Bao3niang wrote: ↑
August 4th, 2018, 11:31 pm
Disagree with Horanhgee,
I believe it is crucial for most young men in their twenties to find the right woman and settle down, especially in this day and age where good women are becoming ever more precious due to feminism, hypergamy and other things.
Wait a second, baoniang! What do you disagree with me on again?
I stated that I am all for a true relationship with women and also for marriage. I was stating to NorthAmericanGuy and GuyAbroad that it is very SHALLOW of them to think of women as prostitutes and to only "bang" a lot of them for their sexual pleasure.
Don't get me wrong. I was in the mongering boat when I was in college and even after graduating from college. But couple years ago, I started my second profession and I decided to date. I also tried a lot of online dating and using dating apps on my smart phone since moving to this area. I guess moving away from home and living away from my parents (moreso, my controlling mom) made me more interested in meeting women and dating. The problem is that I only have two friends living in this area and I do not know too many people in this area.
So okay, yes, if a guy can find a girlfriend in his 20s....then that is good.
HOWEVER, I do NOT recommend guys and girls to marry at an early age. No no no!!!
Young people tend to be immature and also tend to change during their late 20's. This leads to arguments and quarrels, and sadly, may lead to divorce.
In fact, in an ideal world, I think young males and females will seal the deal (not necessarily getting married, but heading towards that) by their late teens. Do you think I don't wish I hadn't met the right one when I was 17-18? Of course I wish I did. If I have a son, I would make sure, and pray that he meets the right girl as soon as he can. I would also encourage him to take the relationship into consideration (if it makes him very happy and I can see genuinely good qualities in the girl) before making every major life decision.
Again, I will disagree with you on this, Baoniang. Yes, you can find the right one during your high school years. But people tend to change and younger people tend to be immature.
Yeah, I guess in the "good ol" days, even here in the US, people married young right out of high school.
These days, people are delaying marriages because of college and further graduate school education and seeking other professional degrees.
The same phenomenon can be seen amongst younger people in East Asian countries. Study study study and marry later on in life.
I think marrying in your late 20's to early to mid 30's is an ideal time to get married.
Why do I believe young men should start looking for, and find the right one early in life? Perhaps it's a bit of the traditionalist / romanticist in me. There's an appeal to building a lifelong bond beginning early in life, something that's increasingly hard to find in this day and age. Hoping that the love is strong enough, it will keep two people tied together, where the relationship is above any other priority, and is viewed as key before anything else. When men are younger, it could be easier to find pure, genuine companionship because women except more from older men, financially and in other ways.
Again, there are some mature young people out there. However, there have been relationships that have failed and ended in divorce because people who married early on in life, like in their early 20's, saw things differently back then. But when they fast forward their lives another 10 years, things change and people change. I think it's important to finish college and to get a degree and then to get a steady job, rather than marrying at a super early age.
The older a man gets, having gone through several failed relationships, the more likely he is to become jaded.
You are assuming that all men in their late ages have been through relationships. Some of us have never been in a genuine girlfriend/romantic relationship here in the US because it's so f***ing hard to find a girlfriend here, let alone, your race and skin color is also a factor in finding a girlfriend here in the US.
Time is running out. If you don't start looking today / soon, it will only become more and more difficult because I don't see the state of things changing for the better.
Baoniang, you must be a Chinese national and probably moved back to China since Western life did not fit your lifestyle or your political views in life. Hence, finding a girlfriend and being in love will NOT be a problem for you since you are now back in your motherland.
Tell you what. People like ME HAVE been searching and searching for the girlfriend, and girls that I have met at church, or through referrals, or from online dating websites or dating apps on the phone, either flaked out on me by eventually not responding to my text messages, or just meet up for one or two coffee or lunch dates, and they are not interested in meeting me again.
I honestly also stopped going to churches here (mainly the Korean churches). However, I don't know and maybe I should check out the churches here because I have recently moved to a new area of the city I live in. Maybe I should try and attend an American church.
This is why to a certain degree, I hate living in America. I really do.
It's so f***ing lonely coming home from my long ass shift at work, no one to talk to, no one to make me my breakfast or dinner.
Friends that I know who live around here are already engaged, and another friend is already married to a Taiwanese girl and has a baby daughter.
Why does murphy law and God have to be mean to me? It's like there is a curse on me to be single.
People here have opportunities to travel abroad to teach English. But is that a long-term type of job? I do not think so. English teaching jobs in East Asia also do NOT pay well. You only get room and board and maybe $1200-$1400 per month. That is crap money. Hence, it is hard for me to simply relocate to another country, preferrably SE Asia or even East Asia.