Why do men get married in their twenties?

[fightforlove]

Everyone has their own opinion/philosophy on the right age for a man to get hitched and settle down...

One friend of mine thinks that if you're going to marry, you should do it by your 21st birthday, because after that its like trying to combine 2 parts whose glue has already cured. Many other people stress that you should wait until at least 30 and have your career, finances, and life all figured out. Still, some other people claim that there is a "sweet spot" around 26-28 and that if you marry before or after this window, you're more likely to have a dissapointing or failed marriage.

Most of us get married in our twenties; the average American male gets married at 29. But whether it's 21 or 29, this got me thinking: even if it is the late 20s, this is still before men reach their peak desireability. It has been pretty well documented that the dating game favors women in the 20s and then shifts in favor of men during the 30s (if you're single then), yet most men chop themselves off from this peak-value era by getting married before 30.

Meanwhile, women take advantage of their peak-value years and play the field all through their 20s and then settle down with a husband-material man just before they begin their decline.

So, why don't men wait longer to marry and then cash in on their most desireable years also?

[eurobrat]

...

[Jester]

Life is full of hard decisions for you monogamists! Why not marry early like Romeo and Juiet, and then again at age 30?

Seriously (and to avoid threadjacking!), early is fine if you have supportive parents and they approve of the marriage. And yes the young love thing will feel like heaven.

If it's not like that, if your parents are not backing you up, giving you a place to live, etc, then later is better. Several years on into an established career.

But you have to guard your heart till then.

[Dragon]

They say men only fall in love 3 times in their lives. Well 2/3 of that is done already for me, both times disasters. I'm only in my early 20s and I have only one more chance to go, so I'm not going to waste it!

Seriously though, getting married early and in the US is a disaster. Most guys usually don't know what they're doing, so they follow the usual path of college, job, family, retirement. That may have been fine and dandy 50 years ago, but AW today are not worth it now. There is girlfriend material and then there is wife material. If the only thing a girl has to offer is her looks (which will fade fast), then you're marrying for the wrong reasons. You should probably never marry a
career woman. That's just bad news and guys are willing to tolerate it, which is sad.

Remember a wife should be a wife, not a co-worker.

[RobinHood]

[quote="fightforlove"]Everyone has their own opinion/philosophy on the right age for a man to get hitched and settle down...

One friend of mine thinks that if you're going to marry, you should do it by your 21st birthday, because after that its like trying to combine 2 parts whose glue has already cured. Many other people stress that you should wait until at least 30 and have your career, finances, and life all figured out. Still, some other people claim that there is a "sweet spot" around 26-28 and that if you marry before or after this window, you're more likely to have a dissapointing or failed marriage.

Most of us get married in our twenties; the average American male gets married at 29. But whether it's 21 or 29, this got me thinking: even if it is the late 20s, this is still before men reach their peak desireability. It has been pretty well documented that the dating game favors women in the 20s and then shifts in favor of men during the 30s (if you're single then), yet most men chop themselves off from this peak-value era by getting married before 30.


I don't think the dating game ever favours men in the western world. Men generally age better than women and a man in his 30s is more mature than his 20s counterpart, but don't ever think you have the upper hand with a western woman. Find a foreign woman and things are more in your favour.

As to why men marry in their 20s, it's because since childhood men are conditioned into the belief that "marriage" is their main aim in life and as such spend their 20s pursing this goal. They then spend their 30s regretting this decision and getting divorced!

[pete98146]

I see this happening all the time and it usually happens more to women than men but I've seen men succumb to this phenomenon as well.

Due to PERCEIVED peer pressure both men and women fall in love with the idea of getting married moreso than falling in love with their spouses. Maybe it's because their parents married early or it's PERCEIVED that once you get married all of your problems will go away but whatever reason it happens frequently often times with disasterous results.

Men shouldn't get marred until their mid 30s.

[Andrewww]

They say men only fall in love 3 times in their lives. Well 2/3 of that is done already for me, both times disasters. I'm only in my early 20s and I have only one more chance to go, so I'm not going to waste it!

Seriously though, getting married early and in the US is a disaster. Most guys usually don't know what they're doing, so they follow the usual path of college, job, family, retirement. That may have been fine and dandy 50 years ago, but AW today are not worth it now. There is girlfriend material and then there is wife material. If the only thing a girl has to offer is her looks (which will fade fast), then you're marrying for the wrong reasons. You should probably never marry a
career woman. That's just bad news and guys are willing to tolerate it, which is sad.

Remember a wife should be a wife, not a co-worker.

Couldn't have said it better myself.
Marrying in your 20s is fine as long as you find a woman that is willing to make sacrifices for you. If you marry purely because of physical attraction you're a moron. If you marry a woman that has had 10-20 boyfriends you're a double moron. If you marry a woman who needs a man to fund her university degrees you're a triple moron.

[djfourmoney]

Just use science...

Its been proven, women complain men in their early to mid 20's lack maturity. There outliers but generally the rule is men 21-28 are sowing oats.

Women are there most attractive from age 16 to roughly age 23. Again this is proven as there is a documentary called Are All Men Pedophiles? - http://areallmenpedophiles.com/dvd/ As in the trailer most modeling agencies are looking for 16 year olds to start their careers. Just as most competitive female swimmers are under 21 as well and often peak in the 16-18 age range.

The reasons are women are their close to lightest weight at that age but are mature enough to have children (physically). This is why men are attracted to women as young as 16-17-18, its not in your head its biological, you can't help it.

What's worst is media understand this and plays into your pedophilia if you wanna call it that. They often depict high school age women as femme-fatales (remember the movie The Crush? or American Beauty? or even Girl Next Door?) . Where do you think the term "Dirty Old Man" comes from?

Anyway, women should be looking at men 28-32 (maybe down to 35) if they are looking to get married and have children. These men are ready to settle down, as one researcher found, men often are ready once they figure out they are the oldest person in the room when going to social gatherings like bars or nightclubs, where the majority of patrons are early to mid 20's.

Sure there are bars and clubs that attract an older female crowd, but as I have said several times already; Men just aren't interested in women their age (or older) and its social pressure that makes men accept older women in the declining years of their attractiveness and fertility.

I say men talk themselves into liking older women and there some logical reasons to do this. They tend to be more comfortable with their bodies (5-10 lbs overweight doesn't seem to bother them), they are not longer interested in what people think (for the most part). I say about half of them are undecided about having children, which is why under normal circumstances the US should be in the middle of talking about a declining birth rate among women in the America. The truth is, we are not having that discussion for several reasons. I'll give one of them; We're a multicultural society, singling out the dominant culture and saying they are in decline, would give the appearance of White people concerned about giving up their dominant position in society. In which the general reply from everybody not White would say "Haven't you ruled long enough???" Try telling this the morons on Stormfront.

Older women like to f**k, less games being played and that's why Cougars are I wouldn't say popular but have increased market share.

So to recap:

Men should likely wait until late 20's, early to mid 30's. Women (though they aren't listening and get incensed about it) should use their best years (18-23) to find a man in his late 20's, early to mid 30's. After 25 they are in the beginning of a decline, but its a slow and steady decline so they won't see it until about age 30 and if they aren't paying attention to fertility either until that time, they'll find 88% of the eggs they were born with are gone - http://myfuturebaby.com/fertility-clock ... ity-clock/

[Andrewww]

I disagree with the statement that men lack maturity. I find that it's the other way around: Western women between 20 and 30 years old lack maturity in all aspects of life. They don't know how to cook, they're locked in their cellphones 24/7, they would rather gossip with their girlfriends instead of doing something productive, they think they're some kind of princess and that the world spins around them. Bottom line is that I wouldn't trust my dog with a western woman, having children with them would be madness.

[Teal Lantern]

Everyone has their own opinion/philosophy on the right age for a man to get hitched and settle down...

One friend of mine thinks that if you're going to marry, you should do it by your 21st birthday, because after that its like trying to combine 2 parts whose glue has already cured. Many other people stress that you should wait until at least 30 and have your career, finances, and life all figured out. Still, some other people claim that there is a "sweet spot" around 26-28 and that if you marry before or after this window, you're more likely to have a dissapointing or failed marriage.

Most of us get married in our twenties; the average American male gets married at 29. But whether it's 21 or 29, this got me thinking: even if it is the late 20s, this is still before men reach their peak desireability. It has been pretty well documented that the dating game favors women in the 20s and then shifts in favor of men during the 30s (if you're single then), yet most men chop themselves off from this peak-value era by getting married before 30.

Meanwhile, women take advantage of their peak-value years and play the field all through their 20s and then settle down with a husband-material man just before they begin their decline.

So, why don't men wait longer to marry and then cash in on their most desireable years also?

Most men who get married early succumb to a combination of peer pressure, propaganda, guilt, fear, and their own horniness.

If a woman can catch the man before he reaches his peak earning years, she can guilt him into staying (I took you when you had nothing) or, at least cash in (married long enough to split everything, even his future earnings because "we built this together"). This is why men are pressured to marry before they figure this out.

A man not caught in his early years might wise up enough not to bother at all or at least not settle for the local low quality.

[djfourmoney]

I disagree with the statement that men lack maturity. I find that it's the other way around: Western women between 20 and 30 years old lack maturity in all aspects of life. They don't know how to cook, they're locked in their cellphones 24/7, they would rather gossip with their girlfriends instead of doing something productive, they think they're some kind of princess and that the world spins around them. Bottom line is that I wouldn't trust my dog with a western woman, having children with them would be madness.

So you're saying the lack of knowing how to cook and being consumed by their smart phones are a sign of a lack of maturity and an extension of childhood? So when the largest growing market for 7th generation game consoles are men over 30? Average buyer of the new Ford Focus ST and its rivals in the market the VW GT1 (7th generation available soon) is 46? Other C segment cars with loud paint (not the GTI save for Red) and turbocharged engines, some would say those are signed men are extending adolescence....

The tradition of female teenagers being babysitters is still commonplace, how many tragedies have you heard about? What about the Female Pedophiles having sex with teenage men? Now for lots of reasons, its not seen nor treated as a net negative to young men (boys) because men do think about sex quite a bit at 15-18 years old. have the hardest, best erections and have yet to experience a mature relationship.

I did SAY some young men are ready for LTR at age twenty but that totally depends on his success with the opposite sex in high school and whether its common in his community for couples to be young. Employment and Income are paramount to a Man deciding he wants to start a family. A generation ago when you could walk off your high school campus and walk right into a GM, Chrysler or Ford job that paid well into the teens and offered job security, you're free to make decisions like should I marry Becky Sue or not.

nytimes.com/2012/02/18/us/for-women-under-30-most-births-occur-outside-marriage.html?pagewanted=all

The forces rearranging the family are as diverse as globalization and the pill. Liberal analysts argue that shrinking paychecks have thinned the ranks of marriageable men, while conservatives often say that the sexual revolution reduced the incentive to wed and that safety net programs discourage marriage.

I would say its a little bit of both.

The numbers don't support an all or nothing look at things. Okay 50% divorce, that can be seen as half empty or half full. If 70-80% of women are obese. That means the overall number of decent available women far outnumbers the amount of available men. So while the All or Nothing is strictly hyperbole it just means you'll have to work much harder to find that woman in America. The competition is tremendous and shouldn't underestimated.

As my glass trainer told me "Work Smarter, Not Harder". So do you want to hunt where the men outnumber the available women and the women are complaining that can't be the case or do you want to hunt where there is abundance? This is classic market scarcity drives up the cost (inflation) in this case it drive up the value of pu**y. It doesn't help when your first date is a $50 a plate dinner and you keep investing in things designed to keep you in America limiting your hunting ability abroad. I can't blame you, you have been told this is what you need to do to get laid, as men usually decide if a woman is relationship material after having sex with her. Women understand its really the only valuable thing they have, so despite the sexual revolution, they give it out to douche bags and punish the regular guy.

At the end of the day, spending time to complain about AW is largely like "spanking the monkey", all that work for largely nothing but a empty feeling of pleasure.

[RobinHood]

Exactly - you have woman "inflation" in the west, you have too much money (men) chasing too few goods (attractive females). The odds are not in your favour for finding an attractive woman...

Even if you do find an attractive western woman, this is really when your problems begin as she knows that if you are not doing as she says she can quite easily get another man with money / looks.

My advice to all you younger men on here is to forget about being with a western woman as she will never be the type of woman that you want.

Instead of chasing average western women, put your energyinto finding a foreign woman. Not saying all foreign woman are great, because they are not, but your chances of finding a woman with a better attitude and someone who will treat you nice are so much higher.

3 of my friends are now with foreign women - each one has said they are never going back to an English woman. Enough said.

[skateboardstephen]

Exactly - you have woman "inflation" in the west, you have too much money (men) chasing too few goods (attractive females). The odds are not in your favour for finding an attractive woman...

Even if you do find an attractive western woman, this is really when your problems begin as she knows that if you are not doing as she says she can quite easily get another man with money / looks.

My advice to all you younger men on here is to forget about being with a western woman as she will never be the type of woman that you want.

Instead of chasing average western women, put your energyinto finding a foreign woman. Not saying all foreign woman are great, because they are not, but your chances of finding a woman with a better attitude and someone who will treat you nice are so much higher.

3 of my friends are now with foreign women - each one has said they are never going back to an English woman. Enough said.

+1 couldn't have said it better myself

[skateboardstephen]

I disagree with the statement that men lack maturity. I find that it's the other way around: Western women between 20 and 30 years old lack maturity in all aspects of life. They don't know how to cook, they're locked in their cellphones 24/7, they would rather gossip with their girlfriends instead of doing something productive, they think they're some kind of princess and that the world spins around them. Bottom line is that I wouldn't trust my dog with a western woman, having children with them would be madness.

So you're saying the lack of knowing how to cook and being consumed by their smart phones are a sign of a lack of maturity and an extension of childhood? So when the largest growing market for 7th generation game consoles are men over 30? Average buyer of the new Ford Focus ST and its rivals in the market the VW GT1 (7th generation available soon) is 46? Other C segment cars with loud paint (not the GTI save for Red) and turbocharged engines, some would say those are signed men are extending adolescence....

The tradition of female teenagers being babysitters is still commonplace, how many tragedies have you heard about? What about the Female Pedophiles having sex with teenage men? Now for lots of reasons, its not seen nor treated as a net negative to young men (boys) because men do think about sex quite a bit at 15-18 years old. have the hardest, best erections and have yet to experience a mature relationship.

I did SAY some young men are ready for LTR at age twenty but that totally depends on his success with the opposite sex in high school and whether its common in his community for couples to be young. Employment and Income are paramount to a Man deciding he wants to start a family. A generation ago when you could walk off your high school campus and walk right into a GM, Chrysler or Ford job that paid well into the teens and offered job security, you're free to make decisions like should I marry Becky Sue or not.

nytimes.com/2012/02/18/us/for-women-under-30-most-births-occur-outside-marriage.html?pagewanted=all

The forces rearranging the family are as diverse as globalization and the pill. Liberal analysts argue that shrinking paychecks have thinned the ranks of marriageable men, while conservatives often say that the sexual revolution reduced the incentive to wed and that safety net programs discourage marriage.

I would say its a little bit of both.

The numbers don't support an all or nothing look at things. Okay 50% divorce, that can be seen as half empty or half full. If 70-80% of women are obese. That means the overall number of decent available women far outnumbers the amount of available men. So while the All or Nothing is strictly hyperbole it just means you'll have to work much harder to find that woman in America. The competition is tremendous and shouldn't underestimated.

As my glass trainer told me "Work Smarter, Not Harder". So do you want to hunt where the men outnumber the available women and the women are complaining that can't be the case or do you want to hunt where there is abundance? This is classic market scarcity drives up the cost (inflation) in this case it drive up the value of pu**y. It doesn't help when your first date is a $50 a plate dinner and you keep investing in things designed to keep you in America limiting your hunting ability abroad. I can't blame you, you have been told this is what you need to do to get laid, as men usually decide if a woman is relationship material after having sex with her. Women understand its really the only valuable thing they have, so despite the sexual revolution, they give it out to douche bags and punish the regular guy.

At the end of the day, spending time to complain about AW is largely like "spanking the monkey", all that work for largely nothing but a empty feeling of pleasure.

wow just wow one of the greatest post i have read here in a while.Hit the nail right on the head.A lot of the things men spend money on to get women is ridiculous and it gets you no where but stuck in states with your dick in your hand.

[polya]

They say men only fall in love 3 times in their lives. Well 2/3 of that is done already for me, both times disasters. I'm only in my early 20s and I have only one more chance to go, so I'm not going to waste it!

Seriously though, getting married early and in the US is a disaster. Most guys usually don't know what they're doing, so they follow the usual path of college, job, family, retirement. That may have been fine and dandy 50 years ago, but AW today are not worth it now. There is girlfriend material and then there is wife material. If the only thing a girl has to offer is her looks (which will fade fast), then you're marrying for the wrong reasons. You should probably never marry a
career woman. That's just bad news and guys are willing to tolerate it, which is sad.

Remember a wife should be a wife, not a co-worker.

+1 - I think every marriage to a AW is a ticking bomb, as the AW can kick you out whenever she feels like it.