Poll: Should we have a women's board on this forum?

Post your suggestions and feedback for the forum. You can also report a problem, troubleshoot an issue with forum functionality, or suggest new board topics.

Should we have a women only board on this forum?

Yes. Female members need their own board to post in without being unfairly attacked by women haters.
10
26%
No. Why should they get a ladies only board? If they can't stand the heat, then they shouldn't come here.
28
74%
 
Total votes: 38
Renata
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Post by Renata »

BellaRuth it is a men's forum clearly... it's target audience have been males from it's inception due to those vids Winston shared about his experiences with women aborad, & his arguments that they are better than western women. The only two groups that would be interested in this would be Men' and Foreign women, but only the men showed up because, I'm sure due to Language barriers Happier-abroad did not attract any foreign women.

It's a similar scenario like the TravelGirls site that I joined awhile back ... target audience ended up being mostly escorts, not real women that travel for work/fun.
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BellaRuth
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Post by BellaRuth »

Renata wrote:BellaRuth it is a men's forum clearly... it's target audience have been males from it's inception due to those vids Winston shared about his experiences with women aborad, & his arguments that they are better than western women. The only two groups that would be interested in this would be Men' and Foreign women, but only the men showed up because, I'm sure due to Language barriers Happier-abroad did not attract any foreign women.
It's become tailored to men in particular because they are more likely to be interested in foreign relationships and so find the site through Google, but it's not a 'men's forum'.

If it is supposed to be exclusive to men, it shouldn't read 'Forum Community of Global Daters, Expats and Freethinkers', and should instead read something about men seeking foreign relationships, men's rights, etc.

Currently there's nothing that really says a female interested in these topics should be unwelcome.

Perhaps it would please most of the members if the forum was revised to become more specific to men?
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Post by jboy »

Renata wrote:Winston, Jboy & E irizarry I login everyday or every two days for about 10 mins, plus I've got my hands full at home & with other stuff ... I can't be a Moderator but I am flattered :wink:

I nominate Rock's wife Ginger !!!!!!!!!! :lol: :lol: :twisted:
U've missed the latest happier abroad drama, Winston and Rock seems to have thrown the g-girl to the dogs by making false claims that I am her alter ego lol. See evidences at this thread viewtopic.php?t=19091 , be advised u'll need some popcorn lol. Wait, if their claims are true, in effect u are nominating me as moderator of the women's section and I'm Rock's wife?!!! Lol. Gimme the popcorn bucket, methinks I'll be losing my dinner :D

Any female who wishes to be a moderator or will be appointed as a moderator shall receive this treatment : viewtopic.php?t=18285
Johnny1975
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Post by Johnny1975 »

BellaRuth wrote:I'd just like to point out something that everyone keeps missing.

This isn't actually a forum for men. Nowhere can I see it written, or implied, that this forum is for men. It's a place to discuss how societies and cultures change between countries (to put it broadly), and I only discovered HA existed by searching for that topic.

This has become male-orientated because of Winston's story about discovering people overseas were very different to Americans, leading onto him becoming interested in non-American girls. Then it attracted a number of men also interested in foreign girls. Just because the ratio of males to females is much larger here doesn't mean that it's a male-only board or that it was ever intended to be one.

If a female member, like myself, is interested in discussing the effects of different cultures on personality/beliefs and even the wider themes of gender roles, she has just as much right to be here as anyone else.

Creating a seperate place for female members to discuss these subjects is pandering to the male members here more than the females. We (the females) will concentrate on our designated area and will be much more likely to leave the rest of the board alone. If you don't want interaction with us, realise you'll be more likely to avoid us if we have our own place to go.

I'd also like to suggest the possibility that the majority of whining/feet-stamping does not come from the female members.
I tend to agree. I think what Winston ought to do is get more females coming here, and make sure that it's obvious that they're female (ie have their names in pink, you know, because you all like pink, right?). If the women want to start threads, let them.

As for the whining from the men here, although it does get a bit silly, it is generally justified. But maybe having more women around would make the men smarten up a bit. You have to understand, it's very easy to become whiny when you're surrounded by a bunch of guys who are likely to agree with a lot of what you say. At the same time, the situation is bad, so a certain amount of bit ching is ok I think. Imagine if it was women complaining, it would be a lot worse.
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Cornfed
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Post by Cornfed »

The only valid purpose of this forum is to discuss how Western men can escape the clutches of evil Western elites and their vile female lackeys and to discuss why such an escape is necessary in the first place. There is no point in Western pig females being here as they are too stupid and psychopathic to add anything of value and simply function as pathogens that invade and destroy any form of useful human interaction. If the forum starts catering to Western skanks it will drive off dedicated members. This will cause the scum female members to leave as well, since they will have only been here to attention whore from and plague the men, and the forum will become a dead forum, as have many others before it.

As to this peculiar idea of catering to Western skanks wanting to meet foreign men, this would seem to be at crossed purposes with the general intent of the forum. The main idea seems to be for people to be able to lead the normal life that is denied to them in the West, which would involve Western men meeting real women with the idea of some combination of marriage and p4p. Since Western females are not capable of entering into normal relationships and instead are fully co-opted haremwhores of the elite and their scumbag underclass clients, such an enterprise would have no use for them. It would be best in the long run to just keep Western skanks out.
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Post by Renata »

jboy wrote:
Renata wrote:Winston, Jboy & E irizarry I login everyday or every two days for about 10 mins, plus I've got my hands full at home & with other stuff ... I can't be a Moderator but I am flattered :wink:

I nominate Rock's wife Ginger !!!!!!!!!! :lol: :lol: :twisted:
U've missed the latest happier abroad drama, Winston and Rock seems to have thrown the g-girl to the dogs by making false claims that I am her alter ego lol. See evidences at this thread viewtopic.php?t=19091 , be advised u'll need some popcorn lol. Wait, if their claims are true, in effect u are nominating me as moderator of the women's section and I'm Rock's wife?!!! Lol. Gimme the popcorn bucket, methinks I'll be losing my dinner :D

Any female who wishes to be a moderator or will be appointed as a moderator shall receive this treatment : viewtopic.php?t=18285
LOL and I didn't even get invited to the wedding Jboy ?, I'm appaled ! :lol:
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BellaRuth
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Post by BellaRuth »

Cornfed wrote:The only valid purpose of this forum is to discuss how Western men can escape the clutches of evil Western elites and their vile female lackeys and to discuss why such an escape is necessary in the first place. There is no point in Western pig females being here as they are too stupid and psychopathic to add anything of value and simply function as pathogens that invade and destroy any form of useful human interaction. If the forum starts catering to Western skanks it will drive off dedicated members. This will cause the scum female members to leave as well, since they will have only been here to attention whore from and plague the men, and the forum will become a dead forum, as have many others before it.

As to this peculiar idea of catering to Western skanks wanting to meet foreign men, this would seem to be at crossed purposes with the general intent of the forum. The main idea seems to be for people to be able to lead the normal life that is denied to them in the West, which would involve Western men meeting real women with the idea of some combination of marriage and p4p. Since Western females are not capable of entering into normal relationships and instead are fully co-opted haremwhores of the elite and their scumbag underclass clients, such an enterprise would have no use for them. It would be best in the long run to just keep Western skanks out.
So your views are:

- This forum is solely about Western men leaving their countries, being happier elsewhere, and advising each other on this subject, therefore any female input would be irrelevant (doubly so, as females born in Western countries are all mentally ill and socially inept).

- All female input here would be irrelevant and disruptive, eventually leading to an empty forum.

- The idea of it becoming a place where both men and women can discuss foreign relationships is also irrelevant as Western women are not actually interested in relationships.

If so many of the members here feel this way, perhaps the better solution is to make this board specfically and obviously male-only. Then females who have wandered here by accident believing it is a place to discuss topics of foreign relationships/cultural differences/gender roles would not feel confused by their treatment and the males wouldn't feel violated.

A completely different forum could be set up where both genders are welcomed equally, if Winston is very interested in the idea (I personally think there's an audience for it). That might keep everyone happy.
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Winston
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Post by Winston »

Important clarifications

Some of you guys are getting paranoid and barking up the wrong tree.

So let me make a few clarifications:

- No one said that females are going to be moderating you. Females would be moderating the women/ladies forum, which means that women would be moderating other women, not you. Nothing here would change.

- Mr S, this has nothing to do with catering to western skanks. You are barking up the wrong tree. The type of western females that the women's forum would attract, are not the same as the skanks you hate. There are freethinking honest genuine western females out there too. Remember the female posters here such as BellaRuth and KristinetheStrawberryGirl? They were not skanks. They were quality intelligent female posters, which you can see by their posts. So don't mix up the western skanks you hate with them. Remember that there are exceptions to every general rule.

- If any of you dislike the idea of a women's forum, then it's best that you do not register on it, and in fact, it's best that you ignore its existence altogether. Just pretend it doesn't exist. This is the best thing, since it won't even affect you or anything here in the main forum anyway. So better you just forget all about it. No sense in creating unnecessary conflict.

- I've decided that it will not exactly be a "women's only" forum. It will just be centered and focused more on women's issues, travels, and opinions. Here's why: You see, our forum now is not a "men's only" forum either. It is just based on men's issues with regard to travel, dating, lifestyle, etc. So it wouldn't be fair or consistent to make the other forum a women's only board either.

- Remember that we stand for free speech, and that means free speech for both genders, not just men. If men can seek foreign women, then women can seek foreign men too. It goes both ways. Why shouldn't this movement include both? Try to be fair and reasonable.

- Think about it guys. Put yourself in their shoes. If you were a woman, would you feel welcome here? Think about it, and you will see what I mean. Deep down, you know what I mean and that this makes sense. Try to see both sides for once, not just your own.

- Keep in mind that this has nothing to do with catering to women or making them special. It's about being more inclusive and expanding this movement to allow the other half of the world to participate. You see, our main forum is great, but it's primarily focused on men's issues, and that can and has, alienated women from this forum. So there's nothing wrong with having a forum for the opposite - focused on women's issues and perspectives, while being moderated by a woman as well.

- In short, having a separate forum for the women is the only way to bring them in without invoking personality conflicts, which would be the case if we tried to combine such a forum with this one. That way, the new ladies forum would NOT affect this forum in any way. Nothing will change here, so if anyone doesn't like it, they can simply forget about it. It's that simple. Technically, there's no reason why those opposed to this idea can't just ignore it, since it will NOT affect them. The only reasons they can't are psychological reasons.

- Finally, remember that there are many genuine freethinking women out there too, both foreign and western, who agree with most of what we say as well. They are an invaluable source and perspective. Just look at the posts of Renata and BellaRuth and you will see what I mean. So why alienate them? Why not give them more of a presence and focus? It simply makes sense. So please learn to temper your prejudices and fears regarding this. It will add value here and grow/expand our movement as well.

So please try to see the big picture. Otherwise, just forget this whole thing. No one is forcing you to agree or participate, since nothing here will change because of it. Thanks.

PS - That being said, what colors would be good for the theme of the ladies forum? Light blue, turquoise, pink, purple?
Last edited by Winston on June 18th, 2013, 7:42 pm, edited 3 times in total.
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Renata
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Post by Renata »

Blue or turquoise Winston, like the ocean for this island girl 8)

BellaRuth don't feed cornfed please ... you ladies need to know when to walk away. You won't stand too close or tolerate a rubbish bin if it stinks right ?
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Winston
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Post by Winston »

BellaRuth wrote:
Cornfed wrote:The only valid purpose of this forum is to discuss how Western men can escape the clutches of evil Western elites and their vile female lackeys and to discuss why such an escape is necessary in the first place. There is no point in Western pig females being here as they are too stupid and psychopathic to add anything of value and simply function as pathogens that invade and destroy any form of useful human interaction. If the forum starts catering to Western skanks it will drive off dedicated members. This will cause the scum female members to leave as well, since they will have only been here to attention whore from and plague the men, and the forum will become a dead forum, as have many others before it.

As to this peculiar idea of catering to Western skanks wanting to meet foreign men, this would seem to be at crossed purposes with the general intent of the forum. The main idea seems to be for people to be able to lead the normal life that is denied to them in the West, which would involve Western men meeting real women with the idea of some combination of marriage and p4p. Since Western females are not capable of entering into normal relationships and instead are fully co-opted haremwhores of the elite and their scumbag underclass clients, such an enterprise would have no use for them. It would be best in the long run to just keep Western skanks out.
So your views are:

- This forum is solely about Western men leaving their countries, being happier elsewhere, and advising each other on this subject, therefore any female input would be irrelevant (doubly so, as females born in Western countries are all mentally ill and socially inept).

- All female input here would be irrelevant and disruptive, eventually leading to an empty forum.

- The idea of it becoming a place where both men and women can discuss foreign relationships is also irrelevant as Western women are not actually interested in relationships.

If so many of the members here feel this way, perhaps the better solution is to make this board specfically and obviously male-only. Then females who have wandered here by accident believing it is a place to discuss topics of foreign relationships/cultural differences/gender roles would not feel confused by their treatment and the males wouldn't feel violated.

A completely different forum could be set up where both genders are welcomed equally, if Winston is very interested in the idea (I personally think there's an audience for it). That might keep everyone happy.
Excellent points BellaRuth.

The thing is, if some guys here want to keep this forum a male only forum, all they have to do is completely ignore and forget the other forum, since it will not change or affect anything here, technically. That's what mature adults are supposed to do.

I'm glad we can get a female perspective on this. And it's good to see you back too. :)

The thing is, there is a reason why in sports they separate the guys and girls into different teams and why they use different locker rooms. Even public restrooms are separated into male and female. So why not do that here too?

Yes you are right that this forum has evolved into a male forum about men's issues. Thus, most females will not feel welcome here. You know, everyday we get about 2,000 new visitors from Google search engines. There's no telling how many of them are female and WOULD have registered here if it wasn't a male dominated forum.

However, I don't want to make this officially a male forum either, since that would sound discriminatory. Better to just let things gravitate their own way without labeling them.

The bottom line is that we should stop alienating 50 percent of the population so that this movement can expand and broaden its potential. If anyone has a problem with that, they are free to ignore this issue completely as it will not affect them anyway.
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Winston
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Post by Winston »

Renata wrote:Blue or turquoise Winston, like the ocean for this island girl 8)

BellaRuth don't feed cornfed please ... you ladies need to know when to walk away. You won't stand too close or tolerate a rubbish bin if it stinks right ?
Renata and BellaRuth,
Do you think the women's forum should be another blue and white theme? I'll look for a turquoise theme, but what do you think of these purple and pinkish themes below?

https://www.phpbb.com/customise/db/style/tara/demo/
https://www.phpbb.com/customise/db/styl ... sion/demo/
https://www.phpbb.com/customise/db/styl ... wing/demo/
https://www.phpbb.com/customise/db/styl ... tina/demo/

Nice green themes:
https://www.phpbb.com/customise/db/styl ... wers/demo/
https://www.phpbb.com/customise/db/styl ... ment/demo/

Nice orange themes:
https://www.phpbb.com/customise/db/styl ... olor/demo/
https://www.phpbb.com/customise/db/style/az_retro/demo/

Ok here's a nice turquoise theme, but the graphic at the top sucks and would have to be removed:
https://www.phpbb.com/customise/db/styl ... laas/demo/
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Ghost
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Post by Ghost »

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Last edited by Ghost on January 13th, 2020, 2:33 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Johnny1975
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Post by Johnny1975 »

Rather than having a separate forum, why not have 2 separate index pages, so that it looks like 2 forums, but you can chat on both sections when you join, rather than having to join 2 forums.

Or, have 1 index page, but have a blue section, and a pink section (catered more for women). i.e. everything is white and blue on the index page, but when you scroll down there's a white and pink section.

Again I think it's a bad idea to have women moderators at all. This should be a forum for men, but which women (certain women) can be a part of. This means that if a woman joins and she's no good, she gets the boot. If she's cool, she stays.

This forum should be centered on men. And anything that women talk about should be relevant to men, or should be things that men can relate to. Having women around should be for the purpose of benefiting men. Everything should be centered and catered to us.

So, once the forum has had its facelift, why not try and get women to join, otherwise this whole discussion is moot.
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Post by BellaRuth »

BellaRuth don't feed cornfed please ... you ladies need to know when to walk away. You won't stand too close or tolerate a rubbish bin if it stinks right ?
There was a point to me quoting Cornfed, and if you read what I wrote you'll notice I didn't 'feed' or argue with Cornfed at any point whatsoever. If you look beyond the inflammatory language Cornfed uses, I think his views are similar to the majority of members on here, and it's worth making them crystal clear. That's all I was doing.

I really do think this should be made a men's only forum, clearly and visibly, to help get rid of some of this friction.

At the end of the day we have three reasonable choices:

a) A forum that is open to both men and women. (This will obviously not go down well, as it has already evolved into a men's-only forum).
b) A men's-only forum, made specifically catered to men, attracting more suitable members and repelling those who got here by mistake, like me. If women want to talk about these issues, a new forum should be created completely seperate from Happier Abroad.
c) A men's only-forum as above, but with a seperate section where women can participate, treated as guests.

I think it's only worth discussing b) and c). Therefore this forum needs changes anyway, to ensure that female members are well aware of what it is actually is rather than being confused and excluded once they join.

There is also the benefit that once it becomes a 'real' men's-only forum, more suitable members will be attracted who will want to talk about men's rights, foreign relationships, etc. At present there is a possibility some go elsewhere, thinking that this is a regular expat forum (as I did when I joined, and I've seen many new members did too).

(I'd appreciate it if you didn't patronise me, Renata).
Yes you are right that this forum has evolved into a male forum about men's issues. Thus, most females will not feel welcome here. You know, everyday we get about 2,000 new visitors from Google search engines. There's no telling how many of them are female and WOULD have registered here if it wasn't a male dominated forum.

However, I don't want to make this officially a male forum either, since that would sound discriminatory. Better to just let things gravitate their own way without labeling them.
I understand, but if this remains a male-only forum in everything but name, it's being held back from functioning as well as it could. I think it needs to be made crystal-clear what this forum is really about in order to stop the confusion. At the moment your website comes up very easily in searches related to emmigration, expats, moving abroad- I am here because I typed in 'happier abroad' to search for a survey I read about people moving overseas and jumped right in to introduce myself, thinking I'd get advice about travelling. So many people come here, register, and then realise it's a different place than advertised. Some adapt and enjoy it anyway, others (especially females) end up in a world of confusion, causing havoc with the men here who think they have ulterior motives.

As for the colours for the proposed women's area, I don't mind at all.
Western women have every reason to be Happy at Home. Being Happier Abroad is strictly a man's thing.
Ghost- as a Western woman I strongly disagree. I'd love to elaborate on this, so perhaps once I find an appropriate place to do so, we can talk about it. Some women are just as tired with these issues as men are.
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Winston
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Post by Winston »

Hey I found a great pink theme for the ladies forum! Check it out!

http://demo.phpbb3styles.net/Pinkie

What do you all think?
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