Anyone else struggles in finding High Value male friends?

[ArchibaultNew]

Hey guys,

I've had this issue where I can't seem to find High Value Male friends.What I mean by this idea is guys who can help you become successful. Or pick up girls with you, organize parties and events with hot girls.

The problem with many of the "Modern guys" out there are either:

Low Value(Pessimistic, Over politically correct they don't want to do anything to offend women, hyper critical of you, Competitive towards you, for instance, with pick up students we can't hang out since most of them are trying to compete against me.

Homosexual(You might think I am making this up, however, homosexuals are much more common nowadays and they seem to be overly present in many areas like I joined a acting class and half the guys were married the other homosexual.

Max from RSD seem to have this problem where he had male friend who were constantly trying to bring him down. I'm not saying that guys are trying to bring me down. For instance, I made friends with a white photographer and he was constantly talking about "exploitation" of women in photography...pc stuff like that. I also made an Asian pick up friend and he was always talking about how success is very hard..etc

I feel the only guys who could be friends with me are African-American(I am not black but African culture seems to bring out more "Alpha" type guys).

The types of friends I want:
1-Club Promoter: Knows a lot of girls.
2-Photographer: Takes pictures of a lot of girls.
3-Mongers: Bangs a lot of hookers.
4-Sugar Daddy: Bangs a lot of SBs.

You might be surprised I didn't include "Pick Up Artist" the reason is that most of those guys are low value and will try to compete with you.

[GerardButler]

Well most of this is fairly accurate. Most guys are low value, especially in the manosphere. See: https://culturewhiz.org/forum/topic/wha ... manosphere African-American culture is definitely more real, creative and "alpha". It developed under the hardship of oppression and alpha staus comes from overcoming difficult obstacles as it leads to increased understanding and creativity. According to Nietzsche, suffering is a necessary ingredient for "alpha" status. He argues that those who are able to weather the trials and tribulations of life (which is painful) are the ones who will be able to achieve the most success. For example, great art represents a person’s most deeply-held and personal thoughts and feelings and that it is only through pain and struggle that they can develop true potential. Nietzsche insists that greatness comes from within and cannot be bought or achieved easily. He argues that if we learn to resist our pain and accept it as part of life, we can become stronger people. In fact, he says that the only way to overcome our sufferings is by facing them head-on and learning from them.

[Shemp]

Based on OP's list of reasons for wanting "friends", PUA is exactly the type guys OP should be trying to meet with and if PUAs out compete OP and steal all the girls, what does that say about OP? He's lower value than the PUAs is what it says. @Vogager1 is definitely a low value man (as is PAG aka @GeraldButler, with whom Voyager1 once engaged in an epic pissing contest on this forum, wish i had the link to that thread, anyone can help find it?), but he does occasionally give advice that is useful. In particular, OP should watch those YouTubes videis of JohnnyFD and BaldAndBankrupt that Voyager1 recommends to see a good example of a relationship of male "friends" based on parties, girls, etc. JohnnyFD and B&B have a quid pro relationship, in that the parties are only interested in the other person for the value they bring to the relationship. If value drops, other person is discarded like a used piece of toilet paper. This is not what i would call true friendship, where parties don't care about each other's "value".

[MrMan]

Hey guys,

I've had this issue where I can't seem to find High Value Male friends.What I mean by this idea is guys who can help you become successful. Or pick up girls with you, organize parties and events with hot girls.

The types of friends I want:
1-Club Promoter: Knows a lot of girls.
2-Photographer: Takes pictures of a lot of girls.
3-Mongers: Bangs a lot of hookers.
4-Sugar Daddy: Bangs a lot of SBs.

Those don't sound like they are necessarily the kind of guys who would help you be successful, unless you want to be a club promoter, photographer..... or unless you want to fornicate, which isn't really success. When I read the first line, I thought you meant succeed in leadership, career, etc.

The title did remind me that I don't keep up with friends well. In the last town I lived in, I was unemployed for a while, and there were a couple of Hispanic guys I met at church that I got to know, we had them in their kids over to the house from time to time. They live a couple of hours away. I was thinking of calling them over the holidays, and plan to keep calling them. I should probably calls some old friends from other places I've lived.

I do get interaction with other men through church activities, but haven't developed a 'best friend' type relationship. I probably know our pastor as well as anyone else there. We had him over for dinner last night with his wife. @fschmidt keeps talking about Anabaptists. He was raised Mennonite. He's a really nice guy, humble, with a lot of admirable characteristics, about a year younger than I am. We actually used to go to a church that was a sort of Anabaptist offshoot that allowed for political activity for a while. I go to a cell group where we study the Bible and pray together. There are men in that group. We don't stay to midnight or later like the Hispanics used to do when we hosted meetings in that last town.

I use social media as a bit of a social outlet, and within a family I get a lot of social interaction. I call my parents every week. We've got a meeting for youth in the neighborhood and community in our house every week. So I get social interaction, but having time for grown male friends my age is a bit difficult. My son is a young man, and I should probably spend dedicated time with him and prioritize that over other male friendships.

[MarcosZeitola]

I have a different definition of what makes a male friend "high value". Clubbing, partying and picking up random sluts doesn't bring me joy anymore; I have outgrown all of that already. High quality friends for me are men who have dreams, careers, businesses, who work hard, are responsible members of their community or church, who are respectable family men with dreams of their own, who I can occasionally have a drink with and talk shit with.

The saddest thing I can imagine is a group of aging manwhores going to bars together to pick up loose women and brag about it afterwards. It's much more rewarding to just have a barbeque with some dad friends, banter, drink and have a good time with friends and family.

[Outcast9428]

@MarcosZeitola @MrMan Yeah I disagree with the premise that a high value male friend is somebody to get something from so to speak. In general I consider a high value male friend to be someone I can be my full authentic self around, someone who is loyal, will not betray me and will try to the best of his ability to aid in my success in life (even if he can’t contribute much), and at this point… It might surprise some people to say this… But punctuality. Over the years I’ve noticed that you can directly measure the quality of your relationship with someone, whether they are a male friend or a girlfriend by how punctual they are. Somebody who values you tries to show up on time, they do not wait days and days to text you back and if you ever call they make sure to answer. If they are late to something they usually tell you ahead of time if they will be late. And if they are it’s usually only 5-15 minutes late. They also rarely cancel things you’ve planned on doing.

I’ve had friends in the past who would agree to doing things but then cancel the day we were supposed to meet. Or they would arrive like an hour or two late and act like they did nothing wrong. It’s like they weren’t even trying to show up on time.

Some people may think this is a small thing to focus on. But every friend, as well as my current girlfriend, who was consistently punctual has been good in every other way as well. They’ve been loyal, accepting, and truly authentic friends. Every friend I knew who wasn’t punctual stabbed me in the back at some point or was a generally selfish friend who wanted to use me instead of being friends with me. My ex girlfriend had some issues with punctuality as well whereas my girlfriend now usually answers texts immediately, is already waiting at the front door when I come to her house or immediately comes over to my house when we talk about hanging out.

[MrPeabody]

Hey guys,

I've had this issue where I can't seem to find High Value Male friends.What I mean by this idea is guys who can help you become successful. Or pick up girls with you, organize parties and events with hot girls.

The problem with many of the "Modern guys" out there are either:

Low Value(Pessimistic, Over politically correct they don't want to do anything to offend women, hyper critical of you, Competitive towards you, for instance, with pick up students we can't hang out since most of them are trying to compete against me.

Homosexual(You might think I am making this up, however, homosexuals are much more common nowadays and they seem to be overly present in many areas like I joined a acting class and half the guys were married the other homosexual.

Max from RSD seem to have this problem where he had male friend who were constantly trying to bring him down. I'm not saying that guys are trying to bring me down. For instance, I made friends with a white photographer and he was constantly talking about "exploitation" of women in photography...pc stuff like that. I also made an Asian pick up friend and he was always talking about how success is very hard..etc

I feel the only guys who could be friends with me are African-American(I am not black but African culture seems to bring out more "Alpha" type guys).

The types of friends I want:
1-Club Promoter: Knows a lot of girls.
2-Photographer: Takes pictures of a lot of girls.
3-Mongers: Bangs a lot of hookers.
4-Sugar Daddy: Bangs a lot of SBs.

You might be surprised I didn't include "Pick Up Artist" the reason is that most of those guys are low value and will try to compete with you.

I agree, Getting some black friends is an excellent idea. PUAs are white boy geeks who don’t have a clue how to attract women. And those are the teachers.

[ArchibaultNew]

Well most of this is fairly accurate. Most guys are low value, especially in the manosphere. See: https://culturewhiz.org/forum/topic/wha ... manosphere African-American culture is definitely more real, creative and "alpha". It developed under the hardship of oppression and alpha staus comes from overcoming difficult obstacles as it leads to increased understanding and creativity. According to Nietzsche, suffering is a necessary ingredient for "alpha" status. He argues that those who are able to weather the trials and tribulations of life (which is painful) are the ones who will be able to achieve the most success. For example, great art represents a person’s most deeply-held and personal thoughts and feelings and that it is only through pain and struggle that they can develop true potential. Nietzsche insists that greatness comes from within and cannot be bought or achieved easily. He argues that if we learn to resist our pain and accept it as part of life, we can become stronger people. In fact, he says that the only way to overcome our sufferings is by facing them head-on and learning from them.

Hey man, great comment. I agree with many of your observations. To me black guys are more pragmatic like, "let's get the job" type of mindset. Whites Americans are too "moralisics" and "virtue signaling." Meanwhile, Asians are "too pessimistic" and "hyper critical."

For instance in a Pick Up scenario:
Me:Hey guys, let's approach that girl.

Black guys: Sure, let's approach her.
White guys: Let's not, We would creep her out, how would she feel? We can't "bother" her.
Asian guys: We can't do it, we are not attractive enough, we might never be attractive enough,
Some India guys (Indians are mixed bag): We can't approach her, what would our families think? We need to watch for our reputation.

[Lucas88]

@ArchibaultNew

I think that the best way to make friends with high-value dudes is by becoming part of a brotherhood. Find a circle of dudes who are bonded together through some shared activity, preferably one with a constructive focus. For example, you could join a MMA gym, CrossFit or something similar. Through such a brotherhood you will have a common interest and a feeling of mutual respect. Making friends should be relatively easy. Then, once you are accepted into the group, you might be able to organize night's out with your new brothers and pick up women together.

It's often like this at martial arts schools and among guys who do wrestling and Jiujitsu. They'll train together and become friends and then, after a few months of knowing each other, go out to nightclubs together or cruise the streets for hookers. In my experience, you meet good dudes at martial arts gyms.

[GerardButler]

Well most of this is fairly accurate. Most guys are low value, especially in the manosphere. See: https://culturewhiz.org/forum/topic/wha ... manosphere African-American culture is definitely more real, creative and "alpha". It developed under the hardship of oppression and alpha staus comes from overcoming difficult obstacles as it leads to increased understanding and creativity. According to Nietzsche, suffering is a necessary ingredient for "alpha" status. He argues that those who are able to weather the trials and tribulations of life (which is painful) are the ones who will be able to achieve the most success. For example, great art represents a person’s most deeply-held and personal thoughts and feelings and that it is only through pain and struggle that they can develop true potential. Nietzsche insists that greatness comes from within and cannot be bought or achieved easily. He argues that if we learn to resist our pain and accept it as part of life, we can become stronger people. In fact, he says that the only way to overcome our sufferings is by facing them head-on and learning from them.

Hey man, great comment. I agree with many of your observations. To me black guys are more pragmatic like, "let's get the job" type of mindset. Whites Americans are too "moralisics" and "virtue signaling." Meanwhile, Asians are "too pessimistic" and "hyper critical."

For instance in a Pick Up scenario:
Me:Hey guys, let's approach that girl.

Black guys: Sure, let's approach her.
White guys: Let's not, We would creep her out, how would she feel? We can't "bother" her.
Asian guys: We can't do it, we are not attractive enough, we might never be attractive enough,
Some India guys (Indians are mixed bag): We can't approach her, what would our families think? We need to watch for our reputation.

Yes, this translates to lame versus cool.

[ArchibaultNew]

@ArchibaultNew

I think that the best way to make friends with high-value dudes is by becoming part of a brotherhood. Find a circle of dudes who are bonded together through some shared activity, preferably one with a constructive focus. For example, you could join a MMA gym, CrossFit or something similar. Through such a brotherhood you will have a common interest and a feeling of mutual respect. Making friends should be relatively easy. Then, once you are accepted into the group, you might be able to organize night's out with your new brothers and pick up women together.

It's often like this at martial arts schools and among guys who do wrestling and Jiujitsu. They'll train together and become friends and then, after a few months of knowing each other, go out to nightclubs together or cruise the streets for hookers. In my experience, you meet good dudes at martial arts gyms.

Great idea man, I think I should start chill out more at Martial Arts Clubs. It seems like its a good move.

[Natural_Born_Cynic]

There is no high value male friends. You have to put on your bootstraps and conquer on your own. Eagles fly alone. Otherwise you end up like one of those flocks of birds that is going to a same direction. You end up mediocre, conformist, spineless coward with unfulfilled potential.