Isolation and lack of civil behaviour in society

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Kradmelder
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Isolation and lack of civil behaviour in society

Post by Kradmelder »

There have been many threads by people saying society is isolating, no one talks to you, people are nasty and unfriendly, ignore you or give wrong directions etc.

I was just at the shops and bought 2 bottles of wine for a braai tonight. At the till the woman behind me smiles and says do you want trade your wine for my meat? :mrgreen:

Outside i had my bike up on the pavement. I never use parking lots like a cager. As im putting the stuff on my bike a man comes up to me and says i really like your bike.

When we go for walks in the evening on my streets there are few people. When a jogger, dog walker or other stroller passes by they always look at you and say hello, goeienaand, or at least a smile and nod. Even a black man is more likely to say good evening baas or chief than to ignore you if i greet him.

At a traffic light when i pull up on the white line between lanes and look down into a car, women smile, some wave, most kids wave. In the aisles in the supermarket women smile and men nod if i look at them. That is normal to me.

If i looked like some kind of freak or white trash probably they would ignore me.

In london and europe in general i notice people avoid eye contact and if you look at them and smile or greet they look at you as if you are insane.

Americans are more apt to greet back.

If you are well presented, shaven, dressed neat, hair tidy etc what sort of reaction would you get where you are if you smile at someone or greet them?


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starchild5
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Re: Isolation and lack of civil behaviour in society

Post by starchild5 »

In India...its also no issues.in Asia people are social and sane :)
Kradmelder
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Re: Isolation and lack of civil behaviour in society

Post by Kradmelder »

starchild5 wrote:In India...its also no issues.in Asia people are social and sane :)
In africa indian people greet me with hello my friend. Special price for you today just because you are my friend. This when they have never seen me before and dont know me from a donkey in the road :lol:

They see a white face and just want to take your money. Special price and being their friend means you will be charged double :lol:

On the plus side, i was staying in a hotel in dar es salaam once. Very black and very dirty. A local indian told me a white man cant stay there with all those kaffirs. Come stay at my house. No charge and the food was incredible. I was expecting curry after curry but it was not. He said his part of india they dont eat hot food. They were hindu. The food was so good it made me buy an indian cook book and i went home with a pile of spices. :lol:

Muslim indians treat you like i am the worst of kaffirs. Special plates and cups because i am unclean, wont put their meat on the grid as mine etc. The way a white man treats a dirty bush kaffir.
Eric
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Re: Isolation and lack of civil behaviour in society

Post by Eric »

starchild5 wrote:In India...its also no issues.in Asia people are social and sane :)


Haha. Not in China they aren't, the most uncivil part in the entire whole world...seriously, nobody looks up and greets you. nobody acknowledges you. They treat you like dogs and each other like dogs.

People spit, trash and spite each other. Nobody looks at each other, no facial expressions, cold....... deadened society.
Misery and happiness are only states of mind.
fschmidt
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Re: Isolation and lack of civil behaviour in society

Post by fschmidt »

Is fake smiles and people asking "how are you" without having the slightest interest in the answer civil behavior? If you think it is, America is for you. But for me, civil behavior means actually acting in a considerate manner where "considerate" is based on the word "consider" and means to consider what is really right for other people. To give a concrete example, I recently had the misfortune of having to leave my house and fly somewhere. My connecting flight was 2 hours late, something common now in America but virtually unheard of in the past. So I asked the person at the gate why the flight was late, and of course he didn't know and didn't care, but he was polite with the usual American smile. On the plane, there is endless fake banter from the pilot on the sound system which I block out with a white noise generating app on my phone. In the airport, every few minutes are various warnings about how to keep safe from nonexistent threats. To get to planes, one has pass TSA (Transportation Security Administration) security with its long lines that are a result of them not really giving a f**k about passengers.

Flying is my primary exposure to Americans these days since I avoid them like the plague. And it is a miserable experience, only made tolerable by my white noise generating app which blocks out the meaningless babble of Americans, but doesn't block out their fake smiles. I would much prefer a society where no one talks to me instead of the fake talk of Americans.
Eric
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Re: Isolation and lack of civil behaviour in society

Post by Eric »

Join Islam, my friend. It is not like this I promise you. .... I was thinking about it. Trying to get out of here now, arranging organizing a job with NGO's overseas as I am speaking with you. I understand you completely.

In my opinion, do that or why don't you just join an Orthodox congregation, Chabad or some other sort of Hassidism, they will be the only ones left, around when the dust actually clears. I'm speaking from a purely pragmatic viewpoint. Everyone else is stupid, dumb or hopelessly lost. The only other option you have left is surfing the American society like a wave, but not getting caught up in it. Promiscuity, sex, fun etc...easy money, etc. Working, jobs.
But don't lose yourself. I"m not saying it's a good thing.
I'm saying it's an option, as I see it those are your options. Being my age bracket - that's how I see them.
Misery and happiness are only states of mind.
Adama
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Re: Isolation and lack of civil behaviour in society

Post by Adama »

One thing you have to realize about people, is that many of them have this "I am better than you" type of personality (or rather, I will destroy you with insults and condemnation to prove that my life is better than yours, and therefore I am superior). They either need to brag incessantly of their successes or they need to put you down. Either way, it is just a prideful person's way of proving to himself or herself, that they are better than someone else. Therefore if you don't have my success, you are a loser, and I am the great one, is what they say to themselves.

They are not content just to live, eat and drink. They must brag, uplift themselves, prove to themselves that they are better and separate themselves above the rest. And they don't even recognize (some of them), that because of their super inflated egos, they are literally just destroying others around them with cruel words, trying to make them out to be less than them. That is murder.
Eric
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Re: Isolation and lack of civil behaviour in society

Post by Eric »

One thing is clear to me, abundantly. People have their heads up their ass. And they think they're smart, sophisticated...etc., with narcissism as you said. They honestly have no clue, they look lost.

If you look around the society...you will be lost, sorry for all the kids.

Don't know how the society operates. People most of them must be really as dumb as sheep... no aspiration. no thought. For higher beings, its a challenge because we think, we are sharper...we realize things and thus hit sharper edges, can confuse ourselves over thinking "simple" things. Its a challenge being intelligent....but its worth it.

These people are lost...
Misery and happiness are only states of mind.
Eric
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Re: Isolation and lack of civil behaviour in society

Post by Eric »

There is too much it going on and too many distracted, confused people with different agendas. The real reason society came apart is the women...they need to stop wearing revealing clothing.

Men can't think and come undone. This is the reason. Its women. The only way is to detach and surf it like a wave.
Misery and happiness are only states of mind.
fschmidt
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Re: Isolation and lack of civil behaviour in society

Post by fschmidt »

Eric wrote:Join Islam, my friend. It is not like this I promise you. .... I was thinking about it. Trying to get out of here now, arranging organizing a job with NGO's overseas as I am speaking with you. I understand you completely.

In my opinion, do that or why don't you just join an Orthodox congregation, Chabad or some other sort of Hassidism, they will be the only ones left, around when the dust actually clears. I'm speaking from a purely pragmatic viewpoint. Everyone else is stupid, dumb or hopelessly lost. The only other option you have left is surfing the American society like a wave, but not getting caught up in it. Promiscuity, sex, fun etc...easy money, etc. Working, jobs.
But don't lose yourself. I"m not saying it's a good thing.
I'm saying it's an option, as I see it those are your options. Being my age bracket - that's how I see them.
My choice is none of these. I am part of the small Mikraite group and I want to associate with conservative Mennonites. You didn't mention these options. I go over all options here:

http://www.mikraite.org/Moral-alternati ... tp835.html
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Zambales
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Re: Isolation and lack of civil behaviour in society

Post by Zambales »

Adama wrote:One thing you have to realize about people, is that many of them have this "I am better than you" type of personality (or rather, I will destroy you with insults and condemnation to prove that my life is better than yours, and therefore I am superior). They either need to brag incessantly of their successes or they need to put you down. Either way, it is just a prideful person's way of proving to himself or herself, that they are better than someone else. Therefore if you don't have my success, you are a loser, and I am the great one, is what they say to themselves.
Highly insecure individuals who lack any real substance to their being. Usually materialistic.

I don't think they realize their actions speak far more about themselves than the person they're berating.
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starchild5
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Re: Isolation and lack of civil behaviour in society

Post by starchild5 »

Kradmelder wrote:
starchild5 wrote:In India...its also no issues.in Asia people are social and sane :)
In africa indian people greet me with hello my friend. Special price for you today just because you are my friend. This when they have never seen me before and dont know me from a donkey in the road :lol:

They see a white face and just want to take your money. Special price and being their friend means you will be charged double :lol:

On the plus side, i was staying in a hotel in dar es salaam once. Very black and very dirty. A local indian told me a white man cant stay there with all those kaffirs. Come stay at my house. No charge and the food was incredible. I was expecting curry after curry but it was not. He said his part of india they dont eat hot food. They were hindu. The food was so good it made me buy an indian cook book and i went home with a pile of spices. :lol:

Muslim indians treat you like i am the worst of kaffirs. Special plates and cups because i am unclean, wont put their meat on the grid as mine etc. The way a white man treats a dirty bush kaffir.
Yeah..They do this everywhere...Notoriously in Thailand..Hello My Friend thing and charge double the price...Most are actually from north western province of India..The trader class...They are called Baniya in India. Even Indians hate them..

India was never a big country as we see today...it was divided into provinces by the royalty..The british forced 1.2 billion humans to live on one law in one big country....so the blame of bad gets into everyone equally and the good points are reserved for elites.
MrMan
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Re: Isolation and lack of civil behaviour in society

Post by MrMan »

Eric wrote:Join Islam, my friend. It is not like this I promise you. .... I was thinking about it. Trying to get out of here now, arranging organizing a job with NGO's overseas as I am speaking with you. I understand you completely.
Why would you post such a thing, especially if he is considering the Mennonites? Don't you consider it unethical to encourage someone to go in a direction away from eternal salvation.

The only assurance of salvation guaranteed within the Islamic religion is that jadahists are told if they die warring in favor of Islam, that they will go directly to paradise. The rest of the Muslims believe they are going to hell, if only temporarily. There are groups that will offer you a chance to 'jihad' by blowing up a building or an airplane. These may be radical, non-mainstream Muslims. Notice that none of the Islamicist terrorist are non-Muslims. They are always a part of that religion. Why encourage anyone to join.

Fschmidt, have you ever considered Messianic Judaism? Jesus is the Jewish Messiah.
fschmidt
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Re: Isolation and lack of civil behaviour in society

Post by fschmidt »

MrMan wrote:Fschmidt, have you ever considered Messianic Judaism? Jesus is the Jewish Messiah.
I have been to 2 Messianic services and Messianic Judaism seems to combined the worst of Christianity and Talmudic Judaism.
onethousandknives
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Re: Isolation and lack of civil behaviour in society

Post by onethousandknives »

The isolation is more that actually making a real connection with people is tough. I would say on the whole USA is mostly pretty civil and friendly. But then there's lots and lots of random completely anti-social acts done for no good reason, as you can see in shows like Jackass, Viva La Bam, etc, then more anti-socialness from rap music, etc. The US is very different in that in other countries, the anti-social behavior seems to come from indifference (as in, leaving children to die on the street after getting hit by cars...) whereas in USA, a lot comes from malice. Authorities in other countries, the problem is mostly indifference, in USA, it's mostly malice. Both lead to different societal problems.

But "HEY HOW ARE YOU DOING, CUSTOMER I NEVER MET BEFORE, YOU'RE MY BEST FRIEND EVER!!" doesn't help you when you come home alone, have no friends to call on the phone, no friends to call to do anything, no place to go to actively meet people, nothing besides drinking and drugs to do in your town spontaneously to meet people. The bigger fact is, it's hard to make friends by just being open with people. Actual friends you can do things with, talk to whenever, etc. Not a lot of people really want to open up their lives and allow others in. Of course, not everyone, but a really high percentage of people. And I feel really guilty, as this American behavior of closing myself off has started rubbing off onto me, when I used to be a very open person. Everyone just wants their own little bubble, and is paranoid of the motives of anyone who wants to befriend them.

Anyway, for the most part people greet me, well, almost exactly how you are greeted in SA. It's fine.
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