Ladislav - Women Are Beginning to Refer to Me as 'Rich'...

[globetrotter]

Other post on this:
http://www.happierabroad.com/phpBB2/vie ... highlight=

Three times this week, and I don't know why NOW and not during the past 7 months, various women have mentioned to me that 'You are riiiiiiiccchh'.

I never realized that this would be something that I don't like, but I don't. It isn't that I am afraid of golddiggers, I am not. I have finely attuned social senses and I am quite unscammable. I am quite able to refuse suggestions to buy the girls stuff, that's no problem. It's just that I don't like being thought of as loaded. I am just good with money, save about 50% to 90% of my salary here, have a very modest 5-figure savings account, and that is it. I don't spend money profligately, I don't flash cash.

One case I needed a new cell phone. Mine did not work here and I did some troubleshooting and the problem was definitely my unlocked NA purchased phone. So I went shopping with a young female friend and her mom (yes, met the entire family several times...) and I wanted to just get this f***ing problem out of the way, get a nice phone with what I needed, one that I would be using in China for several years. So I plonked down 1400 Yuan for a new phone, cross the street to withdraw the cash, come back and my friends mom (both of them younger than I) says to her daughter in Chinese that "He is rich". I reply that I just don't like to discuss it and I shake my head. She says that I am shy, I reply that's not quite the word but close enough. She then tries out three phones and asks me which one I like best. I know what she wants me to do and that won't happen. I pick the nicer one, she doesn't buy, we go to dinner, her father pays.

Second case another teacher's assistant calls me up at 10:30 with a grammar question. I help her out, we talk about our summer plans, then she mentions I am riccch and she gets extremely giggley. This one clearly is getting the hots for me or my wallet. This one is recently married, unhappily (mom and dad made them marry after 2 years of dating), and was joking over IM that I should buy her a sofa. In your dreams, babe. I am a decent fella but I also can count and if I am buying a woman anything then the sex is going to amortize out that cost per my own metrics. So if she wants a 3,000 Yuan couch we will be having a great deal of sex. I politely demur again, deflecting the subject.

I am not worried about being propositioned with business offers, I am sure they will come around and I am quite able to deflect them. I just want to fly under the radar and don't want people to think anything unusual about me. So far this has worked and for some reason the women have begun to sniff out what little money I have this week.

So to ladislav and Winston, how do you guys handle this? What do you say and how do you deflect their requests for the gifts and all that? My favorite, yet to be used, is:

"I just wired $200,000 back to the USA for my sick mother's expensive medical treatments. Sorry, can't help out now."

My baseline is that if I spend 100 yuan on a girl then we better have sex once. Cold, I know. But necessary.

In L.A. that figure would be $150. Last gf I had in LA the front loaded costs were high ($1,200) but after the sex began it dropped to $142 per unit.

Ladislav, how do you handle this?

These are middle class girls, all college educated, no damsel's in distress.

[Winston]

That annoys me too.

Just tell them that you have some money for your expenses, but not extra money to give away for free, and remind them that not even the rich chinese in their country gives away free money.

To teach them a parable, ask them this:

"If you went to Russia, many would also assume that you are rich and have extra money to give away everyday. Would it be true? Do you have extra money to waste everyday?" When they say no, then you say "See what I mean? You would be the victim of a false stereotype in Russia, right? Well now you understand that I am such a victim here too."

That parable puts them in your shoes so they understand the folly of their mindset.

Generally, if you tell everyone you're poor, you weed them out.

But yeah if you want sex for money, then just imply that if they sleep with you, you might be more generous, as a hint.

[ladislav]

All white people are seen as rich in Asia and they only need a small inkling that you have more than them, and you are rich. How to handle it? Impossible. Just go with it. Be rich! I personally see it as a good thing because it motivates me to actually make some big money and think rich. How can we disappoint them?

One thing one friend has taught me- you can never be treated by an Asian as an equal. So, you might as well try and appear as being superior.

Otherwise, you will be despised.

Play along!

What very indebted, recessed country with 10% unemployment trumpets around the earth the mantra that it is the richest in the world? America! And you are a citizen of it? So how can you not be richer than even a Saudi prince.

They've seen the movies.

[Adama]

All white people are seen as rich in Asia and they only need a small inkling that you have more than them, and you are rich. How to handle it? Impossible. Just go with it. Be rich! I personally see it as a good thing because it motivates me to actually make some big money and think rich. How can we disappoint them?

One thing one friend has taught me- you can never be treated by an Asian as an equal. So, you might as well try and appear as being superior.

Otherwise, you will be despised.

Play along!

What very indebted, recessed country with 10% unemployment trumpets around the earth the mantra that it is the richest in the world? America! And you are a citizen of it? So how can you not be richer than even a Saudi prince.

They've seen the movies.

If he is rich, if he doesnt give away his money when they ask, will they despise him??? That seems like he must give away money to find social acceptance.

[globetrotter]

All white people are seen as rich in Asia and they only need a small inkling that you have more than them, and you are rich. How to handle it? Impossible. Just go with it. Be rich! I personally see it as a good thing because it motivates me to actually make some big money and think rich. How can we disappoint them?

One thing one friend has taught me- you can never be treated by an Asian as an equal. So, you might as well try and appear as being superior.

Otherwise, you will be despised.

Play along!

What very indebted, recessed country with 10% unemployment trumpets around the earth the mantra that it is the richest in the world? America! And you are a citizen of it? So how can you not be richer than even a Saudi prince.

They've seen the movies.

I am thinking like J Adama here in that you seem to counsel that I should give away my money and act rich.

No thanks.

Do you know how people become Rich and accumulate Wealth? They don't spend their money.

First Rule:
Don't waste money. Don't spend money. Don't give money away.

You don't become Rich by spending money.


Should I get a steady GF or even marry then my money goes to my woman, my house, education for my kids, a car, appliances and such.

Until such time as that happens my money is for myself.

No one on this planet has ever given me a nickel, ever.

[Adama]

"I just wired $200,000 back to the USA for my sick mother's expensive medical treatments.

You just admitted that you are rich. There must be more where that came from, if you can afford it for mom.

[Winston]

All white people are seen as rich in Asia and they only need a small inkling that you have more than them, and you are rich. How to handle it? Impossible. Just go with it. Be rich! I personally see it as a good thing because it motivates me to actually make some big money and think rich. How can we disappoint them?

One thing one friend has taught me- you can never be treated by an Asian as an equal. So, you might as well try and appear as being superior.

Otherwise, you will be despised.

Play along!

What very indebted, recessed country with 10% unemployment trumpets around the earth the mantra that it is the richest in the world? America! And you are a citizen of it? So how can you not be richer than even a Saudi prince.

They've seen the movies.

It's one thing to go with it if you really are rich and have cash to spare. But if you are on a tight budget like me, then you can't live up to these illusions. That's when the problem starts. I cannot spend like there's no tomorrow if I can't afford to. So then the issue becomes, how to disappoint them? One way or another I got to.

That's the real question. And I gave some ideas in my post above.

[Winston]

"I just wired $200,000 back to the USA for my sick mother's expensive medical treatments.

You just admitted that you are rich. There must be more where that came from, if you can afford it for mom.

That's right. If you're going to use that line, don't tell them how much you sent your mom. Just say that you sent her all your spare cash and can't afford anymore. No need to go into any more specifics.

[Rock]

That annoys me too.

Just tell them that you have some money for your expenses, but not extra money to give away for free, and remind them that not even the rich chinese in their country gives away free money.

Are you kidding? Rich Chinese tend to be extremely generous to women they like! They give away truckloads of free money to these damsals in distress in the form of housing, cars, shopping money, and good hard cash.

To teach them a parable, ask them this:

"If you went to Russia, many would also assume that you are rich and have extra money to give away everyday. Would it be true? Do you have extra money to waste everyday?" When they say no, then you say "See what I mean? You would be the victim of a false stereotype in Russia, right? Well now you understand that I am such a victim here too."

That parable puts them in your shoes so they understand the folly of their mindset.

It will just confuse them. Consider the language gap, culture gap, socio-economic gap, education gap, and age gap. They ain't gonna get it comin from globetrotter.

[Winston]

That annoys me too.

Just tell them that you have some money for your expenses, but not extra money to give away for free, and remind them that not even the rich chinese in their country gives away free money.

Are you kidding? Rich Chinese tend to be extremely generous to women they like! They give away truckloads of free money to these damsals in distress in the form of housing, cars, shopping money, and good hard cash.

To teach them a parable, ask them this:

"If you went to Russia, many would also assume that you are rich and have extra money to give away everyday. Would it be true? Do you have extra money to waste everyday?" When they say no, then you say "See what I mean? You would be the victim of a false stereotype in Russia, right? Well now you understand that I am such a victim here too."

That parable puts them in your shoes so they understand the folly of their mindset.

It will just confuse them. Consider the language gap, culture gap, socio-economic gap, education gap, and age gap. They ain't gonna get it comin from globetrotter.

Women you are involved with are different. I was referring to giving away money to strangers or acquaintances or your girlfriend's family for free. When you have a girlfriend, you can work that out between you and her. I was referring to giving away money to general people for free. I don't think rich Chinese do that.

[The_Adventurer]

Do you know how people become Rich and accumulate Wealth? They don't spend their money.

First Rule:
Don't waste money. Don't spend money. Don't give money away.

You don't become Rich by spending money.

That is completely untrue. Those people are not rich. They are thrifty misers who accumulate money they can't enjoy.

Some of the richest people are the biggest free spenders around. They blow money like there's no tomorrow, yet they make money faster than they can spend it. Getting rich is not a result of savings or thrift.

Of course, "rich" means different things to different people. In my book, people who accumulate hundreds of thousands of dollars or even a million over 30 years of hard work and thrift, are not rich. They may have a comfortable retirement, but that is not wealth in any way I can imagine it. Many of the rich people I know make a million or more each year, yet do almost nothing, blow money like it was toilet paper and yet they continue to stay rich and keep making more. That's wealth!

[globetrotter]

Do you know how people become Rich and accumulate Wealth? They don't spend their money.

First Rule:
Don't waste money. Don't spend money. Don't give money away.

You don't become Rich by spending money.

That is completely untrue. Those people are not rich. They are thrifty misers who accumulate money they can't enjoy.

Some of the richest people are the biggest free spenders around. They blow money like there's no tomorrow, yet they make money faster than they can spend it. Getting rich is not a result of savings or thrift.

Of course, "rich" means different things to different people. In my book, people who accumulate hundreds of thousands of dollars or even a million over 30 years of hard work and thrift, are not rich. They may have a comfortable retirement, but that is not wealth in any way I can imagine it. Many of the rich people I know make a million or more each year, yet do almost nothing, blow money like it was toilet paper and yet they continue to stay rich and keep making more. That's wealth!

Ah, yes. This piece of bullshit, newage, prosperity thinking claptrap.

Why it's easy! All you need to do is KEEP WORKING AND EARNING INCOME FOREVER from your investments.

Nonsense.

Every rich person I have ever known, and that includes my own family, accumulated money by not spending it frivolously and then, after decades of hard work, spent it ON THEMSELVES, wisely. They give away a little, not tonnes. They are not foolish with money.

Bill Gates was a freakin MISER from 1976 until he began his charity. The stories are legendary of his hard work, no vacations and not spending money unnecessarily. MSFT's cash hoarding mentality is legendary, and you know it.

Your advice is how the rich have those who aspire to wealth, blow their money 'acting rich' so that 'they attract more money'.

Totally false, self-serving nonsense.

[The_Adventurer]

MSFT's cash hoarding mentality is legendary, and you know it.

Your advice is how the rich have those who aspire to wealth, blow their money 'acting rich' so that 'they attract more money'.

Totally false, self-serving nonsense.

I don't know what MSFT is actually. But if what you say is true, there would be no rich young people.

I didn't say there aren't people who accumulate a good amount of money by not spending, but I personally don't call that rich. Then again, what exactly is spending frivolously? One of my friends, for example, always wears suits that cost thousands of dollars. He has no desire to wear anything less. He threw down a good chunk of cash to get a BMW because he just got tired of his Z.

I will admit I work in entertainment, so maybe I see a different path to riches that someone in another industry, but I don't see how any of what my friends or even some of my former bosses do is "new age" or some kind of "clap trap" as you say. What's the point of making money if they're not going to spend it on themselves for fun and right now? Why wait 30 years!

Bill Gates may have been a miser, but the guys who created the legendary game DOOM, were driving ferraris immediately after that game hit. They had women, parties and fun. They are still around getting richer today, because they continue to have great ideas.

As for hard work. I'm sorry, the people I know simply don't work hard. EVER. They have ideas. Just to give one example. A guy I knew had an idea for a product and a website. He knew absolutely nothing about the internet and had no desire to learn. He hired someone to put his website together and get his idea to market. He did almost nothing. Yet he is raking in the cash. The person who did the work was paid a wage.

Think about it. Have you ever worked for someone else? You were probably paid a wage that stayed the same no matter what you created or did, right? How much work did your bosses do? When I worked in a popular game studio, my boss stayed home playing Everquest everyday. We almost never saw him! He also had awesome cars, many houses and condos, girls and so on. He spent his money on himself, for fun! People worked for him for a wage, even if they created a game that sold 5 million copies.

Your path of working hard for half your life to accumulate a bit of money which you might be able to enjoy when you're old can work. I just think there are much better ways, and I think ideas are worth more than any amount of labor.

[globetrotter]

MSFT's cash hoarding mentality is legendary, and you know it.

Your advice is how the rich have those who aspire to wealth, blow their money 'acting rich' so that 'they attract more money'.

Totally false, self-serving nonsense.

I don't know what MSFT is actually. But if what you say is true, there would be no rich young people.

That's Microsoft. Maybe you have heard of this company?

I didn't say there aren't people who accumulate a good amount of money by not spending, but I personally don't call that rich.

Of course you wouldn't because then your position in this discussion is false. I have had enough. If you are dishonest enough to redefine terms at your whim, then you are just being willfully intellectually dishonest and reasoned debate with you is not possible.

This 'Think Rich' mindset you have is just a bunch of bullshit. Most people work long and hard to accumulate wealth and do NOT do it as easily as you make it out to be. Silicon Valley is not 'normal' and you very well know it. Los Angeles and the entertainment industry is DEFINITELY NOT normal and you damn well know it. If everyone had the talent that the very few people you know have then everyone could do that -- but everyone does NOT have that talent and you know it and to insist that everyone use the John Carmack model is dishonest. He is one of the top 3-D engine coders on the planet. That's talent. Few people can do that but most people can work hard.

I will admit I work in entertainment, so maybe I see a different path to riches that someone in another industry, but I don't see how any of what my friends or even some of my former bosses do is "new age" or some kind of "clap trap" as you say. What's the point of making money if they're not going to spend it on themselves for fun and right now? Why wait 30 years!

The attitude of The Young. Let's see how much they have in 40 years. Entertainment industry is FULL of examples of people who blew it all, wasted it frivolously and foolishly. What you are describing is luck at a young age, not work.

Bill Gates may have been a miser, but the guys who created the legendary game DOOM, were driving ferraris immediately after that game hit. They had women, parties and fun. They are still around getting richer today, because they continue to have great ideas.

The also worked for YEARS from 1988 to 1994 to code ID Tech 1 as it is now called. They did not spend the money before they made it. John has also stated that once you have one Ferrari there is no point in getting another. Thus he isn't pissing his money away on non-appreciating assets like new suits.

Your path of working hard for half your life to accumulate a bit of money which you might be able to enjoy when you're old can work. I just think there are much better ways, and I think ideas are worth more than any amount of labor.

Yeah, your way is called laziness, shortcuts, impatience and immaturity.

I don't have time for people such as yourself who redefine terms to suit their own justifications.

The people I know who became wealthy worked hard, saved money and after a few decades they built up their business to the point where they could hire people to run it. This is how most people became rich, not with the Internet or a PC game or a website as your few examples would have someone believe.

You are aware of selection bias, yes? Just because your friends all do XXX doesn't prove a thing.

Dismissing my example of Bill Gates is just dishonest debate technique. I could cite Einstein's years of toil in total obscurity, Edison's decades of research, Arnold S.'s decades of working out and buying real estate. None of those people got rich by giving it away before they earned it. All of them persevered for decades.

My brother's wife spent years on a silly idea for keeping grass clear of bird droppings. She worked hard, had a modest house, ate pizza, had a used Benz and few luxuries. She worked 6 or 7 days a week, for about 15 - 20 years.

Last month they moved into a $3 million mansion on 55 acres.

Your denial of what works is just that -- denial. Citing the luck of a few young people is foolish, at best.
[/quote]

[momopi]

There's a saying that "wealth doesn't last 3 generations".

Asians are very good at working hard and saving money, but the Western world developed a better idea to save the wealth. "Old money" families in the West set up trust funds and send their children to private schools, where children wear uniforms and are permitted the same amount of allowance money. The kids are taught the value of money and have professionals assist them in managing it. If they wish, they can relax and live as a trust fund baby and enjoy life.

In East Asia, you have grandparents who worked very hard, pass the business down to the parents, who also worked hard and grow the business, then spoil the crap out of their kids. When the spoiled brats graduate from college, they want to eventually hand the business down to them regardless of competency. If anyone remembers Wayne Labs...! Can you imagine Bill Gates insisting on handing Microsoft to his daughter? Needless to say, numerous family business and wealth were laid to waste by the 3rd generation.

Look around Taichung in Taiwan. Those very expensive and exclusive hostess clubs for men exists because there are idiots who'd go there and blow their parent's money. As soon as they get off the car, they start tipping large bills just to have the door man bow and say "boss! Welcome!". After they're stead, they start blowing cash on a selection of girls and shower them with expensive gifts, and "bao" a few as mistresses.