Being Accepted In A New Country

[Jester]

Being accepted in a new country -- where is it easiest?

Where do people welcome White Americans, rather than view them with suspicion?
Where would it be easiest to make friends who would invite you into their homes, or to a party where there are girls?

Here's a couple of comments from another thread that got me thinking about this question:

Social circles are everywhere, but it doesn't mean a society is open to meeting foreigners. Italy is a place where they don't care to meet foreigners or immigrants, in fact they're despised.

If you want a place where a (white, Caucasian) foreigner is revered and he receives trust and authority even before he can prove he is worth them, then Italy is not the place. Nowhere in Europe is the place, even Moldova and the poorest fringes of Eastern Europe and the Baltics. People have their own lives, their own trouble. If they find you interesting, they would be curious and connect to you.

At least in Italy, it's not about the size and quality of the house, but the quality of the people (and, why not, the food and wine too) that matter.

You fail to tell everyone those are people who cultivated relationships that took 2,4,5 years to when you're able to invite them over. You can't just rush things and make friendships as easily as other countries.

Now I know someone will pipe up and say "know the language before you go". Wrong. I know English damn well, and making friends in the USA is still hard. So language is not the be-all. Second, noone knew English when they came to America before World War Two. Noone. (Except the Irish). They learned in-country. Besides, language school in country is cheaper and comes with benefits like a place to stay and a visa.

So let's assume you have your average HA egghead, over-literate from the internet, White or can pass, American-born, not rich, can scratch out a living online to start, hopes for integration in to the local economy later, owns and dabbles in a Pimsleur language course.

I am not asking where the panties will drop fastest. I am asking where I can make friends easiest.

[Jester]

here's another brief thread on the same topic:

viewtopic.php?t=24458&highlight=

[Jester]

Here's the actual post that got me rolling on this, from yet another thread:

All of this to give a corollary of sort of what you wrote above: how the hell you blend in is a function of the distance between your local culture and way of thinking (which is a function of personality, family upbringing etc.) and that of your chosen host country. The smaller the gap to jump, when you decide to jump, the safer and smoother the landing.

[gsjackson]

Dunno where the mainstream culture would be most welcoming. Obviously enough, I guess, it helps tremendously if you have a subculture in common. Ireland is the only other country besides Canada where the American version of my sport is played extensively. So I've automatically got a social circle here, and those guys couldn't be any more welcoming than they have been. As they are welcomed (though less genially) when they come to Tucson, which is an American hotbed of the sport.

I've crammed more experience of the culture into five days in Ireland than I did in a month or more in residence in other countries.

So, maybe focus on a subculture of interest and where it thrives. Or get one, if you don't have one.

[ladislav]

Acceptance is a relative term. I would say white Americans will be most welcome in the countries where people look like them and talk like them first- meaning other Anglo countries.

Next, they will be most welcome in countries which have long standing positive relationship with the US and in which the US culture is very popular- such as the Philippines.

[zboy1]

Acceptance is a relative term. I would say white Americans will be most welcome in the countries where people look like them and talk like them first- meaning other Anglo countries.

Next, they will be most welcome in countries which have long standing positive relationship with the US and in which the US culture is very popular- such as the Philippines.

Whites created the whole effed-up racial system so prevalent in the world today, but now Whites want to escape from it, LOL! Ironic indeed.

[Repatriate]

Acceptance is a relative term. I would say white Americans will be most welcome in the countries where people look like them and talk like them first- meaning other Anglo countries.

Next, they will be most welcome in countries which have long standing positive relationship with the US and in which the US culture is very popular- such as the Philippines.

Whites created the whole effed-up racial system so prevalent in the world today, but now Whites want to escape from it, LOL! Ironic indeed.

Exactly, and the reason white women are so ruined is due in part to creation of feminism too. So not only is the racial environment toxic but so are the women. The people have basically destroyed their own nations with crappy belief systems and now they're looking to flee.

[ladislav]

Acceptance is a relative term. I would say white Americans will be most welcome in the countries where people look like them and talk like them first- meaning other Anglo countries.

Next, they will be most welcome in countries which have long standing positive relationship with the US and in which the US culture is very popular- such as the Philippines.

Whites created the whole effed-up racial system so prevalent in the world today, but now Whites want to escape from it, LOL! Ironic indeed.

Yes, but it's a fait accompli and a person sees his world in those terms. He did not create it himself and now he wants to escape it. The privileged "whites" are not on this site.

The "whites" only became "whites" when the New World colonization started. In Europe, they generally just think of themselves by ethnicity or nationality.

Still, most people are comfortable with either those who look like them and talk like them or with those who look and talk as if they came from a superior tribe ( that is not an enemy tribe). That's universal. Human nature.

Thus, black people from the US are treated very well in Ethiopia but Ethiopians don't get treated well in the US. A Kuwaiti man can go to Saudi Arabia and be treated very well but an Egyptian man will not be. A white American southerner will be treated very well in Croatia ( superior friendly tribe) but not well in Serbia ( superior but enemy tribe). A Croatian with an accent won't be treated well by rednecks ( inferior tribe) but a Brit with a queen's accent will be treated well.

White/ black is just one way of slicing the pie and mainly refers to the Americas.

[eurobrat]

Acceptance is a relative term. I would say white Americans will be most welcome in the countries where people look like them and talk like them first- meaning other Anglo countries.

Next, they will be most welcome in countries which have long standing positive relationship with the US and in which the US culture is very popular- such as the Philippines.

Whites created the whole effed-up racial system so prevalent in the world today, but now Whites want to escape from it, LOL! Ironic indeed.

Oh please, the Asians have cultivated their own version a long time ago http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Racism_in_Asia

How in god's name did you bring racism and finger pointing at whitey into this thread?

[Yohan]

Being accepted in a new country -- where is it easiest?

Where do people welcome White Americans, rather than view them with suspicion?
Where would it be easiest to make friends who would invite you into their homes, or to a party where there are girls?

There are many people in Asia who do not agree with US-politics, but if an individual white US-citizen is showing up here in Japan he is surely NOT viewed with suspicion.

If some US-citizens are not accepted and are running into troubles, it is usually because of their behavior - telling everybody that all is better and cheaper in USA, the American dream and endless paradise.

I know many US-citizens here in Tokyo, who are working for international schools, or as technicians, in trading companies etc. No problems at all to be in contact with the Japanese next door.

The problems are starting if an US-citizen is a typical newcomer and is complaining and wants to teach Japanese people what they should do or not should do in their daily private life.

Quite the same not only in Japan, but in some other Asian countries when US-citizens are looking for contact with individual Asian people.

You will run into troubles if you show up with the Bible and explaining Buddhism is a bad religion.
You will also find yourself into troubles if you show up as a do-gooder, complaining about parents and how they educate their children, we do not have any anti-spanking laws in Asia.
You will also run into troubles, when you show up with the typical feminist 'poor oppressed women' nonsense, calling Asian women to be mail-order brides.
It also make no sense to explain Japanese not to eat whale meat or similar food and complaining about meals local people like to eat.

In Japan there is no custom to invite friends and relatives to their own home. They all prefer to meet in restaurants, golf clubs etc, and if necessary to stay overnight, they prefer to book a hotelroom.

Japanese people do not invite for parties with girls - if you want to meet a serious woman it takes a while and usually Japanese people like the idea of introduction - often done at the work place where gossip plays a major role among female employees etc.

It's not about language, but it is about behavior and also in Japan, to find good private contacts take a while - you cannot find friends within a few days or a few weeks. This is true also for US-citizens of course, regardless if they are black, white or whatever race.

[Jester]

Dunno where the mainstream culture would be most welcoming. Obviously enough, I guess, it helps tremendously if you have a subculture in common. Ireland is the only other country besides Canada where the American version of my sport is played extensively. So I've automatically got a social circle here, and those guys couldn't be any more welcoming than they have been. As they are welcomed (though less genially) when they come to Tucson, which is an American hotbed of the sport.

I've crammed more experience of the culture into five days in Ireland than I did in a month or more in residence in other countries.

So, maybe focus on a subculture of interest and where it thrives. Or get one, if you don't have one.

Truth is so f***ing obvious when you hear it.

Shit.

Yes.

I have told my rugby-playing (MOST rugby-playing) son, to look for countries where they play that sport.

Yes.

SHIT.
I wish my (several) injured joints permitted me to play that sport. I would do that in a freakin minute. I loved the social aspect of rugby.

(You guys who used to play at Princeton around 1975 to 1977, here's a shout-out to you. Loved my time on the field, and drinking in the Tower afterward. Thanks for teaching me the sport, it was an honor and a pleasure playing with you.)

What sport do you play Professor Jackson? Was it handball, or squash? I forget.

Haha I wonder what sports I can still do. Is there group ocean swimming anywhere?

Used to dance real well, when I had a gf who was into it. Even with (then even worse) jacked-up joints... and painkillers all night after a multi-hour Armo "barahantes" (shindig). We did ballroom, Latin, and of course plenty of Armo freestyle.

There is a movie about a hitman who has a gig in Argentina. While he is there, he indulges in his passion, tango. Makes a friend.

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0283897/

I suppose there are other pastimes with which to bond besides sport and dance.

Museums, art.... I don't know.

[Jester]

Acceptance is a relative term. I would say white Americans will be most welcome in the countries where people look like them and talk like them first- meaning other Anglo countries.

No doubt u r right.
{remembering the experience of vomiting}

Next, they will be most welcome in countries which have long standing positive relationship with the US and in which the US culture is very popular- such as the Philippines.

Anywhere else?

Or is that it?

Grateful that there is somewhere.
Gracias a Dios.

[Jester]

Yes, but it's a fait accompli and a person sees his world in those terms. He did not create it himself and now he wants to escape it. The privileged "whites" are not on this site.

+1
And thank you.

Still, most people are comfortable with either those who look like them and talk like them or with those who look and talk as if they came from a superior tribe ( that is not an enemy tribe). That's universal. Human nature.

Thus, black people from the US are treated very well in Ethiopia but Ethiopians don't get treated well in the US. A Kuwaiti man can go to Saudi Arabia and be treated very well but an Egyptian man will not be. A white American southerner will be treated very well in Croatia ( superior friendly tribe) but not well in Serbia ( superior but enemy tribe). A Croatian with an accent won't be treated well by rednecks ( inferior tribe) but a Brit with a queen's accent will be treated well.

This is what I was looking for.

+10

[Jester]

Whites created the whole effed-up racial system so prevalent in the world today, but now Whites want to escape from it, LOL! Ironic indeed.

Oh please, the Asians have cultivated their own version a long time ago http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Racism_in_Asia

How in god's name did you bring racism and finger pointing at whitey into this thread?

Pretty sure ZBoy must be back in the USA. It f***s with your head, makes you angry. Like being bitten by a zombie.

[Jester]

If some US-citizens are not accepted and are running into troubles, it is usually because of their behavior - telling everybody that all is better and cheaper in USA, the American dream and endless paradise....

The problems are starting if an US-citizen is a typical newcomer and is complaining and wants to teach Japanese people what they should do or not should do in their daily private life....

You will run into troubles if you show up with the Bible and explaining Buddhism is a bad religion.

You will also find yourself into troubles if you show up as a do-gooder, complaining about parents and how they educate their children, we do not have any anti-spanking laws in Asia.

You will also run into troubles, when you show up with the typical feminist 'poor oppressed women' nonsense, calling Asian women to be mail-order brides.

It also make no sense to explain Japanese not to eat whale meat or similar food and complaining about meals local people like to eat.

In Japan there is no custom to invite friends and relatives to their own home. They all prefer to meet in restaurants, golf clubs etc, and if necessary to stay overnight, they prefer to book a hotelroom.

Japanese people do not invite for parties with girls - if you want to meet a serious woman it takes a while and usually Japanese people like the idea of introduction - often done at the work place where gossip plays a major role among female employees etc.

It's not about language, but it is about behavior and also in Japan, to find good private contacts take a while - you cannot find friends within a few days or a few weeks....

Great info, Yohan. Thanks.

Good post.

But.. it sounds like Japan is not the place to make friends easily (without formal "employment").

But damn, it would be interesting to visit. Whale meat, entertaining, rugby. Ah well.