publicduende wrote:djfourmoney wrote: That's why I am not contacting any women I have seen on there.
Unemployed (Strike 1)
Live At Home (Strike 2)
No Car (Strike 3)
Why even bother????
LOL strike 2 and above all strike 3 are not such a big deal here. Only about a third of Londoners own a car. The sight of good looking young couples walking out of night bars and clubs hugging and snogging while waiting for the night bus is an iconic sight of London.
All of them are an issue here, because (1) is seen as a chronic problem for Black Men. Not a chronic problem for me personally but it is a proven fact its harder for Black Men to get hired. People round file your application or resume based on something as simple as your first/last name, several studies have been done.
(2) Is an issue, related to (1) but not really. Most seem to think you live there by choice (it is my choice) because you can't find a job or the job you have won't support you away from home. The problem is what a person paid is not where near what he needs to live. The basic job that pays $10 an hour which is $2 over the min wage in California is not enough for to you live alone on. If you attempt, you'll have to make a choice. If you don't buy a car (3), then your social options are extremely limited. This might not be the case for first generation immigrants who often have a community in which to socialize in that won't be effected much if you depend on public transportation.
That doesn't mean you still can't date, it just means its MUCH HARDER. As a majority of women will not find you suitable for even a mercy f**k.
I have no illusions of things being different. But the truth is, as you said living in London and not having a car is not seen as out of the ordinary, minimizing the damage. (1) is the most difficult to get around and often people think the worst. If you're Black and "Self Employed" its is assume its a euphemism for being involved in criminal behavior. I can diffuse much of this and I won't toot my own horn, but its only been an issue for one woman because she has visions of being wealthy actually, so that would make sense.
This is away from US sites like POF however, which like I said I consider a serious trash bin. Mostly filled with women in their late 30's and 40's with reduced expectations, widening hips and noticing the world notices them less and less with each passing year...