S_Parc's very last response to the one known as Tsar

[S_Parc]

A long time ago, in the same galaxy, there was this dreamer/poster(er) named Tsar, who'd gained the sympathies of a lot of persons, for the difficulties he'd faced in life.

After countless threads, regurgitating very similar topics, I'd decided to throw one last challenge and that was ... to spend some time, learning the 90 lessons of Pimsleur Russian, available free of charge, if one borrowed the series from the local library network. This is a language series, specifically designed with the beginning learner in mind. It was not design for linguistic geniuses like Ladislav, who's a prodigy for language learning and doesn't require a simplified approach to the ordeal, using graduated recall intervals.

One year into the future from that time period, the so-called highly motivated (and very excitable) Tsar, completed a total of a week's worth of lessons, being able to *order a glass from water*, at some restaurant in St Petersburg. From his perspective, this is a form of accomplishment.

From my pov, given the fact that this guy has got, pretty much all the time in the world, it's a total and complete failure. Before I'd gone to Thailand, I'd spent the some 45 days, doing the set of 30 lessons. And no, I wasn't looking for a Thai wife, I was simply expanding my horizons.

Likewise, I'm sure that if someone offered him an opportunity to configure a bunch of switches and routers, he wouldn't bother to study for a CCNA (Certified Cisco Network Associate), because he'd feel that he didn't have any experience, despite the fact that someone was offering him a doorway into the world of network engineering. You see, I know this type of person and I'd seen his ilk before. Life will pass him by and that's that.

[Tsar]

I'm fine with that. I know you haven't liked me and consider me a "do nothing."

Not everyone can learn languages easily even putting in the time. I have downloaded the 90 Russian Lessons as digital files but it takes actual practice and speaking partners for the language to stick. Three days without practicing and I forget half of what I learned. I'm not good at memorization, maybe some people are. You're right to say that I am currently a failure at learning a new language. I completed more than week.

I do have a lot of time and I probably could be doing more with it.

I had little interest in IT. I majored in business because I wanted to be a manager or investment banker or some other decent white collar business job but those jobs go to young female graduates or Ivy League males (many happen to be Jews). If I could go back I would have probably gotten a degree in something like IT or another subject, but it's too late. H1B1s and companies sending jobs abroad also effect IT. No job is immune to being lost to cheap labor. I will admit there's a lot more jobs in IT sector than business.

Maybe you're right that life will pass me by, maybe you're be wrong. Only time will tell.

I'm going to quit HappierAbroad once the latest "Forum War" ends and maybe years in the future I'll post how I ended up. I will block this site by editing my host.exe file and I will change my email address on my profile to one I never really check. My PM is almost full anyway. Then that will be the end of it. The posts have gone down in quality and most of my threads get ruined. It's time I move on away from this space of the internet. I already have a few other forums lined up to keep a significant presence on internet forums and I am sure they will value my posts, which haven't been valued on HappierAbroad for quite a while now.

[S_Parc]

Not everyone can learn languages easily even putting in the time. I have downloaded the 90 Russian Lessons as digital files but it takes actual practice and speaking partners for the language to stick. Three days without practicing and I forget half of what I learned. I'm not good at memorization, maybe some people are. You're right to say that I am currently a failure at learning a new language. I completed more than week.

There are two prodigies on this forum, Ladislav for languages and Jester, for the applied sciences. Everyone else had to work hard for their accolades. (BTW, I'm not saying that Ladi and Jester never worked hard. I just believe that they were simply born more talented.)

With that stated, the Pimsleur lessons were designed specifically for those, who had a hard time learning languages. Their only requirement was that you did the lessons, daily, even if you needed to repeat them. I suspect that you gave up after a week, because you got bored of doing the exercises.

I had little interest in IT. I majored in business because I wanted to be a manager or investment banker or some other decent white collar business job but those jobs go to young female graduates or Ivy League males (many happen to be Jews). If I could go back I would have probably gotten a degree in something like IT or another subject, but it's too late. H1B1s and companies sending jobs abroad also effect IT. No job is immune to being lost to cheap labor. I will admit there's a lot more jobs in IT sector than business.

Once again, I'd said CCNA ... Certified Cisco Network Associate. Please tell me how a facility within the USA (including New England) is going to send the formation and management of their internal network to some group in Asia?

And finally, in more recent years, I'd gained admissions to Ivy league masters programs, while being of Anglican (read: not Jewish) background. So if I wanted, there was a possibility of segueing into banking w/o having started in it, straight out of college even in my 30s.

When I was in college, I'd also studied for the medical college admissions test (MCAT). You see, I was never in the mode of making excuses. My only mistake in life was being born into a dysfunctional family. Today, I'd overcome that.

All and all, when you have a psycho dad, you learn how to make it on your own. Apparently, you never had that experience and thus, you're trapped in some fantasy world, not here or there, but somewhere back in childhood.

[Tsar]

Apparently, you never had that experience and thus, you're trapped in some fantasy world, not here or there, but somewhere back in childhood.

No, my only goal as a teenager was to become an investment banker or get some other high-paying job. I wasn't like I am now. Life circumstances made me what I am and so did America. I'm not trapped in some childhood fantasy world. That's what you're wrong about.

Our experiences are very different.

Why become a debtor for a better chance at earning $60,000 or $100,000. I'm not going to become some slave for a chance at becoming a "peacock" in a corporate zoo in America.

I know the difference between a fantasy and something realistic.

If I wanted to rule the world then that would be a fantasy. That's a common plot in movies and comics.

If I wanted to marry a virgin jailbait girl that is realistic. Other men have done it. Difficult, maybe. Impossible, no.

If I wanted to do business with organized crime then that is not a fantasy. Many people conduct business with organized crime groups. It's just many people are too afraid or don't want to be unethical. I don't care about ethics or the law, the only thing I care about if being smart enough that if I do break the law then I do without getting caught and to have a backup plan if I do get caught so I can avoid arrest (and extradition).

I already used the online black market and bought steroids. I'm sure you would have considered that a fantasy. It was risky because I could have been scammed or been arrested for having a decent supply of them, but I'm sure you would have called my idea to buy and use steroids a fantasy. The steroids worked and I'm going to use them again in the future. I still have a small supply left to use for another cycle. I doubt anyone would thought I would be able to locate the sites on the internet that have people that sell those items and be willing to use the online black market but I have. Using the black market is not a fantasy, it's realistic. I wanted steroids, I couldn't get steroids legally, therefore I used the black market, I wasn't scammed, I could have been arrested if caught but I wasn't, and I got improvements because I was willing to do what I wanted and what it took to get what I wanted. It was illegal according to many parts of the American legal code but I did it anyway. I didn't care if it was illegal because I wanted steroids. I'll break the law when I want.

The in-person black market isn't much different than the online black market. Much of the same risks apply, except there's the additional risk of death which is a risk I'd be willing to accept to get something I wanted.

If I wanted to live on the magical island in the Bermuda triangle then that would be a fantasy. There's no magical island in the Bermuda Triangle and the Bermuda Triangle itself is mostly a thing of conspiracy theorists and Hollywood fiction.

If I thought I could buy a magical book and become a sorcerer, then that would be a fantasy.

See the difference?

[Ghost]

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[Tsar]

And of course over time I've tried to help him many times. English teaching is probably his only realistic way out now. And even then it's limited for him. But he'll just keep waiting for his royal navy to show up and rescue him. I recently PM'd him and said I wasn't going to help anymore for free. He didn't necessarily have to pay me for my help, but he to do something for me in return so that it wasn't so one-sided. Didn't get another PM from him after that. So add "selfish twit" to his resume also.

You called me an ingrate and your message seemed confrontational. I wouldn't respond to that under normal circumstances so I implicitly accepted your message saying you no longer wanted to help me for free. I respect whatever choice you make. I would have done something to help you in the future but you are true that I wouldn't want to spend money.

I am not a twit because I am not a silly or foolish person.

I hope the recent drama ends soon so I can leave.

[Ghost]

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[MarcosZeitola]

I hope we will get to talk on Skype some time, Tsar. A shame to see you leave, but it may be for the best. I dislike the part where you said you will simply migrate to "other forums where they will appreciate me more". This just creates an atmosphere where you are cheered on for your views, rather then questioned. And sometimes, it's healthy to take a critical look at yourself and your plans. This forum has provided you with ample opportunity for learning and reflecting. I hope you will continue to learn, evaluate and question yourself even when you move on to "more positive" forums.

I also hope that, if you do decide to add me on Skype, you will not block me if I ever say something that sounds too harsh. My time is a valuable asset, and soon I will have no more time to be of help to anyone here, or anywhere on the internet. So I hope you will take the opportunity and make use of it.

Life is too short already as it is, even without us wasting our time. Remember that. I wish you the best, and hope we can stay in touch. But I will say this: Ghost and S_Parc come across as well-meaning to me, and I don't feel they have acted in a mean or malicious way to you. Nothing Ghost has said warrants you calling him a "bitch", IMO. Harsh words and (unfair?) criticism are one thing, but I understand the frustration of having your advice ignored, messages go unanswered and being bombarded with excuse after excuse while seeing very little action from your side. Hopefully this will change.

[S_Parc]

Biggest problem though is that he wastes his time. He told me his normal schedule when we Skyped. He basically gets up, reads financial doom stuff on the internet (and posts a lot of it here apparently) and little else. A complete waste of time.

He could be studying Russian.

But no, he'd rather stay in anime fantasy land. Even using one hour of his time productively per day would show benefits after a while.

A year ago, I'd brought up the Russian thing for a couple of reasons. For one, it's not about international dating, it's about self-development and building one's inner awareness. In Tsar's case, he's shy and not outgoing. As a result, he spends much of his time at home, perusing sites like this one. In place of that, he could be volunteering at hospice centers and speaking with elderly members of the ex-Soviet diasporas. This was my idea.

And yes, they exist in his neck of the woods; he doesn't live in northern east Idaho but New England. The best way to break the ice is to speak in that person's native language. In fact, I'd almost guarantee that a senior citizen would be 100% delighted that some ordinary American would want to learn Russian on the side. When I was a kid, I used to spend time at the local VFW, listening to elderly veterans of WWII, Korea, and 'Nam because like Tsar, I was shy and needed to overcome that, to make it in the world. I was a teenager back then, not approaching 30. I wanted to break the cycle by the time I was an adult.

Instead of doing the work to gain cursory knowledge of Russian, given the fact that the Pimsleur lessons are free of charge (from the library), he decided to stop after a week's worth of lessons, now almost a year ago. And since then, he's had no motivation to make any additional steps in learning Russian and overcoming his shyness. And at the same time, he's gained little confidence in the ability to stick with a series of tasks and completing them. Anyone can talk about becoming a Cisco Engineer, running the Boston Marathon, or painting a Mona Lisa. It takes time and dedication to make it actually happen.

Anyways, I'm glad to see that Marcos is optimistic, however, I can't concur with that attitude. Sometimes, it's better to say the truth and see where the chips land. People make most of those serious kinds of changes, earlier in life. Even Marcos decided to start his new family in the Philippines during his early 20s. And even when I'd given up on dating, circa four years ago (operating in a modified version of MGTOW), I'd kept the door open towards friendships and being close to others and hence, I'm getting married next year.

[S_Parc]

For those who don't know what Pimsleur is, here's a sample, the first lesson of Russian ...



Just go through the motions of listening and repeating for the ~30 mins duration. You don't need to go back and forth continually, like a lot of other language programs. And then, if you're still uncomfortable, just repeat the lesson before you go to sleep.

You'll find that you'd have rather extraordinary recall, the following day, because of how the material is repeated and interwoven in the conversations. And then, each subsequent lesson starts with a review but then, repeats the prior phrases/words, within the followup lesson itself. Eventually, most Pimsleur students end up with 80% recall, at the end of the sets of 30, 60 or 90. You don't need Ladislav's photographic memory to do this, just consistent effort.

I'm posting this snippet, to show others what I'm talking about.

[Ghost]

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[Teal Lantern]

For those who don't know what Pimsleur is, here's a sample, the first lesson of Russian ...

My favorite lesson is where you learn that she "doesn't want to have drinks with you at 6:00" means see if she wants to have drinks with you at 7:00.
Pimsleur teaches more than one kind of persistence.

Spoiler: Drinks, at your place, a few lessons later.

[Tsar]

I hope the recent drama ends soon so I can leave.

Exactly what I'm talking about. No responsibility for your own actions. Nothing's keeping you here fuckboy. It's your choice whether you stay or leave.

Another insult from the forum drama-starter.

[Tsar]

And if he does try to go to other forums, he'll soon find that they don't like whiny, spoiled brats either. Most forums out there would probably ban him after a while for being annoying. He's got quite a privilege here that this forum is so tolerant and he doesn't care one bit.

You're probably right that I'd be banned on other forums but it won't be because I'm annoying. It would be because I post something anti-American or something that is not popular among the sheep that live in most corners of the internet.

I am leaving HappierAbroad because I can see my time here has passed so I might as well leave and not come back years into the future until I do something and change my life around.

[Ghost]

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