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Why do many of you want to go abroad but never do?

What's your story? Discussions your reasons for going abroad.

Moderators: jamesbond, fschmidt

Postby Ghost » Sun Dec 01, 2013 7:16 am

Fear was the main reason I didn't go abroad. Most of it came from 2 things:

1. Things I read on the internet. For example, it is very easy to meet bitchy foreign women online and then assume that's a normal example of what the typical woman there is like. Actually going there will almost certainly be different from your limited knowledge gleaned from the internet.

2. Just being afraid of travel. One's family can be good as dissuading you. "What if someone kidnaps you and kills you?" It's very easy to continually live in fear if you keep giving into paranoid notions and guilt trips.

Other than that, I was always worried about money as well. But since it's easy to work online or get an EFL job, it's not that big of a problem.
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Postby Maverick » Sun Dec 01, 2013 9:29 am

theprimebait wrote:no $$$.

I'm only 20 though.lol


Dude, don't waste your time on here if you're only 20.

Are you in college?

Just go out and talk to a bunch of girls.
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Postby Billy » Sun Dec 01, 2013 5:38 pm

Johnny1975 wrote:
Billy wrote:
Johnny1975 wrote:I'm one of those people who thinks about but doesn't do it. My reasons are :

* Panic attacks. I used to have them, and when you've had a few you develop a fear of having them, and that's what I have. The thought of suddenly being in another world is very scary

* I haven't travelled in years and years, which makes it worse

* If I was to go to Tenerife, which is where I'm from, and which is one of the places that I'd love to go to (I've been there a few times) I would get very emotional, which would make the panic thing worse. ie memories, feeling a bit uncomfortable and out of touch, etc

* Money. But that's the least of my worries, and it's not a huge problem ultimately

So I feel stuck. It's horrible.


Damn, you are orginally from Tenerife? That´s a beautifull place isn´t it? Man I played with the thought of settling there but I don´t know for shure.


It is. People think of it as just a holiday destination. It's much more than that. And there's a lot of history. For example, latin America was originally populated by people from there (and the other islands).


So do you still live there? Your name suggest your Anglo, right? How comes? How is it is with girls there? There should be some latinas there? Are the real estates still expensive?
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Postby Winston » Wed Apr 02, 2014 5:02 am

Hi all,
I have some realizations to share with you. I think I get now why a lot of you want to go abroad but never do. It's not really just about time and money. It's a lot of things.

Yes, most of you are very negative and that gives you less energy to work with and creates a demon inside you that helps to defeat yourself and sabotages your plans. That's to be expected since living in a toxic negative culture makes you negative. But the negative attitude becomes a part of you as well. That's the sad part. We all deal with that.

But modern life is also way overcomplicated. There are just too many things you have to take care of, more than the human brain can remember. Even trying to make a to do list of everything you have to do would be a tedious task in itself. So each day, you can only remember a few things. Plus everything takes longer than you expect too, at least twice as long, because every task involves multiple steps and multiple decisions, if done right.

You only have 24 hours in a day, and half of that is spent sleeping, eating, cooking, cleaning and doing housework and errands. So that leaves you 12 hours, but you gotta use some of that to rest too. You can't be working every minute. So if you rest 3 hours a day, that leaves you 9 hours left to do whatever it is you want for the day. And if you have a job, that takes up the whole 9 hours, leaving you ZERO time left.

If you are fortunate enough not to need an enslaving job, then you have 9 hours left to do your things. But since time goes fast, it's not enough. Plus, you can't just work non-stop. You have to pause and rest a lot too. Eventually, you only get to do a third of what you want to do that day. So the rest carries over to the next day, and so on. In the end, everything takes a lot longer than you expect, and the months and years go by.

What's more, life seems to constantly throw a pile of problems in your path, so you can never reach a completion stage and proceed with your plans.

Isn't that how it is?

But there's another unfortunate factor here too, one that most people don't like to talk about.

MURPHY'S LAW

There does seem to be an invisible force around us that likes to go against our intentions and wishes. It enjoys tripping us and putting obstacles in our path. It enjoys putting temptation before us, and then yanking it away, as if saying "Na na na na na, you can't have it!" It likes to mess up our plans by throwing endless problems in front of us. So trying to move or relocate is like trying to get off Gilligan's Island -- in every episode something goes wrong. I've experienced this too many times consistently, many thousands of times, to the point where I know it can't be due to pure coincidence, chance or randomness.

I think nearly everyone experiences Murphy's Law. They may call it streaks of bad luck, but it's the same thing. So we all know what I mean. It's just that in America, people don't like to talk about Murphy's Law because it sounds negative and whiney, like you are blaming bad luck and superstitious forces for your predicament. So it's kind of a taboo term. Plus it makes you look like a loser if you complain about bad luck too much.

But the force does seem real nevertheless. When it happens everyday, thousands of times, after a while you realize it's not a coincidence. Some type of force really is working against you. There's a definite pattern that is not in accord with chance and coincidence. For example, if a 50/50 chance goes against you 90 to 95 percent of the time, many times consistently, then you know it can't be just a coincidence. And this applies to many things in life, from the trivial to the important. An infinite number of examples could be given.

There are books and websites that give many examples of Murphy's Law. Here are some webpages that list many examples:

http://www.murphys-laws.com/murphy/murphy-laws.html
http://www.murphys-laws.com/murphy/murphy-love.html

I could add many examples of my own to them. If you've seen the Snoopy and Charlie Brown cartoons and comics, you know what I mean. The Charlie Brown character is plagued with Murphy's Law to the extreme. Some people's real lives are like that, unfortunately. We've all known some of them.

I would define Murphy's Law like this: In a field of randomness, coincidences are calculated to go against you in a consistent pattern, to the point where you realize it's not pure randomness.

Note to skeptics: I understand that flukes happen everyday which defy chance. But that's not what I mean. I'm talking about CONSISTENT patterns in defying the laws of chance. For example, if I'm at an intersection and not sure which way to turn, and guess in a 50/50 chance, but I take the wrong turn 90 percent of the time, EVERY TIME hundreds of times, that's not a coincidence. I'm sorry but not everything in life is explainable by science and laws of probability. There are many many things that can't be explained by mundane conventional explanations. Some skeptics can't accept that, but it's true nonetheless.

Anyhow, the phenomenon known as Murphy's Law does seem real and consistent. The only question is whether the force known as Murphy's Law is emanating from your subconscious mind (as New Agers and pop psychologists would claim) or if it's some metaphysical 3rd law of Newton: "For every action, there's an equal and opposite reaction." In other words, for every intention you have, the universe sends the opposite intention as an obstacle in your path to block you or trip you up. It's basically action=reaction at work. Other possible explanations are curses, bad karma from past lives, or non-physical entities at work.

You can laugh at this if you want. But we've all experienced it many times, even if we don't like to admit it. Even left brained Atheists that only believe in the physical universe, such as Momopi, have experienced it, even if they don't like to admit it. But it seems to plague some people more than others. I seem to be one of the ones for which Murphy's Law strongly affects. Even some of my skeptical friends, like Rock, became believers in Murphy's Law after witnessing it around me multiple times. After all, seeing is believing. Rock eventually dubbed it "Charlie Brown luck".

I wonder how New Agers, believers in Karma and the Law of Attraction, and those who believe in a just God, would explain Murphy's Law, since it doesn't fit into their paradigm? However, I don't think they can explain it though, since they can't even explain the timeless dilemma of "Why do bad things happen to good people?" that philosophers have asked for thousands of years. Even Job, in the Book of Job in the Bible, who asked that question throughout the whole story, did not receive a logical explanation from God at the end.

I do think though, that there is validity in the New Age/pop psychology claim that negative beliefs and attitudes result in self-fulfilling prophecies that produce negative outcomes. We've all seen that at work. So it's definitely a real phenomenon. But couldn't we argue conversely that our negative attitudes are a RESULT of our experiences as well, rather than the cause of them?

Either way, I'm not sure that could explain Murphy's Law though, unless our minds are capable of affecting external matter (like a subtle psychokinesis) to make external factors and forces go against us. But if our minds are the source of the problem, then it's good news, because it means that it can be changed and controlled, though it's not easy since the mind is not easily changed.

However, even if this is true, I think New Agers take it too far in claiming that we are responsible for everything and that everything is under our mind's control. They may not put it like that, but they insinuate that in their theories and teachings. The mind cannot be responsible for everything. There are real victims in life, and bad things do happen to good people, which has plagued philosophers for thousands of years. And those who are positive, brave and fearless have died while taking risks. So not everything is completely under our control. We need to understand that, lest we will take reckless risks that endanger our lives, thinking that nothing can go wrong as long as we are positive and devoid of negative attitudes.

So anyway, what do you all think? Are any of you willing to admit that you've experienced Murphy's Law or Charlie Brown luck consistently, even if makes you sound like a loser? Or do you know anyone who has, to the point where it can't be due to randomness or coincidence? If so, what's your explanation?
Last edited by Winston on Wed Apr 02, 2014 2:41 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Postby xiongmao » Wed Apr 02, 2014 1:58 pm

I didn't start traveling till 2005, when I was 33.

It kind of never really occurred to me that I could go traveling on my own. So I took some red pills and booked my own trip to NYC. The following year it was Hong Kong, and that lead to my going to Asia to live for a while.

I will go traveling again, but I packed so much into my time abroad last year that I'm OK for a while. I've done enough for a while, and I'm busy being content with my life back home. Maybe Winston is the same.
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Postby djfourmoney » Fri Apr 04, 2014 6:22 am

I agree with you Winston, but let me offer a slightly different look.

Much of what happens is not so much about Murphy's Law, Law(s) of Attraction and other sorts of non-scientific based phenomena. It actually is little things that grow into much larger, uncontrollable situations.

Example -

You pretty much mimic what you know best. IE, if your parents are middle class, its likely you'll be middle class. Just as people that are born poor often stay that way. Its doing what will not cause poverty to start with that breaks the cycle of so-called bad luck which is actually a series of small but poor decisions that end up impacting long term goals.

What do poor people do?

1) They tend to have children at a young age
2) They tend to not value education
3) They are attacked for not doing what others consider "normal"

So if its normal to have a child at 16, if its normal to ditch school all the time and if its normal to do these things because your friends do it, guess what you end up in the same position your parents were in because they made the exact same mistakes.

The cycle of poverty continues, until one person takes all the above seriously. Education is the key to marketable skills that allow you to live outside the hood. Children are not suppose to be an unintended part of life. Nothing is planned perfectly but there is nothing surprising about having a child.

Staying away from people that will undermine you is likely the most important part because peer pressure has ramifications that are hard to fathom.

Most people on here are ultra negative is linked to their disappointing life up to this point. They don't have as much money as they thought they might have when they were in elementary school. They aren't doing the job they wanted the most as a child. This is because while people love to ask you what you wanna be, they hardly explain to you what exactly you need to do to reach your goal. Likely because they never reached their goals either and its a deterrent when it doesn't seem like it.

This is why the internet is more important than ever but is used more as a form of entertainment than a tool to learn useful information or skills.

95% of the threads in the General Forum are about negative aspects of Western Culture. When these people are challenged on their negativity, somebody wants to play armchair psychologist and say it's natural to allow people to vent their anger. But what happens after anger? Nothing is what happens, absolutely NOTHING.

How many times have I suggested two or three different methods to make some extra money? How many people are doing that? What do they do otherwise? They attack me for not completing my own task. Then I have to remind them that at one point I had more money than the majority of people make in a year in cash available to me, I was in a hostel in Frankfurt, Germany with a good looking Russian woman telling me I should come visit her in Turkey.

As I said above, a series of seemly good but bad decisions has me at my parents house, I dropped my newest smartphone that will cost me $158 to fix and haven't been able to donate Plasma for two months because the last time they took about 200cc's of blood on accident (the machine did it). So that's no different than donating blood, you can only do that roughly twice a year. They took 200cc so I had to build that back up again, it takes 60 or so days.

You could say this is "Murphy's Law" but really this goes back to two, maybe three decisions.

1) When flushed with my largess, I should have done the intelligent thing which would be to pay off all debts. Including the car, I had maybe $13,000 total in debt, when I had $62,000 in cash.

That would have eliminated all debts, which would have boosted my credit score. When I bought the car, it didn't require a co-signer which was a relief myFICO score was 620 which resulted in a 11.4% interest rate for 60 months. By paying that and my school debt, I am positive my score would be at least 700.

This also would have meant that returning back to work at Pep Boys just became that much less important without any debt to service.

2) I would have gone to Turkey with nothing to lose and everything to gain. That woman and me didn't work, I might not have had a job but I wouldn't be in debt either and flushed with money. With no car payments to make, I would have said at least $10,000. Meaning when the transmission took a dump, spending $1,500 would haven't meant less because at the time that happen, I was down to my last $5,000.

3) I wouldn't have been in Riverside, CA where I got into an accident with my car and ultimately lost it to the bank with only 8 payments left!

So that's why I can't simply blame "Murphy's Law" for the things that happen since then. Since our society runs on money, having more of it is a good thing, having less means you're options are limited. Since I lived at home during this and since that time, there was no excuse not to do what I should have done with was paying off debt.

Understanding why you are here is the first step in figuring how to get out of it.

Sure I can make more money at a job, that's the benefit. But what are the negatives?

For one the reality is LA is a car based city. Its really not practical to use public transit unless you can ride maybe two buses max and takes less than an hour to get to work. Anything more, especially at min wage becomes really unattractive at this point. Especially since the Government has basically done NOTHING to fix the problem, settling for a "Market Solution" to a simple problem of too much debt in the system.

Just as health care reform is a market based solution. The way to solve the problem is eliminate the market from health care as so many other 1st world countries have done, especially Switzerland since they tried it our way first.... This is possible because so many Americans have limited knowledge of what happens outside of our boarders which is why lies like "They hate us for our lifestyle and freedom" are easily sold to most Americans. The War On Terror is getting harder to sell because of the internet having such a large impact on our lives, much more so than in 2001, that when John Kerry talks about Russia invading Crimea is against international law, when the US did just that when it invaded Iraq, it makes him look stupid and why it fell so flat.

Once we start making the right decisions and not letting markets decide everything we'll be on the right path in the US, but by then it might be too late as some things could be irreversible, yes I am talking about the climate.

Solar Power will become mass adopted in the next decade as prices of panels come down, but by waiting for China to prefect how to make panels cheaply we have likely baked in any changes to our ecosystem and slowed down the adoption of electric cars.

That is what is wrong with "market based solutions".

That is bit off-topic but again needs to be said because not everything can be blamed on happenstance. Many people are active participants in their own demise/failures.
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Postby momopi » Fri Apr 04, 2014 5:16 pm

Winston wrote:But modern life is also way over-complicated. There are just too many things you have to take care of, more than the human brain can remember. Even trying to make a to do list of everything you have to do would be a tedious task in itself. So each day, you can only remember a few things. Plus everything takes longer than you expect too, at least twice as long, because every task involves multiple steps and multiple decisions, if done right.
You only have 24 hours in a day, and half of that is spent sleeping, eating, cooking, cleaning and doing housework and errands. So that leaves you 12 hours, but you gotta use some of that to rest too. You can't be working every minute. So if you rest 3 hours a day, that leaves you 9 hours left to do whatever it is you want for the day. And if you have a job, that takes up the whole 9 hours, leaving you ZERO time left.


Out-source your errands. Google mealku and see if it's avail in LV, if not you could start your own local exchange (might be a profitable venture).



djfourmoney wrote: Solar Power will become mass adopted in the next decade as prices of panels come down, but by waiting for China to prefect how to make panels cheaply we have likely baked in any changes to our ecosystem and slowed down the adoption of electric cars.
That is what is wrong with "market based solutions".


Electric (and solar) power is heavily affected by regulations, subsidies, and politics. i.e. Edison must petition the Utility Commission for rate increases.
Last edited by momopi on Fri Apr 04, 2014 5:28 pm, edited 3 times in total.
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Postby aozora13 » Fri Apr 04, 2014 5:22 pm

djfourmoney wrote:I agree with you Winston, but let me offer a slightly different look.

Much of what happens is not so much about Murphy's Law, Law(s) of Attraction and other sorts of non-scientific based phenomena. It actually is little things that grow into much larger, uncontrollable situations.

Example -

You pretty much mimic what you know best. IE, if your parents are middle class, its likely you'll be middle class. Just as people that are born poor often stay that way. Its doing what will not cause poverty to start with that breaks the cycle of so-called bad luck which is actually a series of small but poor decisions that end up impacting long term goals.

What do poor people do?

1) They tend to have children at a young age
2) They tend to not value education
3) They are attacked for not doing what others consider "normal"

So if its normal to have a child at 16, if its normal to ditch school all the time and if its normal to do these things because your friends do it, guess what you end up in the same position your parents were in because they made the exact same mistakes.

The cycle of poverty continues, until one person takes all the above seriously. Education is the key to marketable skills that allow you to live outside the hood. Children are not suppose to be an unintended part of life. Nothing is planned perfectly but there is nothing surprising about having a child.

Staying away from people that will undermine you is likely the most important part because peer pressure has ramifications that are hard to fathom.

Most people on here are ultra negative is linked to their disappointing life up to this point. They don't have as much money as they thought they might have when they were in elementary school. They aren't doing the job they wanted the most as a child. This is because while people love to ask you what you wanna be, they hardly explain to you what exactly you need to do to reach your goal. Likely because they never reached their goals either and its a deterrent when it doesn't seem like it.

This is why the internet is more important than ever but is used more as a form of entertainment than a tool to learn useful information or skills.

95% of the threads in the General Forum are about negative aspects of Western Culture. When these people are challenged on their negativity, somebody wants to play armchair psychologist and say it's natural to allow people to vent their anger. But what happens after anger? Nothing is what happens, absolutely NOTHING.

How many times have I suggested two or three different methods to make some extra money? How many people are doing that? What do they do otherwise? They attack me for not completing my own task. Then I have to remind them that at one point I had more money than the majority of people make in a year in cash available to me, I was in a hostel in Frankfurt, Germany with a good looking Russian woman telling me I should come visit her in Turkey.

As I said above, a series of seemly good but bad decisions has me at my parents house, I dropped my newest smartphone that will cost me $158 to fix and haven't been able to donate Plasma for two months because the last time they took about 200cc's of blood on accident (the machine did it). So that's no different than donating blood, you can only do that roughly twice a year. They took 200cc so I had to build that back up again, it takes 60 or so days.

You could say this is "Murphy's Law" but really this goes back to two, maybe three decisions.

1) When flushed with my largess, I should have done the intelligent thing which would be to pay off all debts. Including the car, I had maybe $13,000 total in debt, when I had $62,000 in cash.

That would have eliminated all debts, which would have boosted my credit score. When I bought the car, it didn't require a co-signer which was a relief myFICO score was 620 which resulted in a 11.4% interest rate for 60 months. By paying that and my school debt, I am positive my score would be at least 700.

This also would have meant that returning back to work at Pep Boys just became that much less important without any debt to service.

2) I would have gone to Turkey with nothing to lose and everything to gain. That woman and me didn't work, I might not have had a job but I wouldn't be in debt either and flushed with money. With no car payments to make, I would have said at least $10,000. Meaning when the transmission took a dump, spending $1,500 would haven't meant less because at the time that happen, I was down to my last $5,000.

3) I wouldn't have been in Riverside, CA where I got into an accident with my car and ultimately lost it to the bank with only 8 payments left!

So that's why I can't simply blame "Murphy's Law" for the things that happen since then. Since our society runs on money, having more of it is a good thing, having less means you're options are limited. Since I lived at home during this and since that time, there was no excuse not to do what I should have done with was paying off debt.

Understanding why you are here is the first step in figuring how to get out of it.

Sure I can make more money at a job, that's the benefit. But what are the negatives?

For one the reality is LA is a car based city. Its really not practical to use public transit unless you can ride maybe two buses max and takes less than an hour to get to work. Anything more, especially at min wage becomes really unattractive at this point. Especially since the Government has basically done NOTHING to fix the problem, settling for a "Market Solution" to a simple problem of too much debt in the system.

Just as health care reform is a market based solution. The way to solve the problem is eliminate the market from health care as so many other 1st world countries have done, especially Switzerland since they tried it our way first.... This is possible because so many Americans have limited knowledge of what happens outside of our boarders which is why lies like "They hate us for our lifestyle and freedom" are easily sold to most Americans. The War On Terror is getting harder to sell because of the internet having such a large impact on our lives, much more so than in 2001, that when John Kerry talks about Russia invading Crimea is against international law, when the US did just that when it invaded Iraq, it makes him look stupid and why it fell so flat.

Once we start making the right decisions and not letting markets decide everything we'll be on the right path in the US, but by then it might be too late as some things could be irreversible, yes I am talking about the climate.

Solar Power will become mass adopted in the next decade as prices of panels come down, but by waiting for China to prefect how to make panels cheaply we have likely baked in any changes to our ecosystem and slowed down the adoption of electric cars.

That is what is wrong with "market based solutions".

That is bit off-topic but again needs to be said because not everything can be blamed on happenstance. Many people are active participants in their own demise/failures.


I do agree with DJ4money. Basically in no short terms sometimes it is based on your birth. If you have been a result of an out-of-wedlock lower class family, then most likely you will do the same thing. I was thinking about this from colleagues at my job who went through the rise of getting above that level and doing better for themselves. I guess in my case, I had a decent middle class family (yes; even as minority) and went to decent university. I think the biggest issue for me not going back abroad is that I want to have a job setup for me when I get to the location or area I want to work and live. Latin America is definitely a good place for an adventurer who wants to try a new idea and try to be successful. I believe me and some other members who are doing okay have problems with is that to take a chance to live in a place and somehow it does not work out, it might be hurtful financially.

In a similar situation abroad, I could have tried to moved to another country in Europe and established a business which did not have bad startup costs and did English teaching to stay in the country. I would not like to do teaching forever but something where you can do something where you can make some money. After my contract ended in Europe, it was not difficult to get interviews but the problem with residency permit (Visa) so there are not so many options to stay in the country.

Currently, though I have a decent paying job, the issue going abroad (beyond just traveling) is how can I get here and what are my options. Since, I work in technology, I could either try to do a business in South America or Central America. Possibly Asia, if I was adventurous in Europe, it would have to be in Eastern Europe but then would idea would I have for a business? So, I look into getting contracted work which might work in another country but it requires checks by the govt and the time to get that is not easy.

HA has helped get to know certain people but really most of the ideas were the options I researched myself. I think if there were better sections to actually push people to get work beyond English teaching as an example to doing other types of businesses, I think it would be better but really I have not seen it in the last 5 plus years I have been on the website when I graduated from school.

I am not sure of Winston's explanation of why things happen to people but most members who have not lived abroad for a time, might have financial concerns and/or are just plain scared of the unknown.
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Postby djfourmoney » Fri Apr 04, 2014 8:46 pm

momopi wrote:
Winston wrote:But modern life is also way over-complicated. There are just too many things you have to take care of, more than the human brain can remember. Even trying to make a to do list of everything you have to do would be a tedious task in itself. So each day, you can only remember a few things. Plus everything takes longer than you expect too, at least twice as long, because every task involves multiple steps and multiple decisions, if done right.
You only have 24 hours in a day, and half of that is spent sleeping, eating, cooking, cleaning and doing housework and errands. So that leaves you 12 hours, but you gotta use some of that to rest too. You can't be working every minute. So if you rest 3 hours a day, that leaves you 9 hours left to do whatever it is you want for the day. And if you have a job, that takes up the whole 9 hours, leaving you ZERO time left.


Out-source your errands. Google mealku and see if it's avail in LV, if not you could start your own local exchange (might be a profitable venture).



djfourmoney wrote: Solar Power will become mass adopted in the next decade as prices of panels come down, but by waiting for China to prefect how to make panels cheaply we have likely baked in any changes to our ecosystem and slowed down the adoption of electric cars.
That is what is wrong with "market based solutions".


Electric (and solar) power is heavily affected by regulations, subsidies, and politics. i.e. Edison must petition the Utility Commission for rate increases.


True, I wasn't trying to simplify it. The truth is demand would have pushed things further along politically.
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Postby djfourmoney » Fri Apr 04, 2014 9:04 pm

aozora13 wrote:
djfourmoney wrote:I agree with you Winston, but let me offer a slightly different look.

Much of what happens is not so much about Murphy's Law, Law(s) of Attraction and other sorts of non-scientific based phenomena. It actually is little things that grow into much larger, uncontrollable situations.

Example -

You pretty much mimic what you know best. IE, if your parents are middle class, its likely you'll be middle class. Just as people that are born poor often stay that way. Its doing what will not cause poverty to start with that breaks the cycle of so-called bad luck which is actually a series of small but poor decisions that end up impacting long term goals.

What do poor people do?

1) They tend to have children at a young age
2) They tend to not value education
3) They are attacked for not doing what others consider "normal"

So if its normal to have a child at 16, if its normal to ditch school all the time and if its normal to do these things because your friends do it, guess what you end up in the same position your parents were in because they made the exact same mistakes.

The cycle of poverty continues, until one person takes all the above seriously. Education is the key to marketable skills that allow you to live outside the hood. Children are not suppose to be an unintended part of life. Nothing is planned perfectly but there is nothing surprising about having a child.

Staying away from people that will undermine you is likely the most important part because peer pressure has ramifications that are hard to fathom.

Most people on here are ultra negative is linked to their disappointing life up to this point. They don't have as much money as they thought they might have when they were in elementary school. They aren't doing the job they wanted the most as a child. This is because while people love to ask you what you wanna be, they hardly explain to you what exactly you need to do to reach your goal. Likely because they never reached their goals either and its a deterrent when it doesn't seem like it.

This is why the internet is more important than ever but is used more as a form of entertainment than a tool to learn useful information or skills.

95% of the threads in the General Forum are about negative aspects of Western Culture. When these people are challenged on their negativity, somebody wants to play armchair psychologist and say it's natural to allow people to vent their anger. But what happens after anger? Nothing is what happens, absolutely NOTHING.

How many times have I suggested two or three different methods to make some extra money? How many people are doing that? What do they do otherwise? They attack me for not completing my own task. Then I have to remind them that at one point I had more money than the majority of people make in a year in cash available to me, I was in a hostel in Frankfurt, Germany with a good looking Russian woman telling me I should come visit her in Turkey.

As I said above, a series of seemly good but bad decisions has me at my parents house, I dropped my newest smartphone that will cost me $158 to fix and haven't been able to donate Plasma for two months because the last time they took about 200cc's of blood on accident (the machine did it). So that's no different than donating blood, you can only do that roughly twice a year. They took 200cc so I had to build that back up again, it takes 60 or so days.

You could say this is "Murphy's Law" but really this goes back to two, maybe three decisions.

1) When flushed with my largess, I should have done the intelligent thing which would be to pay off all debts. Including the car, I had maybe $13,000 total in debt, when I had $62,000 in cash.

That would have eliminated all debts, which would have boosted my credit score. When I bought the car, it didn't require a co-signer which was a relief myFICO score was 620 which resulted in a 11.4% interest rate for 60 months. By paying that and my school debt, I am positive my score would be at least 700.

This also would have meant that returning back to work at Pep Boys just became that much less important without any debt to service.

2) I would have gone to Turkey with nothing to lose and everything to gain. That woman and me didn't work, I might not have had a job but I wouldn't be in debt either and flushed with money. With no car payments to make, I would have said at least $10,000. Meaning when the transmission took a dump, spending $1,500 would haven't meant less because at the time that happen, I was down to my last $5,000.

3) I wouldn't have been in Riverside, CA where I got into an accident with my car and ultimately lost it to the bank with only 8 payments left!

So that's why I can't simply blame "Murphy's Law" for the things that happen since then. Since our society runs on money, having more of it is a good thing, having less means you're options are limited. Since I lived at home during this and since that time, there was no excuse not to do what I should have done with was paying off debt.

Understanding why you are here is the first step in figuring how to get out of it.

Sure I can make more money at a job, that's the benefit. But what are the negatives?

For one the reality is LA is a car based city. Its really not practical to use public transit unless you can ride maybe two buses max and takes less than an hour to get to work. Anything more, especially at min wage becomes really unattractive at this point. Especially since the Government has basically done NOTHING to fix the problem, settling for a "Market Solution" to a simple problem of too much debt in the system.

Just as health care reform is a market based solution. The way to solve the problem is eliminate the market from health care as so many other 1st world countries have done, especially Switzerland since they tried it our way first.... This is possible because so many Americans have limited knowledge of what happens outside of our boarders which is why lies like "They hate us for our lifestyle and freedom" are easily sold to most Americans. The War On Terror is getting harder to sell because of the internet having such a large impact on our lives, much more so than in 2001, that when John Kerry talks about Russia invading Crimea is against international law, when the US did just that when it invaded Iraq, it makes him look stupid and why it fell so flat.

Once we start making the right decisions and not letting markets decide everything we'll be on the right path in the US, but by then it might be too late as some things could be irreversible, yes I am talking about the climate.

Solar Power will become mass adopted in the next decade as prices of panels come down, but by waiting for China to prefect how to make panels cheaply we have likely baked in any changes to our ecosystem and slowed down the adoption of electric cars.

That is what is wrong with "market based solutions".

That is bit off-topic but again needs to be said because not everything can be blamed on happenstance. Many people are active participants in their own demise/failures.


I do agree with DJ4money. Basically in no short terms sometimes it is based on your birth. If you have been a result of an out-of-wedlock lower class family, then most likely you will do the same thing. I was thinking about this from colleagues at my job who went through the rise of getting above that level and doing better for themselves. I guess in my case, I had a decent middle class family (yes; even as minority) and went to decent university. I think the biggest issue for me not going back abroad is that I want to have a job setup for me when I get to the location or area I want to work and live. Latin America is definitely a good place for an adventurer who wants to try a new idea and try to be successful. I believe me and some other members who are doing okay have problems with is that to take a chance to live in a place and somehow it does not work out, it might be hurtful financially.

In a similar situation abroad, I could have tried to moved to another country in Europe and established a business which did not have bad startup costs and did English teaching to stay in the country. I would not like to do teaching forever but something where you can do something where you can make some money. After my contract ended in Europe, it was not difficult to get interviews but the problem with residency permit (Visa) so there are not so many options to stay in the country.

Currently, though I have a decent paying job, the issue going abroad (beyond just traveling) is how can I get here and what are my options. Since, I work in technology, I could either try to do a business in South America or Central America. Possibly Asia, if I was adventurous in Europe, it would have to be in Eastern Europe but then would idea would I have for a business? So, I look into getting contracted work which might work in another country but it requires checks by the govt and the time to get that is not easy.

HA has helped get to know certain people but really most of the ideas were the options I researched myself. I think if there were better sections to actually push people to get work beyond English teaching as an example to doing other types of businesses, I think it would be better but really I have not seen it in the last 5 plus years I have been on the website when I graduated from school.

I am not sure of Winston's explanation of why things happen to people but most members who have not lived abroad for a time, might have financial concerns and/or are just plain scared of the unknown.


But you had an idea before....

You said that IT customer service in Austria was nothing like you were used too in the States. Why do you think Europeans love to come shop in America? Its not so much that their money goes further because of the exchange rate, its because in America the customer is king/queen. That's why American based companies thrive anywhere in the world, its really that simple.

No need to reinvent the wheel, just find a service or company that is willing to sell because of various issues like bad management or the owners are retiring with no ares. If you don't have the money to buy an existing company, find a service or product you will solve problems or pain in the system.

I and others can make all sorts of suggestions but you have to follow through. There is nothing to fear, just leave enough money for a return trip home. What people fear most is failure. Why is there great shame in failure? How many successful people failed before finally hitting pay dirt?

Fewer and fewer people are experiencing failure because if you allow other people to do task for you that you don't do well or can't do, its less likely to fail. I really want my blogs to work and while some of guru's say that visuals are not important, other says it is important and that you should have things like your own URL.

The reason my podcast hasn't gone further than one episode and one video on YouTube is because I lack the REAL funds to do it right from my point of view. At some point I am going to have the bite the bullet and take that risk.

Risk is the biggest issue, we have become a risk averse culture. We don't want to fail and we don't want to take any risk.

At some point the investment in time, money or both HAS TO BE MADE. I am really beating on Brazil and put everything else on the shelf until then mostly, since spending hundreds of dollars would threaten my ability to fund my trip. Some would say the solution is to find a job, but as I said there not many jobs around here that I can get too by bus.

I also don't want to do any mind numbing work because it will cause me to drift off and possibly make mistakes.

I think I am going to focus on selling things. First some stuff I need to get rid of, but from there, stuff I can find on clearance or even in warehouses.

Either way, things have to get done they won't happen themselves, at some point you'll have to take a risk.
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Postby Winston » Sat Apr 05, 2014 1:26 pm

Djfourmoney,
Yeah of course, bad decisions are part of it too. Some of us make a lot of bad decisions and deep down, we have self-destructive habits that we don't realize. A lot of it is subconscious.

But that's not what Murphy's Law is. It may be connected, but that's not what it is. Do you know what Murphy's Law is? We've all experienced it. Or am I the only one here who has? Even Ladislav has told me that he has experienced it frequently.

See many examples of Murphy's Law here:

http://www.murphys-laws.com/murphy/murphy-laws.html
http://www.murphys-laws.com/murphy/murphy-love.html

Basically, we are talking about an INVISIBLE AGENT that purposely tries to make things go wrong and go against us that is NOT explainable by coincidence or randomness.

Please read that again. Some of you seem to not understand what that means. Perhaps it is because some guys are INCAPABLE of believing that there are any mysteries, unknown/unexplained phenomenon, or metaphysical realities. That's a common problem with a lot of guys, especially Atheists. The paranormal and supernatural deals with stuff out of their control, so they refuse to believe in any of it. It does not fit into practical left brained logic either. So every time you talk about it, it goes over their heads.

But I've experienced this invisible agent MANY MANY MANY times. Even Rock has seen it at work in my life and can attest to it. If you've ever seen Snoopy or Charlie Brown, it shows Murphy's Law happening to Charlie Brown all the time. Do you remember? Why is this so hard for some of you to understand? It's even in a cartoon!

Here are some examples in my life of Murphy's Law:

- At an intersection, if I don't know which way to turn, and I take a guess, I make the wrong turn 90 percent of the time. A 50/50 chance theoretically should not be wrong 90 percent of the time. Therefore, it cannot be explained by chance alone. I don't know why Atheists are stumped by this and cannot deal with it.

- In the Philippines, when I sit in a jeepney with Dianne, the hottest and cutest girls always come on board, because I cannot talk to them or hit on them. But when I'm alone, they don't come. When I'm available, they don't come. Only when I'm not available, do they come. This is a common experience, and other guys here have noted it too. Ladislav also experiences this.

The thing is, if it happens a few times, it can be coincidence. But if it happens HUNDREDS of times, then it's a PATTERN, not a coincidence. I don't know why that's beyond a lot of guys, even educated guys.

- Take Astrology for instance. Even Jester has said Astrology cannot be explained by chance alone. Astrology is not 100 percent accurate, but it is not 100 percent chance and coincidence either. There is a definite repeating PATTERN in Astrology. The documented research of Frenchman Michel de Gauquelin proved this. And personal experience proves it too. Why is this totally over the head of many guys, even here? So weird. How can something so obvious to some people be totally over the head of others? And why do so many guys know nothing of metaphysics?

There seems to be two types of guys here:

1. Those who accept that metaphysical realities and other dimensions exist. And that there are supernatural and paranormal events that happen, even in their own life, that cannot be explained by science. They happily embrace the unknown, unexplained and mysterious as something wonderful and intriguing, which makes life more exciting and interesting. They can also cite instances of paranormal phenomenon or miracles in their life that they experienced.

Examples of guys on the forum who fit type #1 are: Mr S, Ladislav, Jamesbond, Jackal, and others.

2. Those who lean toward Atheism and are closed to anything metaphysical or paranormal. They believe that everything in the universe and in reality can be explained by the known laws of science, mundane explanations or chance and probability. They are uncomfortable with other dimensions or metaphysical realities or invisible phenomenon. They have an aversion to the mysterious and unexplained, and blot it out of their heads. It makes them uncomfortable because they cannot see it or control it. They cannot accept the existence of any "invisible agents" outside of their control and perception.

We've all known many guys like this. At least half of Western men are this type, and many forum members here too. In movies about the supernatural or paranormal, they are always the skeptics who think there must be a logical explanation for everything, until they are proven wrong later.

Examples of guys on the forum who fit type #2 are: Momopi, Marklambo, Devil Dog, and others.

Guys of type #2 will not acknowledge something like Murphy's Law, or even Astrology, because it doesn't fit into their paradigm. But the thing is, Murphy's Law is a part of life. We've all experienced it many times in everyday things. See the examples in the links above. So I don't understand why some guys can't accept it. Bad luck happens to all of us. Perhaps some guys don't take it too seriously.

Anyhow, I do know that Murphy's Law exists. We just don't know WHAT it is or what causes it. One of its laws is that "nature sides with the hidden flaw". That's true. We've all experienced that. It happened with the Titanic too.

We've all experienced something like this: If we have it, we don't need it. If we need it at the moment, we don't have it. When you need the cops, they are not around. If you don't need them, then they are around to bother you.

Everyone can attest to such things. They are common experiences that ordinary people will attest to.

So why the hell am I the only guy here who thinks Murphy's Law is real? WTF?! Theoretically everyone should be able to attest to it.

How can something so obvious and simple, as to be put in Snoopy and Charlie Brown, be over all your heads?! WTF?!

There definitely are patterns in life that cannot be explained by chance. Why is this over your heads? Strange. Is it because men do not like the idea of invisible agents outside of their control? If so, how can you guys blot it out of your heads with cognitive dissonance, yet I rail about it all the time? LOL

New Agers would say that Murphy's Law is either due to karma or your negative attitude which manifests psychically in your life as an invisible agent. Maybe so. I don't know. But at least it is real and it does exist. Why do many of you not accept or acknowledge that?

Moreover, regarding coincidences, there are many great minds who say that coincidences do not even exist. For example, physicist David Bohm, a protege of Einstein, termed what he called the "implicate order" stating that coincidences are a higher form of order that the mind cannot perceive. How is it that I am the only guy who knows about stuff like this? Do you guys know nothing of metaphysics? Have you never even read the book "The Holographic Universe"? I thought you guys were truth seekers?

Here's something interesting and spooky:

Long ago several psychics told me that I had twin souls inside me, or other souls in me. Maybe that explains why I always feel that something within me is always countermanding my wishes. For example, I want to leave the US badly, but another part of me wants me to stay, countermanding my wishes. It's like there are two me's. The other is another self, or perhaps an inner demon, that goes against my conscious intentions. So if I want to do one thing, it will want the opposite.

Maybe none of you can relate to this. That's too bad. I would have thought that some of you could.

Most people are not that lucky. They are plagued by many streaks of bad luck. Even successful people have lots of bad luck early on in life. So I expected more sympathy here. Instead, you are all in denial and changing the subject. Maybe I overestimated you. :::::::::: shaking head :::::::::::

Either way, can you guys PLEASE read the links above so that you will at least UNDERSTAND what Murphy's Law is? I'm tired of you guys not getting it and twisting it into something else, like bad decisions or something you can control. You just aren't getting it. So please READ the above links and familiarize yourself with what I mean by Murphy's Law ok?! OK?!

Remember: Denying, dismissing or ignoring Murphy's Law does NOT explain it away. So stop falsely assuming that it does.

Haven't you guys heard of these quotes:

"There are more things in heaven and earth Horatio than are dreamt of in your philosophy." - Hamlet

"The universe is not only stranger than we imagine. It is stranger than we CAN imagine."

Do you understand what these quotes mean? If so, why do you act like arrogant know it alls? Why don't you humble yourselves? Why do you act like there are no mysteries or unexplained phenomenon in life? I don't understand. Can you guys explain sincerely and logically?
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Postby starchild5 » Sat Apr 05, 2014 5:10 pm

Winston wrote:
There does seem to be an invisible force around us that likes to go against our intentions and wishes. It enjoys tripping us and putting obstacles in our path. It enjoys putting temptation before us, and then yanking it away, as if saying "Na na na na na, you can't have it!" It likes to mess up our plans by throwing endless problems in front of us. So trying to move or relocate is like trying to get off Gilligan's Island -- in every episode something goes wrong. I've experienced this too many times consistently, many thousands of times, to the point where I know it can't be due to pure coincidence, chance or randomness.




Yes. There is...Its called the force of darkness...

Everyone Please MUST watch this Video...Can't stress this enough....

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ohx7bSeD5bQ


Super Solder Racheal ..She talks about this force that is manipulating our reality...

I have personally seen this..TRUST ME...I"m from India...and far far away from anything to do with whatever you think would be my motive as Indians are not much into all this...conspiracy etc is the domain of western countries.....

Its the AI...I call it the THING....our whole galaxy is covered with black smoke like THINGY....This THING ..is pulling our entire existence itself backwards....there is NO future ...we all are going backwards...This whole existence itself is going backwards.....

This force of darkness is talked by Aliens to Alec Newald

MUST MUST READ

http://www.bibliotecapleyades.net/vida_ ... versations With Zeena

Quote

"There was indeed a time upon your planet, not so long ago in the context of this history lesson, when a ’force’ came down upon it and did in fact claim it [the Earth] and all upon it as its own. That force--and I know you will find this difficult to accept, Alec [Zeena used my name for the first time]--that force is still among you. It is indeed now a part of all of you, so I suppose you could say it still does own the planet in some way.
"After this force won your planet, it realized it would have a continuous fight on its hands, for you were not as you are now. You were well on your way to enlightenment, with a very strong spiritual base. You were actually almost as strong as this force itself. It had to trick you in order to master you, and while you were down it altered your make-up, your very structure; your DNA, in fact. It crippled you and stunted you, and set you back many thousands of years. It made you into what you are today, which is only a portion of the greatness you can be, for you have not yet even fully recovered. And if that force has its way, you never will!

"That force is known to most as the ’force of darkness’, for it is indeed the enemy of enlightenment. You will please understand that this is a very simplistic description of a most complex entity. Even we do not understand it in its entirety. It is in the air that you breathe and everywhere about you. It has aligned itself to the planet and you. It beats to the pulse of your very planet, for you and the Earth are one and the same. This is one thing your peoples do not seem to comprehend, but you can use this union of the whole to do wondrous things, just as we have.


----------

The invisible force you talk about Winston is the above one..Its real....You have sensed it...Its 100% true...what you are saying...you are right.....
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Postby Winston » Sat Apr 05, 2014 5:28 pm

Wow that Super Soldier Rachel is hot. I've never seen a hot woman as a super soldier or one that talks about this stuff.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ohx7bSeD5bQ

Are these forces she's talking about aka as the Archons?
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Postby starchild5 » Sat Apr 05, 2014 6:13 pm

Winston wrote:Wow that Super Soldier Rachel is hot. I've never seen a hot woman as a super soldier or one that talks about this stuff.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ohx7bSeD5bQ

Are these forces she's talking about aka as the Archons?


Archons are using this force of darkness on humanity and they think they have control over it...but Archons itself are fooled by this force ....

The experiences you had of "Indecisiveness" is created by this Force......Even the Aliens don't understand it fully as explained by the Blue Aliens to Alec Newald....Archons, Reptlians, Greys, Illuminati have "Aligned" with this force. As you have experienced it..This is the most difficult thing that has bothered your life more than the Illuminati itself ...now you will know why as you begin to understand this force...It even fools the Archons to Illuminati itself....

Google Alec Newald Co-Evolution book..Download the PDF..its a very interesting read...What Super Soldier Rachael is saying is 100% correct...I have personally sensed it as an AI (Artificial Intelligence) but this AI does not have electronic parts or need a power source to function to manipulate our reality...This AI does not follow our conventional sense of technology by having electronic parts, power source etc....the way we think an AI should be...but that is the closest we can relate to on what this THING really is....so most call this an AI

Its completely Black in color, smoke like THINGY....that is covering our entire galaxy... ..This force of darkness is literally pulling our entire existence from rocks to sands to plants to ocean to even oxygen and everything in between to himself so to speak...We feel this force through fear...

People are still debating if Aliens exist or not...so you can imagine...how hard will it be for people to understand this invisble force....This requires a minimum understanding that Aliens Exists.......You said Archons and I got it and took it from there...I did not debate on whether Archons exists, no proof, proof cycle of debate that goes around in circles in most of the threads for ever

Aliens are old news...This invisible force is way even above the evolution grade of Aliens....That jeepney thingy of hot girls...I have experienced it 100 of times as well.....its all the handy work of this force of darkness....Its only that humans don't know about it....almost all Aliens that visit our planet know about it...and how much it controls our life...

The Blue Aliens mention that..We need to spread this info about this force to everyone who cares to listen and then take fear & emotions away from our society......This AI feeds on our emotions.....The more obstacles, broken dreams he creates, the more we generate emotions that he feeds on.....

The Murphy Law, Invisible force that is acting on our life 24/7 is exactly to the T...this THING which many call it the Black Goo, AI....
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Postby Winston » Thu Apr 10, 2014 3:08 am

I sent this to my dad explaining why I am six months behind on returning to Taiwan. What do you think? How do you fight against your own mind if it's against you? How do you fight against yourself if there are seemingly "two selves" inside you?

What can you do? Fighting your mind is like hell, it's one of the hardest things. If you've never experienced it, you don't understand. How come other people are lucky to be unified in mind, but not me? Geez!

This is one of the productive things I have to do. I was going to do this three months ago. I was also going to answer your emails 30 days ago and other emails. But everything takes so long and I can't get to anything. Too much shit keeps getting in the way. Too many problems block me.

Then it becomes night and I have to to go sleep again. This repeats for many days. What can I do? Life gives us too many things to do and everything takes long to do. And our time and energy are limited. I need to slow down time but I can't.

My schedule is totally messed up too. I was supposed to leave back in August and September. And I wasted the last two years of my life in places I don't thrive in, and I can't get it back. I am so angry and depressed about it everyday that I want to explode.

If you didn't move the house from Bellingham, I would not be here. I could have been in China last year, instead of being stuck again. Everything in my life is bad luck and bad timing. Every day I'm angry and yelling to God and destiny because of that. You can't imagine the anger and frustration I feel. I feel that demons and bad entities are blocking me and trying to mess me up.

I have a very hard time managing time. My own negative demons in my head keep blocking me with excuses and problems. The mind is very hard to control. There are conflicts inside, as though I have two selves inside me. It's VERY hard to fight with your own mind everyday.

When I'm depressed and angry, I like to get revenge on people. It's a way of venting anger.

I told my aunt I would try to help by doing things my way, using my tricks. But I did not make any promises. She does not think about that incident unless I bring it up. I am merely trying to do justice.

Love,
Winston
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