Going on a date - who pays?

[OzGuy]

I am a firm believer that women should pay their own way equally when going on a date to dinner etc. If they expect equality in everything else, then they also need to take on this responsibility. Now that women are working, there is simply no excuse for them not to pay their own way. They wanted to work, so now they pay.

Unfortunately there are still women who call themselves "feminists" and expect the man to pay for them. When challenging this, they like to use the excuse of "tradition". You want tradition? Ok then, go back to the kitchen, cook me meals, do my washing, ironing, clean the house, then maybe i'll think about paying for you.

These so called "feminists" love to cherry pick the "equality" that suits them. As a result, they conveniently left out the equality where both people pay their own way. I have even known some women that will not go on a second date if the man doesn't pay for them! If I happened to date one of these women, then they have done me a favour and I've dodged a bullet.

From the very first date, I will ensure that we go "dutch" and pay our own way by splitting the bill. You need to set them straight from the very start, or else they will take advantage of you. It also helps weed out the women that are only after you for money. If she doesn't want a second date as a result, then good riddance to her, she isn't worth your time.

I hear that German women always insist on going "dutch" with dates, and this is something else I love about them.

So what do you do?

[jamesbond]

I hear that German women always insist on going "dutch" with dates, and this is something else I love about them.

The more I hear about German women, the more I like them.

I haven't been on a "date" in a while but next time I do, I will incest the woman pay her half of the date. Especially if it's the first date, why should I pay for a first date when I don't even know if I like the person?

A lot of women in the US are so used to guys paying for every date, that they are "shocked" when they meet a guy who won't pay for their half of the date. Well, more men need to start doing this!

[OzGuy]

I hear that German women always insist on going "dutch" with dates, and this is something else I love about them.

The more I hear about German women, the more I like them.

Unfortunately I don't have any concrete evidence for this, its just what I've heard, so i'm not sure how correct it is. I certainly hope its true though.

Not sure if its the same with women, but the German men do prefer to go dutch. I have heard a number of Anglo women complaining about German men always wanting to split the bills. One was even shocked when he got out a calculator to work out exactly what was half. She was so disgusted that she never saw him again.

A lot of Anglo women will lie to try and test you. For example they might say "So shall we just split this?" when secretly they expect you to say "nah its alright, i'll get it". If you say "ok sure" (to splitting the bill), then many of them think you're cheap. Unlike Anglo women, German won't don't play these silly games and mean what they say. If they say "shall we split this?" then they really mean it. No hidden meanings, no bullshit.

[provocateur]

I don't like have to foot the bill for a woman's entertainment either. The method I describe below I would only use on Western, so-called "liberated" women that like to play the equal partners card the OP mentioned:

What I do is meet for an inexpensive date first (coffee, one round of drinks), and just grab the bill. If we don't hit it off, I am only in a few bucks. If we do hit it off to warrant meeting again, the second time I'll grab the bill. If the spark is still alive (i.e. I got some play), for the third date, when we talk on the phone or set up the next meeting, I'll ask, "so where are you taking me out for dinner this weekend?" in a half-joking, half-serious manner. If she balks, backs out, etc, I'll know I am dealing with a gal that is probably juicing me. In that case, NEXT!!! If all goes well on that second date though....I would have gotten the bang already.

While I could be hardcore and expect splitting the bill right from the start, I suspect I would not get as much action that way. YMMV.

[Capster78]

I guess it depends on what she does. If she does not make a lot of money at whatever job she has and I know I have extra cash laying around, I will foot the bill. But if we are fairly equal finacially I would expect her to pay her own bill.

[E_Irizarry]

I hear that German women always insist on going "dutch" with dates, and this is something else I love about them.

The more I hear about German women, the more I like them.

I haven't been on a "date" in a while but next time I do, I will incest the woman pay her half of the date. Especially if it's the first date, why should I pay for a first date when I don't even know if I like the person?

A lot of women in the US are so used to guys paying for every date, that they are "shocked" when they meet a guy who won't pay for their half of the date. Well, more men need to start doing this!

Let's not forget something, and I think many of the members whom date Black American women in the past would know, too: -- THAT many Black women prefer to pay for the dinner as their way of saying that they are strong and independent and/or better than the man whom they are paying all of the date for.

[emh]

I've gotten burnt too many times by paying for the date. Cause here's what happens next. When I contact the woman for a second date I got told "Oh sorry, I didn't think we had very good chemistry". Seriously??? WTF??? You let me pay for the date, even though you had obviously decided we didn't have enough chemistry for a second date. Never again!

I only pay when I'm in a 3rd world country where I know I have a lot more money than the woman I'm on a date with. And where things are so cheap it really doesn't matter.

[E_Irizarry]

I've gotten burnt too many times by paying for the date. Cause here's what happens next. When I contact the woman for a second date I got told "Oh sorry, I didn't think we had very good chemistry". Seriously??? WTF??? You let me pay for the date, even though you had obviously decided we didn't have enough chemistry for a second date. Never again!

I only pay when I'm in a 3rd world country where I know I have a lot more money than the woman I'm on a date with. And where things are so cheap it really doesn't matter.

Estas reflexionando sobre esas cosas por teniendo ellas en cuenta, y lo mas importante, ahora tu sepas mejor. Estas aprendiendo, mijo.
(Basically, you are living and learning from those experiences, dude.)

[OzGuy]

I've gotten burnt too many times by paying for the date. Cause here's what happens next. When I contact the woman for a second date I got told "Oh sorry, I didn't think we had very good chemistry". Seriously??? WTF??? You let me pay for the date, even though you had obviously decided we didn't have enough chemistry for a second date. Never again!

I only pay when I'm in a 3rd world country where I know I have a lot more money than the woman I'm on a date with. And where things are so cheap it really doesn't matter.

In Australia women deliberately go on a date to get a free dinner or drinks, even if they aren't really interested in the guy. They will even openly gloat about this to their friends. I have overheard some women saying "so I went on a date with a guy on the weekend, he wasn't really my type but I just agreed because I wasn't going to turn down a free dinner!"

Many of them also go to clubs and hang around the bar just to take advantage of lonely, desperate guys and get free drinks.

[pete98146]

I've gotten burnt too many times by paying for the date. Cause here's what happens next. When I contact the woman for a second date I got told "Oh sorry, I didn't think we had very good chemistry". Seriously??? WTF??? You let me pay for the date, even though you had obviously decided we didn't have enough chemistry for a second date. Never again!

I only pay when I'm in a 3rd world country where I know I have a lot more money than the woman I'm on a date with. And where things are so cheap it really doesn't matter.

In Australia women deliberately go on a date to get a free dinner or drinks, even if they aren't really interested in the guy. They will even openly gloat about this to their friends. I have overheard some women saying "so I went on a date with a guy on the weekend, he wasn't really my type but I just agreed because I wasn't going to turn down a free dinner!"

Many of them also go to clubs and hang around the bar just to take advantage of lonely, desperate guys and get free drinks.

This is why Tom Leykis preaches taking her out for coffee. A trip to Starbucks won't set you back more than $5. He says only the nerdly guys get stuck with $80 meal check and no nookie.

[All_That_Is_Man]

I'm turning over a new leaf. When I get back into dating again, I'm going to make it clear that my date and I will be going dutch. Paying for an entire date (especially when your date is capable of making money - or conning men/government programs for money) and knowing that it'll only lead to an awkward "Thanks. Bye." is just a shitty feeling. The only exception is if she's a foreign girl from a much poorer country.

[provocateur]

I've gotten burnt too many times by paying for the date. Cause here's what happens next. When I contact the woman for a second date I got told "Oh sorry, I didn't think we had very good chemistry". Seriously??? WTF??? You let me pay for the date, even though you had obviously decided we didn't have enough chemistry for a second date. Never again!

I only pay when I'm in a 3rd world country where I know I have a lot more money than the woman I'm on a date with. And where things are so cheap it really doesn't matter.

In Australia women deliberately go on a date to get a free dinner or drinks, even if they aren't really interested in the guy. They will even openly gloat about this to their friends. I have overheard some women saying "so I went on a date with a guy on the weekend, he wasn't really my type but I just agreed because I wasn't going to turn down a free dinner!"

Many of them also go to clubs and hang around the bar just to take advantage of lonely, desperate guys and get free drinks.

This is why Tom Leykis preaches taking her out for coffee. A trip to Starbucks won't set you back more than $5. He says only the nerdly guys get stuck with $80 meal check and no nookie.

Amen. Praise be to Leykis. No more than $10 for coffees---can't beat that. This is especially true if you have not met in person before. After finally seeing her walk in the Starkbucks, you be aghast at just how big her ass is, or that her teeth are too crooked. I have smoothly bailed on bad coffee dates in less than 30 minutes. I've save lots of money (and face) that way.

[OzGuy]

[OzGuy]

Also here is a great article about why you should NEVER pay for women on a date.

http://au.askmen.com/dating/curtsmith_1 ... dvice.html

[C.J.]

Haha, funny stuff.

When I go to dinner with someone, I always ask them to "invest" in our time together, at least 1/3 of their eating cost and I pay the rest. If they do pony up the cash, then I try to see them again. If they don't, I quickly bail.