The problem with slavic women

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MrMan
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Re: The problem with slavic women

Post by MrMan »

sentinel89 wrote:Slavic women are good in the sense that literally nothing offends them and you can literally talk to them about anything. They tend to have informed opinions. But, the problem is, they are emotional zombies. They do not smile or get excited. Slavic people in general are very pessimistic and basically just hate the world and everything in it. They're the coldest people on the planet. Slavic women are also not likely to see the value in having many children. They tend to share the idea, "it's my life, and I don't want to have kids!" The overwhelming majority of Slavic people are the result of unplanned pregnancies. Also, their fertility rates are lower than even white AW. So if you want to have a family, you'd be much better off looking elsewhere. There are almost no family values among Slavic cultures.

I saw some Russians taking a group photograph. Instead of smiling, they made these serious, proud, dignified looking faces. I hear that in Russia and Eastern Europe, that if you walk around smiling, people think you are stupid or crazy. Smiling too much seems silly to them. I think they associate seriousness with respect. Americans may see them as being too serious. Maybe they are allowed to loosen up a little if they drink.

When I was a kid, the Russians were depicted as the evil anti-family-values atheist totalitarian bad guys who made the kids spy on their parents to report them to the state. It was strange to me to hear of Russia as a place where American men went to find wives. A plus side of their culture may be that it is probably a bit more machismo. Modern Feminism is a modified version of Marxism where the proletariate are replaced by oppressed women. But I don't think Russians have been indoctrinated with the same form of feminism to the same extent as men. So maybe the women are a bit more feminine or submissive in some ways. I don't know.

If I recall correctly, the US has slightly more unmarried males than females, and Russia has slightly more unmarried females than males. That may give foreign men an advantage there with the women, just pure supply and demand. Also, there are plenty of beautiful Russian women. Russians descend of course from Slaves, but also from the Norse, Mongols, and other groups. So there are blondes with fair skin, red-heads, and Eurasian looking women there to choose from. If an American dates a Russian woman making $500 a month, she may perceive him as being rich. He may have an economic advantage in finding a wife.

Russia has a high divorce rate. I don't know why it would be a target for wife hunters in terms of those statistics. Maybe guys who go on websites or romance tours just find they get female attention and serious consideration that they don't get back in the US. Finding women willing to marry over 'practical considerations' without having to have some kind of Dinsey movie emotional experience may be an advantage, too. If an American man is looking for a blonde-haired blue-eyed beauty who will give him serious consideration in a short period of time, Russia may have a certain appeal.

I just don't see that their dating or marriage culture is superior to ours. I can see why someone might think Filippino or Indonesian culture is superior in terms of marriage and family in certain ways and look for wives in that part of the world based partly on national culture. That's not to say you can't find a decent match from just about any country.
MrMan
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Re: The problem with slavic women

Post by MrMan »

I had a conversation with a Russian bride once at a birthday party at a restaurant at the table where I was sitting. She'd been married for a few years, I think. The story was that her husband had gone to Russia looking for a wife. The girl he was courting had accepted a marriage proposal for another man. So he asked around and some friends suggested her to work for him as an interpreter so he could go around and see sights while he was there. So they spent a lot of time together. After two weeks of her showing him around, he proposed to her. She had to think about it. Eventually, she accepted. He met her family, and told about her dad straightening up his hat so he wouldn't get cold outside, which she thought was a kind gesture, kind of showing approval for the new son-in-law.

It sounded like a really fast, whirlwind type thing. I think this kind of thing can work if you can figure out what someone is like in a short time, or just happen to find a decent person. But it's risky. If two people really believe in marriage and don't want to marry just to try the person out (or get a green card, or get money from a divorce settlement), these kind of practical marriages can work. Back in the late 1800s, men out west would find out about single women back east and propose marriage through the mail. The bride would arrive as a fiance ready to be wed before the couple had ever met. Those were early mail order brides. If you think about the shortage of men after the Civil War and the shortage of women out west, it makes sense that some women would go for this. I suppose it worked because male or female roles were defined in a sane way by society, and people believed in marriage. Divorce was something you just didn't do. It was legal only in specific cases, and highly socially stigmatized.
GoingAwol
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Re: The problem with slavic women

Post by GoingAwol »

Mr.Man.
I have talked to Russian women about the high divorce rates there and they tell me that the reason divorce rates are so high is because a lot of the men there are alcoholics and aren't good companions. They say men just kind of "check out" of the relationship at best and at worst become emotionally and physically abusive. Maybe i'm in the minority when I say this, but I can totally understand why someone wouldn't want to live with an alcoholic. I have been there and it sucks. However, I've also been told that younger Russian men aren't drinking nearly as much as the previous generations, but younger Russian men aren't as eager to get married either. Why? Apparently they feel like they don't have the money to support families and put off marriage. Plus Russian women aren't averse to pre-marital sex and that probably plays a factor in younger men not getting married too. This is just what i've been told and what i've gathered on the issue. Russia and Ukraine may not be ideal places with ideal women, but they do have an abundance of single women wanting to get married and that makes them infinitely better than the U.S.
GoingAwol
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Re: The problem with slavic women

Post by GoingAwol »

I've spoken well of Russian women thus far, now i'll talk about the dark side of Russian women. The only real problem I see with them is they can come across as very rude by American/Western standards. At first their honesty will be a breath of fresh air, but talk to enough Russian women for awhile and you'll have moments where you find them to be obnoxious and downright offensive. We gripe about American culture here a lot, but IMO, Americans are good at being diplomatic and tactful when we are trying to befriend people for the most part. Of course, there are always exceptions to the rules. I used to be friends with a guy who was overly opinionated and if you were discussing music (Just an example) he would tell you "That's gay/stupid" if you brought up a band or song that you liked if he didn't like it too. I am no longer friends with him because his opinionated nature got old after awhile. Heck... Most people who hung around him got annoyed with him. That kind of behavior is considered rude in American culture and for good reason in my opinion . There's a fine line between being honest and obnoxious. And Russians don't seem to understand this sometimes. It seems my ex-friends behavior is pretty standard there. This "Russian Rudeness" has been well documented by westerners that have visited Russia or encountered Russians elsewhere. This is why i'm anxious to visit Russia and see if I can tolerate the level of rudeness there. I hope I can because there are a lot of things I like about Russia and Russian culture.
fschmidt
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Re: The problem with slavic women

Post by fschmidt »

GoingAwol wrote:The only real problem I see with them is they can come across as very rude by American/Western standards.
Now Russia really sounds appealing. I have to visit. I love directness. And I find nothing more repulsive than the American smile.
Wolfeye
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Re: The problem with slavic women

Post by Wolfeye »

There's an old saying (if I'm getting this right): "Better to be smacked by the truth than kissed by a lie." I think this is true. Lying on its own being a point, but also it precludes improvements/adjustments. I think Russians tend to assume that someone will have their own opinions & not really be too swept up in those of other people. Like if they were to say that they like this particular band, they don't figure that the other person will feel swayed to say they like or dislike that band. I'm frequently that way, myself.

I've never had an issue with a woman that's had pre-marital sex. I could even see something of a positive, since she might have figured out some good tricks that she can use with you. Then again, it seems men aren't too hard to figure out & women learn a lot from each other. I do like a woman with skills & bedroom expertise is a positive. If she's a divorce (can't do the accent mark), that doesn't bother me. If nothing else, she might be a woman that will teach our daughter well (good & bad traits, both in men & in herself).

I notice a lot of guys don't seem to think much about how things would actually go for their kids, outside of getting jobs. In relationships, they seem to just think about f***ing & nothing else- not even if the chick's going to get them locked-up with her game-playing bullshit! Probably wouldn't make a good father, but women also don't seem to factor things like that in all that much (more than men, but not A LOT more). I notice they don't seem to notice if a guy is being considerate of them, if he has insight, if he actually takes serious things seriously- not much besides if he's tall & has money. Not even if he's jacked or intelligent. It's almost like they think it's frumpy & old-lady-like to think beyond that, but then there is something of a thought-termination addiction in this culture (posted about that earlier).
GoingAwol
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Re: The problem with slavic women

Post by GoingAwol »

Wolfeye wrote:There's an old saying (if I'm getting this right): "Better to be smacked by the truth than kissed by a lie." I think this is true.
I think you are misunderstanding me. There is nothing wrong with telling the truth, truth is good. Having said that, there are some situations where saying nothing is better than being obnoxiously honest. Case and point, the example I gave about the guy I used to be friends with. When people would mention a book,video game, song, band,movie etc. they liked he would show strong disgust and was very open about hating their taste in films,music, literature etc. It came across as obnoxious and disrespectful. Most Americans who were in his shoes would have changed the subject or said "Oh cool, I like this or that". That's not being dishonest and its not stepping on toes. It's a win/win.
Wolfeye
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Re: The problem with slavic women

Post by Wolfeye »

I get that. Did you see the next part? I'm thinking they don't figure it'll hold much sway either way. Like whoever they're talking to is not going to be offended (unless they directly insult them or get pushy, of course).

Might just be that you ran into a "streak of rudeness." You know how stupidity is pretty common in America, but there are times where none of the people you meet are like that & you feel like you're in a different country? Like that, but backward & with rudeness. New Yorkers don't really ask "How are you doing?" & actually want to know- got to Vermont & that might be different. California people seem to be WAY more PC than Texans. Things like that.

I just had a weird situation online with a Polish guy- we were agreeing about something that this other (presumably Arabic) guy was arguing against. Thought were were seeing eye-to-eye. Then I ask him about living in Poland (an idea for me, since I haven't left yet & I'm still choosing where to go) & he flips out. I had asked him if a guy that's Slavic/Italian/Celtic that's not looking to be a leech & not looking to spread towel-headed craziness would get along well over there & he goes off calling me a muslim & a moron. WTF?! So I'm thinking that either the guy confused me for something else or is just a total asshole. It happens over there, even though I'll admit that I somewhat idealized the East & still do a little bit.

Had to choke back a "Stupid Polish" joke as a response, to be honest. Don't know if the cliche is true with him & not as much the rest of the country- since I've found it's frequently not true at all when someone comes FROM Poland, at least. Anyway, one thing led to another with this subject. Didn't mean to drone on.
GoingAwol
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Re: The problem with slavic women

Post by GoingAwol »

sentinel89 wrote:
Wolfeye wrote:I think there's a lot of "damned if you do & damned if you don't" situations with women. If she's direct, it's all kinds of bullshit. If she's not being direct, she's playing games. Personally, I always liked when the chick made the first move- that way, I knew whether or not to bother.

Also, I see it as kind of gay for a man to be throwing little roadblocks into the equation with women like that- like hitting the gas & the brakes at the same time. It's something that seems a lot of women (understandably) get confused by this- because it doesn't make sense. To be wanting to sleep with a woman AND thinking she's a whore if she actually does sleep with you is ridiculous. Lots of pain in the a** "regulations" with dating in the US.
It used to be a common understanding that women would at least give a hint to a man that it was okay to approach. Just a simple smile, or intentionally dropping something right next to him to see if he would help her pick it up (this would be white knighting beta male behavior in today's age) was her subtle way of letting a man know he should approach. Nowadays I think social interactions are much more complex, with both sexes trying to "test" each other, you never really know what to expect or do. If you helped a woman pick her books up now she's probably just look at you like you're a desperate piece of crap, so it would be better to tease her for it today. It's interesting. There's no way my dad or either of my grandfathers were PUA masters, but they all managed to mate with above average women.
Sentinel,
Women still throw out those hints. The problem is they often do the things you mentioned when they aren't even interested in you! I have had it happen to me so many times.... I'll see these little floozies smiling at me, batting their eyelashes, playing with their hair etc. and then they'll look at me like i'm Michael Myers or tell me they have a boyfriend if I express any interest in them. It's confusing as h*ll.... I think this is why so many guys have approach anxiety..... You literally can't read women anymore... And it's made worse by the fact that they enjoy playing these games!
Wolfeye
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Re: The problem with slavic women

Post by Wolfeye »

GoingAwol: I think it's a mix of flirty-ness & self-aggrandizement. See, they might very well find you attractive, but they also want to feel like they're "too good." Remember that song "I'm Too Sexy For My Shirt"? Imagine if a guy was walking around playing mind games on women with that mindset- the "Interested? Too bad, I'm too good for you- ha, look how rattled she is." Also, it could simply feel like they're not in "combat mode" with the man & that seems like a precarious loophole to them.
mentor
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Re: The problem with slavic women

Post by mentor »

sentinel89 wrote:Slavic women are good in the sense that literally nothing offends them and you can literally talk to them about anything. They tend to have informed opinions. But, the problem is, they are emotional zombies. They do not smile or get excited. Slavic people in general are very pessimistic and basically just hate the world and everything in it. They're the coldest people on the planet. Slavic women are also not likely to see the value in having many children. They tend to share the idea, "it's my life, and I don't want to have kids!" The overwhelming majority of Slavic people are the result of unplanned pregnancies. Also, their fertility rates are lower than even white AW. So if you want to have a family, you'd be much better off looking elsewhere. There are almost no family values among Slavic cultures.
Oh, if this is true about the kids, this seem to be good news for me.
I am thinking to make approach to Serbian girls but though I am seriously looking for long term partnership, I do not want to settle with kids.
This information puts everything in a better base as I think of it.
Wolfeye
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Re: The problem with slavic women

Post by Wolfeye »

Mentor: What do you mean? I thought Slavics, when they bother, have very strong family values.
mentor
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Re: The problem with slavic women

Post by mentor »

Yes, but if you read sentinel's paragraph that I quoted,
he says "Slavic women are also not likely to see the value in having many children. They tend to share the idea, "it's my life, and I don't want to have kids!""
And then I say that I find this convenient in my case.
Other opinions on this?
Wolfeye
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Re: The problem with slavic women

Post by Wolfeye »

Oh! It's like "If I don't want to have kids, I don't give a shit about what others might think." Is that right?
mentor
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Re: The problem with slavic women

Post by mentor »

Wolfeye wrote:Oh! It's like "If I don't want to have kids, I don't give a shit about what others might think." Is that right?
I am not saying this is right.
I am telling that if the 'no kids' is something like common value in the majority of slavic women as the topic starter mentioned,
then this is good for persons like me, who want a solid and long relationship without this arrangement over our heads.
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