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Why do many of you want to go abroad but never do?

What's your story? Discussions your reasons for going abroad.

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Postby djfourmoney » Tue Aug 21, 2012 3:06 am

Why would you be out of place in a hostel? I've said this before, what I enjoy doing fits right in with many people younger than myself. The only common thing we don't share is attending college but really is that a big deal? It wasn't one when I stayed in a hostel full of mostly college students in 2007.

I think Americans worry about money too much because we have commodified everything in America. That is not the case in much of the rest of the world.

There's also many jobs that locals can't or won't do just like in America were we allow immigrants from poor countries to come in to do those jobs, why do you think the EU wants to allow the Baltic states to join the EU?

If you don't mind packing boxes as Renata did or working temp jobs then you're not cut out to leave your so-called cushy surroundings in America.
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Postby noog » Tue Aug 21, 2012 6:12 pm

For those of us who have job/family here and are looking to bring a bride back to the States, I think trying to save up a large block of vacation time and having your boss approve your long trip is a deterrent. I'm very lucky to have an understanding boss for my forthcoming 2 1/2 week trip!
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Postby publicduende » Tue Aug 21, 2012 8:58 pm

noog wrote:For those of us who have job/family here and are looking to bring a bride back to the States, I think trying to save up a large block of vacation time and having your boss approve your long trip is a deterrent. I'm very lucky to have an understanding boss for my forthcoming 2 1/2 week trip!


...or just be a freelance consultant (a "contractor" as we call it in the UK) and if your contract is, say, 6 or 12 months it's much easier to ask your manager to extend it after a "sabbatical" of 4 or 8 weeks, or even longer if suits. Alternatively, you can just not have the contract renewed and join another company whenever you're back.
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Postby Winston » Mon Jan 14, 2013 4:23 pm

A word of advice to everyone:

Your mind can be your own worst enemy. If you think about going abroad, your mind will find excuses not to, or things you have to do first. It's better that you not think at all, and simply DO IT. Act as if a hurricane were coming to your town and you have to get out in a few days or you will be killed. That will force you to leave. And once you do, once you get the ball rolling, you'll be glad you did. :)

So remember, it's best to just do it without thinking about it. Thinking allows your mind, your own worst enemy, to become negative and invent excuses. The trick is to not think about it, and just run on instinct as if a hurricane were coming to your town.

Hope that helps. lol
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Postby Contrarian Expatriate » Mon Jan 14, 2013 5:14 pm

Going abroad is not an easy task for an American. Negative family pressure, peer ridicule, lack of familiarity, fear of the unknown, financial considerations all weigh down on a man who won't relocate.

I suggest baby steps. Just travel to different regions in the states and Canada first. Travel to Miami, New Orleans, Santa Fe, Montreal, Quebec City, etc. That gets you accustomed to travel in general and illustrates the rewards of going thru with it.

After that, just start going to Latin America, Eastern Europe or Asia and dabbling in some foreign cultures. That's when the bug bites and many realize that it can be done. But by definition, expatriates is in the minority because of the complexity and strength of conviction it takes to be one.
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Postby pete98146 » Mon Jan 14, 2013 7:00 pm

Contrarian Expatriate wrote:Going abroad is not an easy task for an American. Negative family pressure, peer ridicule, lack of familiarity, fear of the unknown, financial considerations all weigh down on a man who won't relocate.

I suggest baby steps. Just travel to different regions in the states and Canada first. Travel to Miami, New Orleans, Santa Fe, Montreal, Quebec City, etc. That gets you accustomed to travel in general and illustrates the rewards of going thru with it.

After that, just start going to Latin America, Eastern Europe or Asia and dabbling in some foreign cultures. That's when the bug bites and many realize that it can be done. But by definition, expatriates is in the minority because of the complexity and strength of conviction it takes to be one.


One good tip for those of you guys that use a credit card is to get one thru United Airlines. You get points for every dollar that you put on the card. I tend to average a free round trip ticket every 7-8 years. It's a good trick for you younger guys. Just don't go silly and max out the credit card tho...
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Postby Johnny1975 » Mon Jan 14, 2013 8:43 pm

Speaking for myself, here are my reasons for not going abroad at this time :

1) It's a huge change of lifestyle and investment / effort. What if it all ends up being a waste of time for one reason or another? What if it's not as good as I thought it might be? If it was a case of moving to a country that borders your own, maybe it's still worth the risk, but travelling halfway across a continent or the world is big. The worst potential scenario is that one goes to all the trouble, it doesn't work out, and then one becomes even more cynical than before, which is very depressing to think about. It's not just the risk of failure and the massive investment required, it's also what it could turn you into if it doesn't work.

2) I don't have the money.

People who have a lot of money, and time, and who do a fair bit of travelling anyway, they're the lucky ones. They don't have to worry about the above. But not everyone is in that situation. I don't think it's constructive to be judgmental towards those who can't go.

This is why for me, it's not about going abroad. Until world travel becomes like jumping on a bus, it won't be. It's about clarifying what I want in a woman and trying to identify those cultures and lifestyles where I may find what I'm looking for. Yes, it will take longer, but so be it. Decent women do exist in western countries. The problem is that they are rare. But I believe that in order to identify and recognise them when I see them, I have to think outside the box and think beyond what I'm used to wanting and what I'm used to expecting. I believe that when I find a source of decent women that I will be surprised as to where they were all along. They probably won't be what I was expecting.

And let's face it, many people just go abroad out of desperation and they fall for scams and get themselves into weird scenarios that they didn't anticipate. There are pros and cons to both my apoproach and the approach of going abroad. For example, getting caught up in the romance and excitement of being in a new country can cloud one's judgment, as can the feeling of finally(!) being seen as an alpha male by the female population of an entire country. These factors are very powerful, and they're a distraction. It's not about which is better (going abroad V not going), it's about making the best of your situation, and keeping your head screwed one. It's not just about finding a decent woman, it's also about learning something about yourself too.
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Postby Banano » Mon Jan 14, 2013 10:28 pm

Winston wrote:A word of advice to everyone:

Your mind can be your own worst enemy. If you think about going abroad, your mind will find excuses not to, or things you have to do first. It's better that you not think at all, and simply DO IT. Act as if a hurricane were coming to your town and you have to get out in a few days or you will be killed. That will force you to leave. And once you do, once you get the ball rolling, you'll be glad you did. :)

So remember, it's best to just do it without thinking about it. Thinking allows your mind, your own worst enemy, to become negative and invent excuses. The trick is to not think about it, and just run on instinct as if a hurricane were coming to your town.

Hope that helps. lol




Winston

How about you listen to your own advice and start travelling instead of telling others to do what you dont want to do yourself

You been complaining about TW for too long , its time to act, you are good with money and you could survive on $1000 a month and you have that much from online business, i think you lost desire for some reason, i cnt see enthusiasm you used to have

How is TW different that your miserable life you had in US?
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Postby soontobefree » Mon Jan 14, 2013 10:35 pm

For me, it really boils down to money. However, once I finish my studies this year, I'll be set to teach English overseas next year. I enjoy teaching and it seems to be the easiest way for me to just get out there and get a taste of living abroad.
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Postby sfexcellence » Mon Jan 14, 2013 11:40 pm

Winston wrote:A word of advice to everyone:

Your mind can be your own worst enemy. If you think about going abroad, your mind will find excuses not to, or things you have to do first. It's better that you not think at all, and simply DO IT. Act as if a hurricane were coming to your town and you have to get out in a few days or you will be killed. That will force you to leave. And once you do, once you get the ball rolling, you'll be glad you did. :)

So remember, it's best to just do it without thinking about it. Thinking allows your mind, your own worst enemy, to become negative and invent excuses. The trick is to not think about it, and just run on instinct as if a hurricane were coming to your town.

Hope that helps. lol


My advice exactly. When I went back to Switzerland with no money + no return ticket, with a plan on trying to make a life for myself there, the final step was to go by isntinct and just do it, not think but just do, and then to take action again and again, developing the skill over time. Now if you would just do this Winston, then you'd be in business and an example to others, but right now not so much.
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Postby sfexcellence » Mon Jan 14, 2013 11:44 pm

Contrarian Expatriate wrote:Going abroad is not an easy task for an American. Negative family pressure, peer ridicule, lack of familiarity, fear of the unknown, financial considerations all weigh down on a man who won't relocate.

I suggest baby steps. Just travel to different regions in the states and Canada first. Travel to Miami, New Orleans, Santa Fe, Montreal, Quebec City, etc. That gets you accustomed to travel in general and illustrates the rewards of going thru with it.

After that, just start going to Latin America, Eastern Europe or Asia and dabbling in some foreign cultures. That's when the bug bites and many realize that it can be done. But by definition, expatriates is in the minority because of the complexity and strength of conviction it takes to be one.


Those are all excuses you list, excusues that can be easily overcome! Baby steps work, but the big risks are the highest paying ones, and when you get the travel bug and don't want to stop, but only only get better. Someday is the perfect excuse to avoid the intense thinking and decision making that is neccesary to create a wonderful life in the here and now, not two years from now for example.
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Postby Jester » Mon Jan 21, 2013 5:19 am

Winston wrote:A word of advice to everyone:

Your mind can be your own worst enemy. If you think about going abroad, your mind will find excuses not to, or things you have to do first. It's better that you not think at all, and simply DO IT. Act as if a hurricane were coming to your town and you have to get out in a few days or you will be killed. That will force you to leave. And once you do, once you get the ball rolling, you'll be glad you did. :)

So remember, it's best to just do it without thinking about it. Thinking allows your mind, your own worst enemy, to become negative and invent excuses. The trick is to not think about it, and just run on instinct as if a hurricane were coming to your town.

Hope that helps. lol


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Postby anamericaninbangkok » Tue Jul 30, 2013 12:45 am

Personally, I'd much rather sleep in a hostel or cheap hotel than on someone's couch who I do not know.
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Postby Hero » Tue Jul 30, 2013 1:19 am

I do the best I can with the little bit of vacation time that I have. I've already made two trips to the Ukraine this year.

I predict that I'll crash and burn at my current job sooner rather than later due to job dissatisfaction. That's when it'll be time for me to pack my bags and leave for good.
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Postby aozora13 » Tue Jul 30, 2013 10:46 pm

Hero wrote:I do the best I can with the little bit of vacation time that I have. I've already made two trips to the Ukraine this year.

I predict that I'll crash and burn at my current job sooner rather than later due to job dissatisfaction. That's when it'll be time for me to pack my bags and leave for good.


+1

I agree you can set up trips for your vacation if you know how to balance the average 12-13 day vacation time for American worker (not including the extra days that is to be used for sick/appointment/things happen). I am able to accumulate days from my current company so I can go longer. Unfortunately, at my current job it is not possible to leave beyond 1 week because since it is one of the unfortunate shift IT jobs, it is 27hx7d job that requires a person here at all times. I am trying to get a normal hour job so I hope that I can work normally and be able to go on two small trips in the year. This is my goal to do as I think if you are single, have money saved up, you can schedule time off and look for good deals to get used to traveling.

Hero's trip is a little far because of costs but he was able to do it two times which shows that he saved his vacation and money to go on the trip. Americans can do it if they reduce spending on mainly wants. I save a lot but I still buy crap I should not buy such as games, IT hardware (sometimes), and possibly a smart-phone which I bought although I had my old phone for over 3 years already.
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