How many of you actually Cold Approach girls?

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JollyBengali
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Re: How many of you actually Cold Approach girls?

Post by JollyBengali »

Any date/girlfriend I had before was through friends. Same with pretty much everyone I know. I can't imagine any of the married guys I know having any success picking up women at the grocery or on the street; the thought is laughable to me. I'm pretty sure the people going on about cold approaching women are a tiny but vocal minority. An ugly man might still stand a chance by building a relationship from friendship with girls but he's doomed to failure at cold approaches.

Unfortunately, as I'm in my 30's and my social circles have dried up of single available women, I have no choice but learn how to cold approach, or resort to online dating.
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jamesbond
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Re: How many of you actually Cold Approach girls?

Post by jamesbond »

JollyBengali wrote:Any date/girlfriend I had before was through friends. Same with pretty much everyone I know. I can't imagine any of the married guys I know having any success picking up women at the grocery or on the street; the thought is laughable to me. I'm pretty sure the people going on about cold approaching women are a tiny but vocal minority. An ugly man might still stand a chance by building a relationship from friendship with girls but he's doomed to failure at cold approaches.

Unfortunately, as I'm in my 30's and my social circles have dried up of single available women, I have no choice but learn how to cold approach, or resort to online dating.
Once you are out of school and your friends are all married, your options for meeting single women through your friends is slim and none (and slim just walked out the door). :lol:

Cold approaching is something all guys have to learn at some point once they hit their 30's. It's easier to cold approach in a country were the women are receptive to men (eastern Europe, South America and the Philippines).
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The_Adventurer
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Re: How many of you actually Cold Approach girls?

Post by The_Adventurer »

I never cold approach girls. As a black foreigner who stands out in Asia, plenty of girls approach me. Usually to ask the same ol' quedtions, where am I from, what am I doing here etc. but that can lead to who knows what. Plenty add me on qq and wechat for no reason as well. Well, most likely want a free english experience or something.
Winston wrote:However, what I've noticed is that if you go out everyday and do stuff and ask people for directions a lot, you do end up meeting some people and getting phone numbers from girls. But it seems that it only happens when you are not actively looking for girls or trying to pick up girls.
This really says it all. I am a very busy and active person. When I do my shows, I meet tons of girls and since they're at the event, I know there is some shared interest. When I am out and about, doing my thing, people here me speak Chinese, or Japanese when I was there, and they get curious. They come talk to me. This, of course, includes men and women, of all ages, even children and old people, but I still meet enough girls that I never need to consider cold approaches.
jamesbond wrote:Once you are out of school and your friends are all married, you options for meeting single women through your friends is slim and none (and slim just walked out the door). :lol:

Cold approaching is something all guys have to learn at some point once they hit their 30's. It's easier to cold approach in a country were the women are receptive to men (eastern Europe, South America and the Philippines).
It's really not necessary. I never saw dudes in a band need to cold approach. The same for artists who are willing to get out there and show their stuff. It seems many go to a place with no purpose other than to bang girls. Maybe that makes it necessary. Those who are involved in things, and active in their life just seem to mert naturally.
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Bane
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Re: How many of you actually Cold Approach girls?

Post by Bane »

zboy1 wrote: But if you're in a conservative country, such as in China, it's not going to work as much as opposed to places such as Eastern Europe, Latin America or the Philippines.
This was never a problem with me when I was over there. It was still much easier than in the US.
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Adama
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Re: How many of you actually Cold Approach girls?

Post by Adama »

The_Adventurer wrote:I never cold approach girls. As a black foreigner who stands out in Asia, plenty of girls approach me. Usually to ask the same ol' quedtions, where am I from, what am I doing here etc. but that can lead to who knows what. Plenty add me on qq and wechat for no reason as well. Well, most likely want a free english experience or something.
Winston wrote:However, what I've noticed is that if you go out everyday and do stuff and ask people for directions a lot, you do end up meeting some people and getting phone numbers from girls. But it seems that it only happens when you are not actively looking for girls or trying to pick up girls.
This really says it all. I am a very busy and active person. When I do my shows, I meet tons of girls and since they're at the event, I know there is some shared interest. When I am out and about, doing my thing, people here me speak Chinese, or Japanese when I was there, and they get curious. They come talk to me. This, of course, includes men and women, of all ages, even children and old people, but I still meet enough girls that I never need to consider cold approaches.
jamesbond wrote:Once you are out of school and your friends are all married, you options for meeting single women through your friends is slim and none (and slim just walked out the door). :lol:

Cold approaching is something all guys have to learn at some point once they hit their 30's. It's easier to cold approach in a country were the women are receptive to men (eastern Europe, South America and the Philippines).
It's really not necessary. I never saw dudes in a band need to cold approach. The same for artists who are willing to get out there and show their stuff. It seems many go to a place with no purpose other than to bang girls. Maybe that makes it necessary. Those who are involved in things, and active in their life just seem to mert naturally.
So get that. The more traditional type women approach men more than the stuck up, feminist minded, strong women of the USA.
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Re: How many of you actually Cold Approach girls?

Post by Adama »

jamesbond wrote:
JollyBengali wrote:Any date/girlfriend I had before was through friends. Same with pretty much everyone I know. I can't imagine any of the married guys I know having any success picking up women at the grocery or on the street; the thought is laughable to me. I'm pretty sure the people going on about cold approaching women are a tiny but vocal minority. An ugly man might still stand a chance by building a relationship from friendship with girls but he's doomed to failure at cold approaches.

Unfortunately, as I'm in my 30's and my social circles have dried up of single available women, I have no choice but learn how to cold approach, or resort to online dating.
Once you are out of school and your friends are all married, you options for meeting single women through your friends is slim and none (and slim just walked out the door). :lol:

Cold approaching is something all guys have to learn at some point once they hit their 30's. It's easier to cold approach in a country were the women are receptive to men (eastern Europe, South America and the Philippines).
The asexual, insecure women who dress slutty want to criminalize the day game cold approaches though. Like that Jewish girl and her video about all those ghetto men hitting on her while she was wearing tight, form fitting yoga pants while walking around Manhattan for TEN hours. Those poor inner city men, do you know what they did to her? They had the nerve to find her attractive. They also had the nerve to dare to say hello to a woman they didnt know, because they found her attractive. Obvious sexual harassment. Then she posted it on youtube.

Ironically, I bet the attractive women appreciate attention. They accept compliments with grace. Or they avoid those situations in which they know they are likely to receive treatment they don't want. In other words, if the men of certain neighborhoods are too aggressive for her liking, she will not walk through that neighborhood. Or she won't wear form-fitting clothing, because she knows it gets her the wrong kind of attention.

But saying that is slut-shaming. :mrgreen: :lol:

No standards for women, but more and more rules imposed on male behavior. Only an asexual, self-hating, unattractive witches could ever think of male attention as a bad thing.

Then there's the workplace. Some people successfully meet women there, but probably if you havent had much luck with women, you shouldnt try that. Cause likely if you've fumbled with women before, a fumble in the workplace can result in severe consequences. Since once again, all of the rules are imposed upon men, while women have no obligations of standards to live up to.

Random girls and cold approaches are the only way, especially after college, and especially as your friends get older. I look on Facebook and I see my old high school classmates who are just getting married. What kind of woman are they marrying? You wouldnt believe it, but it is like they've scrapped the bottom of the barrel. I mean really, I think it might be better to use your hand than bother with some of those women those men are marrying.
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zboy1
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Re: How many of you actually Cold Approach girls?

Post by zboy1 »

Bane wrote:
zboy1 wrote: But if you're in a conservative country, such as in China, it's not going to work as much as opposed to places such as Eastern Europe, Latin America or the Philippines.
This was never a problem with me when I was over there. It was still much easier than in the US.
I've successfully cold approached women with Chinese women in China too, but it was far easier in places like Thailand--where it's not as socially conservative as China or Korea.
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Winston
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Re: How many of you actually Cold Approach girls?

Post by Winston »

Seeker wrote:I never have. I've done a "warm approach" in clubs but only after I get a sign, I've started conversations in clubs but I don't consider that an approach because I've had no goal in mind. As for cold approaching women in public who are just minding their own business, forget about it. I can understand why a woman would turn bitchy due to being often hit on in the street by random men.

Cold approaching is just f***ing strange. I've never witnessed anyone get a woman by cold approaching, nor I do know anyone who met their partner this way.
Are you referring to America or abroad? In Russia and Europe and China and Philippines, cold approach works and is much more easy and natural. But whether it leads anywhere is another matter. A guy with good conversation skills can start conversations with women easily but it doesn't mean he can get dates or seduce women or get them to want him.

Do you know any guys that cold approach? Why does it look so easy in the movies? Some women assume that average friendly men can approach women and get dates too. Where do they get that idea?

When you see a hot or cute girl, don't you feel tempted to approach? How do you resist the urge? Its so painful to stand there and do nothing or work up the nerve to approach or hit on girls you like.
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Re: How many of you actually Cold Approach girls?

Post by HouseMD »

Winston wrote:
Seeker wrote:I never have. I've done a "warm approach" in clubs but only after I get a sign, I've started conversations in clubs but I don't consider that an approach because I've had no goal in mind. As for cold approaching women in public who are just minding their own business, forget about it. I can understand why a woman would turn bitchy due to being often hit on in the street by random men.

Cold approaching is just f***ing strange. I've never witnessed anyone get a woman by cold approaching, nor I do know anyone who met their partner this way.
Are you referring to America or abroad? In Russia and Europe and China and Philippines, cold approach works and is much more easy and natural. But whether it leads anywhere is another matter. A guy with good conversation skills can start conversations with women easily but it doesn't mean he can get dates or seduce women or get them to want him.

Do you know any guys that cold approach? Why does it look so easy in the movies? Some women assume that average friendly men can approach women and get dates too. Where do they get that idea?

When you see a hot or cute girl, don't you feel tempted to approach? How do you resist the urge? Its so painful to stand there and do nothing or work up the nerve to approach or hit on girls you like.
It looks easy in the movies because movies are nonsense.

I talk to everyone that looks like they need a bit of spark in their life- attractive women, tired veterans, lonely elderly people, etc. That's how I met most of the women I've slept with- we strike up a conversation and it happens to lead somewhere. Same strategy works at home or abroad. The thing is, I talk to people because I'm genuinely interested in people, not because I want to bang them. But every now and again, an opportunity arises when I'm talking to someone I find interesting and attractive, and things just kind of happen from there. I've got kind of a Taoist philosophy in regard to dating, I just let those things that come naturally happen. Forcing things is where the problem comes. My interactions are natural because they aren't forced and come from a genuine place of interest- I don't want to sleep with a woman until she sparks something for me intellectually, so there's no awkward ulterior motives hiding beneath my approach, just curiosity and conversation.
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Re: How many of you actually Cold Approach girls?

Post by nomadphilippines »

i cold approach girls all the time, in phils its quite easy because the girls like foreigners and are very friendly in general

the key is you need to make the approach quick and just slip them their number after telling them how cute they are, you should also write something nice on the paper, not just your number, they are interested in you, but they will be shocked/embarrassed and if you try to chat them up for a long time they may shoot you down

i get a text from about 1 in every 3 girls that i approach, but im a young white guy in the philippines so thats not all that brag worthy, my goal is to hand out my number 3 or 4 times every day, but that can be hard because 7's and up are hard to find


the main keys are: SMILE and do it quick, then be a gentleman in texts
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Seeker
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Re: How many of you actually Cold Approach girls?

Post by Seeker »

Winston wrote:Are you referring to America or abroad? In Russia and Europe and China and Philippines, cold approach works and is much more easy and natural. But whether it leads anywhere is another matter. A guy with good conversation skills can start conversations with women easily but it doesn't mean he can get dates or seduce women or get them to want him.
Didn't you just kind of agree with me and contradict yourself? You say it works but then admit it doesn't mean you can get anything out of it.
Do you know any guys that cold approach?
I have done but they certainly weren't the norm, all of them got rejected 100% of the time whether or they had a friendly conversation. Cold approaches are a common trope in American movies but they don't reflect real life.
When you see a hot or cute girl, don't you feel tempted to approach? How do you resist the urge? Its so painful to stand there and do nothing or work up the nerve to approach or hit on girls you like.
Lol wat I have no such urge. It would cost someone a lot of money to get me to cold approach someone.
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Re: How many of you actually Cold Approach girls?

Post by nomadphilippines »

Seeker wrote:
I have done but they certainly weren't the norm, all of them got rejected 100% of the time whether or they had a friendly conversation. Cold approaches are a common trope in American movies but they don't reflect real life.


Lol wat I have no such urge. It would cost someone a lot of money to get me to cold approach someone.
so you have never tried something but are 100% sure it is impossible for it to work for anyone

seems logical
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NoahValentine
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Re: How many of you actually Cold Approach girls?

Post by NoahValentine »

As a woman , i 've not seen any boy who appeared cool when approaching girl ,there was nervous behind their eyes
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Re: How many of you actually Cold Approach girls?

Post by traveller »

What exactly is "cold approaching?"
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Re: How many of you actually Cold Approach girls?

Post by nomadphilippines »

traveller wrote:What exactly is "cold approaching?"
walking up to a girl who you have never talked to........ like you walk past a pretty girl at the mall and decide to turn around and go up and say hi
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