Looking for love in all the wrong places.

[Mercury]

That is exactly what Americans want lonely guys to believe who go to bars, clubs, restaurants, spring break parties, and such. But as we here at Happierabroad know, you are not looking for love in all the wrong places, you are looking for love in the wrong country! In America, you will not find love at a bar. You will not find love at church. Not at a nightclub, not at a concert, not at a strip club, not at a spring break party, not at a shopping mall, not at Starbuck's, not in a "social group," not at a library, not at a beach, not on a boat, not on a bus, not on a train, not in a park, not at a forest preserve, not at a gym, not on a college campus, not anywhere.

Those useless gurus that give worthless talk about finding the one at Starbuck's or at a library, church, or shopping mall, the info they ever give is nothing but a bandaid on a dynamite explosion injury.

[flowerthief00]

If you'd like to know why dating & courtship is broken this article on modern dating practices is an important clue.

We have committed to the egalitarian way of doing things. Men and women are supposed to behave like equals now. Yet even in the most progressive cities we are hypocritically falling into backwards practices.

Women still expecting men to lead, make the first move, pay for dates and garbage.
Men still pursuing younger women who can't possibly be considered their equal.
Self-described feminists wanting men to be more "chivalrous".

What on earth is going on?? Only LGBTQ, according to the article, are getting it right.

Single men, when was the last time a woman asked you out? Single women, when was the last time you asked a man out? It should be happening 50% of the time. AT LEAST 50% of the time, considering how unsafe it has become for men to do the pursuing post #metoo. Why isn't it?

I'm a glad a feminist sociologist is posing these questions. You demanded we change things. Now you had better damn well fix things before the birth rate falls to 0.

[Mercury]

Women still expecting men to lead, make the first move, pay for dates and garbage.
Men still pursuing younger women who can't possibly be considered their equal.
Self-described feminists wanting men to be more "chivalrous".

Because American women are entertained and get a huge ego boost every time they see another man getting the cuffs slapped on, thrown into the back of a police vehicle kicking and screaming like a lunatic, and hauled off to prison, and then seeing on the news, the guy's outburst in prison. They know that any form of non-business communications between a man and a woman under Federal law is sexual harassment. American women expect the man to be man enough to face 375 years to life in the Federal supermax prison and even the death penalty. Any man not man enough to face the electric chair for asking a woman out is considered worthy of immediate public execution; in other words, to American women, you either die in the chair for asking a woman out, or you die by public execution for not making the first move. And yes, I know what you guys are thinking, and you are correct in thinking that American women want all men dead and are entertained watching men getting destroyed. American women are man-destroyers, and they are proud of it!

And American women not only expect the man to pay for dates, they expect the MAN to take her to the most expensive, luxurious place in the nation, they expect the man to be financially capable of living in Hidden Hills, California! And they expect the man to drive the biggest, loudest, fastest, most modern, and most expensive souped up luxury sports cars on the road. Lambo doors, velvet seats, dark tinted windows, top speed of 300 or faster, roars like a hundred Honda motorcycles put together,

What on earth is going on?? Only LGBTQ, according to the article, are getting it right.

Single men, when was the last time a woman asked you out? Single women, when was the last time you asked a man out? It should be happening 50% of the time. AT LEAST 50% of the time, considering how unsafe it has become for men to do the pursuing post #metoo. Why isn't it?

I'm a glad a feminist sociologist is posing these questions. You demanded we change things. Now you had better damn well fix things before the birth rate falls to 0.

Really, single women asking a man out ought to be happening 100% of the time. Unfortunately, even that won't always work as most American women are obese and totally unattractive. And the obese ones will get rejected, not because they are coming on too strongly or have bad hygiene. It's because their tremendous girth is an iron wall keeping the men away. And when they approach the guys, that iron wall generated by her massive girth becomes an iron prow, shoving the guys out of the way and away from her, just like how a ship's prow pushes water out of the way and away from the hull as the ship moves through the water.

And the attractive ones, they don't ask the guys out because American women hate men, and once again, American women, especially the attractive ones that aren't overweight, they get a kick out of seeing another man under arrest for sexual harassment, and American women giggle, tease, and make fun of guys they see on their way to prison, especially when the women called the police and had the guy arrested.

[MrMan]

Women still expecting men to lead, make the first move, pay for dates and garbage.
Men still pursuing younger women who can't possibly be considered their equal.
Self-described feminists wanting men to be more "chivalrous".

Because American women are entertained and get a huge ego boost every time they see another man getting the cuffs slapped on, thrown into the back of a police vehicle kicking and screaming like a lunatic, and hauled off to prison, and then seeing on the news, the guy's outburst in prison.

Just about every post of yours has dystopian exaggerations like this. I am curious, though. Do you think this is reality? Do you think all American women get a boost to their ego when they see a man arrested? What do you base this on?

They know that any form of non-business communications between a man and a woman under Federal law is sexual harassment. American women expect the man to be man enough to face 375 years to life in the Federal supermax prison and even the death penalty. Any man not man enough to face the electric chair for asking a woman out is considered worthy of immediate public execution; in other words, to American women, you either die in the chair for asking a woman out, or you die by public execution for not making the first move. And yes, I know what you guys are thinking, and you are correct in thinking that American women want all men dead and are entertained watching men getting destroyed. American women are man-destroyers, and they are proud of it!

Do you really think this represents reality-- that there is a death penalty for asking a co-worker out on a date?

And American women not only expect the man to pay for dates, they expect the MAN to take her to the most expensive, luxurious place in the nation, they expect the man to be financially capable of living in Hidden Hills, California! And they expect the man to drive the biggest, loudest, fastest, most modern, and most expensive souped up luxury sports cars on the road. Lambo doors, velvet seats, dark tinted windows, top speed of 300 or faster, roars like a hundred Honda motorcycles put together,

Do you live in Beverly Hills or an expensive neighborhood in New York City? Do you really believe this is true, or is this exaggeration in your mind?

If you ask a woman out (which you might not do if you think you risk the electric chair) don't you think you should pay since you asked her out?

Really, single women asking a man out ought to be happening 100% of the time. Unfortunately, even that won't always work as most American women are obese and totally unattractive. And the obese ones will get rejected, not because they are coming on too strongly or have bad hygiene. It's because their tremendous girth is an iron wall keeping the men away. And when they approach the guys, that iron wall generated by her massive girth becomes an iron prow, shoving the guys out of the way and away from her, just like how a ship's prow pushes water out of the way and away from the hull as the ship moves through the water.

I am glad women don't go around asking men out all the time. I didn't like fat unattractive girls telling me they liked me or trying to ask me out when I was young. You look and act the same to them as you do to the pretty skinny ones, so if they ask you out, you have to say no or go out with them or come up with a lame excuse. Women do that now, and men feel rejected. But isn't it better that the man gets to choose who to roll the dice with rather than having to reject the girls he doesn't like?

And the attractive ones, they don't ask the guys out because American women hate men, and once again, American women, especially the attractive ones that aren't overweight, they get a kick out of seeing another man under arrest for sexual harassment, and American women giggle, tease, and make fun of guys they see on their way to prison, especially when the women called the police and had the guy arrested.

I haven't seen any men go to prison for asking a woman out. There is one poster who followed women around with a camera who finally faced charges for doing so with an underaged teen because he aired some comments about her. That was an extreme case. Have you ever seen anyone else arrested for sexual harassment? Have you seen women giggle?

The single women may actually respond positively toward a man they find attractive. Fortunately, women have varying tastes and a man can overcome shortcomings in looks, height, etc. by having an outgoing personality, demonstrating leadership, alpha traits, etc. with certain women if whatever he does pushes the right buttons in her psyche.

Instead of approaching strange beautiful women on the street, it may work better if you get involved in activities or organizations where you interact with women. If your first conversation with women is as negative as your posts, that might turn a lot of women off. Maybe Goth chicks would go for it.

[Yohan]

That is exactly what Americans want lonely guys to believe who go to bars, clubs, restaurants, spring break parties, and such. But as we here at Happierabroad know, you are not looking for love in all the wrong places, you are looking for love in the wrong country! In America, you will not find love at a bar. You will not find love at church. Not at a nightclub, not at a concert, not at a strip club, not at a spring break party, not at a shopping mall, not at Starbuck's, not in a "social group," not at a library, not at a beach, not on a boat, not on a bus, not on a train, not in a park, not at a forest preserve, not at a gym, not on a college campus, not anywhere.

Those useless gurus that give worthless talk about finding the one at Starbuck's or at a library, church, or shopping mall, the info they ever give is nothing but a bandaid on a dynamite explosion injury.

Mercury: You are not looking for love in the wrong places, you are looking for love in the wrong country!

This is finally a comment from Mercury, which I do NOT find to be hopelessly exaggerated.
It's not only about USA, it's the same in Western Europe too.

The dating scene is totally broken, legally seen very risky for men and basically open only for thugs who don't care if something is going wrong.

I found especially the 'first contact' as highly difficult, almost impossible. No idea where to begin where you can start to search for any nice local woman in Europe.

Many girls have regular sex since their 13th birthday, contact the school nurse for contraceptives, have multiple boyfriends and I never met even a single woman in my life in Europe who was single, available, lonely looking for a straight man and whose second sentence was not about 'please borrow (=give me without any intention to pay back) a not so small sum of money or asking for expensive gifts.

My advice for men is either stay single in Western Europe and Northern America - or move away to any other country outside of this pro-feminist zone.

I was choosing the second option - to move out and never return. No regrets after more than 40 years.

[Yohan]

Just about every post of yours has dystopian exaggerations like this.
-----
Do you really think this represents reality-- that there is a death penalty for asking a co-worker out on a date?
-----
Do you live in Beverly Hills or an expensive neighborhood in New York City? Do you really believe this is true, or is this exaggeration in your mind?
-----
If you ask a woman out (which you might not do if you think you risk the electric chair) don't you think you should pay since you asked her out?
-----
I am glad women don't go around asking men out all the time. I didn't like fat unattractive girls telling me they liked me or trying to ask me out when I was young. You look and act the same to them as you do to the pretty skinny ones, so if they ask you out, you have to say no or go out with them or come up with a lame excuse. Women do that now, and men feel rejected. But isn't it better that the man gets to choose who to roll the dice with rather than having to reject the girls he doesn't like?
-----
I haven't seen any men go to prison for asking a woman out. ..... Have you ever seen anyone else arrested for sexual harassment? Have you seen women giggle?

The single women may actually respond positively toward a man they find attractive. Fortunately, women have varying tastes and a man can overcome shortcomings in looks, height, etc. by having an outgoing personality, demonstrating leadership, alpha traits, etc. with certain women if whatever he does pushes the right buttons in her psyche.

Instead of approaching strange beautiful women on the street, it may work better if you get involved in activities or organizations where you interact with women. If your first conversation with women is as negative as your posts, that might turn a lot of women off. Maybe Goth chicks would go for it.

Sorry, but if I read your reply to Mercury, I can only say very much you write here is not true.
Somewhat astonished that you write something like that, as you are married with a foreign woman (international/interracial) and not with a typical US-girl (of any race/ethnicity) next door.

Mercury's comments are exaggerated and sometimes up to a ridiculous extent, but there is really some truth in it what he says.

There is no death penalty if you as a man try to approach a female co-worker and ask her out - LOL. However it is risky and stupid to do this. You might be fired the same day and be jobless, and even worse the woman might claim sexual harassment, unwanted attention and similar BS and you might find yourself in serious legal trouble in USA.

In Europe which society is not into firing co-workers or filing lawsuits, you might become the target of fun and scorn in the company you work if something is going wrong - despite you had good intention. - And yes, happened to me too and I never tried this again in my life. Dating at the workplace is an absolute NO!

About men who can overcome shortcomings in their looks, yes, it is amazing to see how many women will offer love going through the wallet. The question remains however, how a young men - like I myself many years ago - can own so much money. I was unable to overcome my 'shortcomings'.

To approach unknown women in the street is ridiculous, this does not work of course, I agree. However to get involved in activities or organizations is quite similar to dating at the workplace. Most women are anyway not available, and should you dare to talk too much, you will be kicked out anyway....

I have absolutely no idea, where I could start to date any woman in Western Europe. I never made it up to any girlfriend not even for 30 minutes. However this changed drastically, when starting to look around in foreign countries trying to contact foreign women.

[MrMan]

Just about every post of yours has dystopian exaggerations like this.
-----
Do you really think this represents reality-- that there is a death penalty for asking a co-worker out on a date?
-----
Do you live in Beverly Hills or an expensive neighborhood in New York City? Do you really believe this is true, or is this exaggeration in your mind?
-----
If you ask a woman out (which you might not do if you think you risk the electric chair) don't you think you should pay since you asked her out?
-----
I am glad women don't go around asking men out all the time. I didn't like fat unattractive girls telling me they liked me or trying to ask me out when I was young. You look and act the same to them as you do to the pretty skinny ones, so if they ask you out, you have to say no or go out with them or come up with a lame excuse. Women do that now, and men feel rejected. But isn't it better that the man gets to choose who to roll the dice with rather than having to reject the girls he doesn't like?
-----
I haven't seen any men go to prison for asking a woman out. ..... Have you ever seen anyone else arrested for sexual harassment? Have you seen women giggle?

The single women may actually respond positively toward a man they find attractive. Fortunately, women have varying tastes and a man can overcome shortcomings in looks, height, etc. by having an outgoing personality, demonstrating leadership, alpha traits, etc. with certain women if whatever he does pushes the right buttons in her psyche.

Instead of approaching strange beautiful women on the street, it may work better if you get involved in activities or organizations where you interact with women. If your first conversation with women is as negative as your posts, that might turn a lot of women off. Maybe Goth chicks would go for it.

Sorry, but if I read your reply to Mercury, I can only say very much you write here is not true.
Somewhat astonished that you write something like that, as you are married with a foreign woman (international/interracial) and not with a typical US-girl (of any race/ethnicity) next door.

Mercury's comments are exaggerated and sometimes up to a ridiculous extent, but there is really some truth in it what he says.

There is no death penalty if you as a man try to approach a female co-worker and ask her out - LOL. However it is risky and stupid to do this. You might be fired the same day and be jobless, and even worse the woman might claim sexual harassment, unwanted attention and similar BS and you might find yourself in serious legal trouble in USA.

In Europe which society is not into firing co-workers or filing lawsuits, you might become the target of fun and scorn in the company you work if something is going wrong - despite you had good intention. - And yes, happened to me too and I never tried this again in my life. Dating at the workplace is an absolute NO!

About men who can overcome shortcomings in their looks, yes, it is amazing to see how many women will offer love going throught the wallet. The question remains however, how a young men - like I myself many years ago - can own so much money. I was unable to overcome my 'shortcomings'.

To approach unknown women in the street is ridiculous, this does not work of course, I agree. However to get involved in activities or organizations is quite similar to dating at the workplace. Most women are anyway not available, and should you dare to talk too much, you will be kicked out anyway....

I have absolutely no idea, where I could start to date any woman in Western Europe. I never made it up to any girlfriend not even for 30 minutes. However this changed drastically, when starting to look around in foreign countries trying to contact foreign women.

Somehow much of the population of the US manages to get into some kind of relationship, boyfriend-girlfriend, marriage, etc. And some people even meet at work.

[Yohan]

Somehow much of the population of the US manages to get into some kind of relationship, boyfriend-girlfriend, marriage, etc. And some people even meet at work.

Somehow...some....
Might be that some people manage some kind of relationship, but how many of these contacts break down in no time?
There is no safe space in USA for men to enjoy dating local women. You never know what might happen next.

USA is well-known for its large number of male citizens looking for foreign women overseas, and it is the only country I know (except North Korea) which has laws to make international/interracial dating difficult for them... US-feminists are strongly complaining about that.

The US citizen has to provide all his personal data even before he is even sure about that the person on the other side of the world is even existing.
US citizens have only short vacation, not so easy to find international contacts without help of brokers.

The International Marriage Broker Regulation Act (IMBRA) requires that the U.S. Government provide foreign fiancé(e)s and spouses immigrating to the United States information about their legal rights as well as criminal or domestic violence histories of their U.S. citizen fiancé(e)s and spouses.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Internati ... lation_Act

Interesting that such a law protects the foreign women more than the US-male citizen. He has to offer all information to her, but she has no obligation at all to disclose anything about her....she might even not exist, 'she' might be only a fake profile....

In this sense, I fully agree with 'Mercury', men in Western society are considered as 2nd class people.

[MrMan]

Somehow much of the population of the US manages to get into some kind of relationship, boyfriend-girlfriend, marriage, etc. And some people even meet at work.

Somehow...some....
Might be that some people manage some kind of relationship, but how many of these contacts break down in no time?
There is no safe space in USA for men to enjoy dating local women. You never know what might happen next.

USA is well-known for its large number of male citizens looking for foreign women overseas, and it is the only country I know (except North Korea) which has laws to make international/interracial dating difficult for them... US-feminists are strongly complaining about that.

The US citizen has to provide all his personal data even before he is even sure about that the person on the other side of the world is even existing.
US citizens have only short vacation, not so easy to find international contacts without help of brokers.

The International Marriage Broker Regulation Act (IMBRA) requires that the U.S. Government provide foreign fiancé(e)s and spouses immigrating to the United States information about their legal rights as well as criminal or domestic violence histories of their U.S. citizen fiancé(e)s and spouses.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Internati ... lation_Act

Interesting that such a law protects the foreign women more than the US-male citizen. He has to offer all information to her, but she has no obligation at all to disclose anything about her....she might even not exist, 'she' might be only a fake profile....

In this sense, I fully agree with 'Mercury', men in Western society are considered as 2nd class people.

Does that law apply to cases other than men using marriage brokers? What about men doing online dating on international sites?

How does this work? The US government gives a bride applying for a visa some long document about her rights and domestic abuse, and her husband just says, 'Sign here and here' and we chop down more trees and throw away more paper?

There are some obnoxious laws. In one state where my wife and I had one of our children, someone came into the hospital room and asked her if she was experiencing domestic abuse. That's kind of obnoxious.

[Mercury]

it is risky and stupid to do this. You will be fired the same day and be jobless, and even worse the woman will claim sexual harassment, unwanted attention and similar BS and you will find yourself in serious legal trouble in USA.

Somehow much of the population of the US manages to get into some kind of relationship, boyfriend-girlfriend, marriage, etc. And some people even meet at work.

The men in America that ask women out today, over 99.9% of them already have felony records and prison records. Many have already done years, even decades, in prison for downright violent offenses like armed robbery, armed carjacking, shootings, assault with a deadly weapon, even firearm attack on a cop and have already been, as one might say, "toughened up" by prison. To American women, getting in trouble for robbery, assault with a deadly weapon, grand theft auto, and such means practically nothing. But getting in trouble for asking a woman out on a date is over a thousand times worse and bigger than a terrorist bombing at an elementary school.

[jamesbond]

Johnny Lee - "Lookin' for Love" (In all the wrong places).

[Yohan]

it is risky and stupid to do this. You will be fired the same day and be jobless, and even worse the woman will claim sexual harassment, unwanted attention and similar BS and you will find yourself in serious legal trouble in USA.

Somehow much of the population of the US manages to get into some kind of relationship, boyfriend-girlfriend, marriage, etc. And some people even meet at work.

The men in America that ask women out today, over 99.9% of them already have felony records and prison records. Many have already done years, even decades, in prison for downright violent offenses like armed robbery, armed carjacking, shootings, assault with a deadly weapon, even firearm attack on a cop and have already been, as one might say, "toughened up" by prison. To American women, getting in trouble for robbery, assault with a deadly weapon, grand theft auto, and such means practically nothing. But getting in trouble for asking a woman out on a date is over a thousand times worse and bigger than a terrorist bombing at an elementary school.

Mercury, you were mixing up the name of the posters. I repeat your comment again with the correct names.

Your comment is of course - as usual - strongly exaggerated but also contains a bit of truth.

To approach a woman - regardless if she never has seen you before or if she knows you from somewhere) for a private talk, to ask her out in Western countries, even for a totally harmless activity, like a walk in a park, or for a chat in a coffee shop (which makes it clear, NOT for a meeting in private room, but being always in a public area) can bring you in serious trouble.

Of course, if you are a man who owns nothing, is a nothing, just out of jail, jobless, even homeless, he can go ahead. Why not?
Such useless men ALWAYS have plenty of girls around them.

But if you have a regular job, a little savings, own a home....stay away....it might end badly.

The problem is you cannot predict what is next. The woman might punch you in the face, yelling at you to f*** off, she might tearfully cry 'stranger' and some boyfriends or do-gooders will show up and send you with broken bones to a hospital. She can report you to police or at least to your employer claiming improper behavior or even worse sexual harassment....and even if police finds out the accusation is false, you will be jobless with your picture in every local newspaper....

Just read the news, how many men are in trouble now for something they 'maybe' did - no proof required - 20 or 30 years ago.

Nowadays every woman wants to be a enticing 'model' but feels herself 'violated' and 'abused' - despite willingly taking money for her services. Otherwise if no man care about her, the same women feel to be 'ignored' and 'discriminated'....

Whatever a man is doing, it's his fault - but if you ask me to 'ignore' women is still the better - and much safer - way to go.

There is now another thread with this forum, women complaining 'I have no friends' - and I know why...
viewtopic.php?style=1&f=1&t=43023

[thestyledare]

1. “The purpose of our lives is to be happy.”
2. “Life is what happens when you’re busy making other plans.”
3. “Get busy living or get busy dying.” — Stephen King

4. “You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.”

5. “Many of life’s failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.”– Thomas A. Edison