Join John Adams, world renowned Intl Matchmaker, Thurs nights 8:30 EST for Live Webcasts with FREE Prizes!
And check out Five Reasons why you should attend a FREE Live AFA Seminar! See locations and details.


Scam free! Check out Christian Filipina - Meet Asian women with Christian values! Members screened.
Exclusive book offer! 75% off! How to Meet, Date and Marry Your Filipina Wife



View Active Topics       Latest 100 Topics       View Your Posts       FAQ Topics       Switch to Mobile


Taiwan is Boring, Repressed, Loveless, etc.

Discuss culture, living, traveling, relocating, dating or anything related to the Asian countries - China, The Philippines, Thailand, etc.

Moderators: jamesbond, fschmidt

Postby Winston » Tue Oct 05, 2010 1:54 pm

To Rock and Repatriate:

Both of you talk about looks, age, clothes, behavior, etc. as being factors in whether you do well in Taiwan socially or not.

But how come both of you won't acknowledge the big factor I keep talking about, that East Asian culture is closed in general and that people are not open and easy to meet, but very shy, reserved and closed toward people outside their clique? The Taiwanese do not deny this if you confront them about it. It's too obvious, which is why they consider America to be more "open and expressive". Remember what this TW girl on Couchsurfing admitted to me?

"hi,winston,
what a long letter! haha
actually, i admit i feel a little offended when i read ur mail first time...(sorry)
but then, i thought u r right. Very Happy
if we compare taiwan with other countries, i know, our people r colder and more shy. it is truth. i think it is because of our culture and traditon. we r not so welcome to strangers, just most people want to protect themselves first.
i totally agree u that people affect each other. so when your surrounding is a close space(people just chat or talk with their friends),u will be a member of them, no doubt.

but i still notice sth different between our sentences,
i think why u feel so disappointed about taiwanese,maybe one reason is just cuz of u r a male. people r usually more freindly to female than to male. Smile
another reason is maybe u go to wrong place, for example,if on the road,maybe most people don't want to talk to u because they r busy or they are teached don't talk to strangers. but if u go to social places, like pubs,concerts,night markets,restaueants,shopping streets, etc. u might find sth a little different.
and i said that people in chiayi r kind and friendly,
i mean people who live in southern part of taiwan r more friendly than northern part of taiwan. Very Happy (every taiwanese knows this.)
ofcourse we can't compare with USA,europe and other western countries i know... but heyhey i am very sure that we r better than china! Very Happy
so how is ur trip in taiwan? maybe u can try other couchsurfers!
enjoy!

Amber"


Most TW people I confront, will tell me the same thing that Amber told me. How do you two explain that?

Any TW person I confront admits the same. They admit that they are CLOSED. So why do you two deny it???

By their own admission they are closed, so what more evidence do you need???

It's as obvious as 2+2=4 yet you two are in denial about it since you do not even acknowledge this reality as a big factor in my "social freeze" in Taiwan. That is not being fair.

Why do you do that? It reminds me of the many intelligent open minded people who will not look at the big unanswered questions re: 9/11 and the many gaping holes and irreconcilable contradictions in it. Even though they are obvious, some people have a psychological block and can't look at it objectively or acknowledge it, and this includes intelligent normally open minded people too.

I swear to God that this factor is REAL and TRUE. I'd bet all my money on it. I would never say that unless it was true.

Yet you two seem to have a psychological block about admitting/acknowledging this.

Why?
Check out the latest posts in our blog The Happier Abroaders.

Don't forget my HA Grand Ebook and Dating Sites!

"It takes far less effort to find and move to the society that has what you want than it does to try to reconstruct an existing society to match your standards." - Harry Browne, How I Found Freedom in an Unfree World
User avatar
Winston
Site Admin
 
Posts: 23612
Joined: Sat Aug 18, 2007 1:16 pm







Postby Winston » Tue Oct 05, 2010 1:57 pm

One more question:

If it's easy and normal to chat up women in TW, how come when you ask any average TW couple,"How did you meet" they always say:

1) through work
2) through school
3) through mutual friends and introductions

But they do not say they met in a casual public place as strangers.

Why?

Remember we are talking MOST IN GENERAL, so please don't twist this into an absolute claim again like politically correct people do.
Last edited by Winston on Tue Oct 05, 2010 2:04 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Check out the latest posts in our blog The Happier Abroaders.

Don't forget my HA Grand Ebook and Dating Sites!

"It takes far less effort to find and move to the society that has what you want than it does to try to reconstruct an existing society to match your standards." - Harry Browne, How I Found Freedom in an Unfree World
User avatar
Winston
Site Admin
 
Posts: 23612
Joined: Sat Aug 18, 2007 1:16 pm

Postby Winston » Tue Oct 05, 2010 2:00 pm

Terrence wrote:I can't speak for Taiwan, as I've never been there, but I'm somewhat surprised at what some say about experiences in Japan and Korea. I've had great experiences in both places and quite the opposite of what others say. I'm told I look young for my age, but women my age, late 30's, and older seem to ignore me completely. It's like I don't even exist. No eye contact or anything. I get the most attention from young girls, like college age and even from high school girls.

I can't say I've been in either place to know about types of girls, like which one's are bad etc. but those considered to be "bad", usually with colored hair, talking loud and with flashy clothes, never talked to me. Those who seem to talk to me are the ones who blend in with everyone else.

I've had girls who barely speak two words of English try to talk to me. If I initiate conversation, they seem surprised, but then really interested. Many times, though, they initiate conversation. I've sat on the bus and had a gorgeous young college girl start chatting to me. I would get the usual "Hi. How are you? Where are you from?" more times than I can count. In places that I frequented regularly, like my gym or the main restaurants I ate at, the girls would open up to me pretty quickly and talk all the time.

Now, would any of this lead to dates and sex? I can't say. I didn't try and I had a wacky girlfriend who probably would have killed me if I did.

Here's an interesting note. My success with Japanese and Korean girls in the Philippines was even better. Maybe it takes a certain type to travel abroad, but my experiences, especially with Korean girls, in the Philippines were such that I thought Korea would be as easy as the Phils. That was not the case, but it is definitely not as bad as what I am reading here.

Of course, we know that hip hop music and black American culture are becoming extremely popular in Japan and Korea now. This may be the reason for my success and why it is with younger people rather than those my age. When I first arrived, I did have my dreads, but I eventually cut them off, and things surprisingly got even better. I do believe in vibes and some of that stuff as well, though I don't claim to understand any of it.

I don't necessarily believe in past lives and such, but some people, like my trainer, my Korean girlfriend, some of her friends and family, I clicked with so well it was like we have known each other forever. I felt at home.

I will be trying out Shanghai China next, so maybe I will have some different experiences to report there too.

@Winston
I agree with what some others have stated. You're swimming up stream. Your experiences should make you appreciate the Philippines all the more. Turn around, find the flow.


So Terrence, you've NEVER been in a public place in Asia where no one made eye contact with you and everyone ignored you and treated you were invisible?

You've never felt the wall/bubble around Korean/Japanese girls that the rest of us sense strongly? It is there and it exists without a doubt. But you never felt it? Ever?
Check out the latest posts in our blog The Happier Abroaders.

Don't forget my HA Grand Ebook and Dating Sites!

"It takes far less effort to find and move to the society that has what you want than it does to try to reconstruct an existing society to match your standards." - Harry Browne, How I Found Freedom in an Unfree World
User avatar
Winston
Site Admin
 
Posts: 23612
Joined: Sat Aug 18, 2007 1:16 pm

Postby Winston » Tue Oct 05, 2010 2:01 pm

You all talk about age as a factor. Age was even a big factor mentioned in Steve Hoca's interview with Larry Elterman and Mark Davis too.

However, that seems like a copout to me, and my friend Jeff agreed, after I talked to him about it the other night.

Age does not change whether girls are more open or approachable or not. When I was 17, people in TW did not make eye contact with me or were more open simply cause I was younger. When I was 21 - 23 years old, I spent two years approaching girls in my college at Cal State Hayward. Everyday after class I would spend two hours hoping to randomly meet a wonderful girl that would date me, since the TV/Movies I saw told me it was VERY easy and could happen any time. So I believed the media and culture that told me that meeting girls was easy. And everyday after class, I would spend two hours looking to meet girls on campus but getting nowhere. It was good exercise cause I walked a lot around the whole campus. But I didn't get shit. Everyone just wanted to go to classes and then leave. They MINDED THEIR OWN BUSINESS and expected me to do the same.

How was age a factor in that? IT WASN'T. It's a BS copout excuse. Unapproachable women are unapproachable regardless of your age.
Check out the latest posts in our blog The Happier Abroaders.

Don't forget my HA Grand Ebook and Dating Sites!

"It takes far less effort to find and move to the society that has what you want than it does to try to reconstruct an existing society to match your standards." - Harry Browne, How I Found Freedom in an Unfree World
User avatar
Winston
Site Admin
 
Posts: 23612
Joined: Sat Aug 18, 2007 1:16 pm

Postby Winston » Tue Oct 05, 2010 2:03 pm

I talked to Jeff (WorldTraveler on this forum) the other night by phone, and he saw this thread and said that all you guys were just all talk and no action, which is typical. He told me that he would believe me any day, cause I am one of two guys he knows that tells the truth the way it is, and that other guys, including intelligent down to earth guys that he knows, often BS and are in denial. He has known me for years and said that I've earned this reputation with him since 2003.

Essentially he said that if people claim the opposite and can't show or prove it, then you should not believe them. And he has a valid point.

I think he is right in that if something were really true and obvious, it could be shown and demonstrated. For example, I can and have demonstrated to others that women in Russia and the Philippines are very open and approachable and very easy to meet. I have proven that firsthand to others, not only in videos.

But for some reason, NO ONE who claims Taiwan is open and sociable and a dating paradise where chicks are easy to meet, has been able to demonstrate this or show this. When asked, they ALWAYS make up excuses. Even when I offer them cash, they won't.

That's a big red flag right there. And Jeff is right that we have a right not to buy such claims because if they were true, they could be shown without excuses.

This reminds me of going to an Amway/MLM meeting. There, EVERYONE claims to be doing well and making a lot of money. But when you ask people to show you their tax forms showing how much money they made from Amway, they start making excuses. Only the people at the top of the pyramid getting rich off the scheme will show their tax forms. But everyone below the top will make excuses.

So should we believe everyone there at that Amway meeting, even if they ALL claim "I am honest and would never lie to you"?

But EVERYONE CLAIMS to be honest and would not lie, so does that mean that there are no liars, dishonest people and BSers in the whole world?! LOL

Come on. Think about it. Anyone and everyone SAYS they tell the truth and are honest. But only a few can DEMONSTRATE and PROVE their claims. WHY?! What does that tell you?

In fact, I'll bet money that if Repatriate flew into Taipei right now, and I emailed him and said "Ok let's meet. Please show me your claim that most people, or even a large percentage, of young people in Taiwan are open, sociable and easy to meet, contrary to my claims" he would cop out with EXCUSES.

Repatriate knows it too.

In any case, why can't everyone be honest and prove everything they say like me?

Why am I the only true person that demonstrates everything I claim firsthand to anybody?

Rock, when you say that "Taiwan is a dating paradise for the right people" that is vague and cryptic. That's like saying that "Amway is a good business opportunity for some people." It doesn't define whether it's a good opportunity in general or not (and by all honest accounts, it is NOT). Just because some people get rich in Amway does not make it a good business opportunity in general for most people. I still have not seen any proof that Taiwan is an "open friendly easy to meet girls type of culture" in GENERAL other than in words.

If something is real, it can be demonstrated without excuses. Otherwise, red flag.

As Billy Joel said, "Honesty is such a lonely word. Everyone is so untrue..."
Check out the latest posts in our blog The Happier Abroaders.

Don't forget my HA Grand Ebook and Dating Sites!

"It takes far less effort to find and move to the society that has what you want than it does to try to reconstruct an existing society to match your standards." - Harry Browne, How I Found Freedom in an Unfree World
User avatar
Winston
Site Admin
 
Posts: 23612
Joined: Sat Aug 18, 2007 1:16 pm

Postby Winston » Tue Oct 05, 2010 2:07 pm

Rock wrote:I never compared Taiwanese women to Russians. I contrasted perceptions of different people about a given place. For example, your perception about Taiwan is very different from mine.

The portion of Lads post about Russia I was referring to reads as follows:

"Another thing about Russian daily life - they do not really enjoy it. They get awakened not to enjoy a new day but to cope with today's problems. There is little comfort and contentment. Russians are used to minor everyday difficulties, and they don't even bother them anymore. Russian daily life is tough, and it's probably the reason why they smile so seldom. Rarely you will see a smiling face in a bus or on the streets - the fact that usually makes foreigners wonder."


But when you saw the girls I met in Moscow and how approachable they were, you said "They are like that in Taiwan too" insinuating that girls in TW are just as approachable as in Russia.

I am 100 percent sure you said this. The memory is crystal clear. Do you seriously believe that?

I can also tell you from pure memory alone that "The Karate Kid" film came out in 1984. You can verify that if you like.
Check out the latest posts in our blog The Happier Abroaders.

Don't forget my HA Grand Ebook and Dating Sites!

"It takes far less effort to find and move to the society that has what you want than it does to try to reconstruct an existing society to match your standards." - Harry Browne, How I Found Freedom in an Unfree World
User avatar
Winston
Site Admin
 
Posts: 23612
Joined: Sat Aug 18, 2007 1:16 pm

Postby Repatriate » Tue Oct 05, 2010 2:13 pm

Winston wrote:Repatriate, question for you:

ABC's in America spend their lives trying to become more "Americanized", so they view going to Taiwan as a sort of regression or devolution, a step backwards. Thus, most ABC's don't visit Taiwan often, and if they do, it's just for short trips and family reunions.

Not really it's a mixed bag like any group of people. Most who were born and raised in America are Americanized to some degree but that doesn't mean they lose their ethnic identity and I know plenty of ABCs who speak mandarin and are well traveled to boot.
But you said you know some that went back to Taiwan and fit into hip groups and did well with ladies. Well, if they go back to Taiwan to live for an extended time, then logically they must not be that "Americanized". Probably they have a "Chinese soul" like tennis player Michael Chang and Travel Channel's Janet Hsieh, both ABC's, claim they do.

We've kind of been over this before but i'll throw up a few biographical profiles for you to mull over. There was a common denominator in why these two particular guys I knew were so successful with the ladies in that they were stylish and very witty conversationalists as well. Their personal interests were all over and one of them was really into professional shooting and the other was a big fan of film.

1) First guy I know went on loveboat for his first TW experience and then decided to take a second trip for a couple months just to bum around at his relative's condo. He's a smart guy, dresses well, and was pretty active in the club & nightlife scene. He met a lot of people just hanging out at these places with a wing man and networked his way up to a lot of very pretty girls.

2) Second guy went to work in TW and is older (in his 30's) but has similar traits as the first guy..dresses well, good talker with women. He met a few women through co-workers and then kind of went from there. I think he also did some internet match.com stuff as well. Last time I talked with him he had a very active social group which traveled together with quite a few cute women around.


None of these guys had any gimmicks..they just worked up their social network from day to day contacts and typical social scene stuff. They also didn't do the creepy expat thing and proposition hundreds of random girls on the subway or anything either.
So, not all ABC's are bananas. Some have Chinese souls or feel they are more Chinese than American. So your examples are likely to be one of these. And I still doubt whether any "banana" really fits in or feels comfortable in Taiwan.

You still haven't really explained to me what this means anyways. How do you determine whether a person has a Chinese soul or not? You accused me of being conformist and admiring cliques when that's not even close to how it is. Matter of fact out of the 3-4 ABCs on this site (theKingdom is too I think) most of us seem to have extremely varied interests.
Repatriate
Veteran Poster
 
Posts: 2533
Joined: Sun Jun 15, 2008 6:39 pm

Postby Winston » Tue Oct 05, 2010 2:17 pm

Repatriate wrote:Winston it makes no sense to set yourself up in a lot of fake instant relationships because people are pretending to tolerate you for ulterior motives. It seems to me that you complain about people not acting genuine but crave superficial attention that may in fact be built on phoniness that even you may not understand. :lol: After all Winston didn't a few attractive Russian women just use you as a ticket to carnivals and such before bouncing off with their meathead boyfriends?

I personally feel that finding substantial friendships is like finding the right woman. It's all just a numbers game. There are a lot of people who most people aren't really compatible with over a period longer than a few days. It's up to you to filter it down to the interior close relationships and the exterior "orbit" of people who you are friends with to go have a coffee or to get to know other people.

Also, being a positive person helps as well. If you are grumpy about the people around you it gives off a vibe that's negative. I have noticed that people in asian cultures tend to key off this vibe really well at times. They tend to avoid you.

Another thing..have you thought about taking up hobbies that will lead you to meet more relaxed and interesting people? Learn to play the guitar or something. Take up kickboxing class. That pays a lot more personal development dividends than debating psychics and aliens. :lol:


Take classes? That sounds like cliched American advice that we all disproved here long ago.

I would not be able to understand any classes in Chinese :) In the Philippines I might though if they are in English.

But you should not do something like that unless your heart is it in. That's like trying to go to yoga class, cooking class, swing dance class, or church just to meet people.

I am a positive person in positive environments and situations. I am sensitive to energy and pick up on them. If I act negative, it would not be for no reason. Yes I am be moody sometimes, but usually not.

You are oversimplifying things, and showing no more depth than shallow American women are about this.
Check out the latest posts in our blog The Happier Abroaders.

Don't forget my HA Grand Ebook and Dating Sites!

"It takes far less effort to find and move to the society that has what you want than it does to try to reconstruct an existing society to match your standards." - Harry Browne, How I Found Freedom in an Unfree World
User avatar
Winston
Site Admin
 
Posts: 23612
Joined: Sat Aug 18, 2007 1:16 pm

Postby Winston » Tue Oct 05, 2010 2:22 pm

Rock wrote:Everyone's 'reality' is different. You have a subjective tendency to project your own unique personal experience onto others and use it to formulate broad generalizations which you think is 'reality' for all people.

Girls don't smile at you or talk to you in Taiwan. You can't get dates or even make friends with them. Is that your so-called proof???
Some others say the similar things and agree with your views? So what. As long as a percentage, actually a significant one, succeed socially and dating wise, then what you say does not apply to all.

You know next to nothing about Taiwan and/or China's pop-culture, current events, politics, history, etc. Your extended family circle sounds very narrow and anyway, they don't give a shit about you, right? You don't have many if any friends, local or expat. You stay in an isolated subdivision way out of a small city. You don't drive and rely on your parents for all your transportation, just like a kid before he gets his drivers license. You have no Chinese reading skills which would enable you to explore social sites and information sources popular with young locals. The total composite of your experience in and exposure to Taiwan is very limited. Do you really imagine that you know what's going on outside of your little bubble?

Taiwan, like most countries, has many sub-cultures which you probably have no awareness of.
As the capital, Taipei in many ways provides access to the most diversity. There are many thriving scenes - casual straight sex, hanging-out with students, hiking, bicycling, gay clubs for males or females, gyms, language/cultural exchange, foreign bars and clubs, drugs, music and bands, etc. etc. You may complain that no one takes you in or shows you these worlds. Well, you gotta put in your own work so that you got something to bring to the table. Taiwan ain't no social charity. Which country is?

And if you want visual proof of a foreigner staying in Taiwan for just a few months, hanging out with lots of attractive to hot young girls and being part of desirable social circles, I've got it (a few Gigs worth) and I'm happy to show it to you next time I see you. In Taipei, I can also take you to some of those clubs where you can observe the action. There are always some foreigners and ABCs to watch. I'm due back this coming Monday and it sounds like you are still in Chiayi so stop whining and make plans to get your ass up to Taipei.


But if TW admit that their culture is closed, as Amber did above, and any TW person you confront, then why do YOU deny it?

Why don't you admit it as a factor? Why the denial?

A truth seeker doesn't do that.

Ok let's meet then so you can show me all that. When? Give me a day.

Even Ladislav told me that if you compare Japan to Seattle, Seattle seems like a wild party. I understand what he meant now. But why do YOU deny such obvious things?

Any honest Japanese person would not. So why do you?

Btw, you may know about TW pop culture than me, but I know more about the psychology and culture of the people. Many say my TW observations are very accurate and insightful. You may know shallow aspects, but I know deeper. I know the TW mind, mentality, upbringing, etc. I've been exposed to TW culture my whole life.

You only see what TW people show to white people which is mostly fake politeness. They don't show you their grim selves.
Last edited by Winston on Tue Oct 05, 2010 2:30 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Check out the latest posts in our blog The Happier Abroaders.

Don't forget my HA Grand Ebook and Dating Sites!

"It takes far less effort to find and move to the society that has what you want than it does to try to reconstruct an existing society to match your standards." - Harry Browne, How I Found Freedom in an Unfree World
User avatar
Winston
Site Admin
 
Posts: 23612
Joined: Sat Aug 18, 2007 1:16 pm

Postby Repatriate » Tue Oct 05, 2010 2:24 pm

Winston wrote:In fact, I'll bet money that if Repatriate flew into Taipei right now, and I emailed him and said "Ok let's meet. Please show me your claim that most people, or even a large percentage, of young people in Taiwan are open, sociable and easy to meet, contrary to my claims" he would cop out with EXCUSES.

Repatriate knows it too.

Oh here we go.. you come up with some silly hypothetical and then knock it down.
In any case, why can't everyone be honest and prove everything they say like me?

Actually there's very little that you've ever proved to anyone Winston. You throw out some qualitative measurements of your own perceived intelligence or abilities and offer it up as an absolute statement. When other people question it you flame out in the most hilarious ways. Look, I don't have any animosity towards you and I actually enjoy reading the posts on this site but I do think you often use hypocritical and rather egocentric exceptions to try and make your points stick.
Repatriate
Veteran Poster
 
Posts: 2533
Joined: Sun Jun 15, 2008 6:39 pm

Postby Winston » Tue Oct 05, 2010 2:28 pm

Repatriate wrote:
Winston wrote:Repatriate, question for you:

ABC's in America spend their lives trying to become more "Americanized", so they view going to Taiwan as a sort of regression or devolution, a step backwards. Thus, most ABC's don't visit Taiwan often, and if they do, it's just for short trips and family reunions.

Not really it's a mixed bag like any group of people. Most who were born and raised in America are Americanized to some degree but that doesn't mean they lose their ethnic identity and I know plenty of ABCs who speak mandarin and are well traveled to boot.
But you said you know some that went back to Taiwan and fit into hip groups and did well with ladies. Well, if they go back to Taiwan to live for an extended time, then logically they must not be that "Americanized". Probably they have a "Chinese soul" like tennis player Michael Chang and Travel Channel's Janet Hsieh, both ABC's, claim they do.

We've kind of been over this before but i'll throw up a few biographical profiles for you to mull over. There was a common denominator in why these two particular guys I knew were so successful with the ladies in that they were stylish and very witty conversationalists as well. Their personal interests were all over and one of them was really into professional shooting and the other was a big fan of film.

1) First guy I know went on loveboat for his first TW experience and then decided to take a second trip for a couple months just to bum around at his relative's condo. He's a smart guy, dresses well, and was pretty active in the club & nightlife scene. He met a lot of people just hanging out at these places with a wing man and networked his way up to a lot of very pretty girls.

2) Second guy went to work in TW and is older (in his 30's) but has similar traits as the first guy..dresses well, good talker with women. He met a few women through co-workers and then kind of went from there. I think he also did some internet match.com stuff as well. Last time I talked with him he had a very active social group which traveled together with quite a few cute women around.


None of these guys had any gimmicks..they just worked up their social network from day to day contacts and typical social scene stuff. They also didn't do the creepy expat thing and proposition hundreds of random girls on the subway or anything either.
So, not all ABC's are bananas. Some have Chinese souls or feel they are more Chinese than American. So your examples are likely to be one of these. And I still doubt whether any "banana" really fits in or feels comfortable in Taiwan.

You still haven't really explained to me what this means anyways. How do you determine whether a person has a Chinese soul or not? You accused me of being conformist and admiring cliques when that's not even close to how it is. Matter of fact out of the 3-4 ABCs on this site (theKingdom is too I think) most of us seem to have extremely varied interests.


I have good social skills, conversation skills, and a variety of interests. You can find many interests of mine in my biography. And yes they go beyond psychics and aliens. You falsely labeled me.

But you gotta understand that communication is a two way street. You do your part, but if the other side won't meet you halfway, it doesn't matter how good your social skills are.

Get it?

It's a TWO WAY street.

I can hold good conversations with anyone who is open and friendly. I have done so many times in the past.

So what is the problem then?

What about what Amber said above, which reflects what most TW will admit? Do you not admit there is a lot of truth in it?

By Chinese soul, I mean that they feel that they are Chinese on the inside and outside. A person with a Chinese soul knows it and says they do, just as Michael Chang did. It's just something you know, like awareness.

Why is such a simple concept over your head?
Check out the latest posts in our blog The Happier Abroaders.

Don't forget my HA Grand Ebook and Dating Sites!

"It takes far less effort to find and move to the society that has what you want than it does to try to reconstruct an existing society to match your standards." - Harry Browne, How I Found Freedom in an Unfree World
User avatar
Winston
Site Admin
 
Posts: 23612
Joined: Sat Aug 18, 2007 1:16 pm

Postby Rock » Tue Oct 05, 2010 2:31 pm

Winston wrote:To Rock and Repatriate:

Both of you talk about looks, age, clothes, behavior, etc. as being factors in whether you do well in Taiwan socially or not.

But how come both of you won't acknowledge the big factor I keep talking about, that East Asian culture is closed in general and that people are not open and easy to meet, but very shy, reserved and closed toward people outside their clique? The Taiwanese do not deny this if you confront them about it. It's too obvious, which is why they consider America to be more "open and expressive". Remember what this TW girl on Couchsurfing admitted to me?

"hi,winston,
what a long letter! haha
actually, i admit i feel a little offended when i read ur mail first time...(sorry)
but then, i thought u r right. Very Happy
if we compare taiwan with other countries, i know, our people r colder and more shy. it is truth. i think it is because of our culture and traditon. we r not so welcome to strangers, just most people want to protect themselves first.
i totally agree u that people affect each other. so when your surrounding is a close space(people just chat or talk with their friends),u will be a member of them, no doubt.

but i still notice sth different between our sentences,
i think why u feel so disappointed about taiwanese,maybe one reason is just cuz of u r a male. people r usually more freindly to female than to male. Smile
another reason is maybe u go to wrong place, for example,if on the road,maybe most people don't want to talk to u because they r busy or they are teached don't talk to strangers. but if u go to social places, like pubs,concerts,night markets,restaueants,shopping streets, etc. u might find sth a little different.
and i said that people in chiayi r kind and friendly,
i mean people who live in southern part of taiwan r more friendly than northern part of taiwan. Very Happy (every taiwanese knows this.)
ofcourse we can't compare with USA,europe and other western countries i know... but heyhey i am very sure that we r better than china! Very Happy
so how is ur trip in taiwan? maybe u can try other couchsurfers!
enjoy!

Amber"


Most TW people I confront, will tell me the same thing that Amber told me. How do you two explain that?

Any TW person I confront admits the same. They admit that they are CLOSED. So why do you two deny it???

By their own admission they are closed, so what more evidence do you need???

It's as obvious as 2+2=4 yet you two are in denial about it since you do not even acknowledge this reality as a big factor in my "social freeze" in Taiwan. That is not being fair.

Why do you do that? It reminds me of the many intelligent open minded people who will not look at the big unanswered questions re: 9/11 and the many gaping holes and irreconcilable contradictions in it. Even though they are obvious, some people have a psychological block and can't look at it objectively or acknowledge it, and this includes intelligent normally open minded people too.

I swear to God that this factor is REAL and TRUE. I'd bet all my money on it. I would never say that unless it was true.

Yet you two seem to have a psychological block about admitting/acknowledging this.

Why?


Perhaps Taiwan is a very closed place for some, maybe even most, but not all, at least as far as casual dating goes. I can promise you that. My former French tenant and his foreign classmate buddies from Zhen Da either pulled scores of young attractive girls during there semester here or settled with a local girlfriend. Some did both. I have a lot of photos from him which I can show you when we meet. What did these guys have in common? They were young, average to very good looking, and white (or in 1 case black).

When I interviewed my tenant, a very laid back and soft spoken type (not at all a braggart), he claimed that of all the countries he's stayed for extended periods (France, UK, US, Brazil, Thailand, Hong Kong, Taiwan and a couple others I think) Taiwan was by far the easiest place for him to pull girls in. Whenever he put the cologne on, I knew that he was going out to the clubs and that many hours later, he would be bringing someone back. He usually did.

Many of the local girls at his uni were keen on dating him or the other exchange students too. I personally saw this play out.

According to him, girls in France (Marseilles and esp. Paris) are very complicated, and in his case, often played games over weeks that lead to nothing more than cock-teasing. He ended up with one girl friend for a few years and never got to date much outside of that relationship.

Even Brazil was a lot tougher for him, especially Rio. With his brother's help for translation (his bro is a corporate sponsored Rio expat), he only managed to score in the north part of the country. In Rio, he got nothing more than Salsa dancing in Lapa.

So, looks, age, height, race, etc. probably do affect a guy's experience in Taipei to some extent. If not, how do you explain the huge differences in experiences here by different guys?
Rock
Elite Upper Class Poster
 
Posts: 4123
Joined: Wed Apr 21, 2010 4:16 pm

Postby Winston » Tue Oct 05, 2010 2:34 pm

Repatriate wrote:
Winston wrote:In fact, I'll bet money that if Repatriate flew into Taipei right now, and I emailed him and said "Ok let's meet. Please show me your claim that most people, or even a large percentage, of young people in Taiwan are open, sociable and easy to meet, contrary to my claims" he would cop out with EXCUSES.

Repatriate knows it too.

Oh here we go.. you come up with some silly hypothetical and then knock it down.
In any case, why can't everyone be honest and prove everything they say like me?

Actually there's very little that you've ever proved to anyone Winston. You throw out some qualitative measurements of your own perceived intelligence or abilities and offer it up as an absolute statement. When other people question it you flame out in the most hilarious ways. Look, I don't have any animosity towards you and I actually enjoy reading the posts on this site but I do think you often use hypocritical and rather egocentric exceptions to try and make your points stick.


WTF? I haven't proven anything? Are you out of your f***ing mind?

I've put up 7 videos so far and a huge photo collage and 9 photojournals that prove all my claims. You haven't proven shit! My God. How can you f***ing say that? God you are a f***ing idiot. I SWEAR!

Look what people say about my proof:

http://www.happierabroad.com/Photojourn ... ponses.htm

Btw, there is no proof that California exists either. I'm going down to your imbecile level.
Check out the latest posts in our blog The Happier Abroaders.

Don't forget my HA Grand Ebook and Dating Sites!

"It takes far less effort to find and move to the society that has what you want than it does to try to reconstruct an existing society to match your standards." - Harry Browne, How I Found Freedom in an Unfree World
User avatar
Winston
Site Admin
 
Posts: 23612
Joined: Sat Aug 18, 2007 1:16 pm

Postby Repatriate » Tue Oct 05, 2010 2:43 pm

Winston wrote:
I've put up 7 videos so far and a huge photo collage and 9 photojournals that prove all my claims. You haven't proven shit! My God. How can you f***ing say that? God you are a f***ing idiot. I SWEAR!

Ah yes the legendary photo collage the ones where you go into the go gos in the Phillipines and snap off dozens of shots..or the ones in Russia where you pulled girls off to the side and took pics with them? So what. I'm familiar with your backstory about those trips and what happened in Russia at least. You got bounced around and scammed from one slapper to the next. That's not impressive Winston that's just kind of sad.

I'm talking about meeting normal girls, having a regular social life, and getting them in the sack. Not entertaining scam princesses and getting involved in marriage agencies.
Repatriate
Veteran Poster
 
Posts: 2533
Joined: Sun Jun 15, 2008 6:39 pm

Postby Winston » Tue Oct 05, 2010 2:56 pm

Rock wrote:
Winston wrote:Perhaps Taiwan is a very closed place for some, maybe even most, but not all, at least as far as casual dating goes. I can promise you that. My former French tenant and his foreign classmate buddies from Zhen Da either pulled scores of young attractive girls during there semester here or settled with a local girlfriend. Some did both. I have a lot of photos from him which I can show you when we meet. What did these guys have in common? They were young, average to very good looking, and white (or in 1 case black).

When I interviewed my tenant, a very laid back and soft spoken type (not at all a braggart), he claimed that of all the countries he's stayed for extended periods (France, UK, US, Brazil, Thailand, Hong Kong, Taiwan and a couple others I think) Taiwan was by far the easiest place for him to pull girls in. Whenever he put the cologne on, I knew that he was going out to the clubs and that many hours later, he would be bringing someone back. He usually did.

Many of the local girls at his uni were keen on dating him or the other exchange students too. I personally saw this play out.

According to him, girls in France (Marseilles and esp. Paris) are very complicated, and in his case, often played games over weeks that lead to nothing more than cock-teasing. He ended up with one girl friend for a few years and never got to date much outside of that relationship.

Even Brazil was a lot tougher for him, especially Rio. With his brother's help for translation (his bro is a corporate sponsored Rio expat), he only managed to score in the north part of the country. In Rio, he got nothing more than Salsa dancing in Lapa.

So, looks, age, height, race, etc. probably do affect a guy's experience in Taipei to some extent. If not, how do you explain the huge differences in experiences here by different guys?


But I'm not talking about FOR some people. I'm talking about CLOSED CULTURALLY SPEAKING IN GENERAL. Even if you were invisible, not handsome or ugly, you can still notice a lot of things about people just from watching them over time. And some things will be obvious, such as how approachable people are, while others not obvious yet.

In person you can pick up a lot of vibes easily too.

I have no explanation for your examples. All I know is what I see. And you were wrong that I am basing my observations off stereotypes. I base my observations on DIRECT EXPERIENCE and insight, not stereotypes.

I am surprised you don't know me better than that.

Thus, when we meet and you show me how open TW youngsters are, I will observe and draw OBJECTIVE observations.

That's all I can do.

But I can promise to be open, fun and sociable, which is my natural self.

But as I said, it's a two way street. If the other side doesn't reciprocate, there's not much we can do.

The patterns are real and exist. Even Momopi, an expert in Asian culture, admitted in this thread that TW are wary of strangers. He also told me that TW people prefer to have conversations about practical things, not abstract things. That is not stereotyping. That is a general pattern about them that one can easily conclude upon experience.

You wouldn't dispute that right?

Again, it IS part of the inherent culture in East Asia (oriental cultures) to be closed in demeanor. That is common knowledge. So why do you deny it? Isn't that strange? Other people who are honest do not dispute this. So why do you?

Patterns exist. Cultural differences exist. That is a fact. And most people conform to their culture, not defy it. Thus, most people will act in accordance WITH their culture, not against it. Agreed?
Check out the latest posts in our blog The Happier Abroaders.

Don't forget my HA Grand Ebook and Dating Sites!

"It takes far less effort to find and move to the society that has what you want than it does to try to reconstruct an existing society to match your standards." - Harry Browne, How I Found Freedom in an Unfree World
User avatar
Winston
Site Admin
 
Posts: 23612
Joined: Sat Aug 18, 2007 1:16 pm

PreviousNext

Return to Asia, China, Philippines, Thailand

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest