Xephoroph wrote:Hi, my name's Andre, I'm American and currently live in the US. I'm currently dating, and am in a very serious relationship with a Taiwanese girl. A Taiwanese girl whom, although was born in the US, lived most of her life in Taiwan, and a little bit in Cambodia.
I agree with many things you've said that Taiwanese girls are, they are very cautious, distrusting, superstitious with no real reason to be, and definitely hard to get. They give you the cold shoulder as if they don't have time for you and that they don't want anything to do with you. She's beautiful and way out of my league, but I've won her heart and she's changed as a person since dating me. I don't believe all Taiwanese women are impossible, but more so they have a really hard shell to crack and once you break that barrier, they're very much a human. In fact I think it was harder to convince her mother to accept me (especially being a foreign white male who makes average pay and no college degree), than it was to convince her to accept me. Here's the thing, flirting with them head on will only turn them off right away, unlike American girls who are very social and open for the most part, they will automatically assume you want to use them and cast them aside if you're a flirty person, a flirty person is seen as a a troublemaker and a heart breaker; (my girlfriend told me this). It seems they only want to be with someone with a degree and has high goals and a lot of confidence, but since I had none of those traits, it seemed impossible for me. I simply remained myself and talked to her every day without rushing anything, I was persistent. I'm generally very honest and open about my thoughts, caring, gentle, I don't really swear much (she hates that), and everything but the ideal rich foreign white male who can make their family richer.
All in all, perhaps lightly flirting with many Taiwanese girls would be impossible, but if you're persistent and honest, there's definitely hope to date a Taiwanese girl.
Good luck.
Hi Andre,
Welcome. So how did you meet your Taiwanese girlfriend? How did you first get her attention? And how did you get your first date with her? I cannot even get coffee dates with them now. They all ditch me fast. And the ones in the past just ignore me like I don't exist.
Even if I don't act flirtatious with them, so what? What am I supposed to do? Talk to them like an ordinary person for a long time and then after a while, ask "Do you want to have coffee after work?" or something? That's so cliched. And it doesn't often work. They keep their distance and even if they go out with you, it's often platonic and casual friends only. They don't escalate things. They don't do things the way we do in the Western world.
Just because you can get a Taiwanese girl doesn't mean everyone can. Everyone's karma and destiny and path is different. If you aren't meant for a Taiwanese partner, it won't happen. Things will go wrong if you try for something that's not meant to be. I don't think you did anything special that others can't do or that I can't do. It's simply part of your destiny and karma, so it happens naturally with the flow of things. Just because some guys can do something, doesn't mean everyone can. Nothing worthwhile is easy, and not everything is meant for everyone.
The thing I don't get is, if they won't talk to you, how can you get to know them? It's an oxymoron. You would have to go talk to a Taiwanese girl you work with, who is forced by her job to see you everyday. If you just visited a Taiwanese girl you like at her work everyday, it's a long shot. She will be all business with you and not talk to you much. And even if she socializes with you, she will not reply if you ask her out or be hesitant about it. And if she goes out with you, its very platonic, not romantic or sensual. They are frigid.
I got the LINE contact info for this sweet friendly Taiwanese receptionist girl at my dentist office. Yet when I ask her out, she doesn't reply. Apparently, it's a big deal for her to go out with me and crossing the line.
WTF is up with that? Why is it a big deal to go out with a guy for coffee? Most foreign girls don't mind. Taiwan is more like the US than Asia.
The point is: If they wont reply to my messages or go out with me, then how can i "work on her"? Its logically impossible.
Moreover, i get a negative and misanthropic vibe from Taiwanese girls, not a positive relaxed one. So how am i supposed to be positive and social around them? Its like trying to be positive around someone who doesnt like you. Its very awkward and uncomfortable.
Why do you say American girls are more open and social? No one here thinks that. If you flirt with them, after a while, they will call security or the police because flirtation is a violation and harassment. Especially on the West Coast. They are super picky and standoffish and dislike men. They all claim to have a boyfriend, if you aren't their type. It's a violation of their "equality or superiority" if you flirt with them and treat them like women. American girls are only open in the movies, not in real life. Where do you get that they are open and social? Have you even been to America?
In spite of all this, in Taiwan, you do see couples everywhere, and in most of them, the guy is not attractive. Though most Taiwanese guys with girlfriends are tall and thin, even if their face is ugly, nerdy or average. So it looks like getting a girlfriend in Taiwan is easy and that any guy can do it. How do you explain this?