Filipina Woman Here

[Caveat Emptor]

You can consume the deposit you’ve made before you leave the rented premises. However, it is impossible for you to get the change for the PHP9000 after deducting your last month’s rent because she has no means to pay you. Don’t be afraid about the loan sharks. These people won’t hurt you because you are not the debtor. I understand that you feel sorry for your landlady but that is beside the point. If she won’t allow you to leave the premises or won’t allow you to consume the deposit, you may seek assistance from the Barangay officials of the place where the house is located.


I am confident that she will let you use the deposit as payment for your last month’s stay in the house. She is not discussing this concern with you because she does not want to loose you as her lessee because you’re paying her on time. Don’t fall into her emotional blackmail tactics. Filipinos have the gift of employing emotional blackmail to appeal their financial state to unsuspecting foreigners. Better find a place where the owner is financially stable for less complicated transactions. Tell her to look for possible lessee of the place as early as now and make sure that she knows your intention of leaving by the end of the month. Don’t be swayed by her plea. It would get worst in the future you’ll see. Just my two cents worth.

W: Well she is a good person. I hope you're right. Are you sure the Barangay would ever side with a foreigner? A friend of mine told me that they see all foreigners are preying on the weak in their town and are not sympathetic toward them.

But I should say that the officials there tend to treat me pretty well in the past, better than the white foreigners it seems, perhaps cause I'm asian.

How do locals usually handle these situations?

Do you live in the US or the PI now?

I live in the Philippines. I never been out of the country to live abroad. The Barangay officials would most certainly help you out. The laws apply to Filipinos and foreigners alike so you need be doubtful of that. They are only discriminatory against suspected sex offenders so cast your worries behind.

[gmm567]

hey sorry ,if you were offended by my post. You've got good insights into things and it's nice to have you here. I'll definitely have to re-read this thread when I've got the time,but let me just say that you seem to be some one who will make a nice contribution to this forum.

[Caveat Emptor]

hey sorry ,if you were offended by my post. You've got good insights into things and it's nice to have you here. I'll definitely have to re-read this thread when I've got the time,but let me just say that you seem to be some one who will make a nice contribution to this forum.

It's okay. I believe I already made a statement in this forum worthy of respect anyhow. Apology accepted and thank you.

Grazee

[ladislav]

Welcome to the site. It is very refreshing to have someone like yourself here. Hope your advice from your perspective will be helpful to all. Do keep in mind however, that in this forum we tell the truth and often people (newbies)get offended. Like when someone comes back from Russia and he got beat up there or robbed, he is going to post about it. He is going to talk about Russian criminals. No Russian will get offended. No one is afraid to lose face here. If we think that in certain countries there is a high percentage of some very negative phenomenon- such as drugs and murder in South Africa, for example, we will post warning people about South Africa being a dangerous place.

If we think Americans act stupid somewhere, we will point it out.
If we think Filipinos or Japanese act unfairly and stupid, we will rebuke it here.
No political correctness here.

Also, we do not blame victims here. Sure, people need to be more careful but it does not justify the terrible acts of cheaters, criminals and swindlers that we come in contact with.

People here are from different cultures and we all bring different cultural ways of dealing with each other so, it is not for the thin-skinned. If you can handle the truth, you will benefit from this site and vice versa.

As far as your Philippine background, of course, I cannot teach you about the Philippines and you should teach us if you wish. However, we do have an outsider's perspective that is also unique that we can share with you. For example, you probably do not know what it is like to be one of white race in the Philippines. Or you do not know what it is like to be a man there. So, even if you are a Filipina, you may learn about your country here as seen through foreign or male eyes.

Anyway, welcome!

[Caveat Emptor]

Welcome to the site. It is very refreshing to have someone like yourself here. Hope your advice from your perspective will be helpful to all. Do keep in mind however, that in this forum we tell the truth and often people (newbies)get offended. Like when someone comes back from Russia and he got beat up there or robbed, he is going to post about it. He is going to talk about Russian criminals. No Russian will get offended. No one is afraid to lose face here. If we think that in certain countries there is a high percentage of some very negative phenomenon- such as drugs and murder in South Africa, for example, we will post warning people about South Africa being a dangerous place.

If we think Americans act stupid somewhere, we will point it out.
If we think Filipinos or Japanese act unfairly and stupid, we will rebuke it here.
No political correctness here.

Also, we do not blame victims here. Sure, people need to be more careful but it does not justify the terrible acts of cheaters, criminals and swindlers that we come in contact with.

People here are from different cultures and we all bring different cultural ways of dealing with each other so, it is not for the thin-skinned. If you can handle the truth, you will benefit from this site and vice versa.

As far as your Philippine background, of course, I cannot teach you about the Philippines and you should teach us if you wish. However, we do have an outsider's perspective that is also unique that we can share with you. For example, you probably do not know what it is like to be one of white race in the Philippines. Or you do not know what it is like to be a man there. So, even if you are a Filipina, you may learn about your country here as seen through foreign or male eyes.

Anyway, welcome!

Thank you for the lengthy welcome spiel that you have written for me, ladislav. I was not offended because of the member’s criticisms regarding my country. I was offended because the attack was delivered against me as a person and a possible contributor in this forum.

I have been impartial every time that I am giving my opinions here. I discuss with you the advantages and disadvantages of finding a Filipina partner and living in the Philippines. This issue is no longer new to me because this has been the subject of numerous discussions in a different forum that I was privileged to be moderating. I don't care if you say something bad against my country or my people if you can back them up with substance and proofs.

I just want to participate in the discussion and be of service to those who wish to visit my country and help them understand my culture. I can perfectly understand your concern and I am trying to be sensitive to your opinions and feelings at the same time. I hope that you would extend to me the same courtesy as I have given you. I intend to do no harm to everyone. If I sound to be argumentative sometimes, I assure you that I don’t intend to challenge anyone to written war game.

Thanks a lot!

[gmm567]

Isn't it amazing how defensive we can all get (men and women alike) . What's wrong with looking for a date?

[Caveat Emptor]

Isn't it amazing how defensive we can all get (men and women alike) . What's wrong with looking for a date?

One is being defensive because you make an assumption that one is looking for a date. Evidently, the one is not interested and has more things in mind than getting a date. Well, I could only guess that the person making the assumption does not have basis for anything other than hearsay and unfounded speculations. There is nothing wrong if one looks for a date. What is wrong is putting words to someone's mouth as if he has said it and it's his intention. One has said his piece and hopes it will stop from here. Get it?

[Winston]

Generally, Filipinas find foreigners handsome because they have pointed nose, white skin, different eye colors, well built and taller than most Filipino men. We Filipina, including me, find foreigners attractive physically. They would imagine having children with foreign physical features. If they tell you are handsome, you probably are. The money comes into play only after she knew that you have plenty of them. You will be then tagged as rich and handsome. You’re advisor has a point also; being charismatic, sweet and kind appeals to Filipinas as well. Its how you make the Filipina feel beautiful which makes her reciprocates that kind of physical adoration.

I live in the Philippines. I never been out of the country to live abroad. The Barangay officials would most certainly help you out. The laws apply to Filipinos and foreigners alike so you need be doubtful of that. They are only discriminatory against suspected sex offenders so cast your worries behind.

W: Hi Grazee. Well they not only say that about whites, but about asian foreigners too - chinese, japanese, korean. They even say to bald fat foreigners that they are "gwapo". That's what I don't get.

Yes I've noticed that charisma, personality and sweetness play a role in being "gwapo" too. For example, because I'm personable and easy going, it makes Filipinas feel the vibes of a natural close friend with me, and creates a comfort zone with them that makes them prefer me over other richer foreigners who have more dominating personalities and are not as easy going. That's one difference I've noticed between many Filipinas and American women, in that you don't have to be overly manly, brawny or a tough guy to seem like a "real man" to them for them to be attracted to you. If you are sweet and funny, often it's enough.

As to the barangay, they do seem to treat me fairly even though I'm a foreigner. But how come many foreigners say that Filipino law enforcement always sides against foreigners because they all see them as targets to exploit, so that the foreigner will never get treated fairly? Foreigners say this on the internet a lot, and in person too. Where did this conception come from?

Ladislav, what's your take on this?

Grazee, so do you live in the Manila area? Have you dated a foreigner before? If so, what was the biggest challenge you faced?

[Caveat Emptor]

Generally, Filipinas find foreigners handsome because they have pointed nose, white skin, different eye colors, well built and taller than most Filipino men. We Filipina, including me, find foreigners attractive physically. They would imagine having children with foreign physical features. If they tell you are handsome, you probably are. The money comes into play only after she knew that you have plenty of them. You will be then tagged as rich and handsome. You’re advisor has a point also; being charismatic, sweet and kind appeals to Filipinas as well. Its how you make the Filipina feel beautiful which makes her reciprocates that kind of physical adoration.

I live in the Philippines. I never been out of the country to live abroad. The Barangay officials would most certainly help you out. The laws apply to Filipinos and foreigners alike so you need be doubtful of that. They are only discriminatory against suspected sex offenders so cast your worries behind.

W: Hi Grazee. Well they not only say that about whites, but about asian foreigners too - chinese, japanese, korean. They even say to bald fat foreigners that they are "gwapo". That's what I don't get.

Yes I've noticed that charisma, personality and sweetness play a role in being "gwapo" too. For example, because I'm personable and easy going, it makes Filipinas feel the vibes of a natural close friend with me, and creates a comfort zone with them that makes them prefer me over other richer foreigners who have more dominating personalities and are not as easy going. That's one difference I've noticed between many Filipinas and American women, in that you don't have to be overly manly, brawny or a tough guy to seem like a "real man" to them for them to be attracted to you. If you are sweet and funny, often it's enough.

As to the barangay, they do seem to treat me fairly even though I'm a foreigner. But how come many foreigners say that Filipino law enforcement always sides against foreigners because they all see them as targets to exploit, so that the foreigner will never get treated fairly? Foreigners say this on the internet a lot, and in person too. Where did this conception come from?

Ladislav, what's your take on this?

Grazee, so do you live in the Manila area? Have you dated a foreigner before? If so, what was the biggest challenge you faced?

There are so many aspects of being “gwapo�, Winston. To tell you honestly, Filipino women tend to lie sometimes to avoid offending a man’s feelings or not to dismiss a possible romantic involvement with that person in the future. Sometimes, they find a man (foreigner or Filipino alike) to be attractive or desirable in some ways except physically. Sometimes they are desperate to land a man for a husband that they will employ every possible means to get that man interested with them. Of course you can’t let a man stay with you for reasonable exchanges of emails if you told him at the onset of the conversation that he is ugly beyond comparison. I believe men do the same thing to girls just to get laid. So you might be “gwapo� because you’re kind, sweet, has money perhaps and intelligent. It doesn’t matter if you are bald or has a bulging belly because all they care about is a good conversation and promises of good future.

As to barangay officials, they sometime side against foreigners because they suspect them to be sex offenders and abusive. Sometimes, the barangay officials don’t like foreigners living in the community if they don’t reach for them or don’t get friendly with them. This has been the trend among foreigners. They tend to stay away from these officials for the fear of exploitation rather than befriending them for a little protection. Filipinos are naturally friendly. If you call them your friends, they will do whatever it takes to protect you. What is a pack of cigarette compared to the protection that you will get from them? If you have extra food in your house, you may want to share it with them. These are people who need to feel special also. It’s not bribery but what Filipinos call as “pakikisama� or camaraderie in English.

I don’t live in Manila area but in the nearby province of Cavite. I haven’t dated a foreigner ever since. I guess they don’t see me as attractive. LOL! I have been around foreigners though due to the nature of my work. A friend of mine married an American retiree and he seems to like my outgoing personality. I had a German pen pal when I was younger but the friendship did not prosper to a romantic affair because I am scared of the thought of being intimate with foreigners personally. I don’t know why. Probably the fear comes from my very conservative upbringing.