Question about trusting girls in Colombia (traumatized)

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lovemehate
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Question about trusting girls in Colombia (traumatized)

Post by lovemehate »

So like many am leaving the states (again) to find love (I have before but had to come back to Dallas) I was living in Mexico city for 5 years , learned Spanish, made friends, and had amazing relationships....but Mexico is WAY too dangerous I wont be going back, but now am looking at Colombia next....

here is my question for anyone who has some in-site from living, dating girls from or in Colombia.

can you trust them? I ask cause I know they are laid back and all about partying, well am not... I am not social, don't care to be, I hate parties....and clubs, with a deep, deep passion

I know everyone is different , but I don't care. I will not for a moment take a girl seriously that goes to clubs and bars and expects to have a relationship, that's stupid. They go, drink dance and talk to guys, would you want your wive to do that?
doubt it...am far far from a Sexpat ..I don't care about it, am not going on a sexcation. am looking for someone to really get to know and settle down with.

but this party attitude is something I will never, ever, ever deal with again. am beyond traumatized with it.

so should I stay away from here? look to other parts of the earth....

thanks!


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Tsar
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Re: Question about trusting girls in Colombia (traumatized)

Post by Tsar »

lovemehate wrote:can you trust them? I ask cause I know they are laid back and all about partying, well am not... I am not social, don't care to be, I hate parties....and clubs, with a deep, deep passion

I know everyone is different , but I don't care. I will not for a moment take a girl seriously that goes to clubs and bars and expects to have a relationship, that's stupid. They go, drink dance and talk to guys, would you want your wive to do that?
doubt it...am far far from a Sexpat ..I don't care about it, am not going on a sexcation. am looking for someone to really get to know and settle down with.
I also won't be involved with girls that go to clubs, bars, drink, talk with guys, dance with other guys, and are into partying. Those girls aren't my type. Statistically, those girls are more likely to be sluts, prior experiences, higher divorce rates, higher rates of infidelity, and not make for a meaningful relationship.
lovemehate
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Post by lovemehate »

I agree 1000000%
anytime am on dates, things for me always go serous , and fast. (my ex in mexico lasted 4 years and i asked her to be my gf on our second date) we only broke up cause I moved, I did find out about a few lies, cause am not going to even lie, am jealous . and maybe a bit possessive , but....that only comes out when someone treat me wrong or dose something Efed up .

I let girls know from day one, exactly what am about , and what I want. and there is far more good to me then bad, and I mostly things work out (on my end)

but i will tell a girl, I won't deal with that party lifestyle, and she still feels the need to go out and be a slut ? with other sluts? in a slutty situation? Dfuk she doing on dates?

I just wonder how that works in a place like Colombia
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publicduende
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Re: Question about trusting girls in Colombia (traumatized)

Post by publicduende »

Tsar wrote:I also won't be involved with girls that go to clubs, bars, drink, talk with guys, dance with other guys, and are into partying. Those girls aren't my type. Statistically, those girls are more likely to be sluts, prior experiences, higher divorce rates, higher rates of infidelity, and not make for a meaningful relationship.
...and that explains why you're still a virgin and keep on complaining without ever have met, touched and f*cked a single girl.
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publicduende
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Re: Question about trusting girls in Colombia (traumatized)

Post by publicduende »

lovemehate wrote:So like many am leaving the states (again) to find love (I have before but had to come back to Dallas) I was living in Mexico city for 5 years , learned Spanish, made friends, and had amazing relationships....but Mexico is WAY too dangerous I wont be going back, but now am looking at Colombia next....

here is my question for anyone who has some in-site from living, dating girls from or in Colombia.

can you trust them? I ask cause I know they are laid back and all about partying, well am not... I am not social, don't care to be, I hate parties....and clubs, with a deep, deep passion

I know everyone is different , but I don't care. I will not for a moment take a girl seriously that goes to clubs and bars and expects to have a relationship, that's stupid. They go, drink dance and talk to guys, would you want your wive to do that?
doubt it...am far far from a Sexpat ..I don't care about it, am not going on a sexcation. am looking for someone to really get to know and settle down with.

but this party attitude is something I will never, ever, ever deal with again. am beyond traumatized with it.

so should I stay away from here? look to other parts of the earth....

thanks! [/code]
There are lots of traditional girls in Colombia, but they tend to be found in smaller towns and rural areas. You say you're already fluent in Spanish, so you shouldn't find any problem finding a good looking, morally sound young woman who is looking to settle with a good man.

Consider though one thing: dancing and partying is part and parcel of the Colombian social DNA. Every excuse is good to throw or be invited to a party and have the usual mix of alcohol, dancing and flirting. Even if you want to settle with one of those traditional girls, you will be certainly be expected to join her and her family in that kind of situation, at least twice or three times a year. Things of course may change if you chose to marry your Colombiana and take her to the US, or any country where dancing isn't compulsory physical activity. I am married to a Colombian woman and, despite all of my efforts to learn salsa, merengue, bachata and the lot, I have never left the absolute n00b territory. Especially when my wife has a decent dancing partner to join, which happens when we (rarely) go to a Latino venue or restaurant in London.

Good luck!
Billy
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Post by Billy »

damn maybe i should really check colombia as i am a dance freak before i am too old:)
lovemehate
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Post by lovemehate »

@ publicduende

Well my Spanish is not fluent but its on a advanced level for sure.
one question.....
I don't dance,...I won't do it..I dont like it, i wont even try it.
its weird to me. I avoid it like a plague

even when I was in mexico, and the few dance-like situations where weird, I had a girl try to drag me to dance, and i reject her. no matter how hot, nope...wont do it, sorry....Ill invite them to have a drink, but am not dancing.

I can't explain my hatred for it, but its there.....
but again, am not that social so its not like its a problem, and I have that horrible stigma or judgmental view on girls who do go to bars/clubs/dancing that I have never dated a girl who enjoys it either....

starting to think I might not be a good fit..
abcdavid01
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Re: Question about trusting girls in Colombia (traumatized)

Post by abcdavid01 »

publicduende wrote:
Tsar wrote:I also won't be involved with girls that go to clubs, bars, drink, talk with guys, dance with other guys, and are into partying. Those girls aren't my type. Statistically, those girls are more likely to be sluts, prior experiences, higher divorce rates, higher rates of infidelity, and not make for a meaningful relationship.
...and that explains why you're still a virgin and keep on complaining without ever have met, touched and f*cked a single girl.
Because he won't lower his standards?
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E Irizarry R&B Singer
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Post by E Irizarry R&B Singer »

lovemehate wrote:@ publicduende

Well my Spanish is not fluent but its on a advanced level for sure.
one question.....
I don't dance,...I won't do it..I dont like it, i wont even try it.
its weird to me. I avoid it like a plague

even when I was in mexico, and the few dance-like situations where weird, I had a girl try to drag me to dance, and i reject her. no matter how hot, nope...wont do it, sorry....Ill invite them to have a drink, but am not dancing.

I can't explain my hatred for it, but its there.....
but again, am not that social so its not like its a problem, and I have that horrible stigma or judgmental view on girls who do go to bars/clubs/dancing that I have never dated a girl who enjoys it either....

starting to think I might not be a good fit..
Dancing is an integral part of Latino culture - are you - crazy? If you expect to diminish your chances of having a faster/urban Colombiana cheat on you, you better put in some bachata, cumbia, salsa and regueton work on the dancefloor!

You're acting like an old maid, pana.

Dancing in Latin America is considered foreplay - a preamble - to the Latin American Constitution of Copulation. It would make her getting into the camita with you muy facil. ¡¡Creéme!! ¡¡No hablo ningunas mentiras asi!!!
lovemehate
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Post by lovemehate »

I know its part of their culture, but when I Was In Mexico, theres such a huge rock culture, and the two don't normally mix . that it was very easy to avoid dancing.

I played in a few rock/metal bands while I was there. and I never had issues meeting people that did not go to bar/clubs (note I don't count rock shows as the same type of scene as people do go for the music/art).

but thats like me saying, everyone that dosent enjoy my past times (photography music gaming) should? I should not have to change my interests....am open minded about a lot of things, dancing? will never be one of them.
Tsar
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Re: Question about trusting girls in Colombia (traumatized)

Post by Tsar »

publicduende wrote:
Tsar wrote:I also won't be involved with girls that go to clubs, bars, drink, talk with guys, dance with other guys, and are into partying. Those girls aren't my type. Statistically, those girls are more likely to be sluts, prior experiences, higher divorce rates, higher rates of infidelity, and not make for a meaningful relationship.
...and that explains why you're still a virgin and keep on complaining without ever have met, touched and f*cked a single girl.
The reason is I refuse to lower my standards, lose it to a girl that f***ed another guy, and I won't date a girl that calls grinding up against a guy dancing. Grinding is almost foreplay and slutty.

Ballroom dancing or slow dancing are tradition forms of European dancing.

Grinding is whore dancing and thugs love whores grinding against them.
lovemehate
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Post by lovemehate »

this guys is 100percent right.
It really is a slutty thing. I can chalk it up to a cultural difference in the case of Columbia, but most of the world? sluts. plain and simple
no NO I repeat NO respectable girl (or guy for that matter) dose this.

sure they can be going out and having fun, but if thats someones Idea of fun? then they are not the one for me.

No one should ever lower their standards.
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E Irizarry R&B Singer
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Post by E Irizarry R&B Singer »

lovemehate wrote:I know its part of their culture, but when I Was In Mexico, theres such a huge rock culture, and the two don't normally mix . that it was very easy to avoid dancing.

I played in a few rock/metal bands while I was there. and I never had issues meeting people that did not go to bar/clubs (note I don't count rock shows as the same type of scene as people do go for the music/art).

but thats like me saying, everyone that dosent enjoy my past times (photography music gaming) should? I should not have to change my interests....am open minded about a lot of things, dancing? will never be one of them.
Oh you're right; I have slightly forgotten. Mexico and Chile (the latter I have been to) are very big on Anglo-rock and rock en español too. It seems like the more White-Anglo worshipping a country is that lacks African roots is usually big on Anglo culture. On the contrary, Dominican Republic, Puerto Rico (even as Americanized as it is), and Cuba (i.e. the Latin-Caribbean) don't rock to rock en español hardly...mainly due to their African part of their heritage which has interpolations of African tribal music in their merengue, salsa, bachata, reguéton (contemporary Spanish dancehall reggae with Spanish-lyrical rapping), and sometimes cumbia.

Cumbia sounds so Jamaican-ska-ish arrangement-wise that it amazes me how much music they got from the Olmecs, but I'm digressing!!!!

Mexican cumbia is muy sexi!. Rancheras is dreamy and likeable. Corridos is kinda corny. Los Razos...I love their music LOL! Tejanawise, it was the late Selena. If she were alive today, she probably would have taken the place of Rihanna as the illuminati poster child. Selena was finnnnne! She could have gotten it from me! (i.e. I would bang her if she were still alive) LOL!

Llegamos al fin! Basta ya! I want to dance to some Dominican merengue!!!! *Rock, Ladislav, and I form a circle chanting "Ellos son mania! Seguimos! Pa lante! No le pegue a la negra"* LOL
Last edited by E Irizarry R&B Singer on April 23rd, 2013, 7:40 pm, edited 1 time in total.
lovemehate
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Post by lovemehate »

One thing I LOVE about Mexico, is they never adopted that bullshit gangster ghetto shit, sure there is a very small subculture, but they are looked down upon and laughed at, by everyone. I love it. f**k those people.
mexican rap Is the worst thing you will ever hear in your life.
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E Irizarry R&B Singer
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Post by E Irizarry R&B Singer »

lovemehate wrote:One thing I LOVE about Mexico, is they never adopted that bullshit gangster ghetto shit, sure there is a very small subculture, but they are looked down upon and laughed at, by everyone. I love it. f**k those people.
mexican rap Is the worst thing you will ever hear in your life.
You call it Mexican Rap; I call it Chicano Rap.
"Ese" rap which is pura mierda. (pure b.s.).

Yeah I f.ucked up by going to South America wearing New Era fitted hats, baggy jeans, and timberland boots.
I would have had better assortment of women if I had dressed "dapper".

When I came back from South America, ContrarianExpatriate dissed the livid s.hit out of me for dressing ghetto down there. LOL He'll tell you if you PM him! LOL
So now my closet has 6 suits, 12 colorful collared shirts, 5 slacks - all well fitted. ;-)
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