glass.

Rich girls are trouble. Sure, the family will not be asking anything from you. They might even help you, meaning they will help her, but they will be constantly telling her to leave you behind your back. Also rich girls are just plain demanding. They want to continue shopping the way they did with Daddy's money. The girl I dated in think no one in the family really liked me except her mother, but the whole family didn't like her either. It seems like if you don't follow the rules and do what they say, you get ostracized and cut off. They want to choose where you live, where you work and who you marry. One of her brothers was a huge disappointment to the family because, even though they found an incredibly gorgeous, model quality, business woman for him to marry, he ran off with the maid, who was supposedly ugly (I never saw her).

I would gladly support a poor family, especially if you get a gorgeous girl out of it. You know what? If you put aside $200 a month, I guarantee all their requests combined will never burn through it, unless you let them walk all over you. The dollar was a lot stronger when I was there, but I put girls through school, paid for family medical emergencies and many other things for pennies compared to doing such things at western prices. My American friend actually got his father-in-law out of jail when their pirate DVD store got raided. It cost, like $100 or so. But what you get in return cannot be put into words. That family loves him to death and will do anything for him.

When I was in Korea I told a guy there about how little it takes to support a girl, something like $200 a month. He said you can't even think about getting a girlfriend in Korea with that kind of money. He said she'll spend that on one shopping trip. He was right. My Korean girlfriend's old sister was blowing though about $1000 per week of her boyfriend's money. He left her and told me to get away from my girl as fast as possible. Had we made the right choices, who knows where we would be now. We were planning to make a kick-ass bodybuilding documentary, had funding, a buyer, big names and all (He was a champion and well known trainer), but we made stupid choices because of girls.

I've learned my lessons. I think it's great if you can find a job where you can't wait to get to work in the morning. That means your job is probably not work to you, but something fun that you love. I know many writers and artists in Hollywood like that. I think I found something like that here. Overtime means nothing. It's more difficult to get you out of the office. If you can find that and make a ton of money with it, you're set!
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Re: More info needed

Postby zzzz » Wed Oct 27, 2010 4:44 am

Winston wrote:I am in Angeles. You can get an apartment here for between 3000p and 12,000 depending on location and how big and furnished it is.

I have never had anything stolen in my apartment, even though I live in a Filipino neighborhood. But then again, Chinese are treated with respect here and Asian foreigners are not as targeted as badly as whites are. Plus I have a kind looking face that brings out kindness in others here.


Online all the apartments I've found with decent pictures seem to run closer to the 20,000+ and up range. I can't imagine finding anything good for 3,000. What's the likely price ranges for something close to the action? Ideally I'd love to be able to walk a lot or take a Jeepney. Having to take trikes a lot or rent a scooter adds up pretty quick.
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Postby The_Adventurer » Sun Oct 31, 2010 1:52 pm

You can find a very nice apartment for 3000, but it won't be online. Stuff online is catering to foreigners and they are severely marked up. If you want to find a nice place for 3000, hit the streets and walk around. Get a local paper and check the ads
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similar view

Postby starkeep » Mon Nov 01, 2010 12:26 am

8) i have the same view and experiences ofmany here. It seems to me also many foreignes are seen as santa clause. Many here that go there are mostly working class and times are getting much tuffer in theusa all the time. Maybe as conditions worsen in the usa noone will need to go anywhere it will be similar to the pi and the people that came here will leave because the currency and economykeeps getting worse.
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Re: More info needed

Postby Winston » Mon Nov 01, 2010 1:46 pm

zzzz wrote:
Winston wrote:I am in Angeles. You can get an apartment here for between 3000p and 12,000 depending on location and how big and furnished it is.

I have never had anything stolen in my apartment, even though I live in a Filipino neighborhood. But then again, Chinese are treated with respect here and Asian foreigners are not as targeted as badly as whites are. Plus I have a kind looking face that brings out kindness in others here.


Online all the apartments I've found with decent pictures seem to run closer to the 20,000+ and up range. I can't imagine finding anything good for 3,000. What's the likely price ranges for something close to the action? Ideally I'd love to be able to walk a lot or take a Jeepney. Having to take trikes a lot or rent a scooter adds up pretty quick.


3000p would be just for a room, not a whole apartment. It depends on location too. If you live in the local area rather than the touristy area, you can get apartments for 5000p. Online sites are a ripoff and cater to stupid foreigners with money to blow. See my other thread in the "Business/Finance" board for an example.
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Re: More info needed

Postby zzzz » Wed Nov 03, 2010 9:48 pm

Winston wrote:3000p would be just for a room, not a whole apartment. It depends on location too. If you live in the local area rather than the touristy area, you can get apartments for 5000p. Online sites are a ripoff and cater to stupid foreigners with money to blow. See my other thread in the "Business/Finance" board for an example.


I'd prefer a larger place, how else can you hold a party? :twisted: The big catch however is I'd really need something furnished. I've found furnished 3BR houses online for as low as 22,000 a month so it does seem like there is hope yet.
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Postby Winston » Sat Feb 12, 2011 7:14 am

One of my expat friends here in the PH wrote me this today:

"Hey Winston -- this is in reply to your text from last night.

I think the reason our perception of these people is sometimes skewed is probably because we're dealing with the lower socioeconomic classes with massive unemployment, little education and "needy" extended families who gravitate to whoever has money. Unfortunately, this is the only group that will deal with us. You'll almost never find a foreigner accepted by middle or high class families here.

As for how to relate to the family, the best way might be to find some common ground like watching sports on tv (like boxing) or singing karaoke. They will also appreciate it if they see you are making an effort to speak their language because frankly (despite popular opinion to the contrary), most people here cannot understand even basic English. What we perceive as arrogance or unfriendly behavior is often just shyness and inability to communicate for fear of embarrassing themselves.

My 2 cents worth."

Makes sense doesn't it?
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Postby Winston » Sat Feb 12, 2011 7:42 am

globetrotter wrote:Why not just cut to the chase and tell them you are a Cheap Charlie?

Or suddenly your mother in the USA needs expensive monthly medical treatments. You just sent her another 200,000 dollars.


I don't like the term "cheap charlie" because it implies that you are skipping out on paying something that you "ought" to pay. Plus that term carries a negative connotation. I prefer to use the term "efficient" or "don't like to waste money" which sounds more logical and to the point. I don't like to call myself "stingy" or "frugal" even. I prefer to just say to them directly "Look. This is the real world. Money is not free. I am not an idiot that you can use. I am too efficient to be taken advantage of. End of story."

No foreigner I know here, including rich ones, likes to feel like they are obligated to be generous and taken advantage of. None of them support their girlfriend/wife's family directly. They usually give allowances to their partner, who in turn give some of it to her family.
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Postby Rock » Sun Feb 13, 2011 8:29 am

Winston wrote:One of my expat friends here in the PH wrote me this today:

"Hey Winston -- this is in reply to your text from last night.

I think the reason our perception of these people is sometimes skewed is probably because we're dealing with the lower socioeconomic classes with massive unemployment, little education and "needy" extended families who gravitate to whoever has money. Unfortunately, this is the only group that will deal with us. You'll almost never find a foreigner accepted by middle or high class families here.


Very unfortunate if true. In many other top Happier Abroad destinations, you have at least a fair to good chance at dating some of the girls from the middle class if you are a presentable type. This applies both to westerners and Asians.

Personally, I think middle class (lower to upper) tends to be the sweet spot. Poor and uneducated girls generally have a lot of issues and are much harder to relate to. IMO, they are on average, less physically attractive too, at least in Asia. Girls who are rich or from influential hi-so families similarly tend to have issues and are often a major pain in the ass with messed-up values (from my perspective).
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Re: Pros and Cons of Living and Dating in the Philippines

Postby ExpeditionSailor » Sun Feb 13, 2011 3:38 pm

Winston wrote:The Pros and Cons of Living and Dating in the Philippines (my perspective)

Here is my list of pros and cons on living and dating in the Philippines. Hope you find it informative. I gotta warn you though, there is no fake political correctness in this list like there is on the Travel Channel and those fake positive hippies who only want to hear cliches. This is telling it like it is, no holds barred, with insight and truthfulness. These are not absolutes, nor do they apply to everyone in every situation. But they are true to such a large degree as to become discernible patterns.

Pros:

- It is a dating paradise for men, especially foreign men. It is easy to get dates or sex anytime you want. No deprivation in this area for men. With most local guys being poor and a large percentage of them being gay or transsexuals, the supply of dateable men is very low. Hence there are always single girls who are looking everywhere you go, a huge surplus of them, never a shortage.


<Balance snipped for brevity's sake>

Winston,

The Philippines seem to offer more con that pro. Apart from it being a 'dating paradise' for men who aren't getting any love in their home countries, why the hell would anyone want to go there? Regular and random power brown-outs would be a big concern for me, since I have a sleep disorder that requires use of a respirator every night, so I would need some form of back-up power. I also find I don't tolerate high heat and humidity well, either. Plus, I don't always suffer fools gladly and would have trouble adapting to a milieu in which stupidity is the norm rather than the exception.

I realize that a woman couldn't provide me with all the intellectual sustenance I would want, but I would do best with someone who is reasonably intelligent. My ex-wife turned out to be a bird-brain, so...

But the irony here is that financially, the Philippines would be ideal for someone as broke-ass as I am, and I'm not a good-looking guy, so I'd probably find myself in heaven getting all kinds of attention from women.
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Re: Pros and Cons of Living and Dating in the Philippines

Postby Mr S » Mon Feb 14, 2011 3:06 am

ExpeditionSailor wrote:
Winston wrote:The Pros and Cons of Living and Dating in the Philippines (my perspective)

Here is my list of pros and cons on living and dating in the Philippines. Hope you find it informative. I gotta warn you though, there is no fake political correctness in this list like there is on the Travel Channel and those fake positive hippies who only want to hear cliches. This is telling it like it is, no holds barred, with insight and truthfulness. These are not absolutes, nor do they apply to everyone in every situation. But they are true to such a large degree as to become discernible patterns.

Pros:

- It is a dating paradise for men, especially foreign men. It is easy to get dates or sex anytime you want. No deprivation in this area for men. With most local guys being poor and a large percentage of them being gay or transsexuals, the supply of dateable men is very low. Hence there are always single girls who are looking everywhere you go, a huge surplus of them, never a shortage.


<Balance snipped for brevity's sake>

Winston,

The Philippines seem to offer more con that pro. Apart from it being a 'dating paradise' for men who aren't getting any love in their home countries, why the hell would anyone want to go there? Regular and random power brown-outs would be a big concern for me, since I have a sleep disorder that requires use of a respirator every night, so I would need some form of back-up power. I also find I don't tolerate high heat and humidity well, either. Plus, I don't always suffer fools gladly and would have trouble adapting to a milieu in which stupidity is the norm rather than the exception.

I realize that a woman couldn't provide me with all the intellectual sustenance I would want, but I would do best with someone who is reasonably intelligent. My ex-wife turned out to be a bird-brain, so...

But the irony here is that financially, the Philippines would be ideal for someone as broke-ass as I am, and I'm not a good-looking guy, so I'd probably find myself in heaven getting all kinds of attention from women.


The women, lower cost of living and the tropical environment are really the only reasons guys come to the Philippines. If the girls weren't as available as they are, there wouldn't be much interest in PI at all with foreign men. And yes stupidity and ignorance are the norm here so that is something you have to just get used to as part of everyday life here. I don't like it, but I deal with it as best I can.
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Postby ladislav » Mon Feb 14, 2011 7:49 am

"Unfortunately, this is the only group that will deal with us. You'll almost never find a foreigner accepted by middle or high class families here".

In the Philippines you can find something not present in other Asian countries- poor educated people ( kind of like me). These are girls who are nurses and teachers and all that. They are not lower class at all. Many girls that I have dated had college degrees. So, yes, I would put them with "middle class" there. I guess you could get into even higher classes if you yourself were a high class person. As a CEO or something. Or if you hung out the right circles.
The not much mingling between real middle class Filipinos and foreigners is also due to the fact that many foreigners are not rich themselves and they themselves do not want to be courting girls in offices- which takes a year or two or proving yourself. They want to be have a lady now and do all kinds of things to her now. They want to drink beer and carouse and have fun with 3-4 ladies at the same time. Now. Not court one to be able to marry her after 2 years.
Some Filipinas were asking online why foreigners always go with ladies of ill repute and do not court ladies the proper Filipino way. Do I need to explain? Few if any guys who go to RP go there to try and integrate and do thing the local way.
When you have 5 poor 19 year olds who want you now and you have one middle class 20 year old who is playing hard to get and who wants you after 2 years of courting, if you were an average Joe, what would you choose?
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Postby Repatriate » Mon Feb 14, 2011 8:55 am

ladislav wrote:"
In the Philippines you can find something not present in other Asian countries- poor educated people ( kind of like me). These are girls who are nurses and teachers and all that.

I guess you could say they are "educated" according to the loosest definition of the word. I find that Filipinos will be reasonably competent in their profession (especially if they work overseas) but when you engage them in a conversation about any kind of meaningful or deep conversation about philosophy, politics, or social issues they aren't all that well rounded. They just aren't very introspective people prone to critical thinking.
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Postby Winston » Mon Feb 14, 2011 10:24 am

Rock wrote:
Winston wrote:One of my expat friends here in the PH wrote me this today:

"Hey Winston -- this is in reply to your text from last night.

I think the reason our perception of these people is sometimes skewed is probably because we're dealing with the lower socioeconomic classes with massive unemployment, little education and "needy" extended families who gravitate to whoever has money. Unfortunately, this is the only group that will deal with us. You'll almost never find a foreigner accepted by middle or high class families here.


Very unfortunate if true. In many other top Happier Abroad destinations, you have at least a fair to good chance at dating some of the girls from the middle class if you are a presentable type. This applies both to westerners and Asians.

Personally, I think middle class (lower to upper) tends to be the sweet spot. Poor and uneducated girls generally have a lot of issues and are much harder to relate to. IMO, they are on average, less physically attractive too, at least in Asia. Girls who are rich or from influential hi-so families similarly tend to have issues and are often a major pain in the ass with messed-up values (from my perspective).


Well keep in mind that this is true mostly in Angeles, where the greedy flock to. Outside of Angeles in the small towns, provinces, and even in Cebu, there are many nice sweet poor girls who will NOT take advantage of you or act greedy/shameless. I've met some of them too. If you come to the PH, I can show you some of them. There are many poor girls who do not do that, and some are not even interested in foreigners too. So not all poor girls are like that.

There are friendly middle class girls that aren't that good looking and more open. You can meet middle class girls but it has to be by breaking into their cliques, working at their company, going to school with them, etc., which are the conservative normal routes.

I get along well in the PH as long as I am nice and kind to everyone, because they will treat me the same way, and thus there is a harmonious vibe here that is not present in the rest of Asia. That's an important thing. Don't forget that.

Once you tune into their frequency, as Ladislav and I have, you will do fine with them. You just gotta learn to "ride their wave".

Btw, it has been pretty cold here in the PH ever since I returned, amazingly. I've never seen it this cool before in the past 3 years. Must be due to either some weird pole shifts in the Earth or to that Global Warming scam. lol
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