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Discuss culture, living, traveling, relocating, dating or anything related to the Asian countries - China, The Philippines, Thailand, etc.
When I was in 9th grade I went to a 7th-Day Adventist school in Tacoma Park, Maryland which had a large Indian population. I was amazed at how pretty so many of these Americanized Indian girls were. Later, as an adult, I noticed the many beautiful women in India's Bollywood movies.
So now I have to wonder, on the subject of being Happier Abroad, what about India???
It has over a billion people (second only to China) and is mostly very poor.
So why do we not hear much about it as a romantic resource for western men?
Anyone have any experience there?
Forget it! I don't think its an easy place to find GFs or lovers due to the cultures you are likely to encounter. Moreover, its disgustingly filthy and crowded in many parts and you will be harassed by aggressive beggars. There is some moderately priced P4P in biggest cities though if that's what you're after. Of the approximately 200 countries out there, it definitely would not make my target list for dating and romance.
I have been there.
Indians are very conservative and do not like to marry people of other nationalities or casts. Also, it is ageist.
And at any time on the streets of India it is mostly men walking. In other words, it is a country of an endless sausage fest.
Some guys have been lucky but as a rule, a Western man and an Indian girl is not a known combination.
Even Indian American girls rarely if ever like people of another race/ethnicity.
It would be easier to marry an Arab woman than an Indian one.
Just forget it!
A brain is a terrible thing to wash!
Yes, India is certainly not a good place to go for dating and romance. But there are other things that might draw you to India.
India is the only truly feminine country in the world and the archetype most revered in India is that of the mother. If you visit India you will see some astonishing sights. Next door to the five star house might be the camp of a nomadic tribe. Nomadic people with horses co-exist side by side with people in modern, fancy cars. No one has tried to convert the old tribes who live as they have lived for thousands of years.
This is a tolerance you will not find anywhere else in the world. It is the acceptance only a mother can provide.
Perhaps India will call you when you are ready for her. If you are currently focussed on efficiency, cleanliness and convenience then it is not the correct time. If you are looking for dating and romance, that's not it either.
If you are tired of isolation, if you are tired of horndogging too, if you want a relief from your own judgements, if you are feeling utterly baffled as to the meaning of it all, if you need to find a place of rest, of acceptance, if your thoughts have turned other-worldly then India might be the right place for you.
With the usual caveats you will meet some of the gentlest, warmest people you will ever encounter, who even while having next to nothing will have some hospitality for you. You will also encounter a whirling kalidoscope of colors, smells and flavors that will baffle, shock, disgust and delight your senses. And if you have done your homework and are tuned in well, you will begin to feel a deep rest, an acceptance and naturalness, similar perhaps to what a child would feel in the arms of the mother.
If not India itself then at least Hindu philosophical thought would be of value to you at such a time.
So I guess India is good for a cultural experience, and maybe a spiritual one too. But Mr S didn't find it that spiritual there.
The guys there tend to be very philosophical though. And the food must be great too.
Mark Twain loved it there, so there must have been something interesting and enlightening or amusing about it.
I guess we could say that India proves that not all poor foreign women are friendly just cause they are poor, so it isn't all about the money.
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"It takes far less effort to find and move to the society that has what you want than it does to try to reconstruct an existing society to match your standards." - Harry Browne
China is like India in this regard.
They are poor - $3,500 USD GDP per cap, 6,500 PPP - yet they don't fall over foreign men.
They want a Chinese guy or a Long Term transplant from elsewhere. A bit Ageist, too. But almost ALL nations are. The exceptions are the rare nation.
They also know that in 5+ years that they will be developed and there will be well off men to date.
globetrotter: when you say this "A bit Ageist, too. But almost ALL nations are. The exceptions are the rare nation." what nations arn't ageist?
And what do you mean in 5 years they will be developed maybe the cities on the coasts what about the rest of China? If Chinese don't like foreigners how do you manage?
Part of acceptance for a man, as needed as water or air, is women. Ladies, love, kids, dating, romance. Acceptance is incomplete without those. Now, if in India they do not like dating/loving/marrying men of other races/countries, the acceptance is not complete. There will always be that thing gnawing at you.
Acceptance is in the Philippines, most Latin American countries and other such places.
I like ashrams and the food in India, but there is time to go home.
Also, it does not have an easy visa regime. You want a place where it is easy to get in and you do not need a visa. Indian visas are a pain.
A brain is a terrible thing to wash!
China has an enormous population. In major cities foreigners can find their niche it's just not like the Phillipines or even Thailand where most of the rural and some urban women are constantly on the game for foreigners. There are those types too though in China and i'd say more than enough for long term expats who want to date locally.
I'd say the major cities like Shanghai, Chonqqing and Beijing and some of the "smaller" outlier ones like Xian are already considered developed. The GDP per capita and infrastructure in those cities are pretty high and probably comparable to even major midwestern cities in the U.S. Actually, Shanghai is easily up there with NY when it comes to importance these days.
China is so huge that there will definitely be a major class divide however it's not a small country either. If you think about it various provinces are almost like miniature countries even with their own specific ethnic minorities in some cases. It's a far different social fabric than what the U.S. has.
You do have to be ready for it and tuned in. For example, if you saw a horse caravan of nomadic people pass by a modern hotel you could get confused and frightened as to who these people are, be baffled by the colors and smells, rush back into your hotel room and send out a furious missive to your friends back home about how horrible the place is and how there seems to be these odd people wandering around and how confused you are etc.
Or you could see the caravan and know that these are people living as they have lived for thousands of years. You can marvel in the fact that they co exist side by side with the hotel and nobody is trying to convert anyone. The hotel doorman doesn't seem to be bothered by them, they don't seem to be too bothered by the hotel doorman. Niether is the traffic cop, the street venders or any other passerbys. Everyone does seem to be on some level living their own natural lives and letting others do the same.
So then perhaps you might find yourself dropping some of your judgements too. And finding yourself acting more naturally too. But you don't have to go to India to do this.
There is acceptance as being accepted by others, as in other people accepting you. This is not the acceptance I am talking about. This acceptance enough people in India will tell you they have trouble finding. Even within the traditional marriage framework in India, with its strong sense of community people will report the same. They didn't feel love from their husband/wife, their in laws were jerks, the family was mean and didnt care during time of crises etc, the community expected too much of them, they didn't get to do all the things they wanted etc.
Most people around the world will report the same thing, how they have trouble maintaining love, all the problems they have with the people they consider their own, how they often act selfish, unresponsive etc.
This is certainly not to be negative or personal in any way, but if it was that easy say in the Philippines or Latin American countries you would be posting about how wonderful your philippina bride has been for how many ever years now and how wonderful the kids are, wouldn't you, as would everyone else?
The other kind of acceptance is the acceptance of the nature of life itself, that we will never ever get completely 'what we want', that life eats life, we get old and die, many of our wishes and needs will not be fulfilled, love if we feel it may never be requited, that we are limited by our natures etc.
Everyone still keeps their hopes and fears with them, but tasting this acceptance even for a short while can be enormously useful, freeing you of the burden of finding that point from whence everything will be 'happily ever after', of the burden of requiring everything to always be 'awesome!'.
It doesn't mean you give up and don't try. But it can oddly enough make you more accepting of others, of the limitations and weaknesses that they too have.
I wonder though, those who are on this forum, what is it you are looking for? But that should be a different topic.
There is no way to explain this in a short post. Books have been written on the Chinese.
I will try.
Most of the warm water SE Asian nations are not ageist. The more money in a country, the more ageist, the less Spanish influence, the more ageist.
I am talking about those smaller cities referred to as Tier 3 and Tier 4. Places you have never heard of in locations you could not find on a map. The growth in these - growth I have seen with my own eyes - in just one year, is astonishing. They are literally moving from 1849 to 2011 in a matter of 3 years. In 6 months an ancient neighborhood is bulldozed, razed and in its place are modern 32 storey hi-rises as one sees in Vancouver, BC, Canada, and a modern 6 lane, asphalt road as one would see in Germany or Canada or the USA. This road is then lined with parking spaces filled with new autos that are all less than 2 years old. 'Snap' just like that the street moves from peasant Middle Ages poverty to modern Europe or its equivalent.
Entire square miles of hundreds of Chinese cities are being redone in this fashion.
As always is the case the older expats always say that it was best now -XX years ago. Rock will tell you it was best 5 years ago, older hands will say that the 'Real Gold Rush' was in 1995. This is always the case for growing nations that are discovered by westerners for work, lifestyle and women.
I will tell you to get your ass on a plane this month and that the time is right now.
It's happening. Right now, this moment.
The Chinese are moving their country from 1849 to 2011 and it will be a done deal in 5 to 10 years in many parts of the country.
Hi-speed rail, hundreds of new nuclear reactors, solar and hydro power, hundreds of millions of autos, large highways, modern apartments, appliances, clothing, business opportunities like you won't see again in your lifetime.
The Chinese can be huge pains in the ass with their gargantuan culture differences, but most Chinese are very cool people to hang out with. They like foreigners - they just want you to STAY. Like Indians or Americans, they want you to come in, settle down, assimilate and stay forever. Interlopers get treated like shit because they don't value Guanxi or relationships. They are frivolous and treated as such. If you are serious, they Chinese will respect you and a gf, wife, business, apt, car - the usual - is all doable.
If you come to the country as a 22 yo college grad, and all you do is get drunk, teach ESL, f**k the local girls, take them to the clinic when they get pg, and play PS all day, then you will be treated just as you present yourself as; as someone who is not to be taken seriously.
As Rock wrote, if you are willing to and demonstrate a serious desire to relocate, settle down and make a life for yourself in China (or Asia..) they will welcome you. Your visa will still be a pain, but for work, home, romance, friends, you will be able to have a good life in China.
RP, you can come and go and they will still welcome you. Other nations, too.
But most peoples/nations want you to stay.
Think of how Americans view immigrants.
I travel every other week, it seems, to cities big and small, and I have seen exactly what Globetrotter is talking about. Development is fast and furious and doors of opportunity are opening everywhere. I make connections and find new opportunities on every trip. One could do very well here with some effort.
As an artist I am excited that the government wants to push to comic and animation industry to rival that of Japan, and they are putting a lot of money into this. Growth can be seen in so many industries and billionaires are sprouting like flowers here in China.
And, yes, everyone hopes you will stay. When they know you are serious, that's when things begin to happen.
“b***y is so strong that there are dudes willing to blow themselves up for the highly unlikely possibility of b***y in another dimension." -- Joe Rogan
"I am talking about those smaller cities referred to as Tier 3 and Tier 4. Places you have never heard of in locations you could not find on a map. The growth in these - growth I have seen with my own eyes - in just one year, is astonishing. They are literally moving from 1849 to 2011 in a matter of 3 years. In 6 months an ancient neighborhood is bulldozed, razed and in its place are modern 32 storey hi-rises as one sees in Vancouver, BC, Canada, and a modern 6 lane, asphalt road as one would see in Germany or Canada or the USA. This road is then lined with parking spaces filled with new autos that are all less than 2 years old. 'Snap' just like that the street moves from peasant Middle Ages poverty to modern Europe or its equivalent."
That sounds very impressive and yet depressing at the same time.