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I thought it was just me

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elm118
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Joined: September 11th, 2009, 7:36 pm

I thought it was just me

Post by elm118 » September 11th, 2009, 8:19 pm

Wow, I thought it was my imagination or something.
Last year I spent a month and a half in Europe and the whole time I was there I experienced an ease and comfort in social interactions that led me to keep thinking to myself: "Whats been the big deal all these years?....theres nothing wrong with me at all"

At the time I mistakenly thought that I had just finally broken through some sort of personal hang ups that had previously been holding me back.

About a week after returning home I realized that it was going to be back to the same old shit.
I actually broke down in the street crying.

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jamesbond
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Re: I thought it was just me

Post by jamesbond » September 11th, 2009, 10:49 pm

elm118 wrote:Wow, I thought it was my imagination or something.
Last year I spent a month and a half in Europe and the whole time I was there I experienced an ease and comfort in social interactions that led me to keep thinking to myself: "Whats been the big deal all these years?....theres nothing wrong with me at all"

At the time I mistakenly thought that I had just finally broken through some sort of personal hang ups that had previously been holding me back.

About a week after returning home I realized that it was going to be back to the same old shit.
I actually broke down in the street crying.
It's not just you, the social conditions in America are bizzare to say the least. It is a lonely country to live in, unless you are a "high status male" then the women will be all over you. People in the US are anti-social and unfriendly especially the women! A lot of people in the US don't even know who their neighbors are! Only 7% of Americans socialize with their neighbors! WTF? Welcome to the "United Lonely States of America".

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Winston
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Post by Winston » September 14th, 2009, 5:30 pm

Welcome elm118.

No it's not you. It's a dysfunctional anti-social society where people are conditioned to forget their feelings, be tough and desensitized. And anyone who complains is blamed.

That's why you can't even talk about this in most places. You are supposed to blame yourself for your problems. That's the mainstream cultural mentality in the US. HappierAbroad is one of the few places on the internet where you are allowed to talk about this openly without condemnation.

So where did you go in Europe?
Check out my video series Female Encounters of the Foreign Kind and Full Russia Trip Videos!

Also see my HA Grand Ebook and Join Our Dating Sites to support us!

"It takes far less effort to find and move to the society that has what you want than it does to try to reconstruct an existing society to match your standards." - Harry Browne, How I Found Freedom in an Unfree World

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jamesbond
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Post by jamesbond » September 14th, 2009, 11:56 pm

Vinstonas wrote:Welcome elm118.

No it's not you. It's a dysfunctional anti-social society where people are conditioned to forget their feelings, be tough and desensitized. And anyone who complains is blamed.

That's why you can't even talk about this in most places. You are supposed to blame yourself for your problems. That's the mainstream cultural mentality in the US. HappierAbroad is one of the few places on the internet where you are allowed to talk about this openly without condemnation.

So where did you go in Europe?
Good points Winston, since were taught to "deny our feelings" and keep things hidden, maybe that's why the US has the highest rate of mental illness of any industrialied country in the world! Psychologists say, what is repressed will show itself in other ways, like heart disease, cancer, stroke or mental illness like neurosis or psychosis. Welcome to the United Repressed States of America! LOL :D

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Winston
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Post by Winston » September 15th, 2009, 6:01 am

elm118, I've added your touching story to this page of testimonials. Hope you don't mind. Now you can be a testament to others :)

http://www.happierabroad.com/ebook/Page74b.htm
Check out my video series Female Encounters of the Foreign Kind and Full Russia Trip Videos!

Also see my HA Grand Ebook and Join Our Dating Sites to support us!

"It takes far less effort to find and move to the society that has what you want than it does to try to reconstruct an existing society to match your standards." - Harry Browne, How I Found Freedom in an Unfree World

firethrower1000
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reply its not you at all

Post by firethrower1000 » September 17th, 2009, 2:10 am

winston is very right about that.....i too thought it was me but it was them i dont really know how to say it but to me America is not filled with humans....mental illness is caused primary by lack of sex and secondly by loneliness since being lonely for years can make you go craaazzyyyy.....I ACTUALLY WONDER WHEN THIS STARTED I MEAN DOES ANYONE HERE KNOW IF IT WAS LIKE THAT BACK IN THE SEVENTIES AND EIGHTIES????

AsiaBill
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Post by AsiaBill » September 24th, 2009, 6:46 am

I'm alot older than you guys so maybe the behaviors you are explaining came when the price of simple pleasures like beer, booze, dope & live concerts became SO INFLATED and the ever appreciating price of real estate made the majority of Americans "house poor". If you notice some of the best lyrics and music was written during that time period between the late 50s and late 70s cause it was easy and cheap to get loaded and explore one's inner self and those near to one. There are great new things available while you were growing up like the internet and the ability ( like Winston ) to earn a living on-line freeing yourselves from a boring on-site 9 to 5 job. But this SAME network of technological break throughs also had its downside, making people MORE INTROVERTED using techie machines to experience life instead of personal contacts and relationships. So maybe it's not only the women in the States but the whole society who have become politically correct introverts aka socially awkward retards. I haven't been back in my hometown for 7 years and have no plans of going unless MAYBE someone in my family passed away or maybe in 2012 for my 40th HS reunion. ( missed the 20th but had a blast at the 30th ).

Anyway I was LUCKY to have KNOWN at 18 years old in 72 that I didn't want anything to do with the middleclass American lifestyle so took off traveling the summer after high school with my thumb out. Traveling BEFORE guidebooks like the Rough Guiides and Lonely Planet series made fellow travelers reach out to one another for tips and places to work or ways of making money so we could all continue this great adventure we were experiencing away from the dull uneventful 9 to 5 syndrome. Since my wife and I own a guest house and beach resort since 86 and 91 we have noticed the change in world travelers and their social retardation tendencies and the lack of needing others as EVERYONE is an EXPERT now who bought a guidebook. Recently I have found out and feeling the need to admit to myself that I'm entering or already entered a DISRESPECTED MINORITY group classification that of being OLD at 55. When people say, "Sir" I still look behind me and wonder who they're talking to hahahehe.

I happen to be a diehard positive thinker though so MAYBE things will change in the States NOW that it's likely years of a financial downswing are upon them and times will be TOUGHER. Maybe they will wisen up about their consumer "junky" behavior traits and realize the simple things in life may have greater value than material things. maybe the women will realize that it's possible to be happy in a "SMALL" house rather than a HUGE house whoch helps drive the family members apart by it's size??? Time will Tell!
Last edited by AsiaBill on September 25th, 2009, 1:11 am, edited 1 time in total.
Life is Short! Traveling and the people you meet and experiences you have "on the road" will enhance your life forever so GO FOR IT! Feel FREE to ask me Questions about living and traveling in Asia & the Philippines.

Shokkers
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Post by Shokkers » September 24th, 2009, 3:56 pm

Glad you had a good time...

I'm looking to get over to Europe, but also looking into ways to stay there...beyond marrying a European woman.
It'd be te coolest thing to set up a heavy metal club in Prague.
Best, KK
KK's books CLOWNWHITE and INHUMAN RESOURCES are out now on Amazon.com!
"If you're going through Hell...Keep Going."--Winston Churchill

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Master
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How I feel

Post by Master » December 29th, 2009, 12:25 pm

This statement touched a deep nerve. Because it is so true. I felt your pain. Me having felt similar experiences as for the rest of us knew it you felt. I appreciate your honesty and purity.

Are you ever going to respond to your posts? As I don’t want to write my thoughts to wind.

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