publicduende wrote: ↑
June 12th, 2018, 10:22 pm
Winston wrote: ↑
June 12th, 2018, 11:09 am
, you forget that Lisa was not normal either. She had bipolar or manic depressive disorder. Remember? Have you met someone with bipolar? They eventually jettison everyone from their life and can't tolerate people for long. They are passive aggressive in that way. Plus they seem to have multiple personalities. I noticed that Lisa was like 3 or 4 people in one. She constantly shifted between personalities. Also, she changed her mind like every hour or so. Normal people may change their mind occasionally about things, but not every hour. That's a clear sign of mental disorder. That's why she got a divorced. Her husband got tired of her mental illnesses and personality disorder and began to ignore her. She admitted that later on, so he wasn't a dick after all like she tried to make him out to be. And she admitted her mental disorders to me too.
Oh I see. I didn't know this detail. Well, people with bipolar disorder can be very unreliable and difficult to interact with. It's good that she was honest with you about her problem, though. Not many people would.
Winston wrote: ↑
June 12th, 2018, 11:09 am
I tend to attract girls with mental problems, because such people can be very charming and magnetic when they are on their "up side". Whereas people who are very square, consistent and responsible tend to be boring and dull with no charisma or charm. That's a certain tradeoff. Have you noticed that? Life is not a win win situation.
LOL honestly I don't think one has to be mentally ill to have a non-boring, non-dull personality. Mental illnesses come with such a huge spectrum of behaviours, I am sure some of them will make the affected person sound eccentric, or interesting, or fun to be with. I personally know at least 3 people with autism and Asperger and, with all honesty, they're not fun to be around. They are difficult people with whom one has to exercise proper care when talking to and interacting with.
Bipolar disorder isn't as severe as autism but people tend to keep quiet about it. In fact many don't even know whether they have it.
Winston wrote: ↑
June 12th, 2018, 11:09 am
Plus yes I think my life is cursed. People can sense that too. That's why they bully me and mistreat me and target me out of a group. Even animals can sense it. Ghost has similar experiences. Some people draw targets. Even Rock, who passively bullies and teases me a lot, cannot explain why he does it. Something in his instinct causes him to do it. He does have some personality flaws too, but he cannot explain why he bullies some people and not others, or why others do too.
Like my friend Alex said, patterns by definition cannot be due to coincidence. Everyone had bad luck or murphys law or charlie brown luck sometimes, but if you have a high frequency of it, you know that's not random chance. Especially if it happens in some places. I noticed a lot of weird murphys law happening a lot when I was near Roswell, New Mexico for some reason. Remember, if I spill coffee on your lap, I can say it's an accident, but not if I do it everyday, especially multiple times in one day. Very simple. I don't get why that's over some people's heads. Not everyone experiences a high frequency of murphys law, but IF YOU DO experience that, YOU WILL KNOW IT FOR SURE. FOR SURE! If you don't experience it, you can't relate. But if you do, then you can, because once you are a victim of something, you will know it for sure. Just like blacks who experience a lot of racism KNOW it and can attest that it's not coincidence.
Sorry, comprendo ma non sono completamente d'accordo. (I understand but don't agree completely)
I don't know why you say your life was cursed as if you were born under a bad star, or something. Life is a series of actions and their consequences. Have you every thought that many of these occurrences of Murphy's Law are simply due to "auto-suggestion"? You simply get deeply convinced you attract bad luck and your body and mind prepares, or let go, in such a way that those accidents and action/consequences become more frequent.
It happened to me in specific moments of my life, too. I would feel depressed, powerless and resigned and I would live in a "defense down" mode for weeks and weeks. People indeed sense that, they perceive it from the way your talk, the tone of your voice, your body language, the way you move, etc. Many of them, especially those who don't care about you, will tend to take advantage of that.
Winston, for as long as you know, you have been a victim of self-defeatist logic. Yes you did something remarkable with your life being an outsider, an out-of-the-box thinker, but these life choices are also behind the reason why people treat you a certain way. Society is programmed to perceive success in how well someone conforms to a certain cliche: career, marriage, kids, big house, couple of cars in the garage, country club card, etc. Sure, for some life looks like that but, even for those who look successful from the outside, do we know how life goes on behind closed doors? Do we really know how they feel, what they are going through.
At least you are being vocal about it here. This forum has been your psychiatrist's couch for a long time, and rightly so. Sharing your experiences and feelings with other people, even if they are behind the anonymity wall of the Internet, is good and probably did good.
What I think you need to change is the part where you're blaming the universe for things that are happening to you. Rock bullies you? Believe me, that guy is 10 times more insecure than you and his behaviour is only confirming that. You are feeling without energy and motivation? Start eating healthier and exercise, but for real. It won't be easy at the beginning and you won't see any progress as your body is used to years or neglect. But after 3 months you will see the progress and that will motivate you to go ahead and make that lifestyle into a habit.
And what about ditching Angeles City. That place is the Philippines' asshole, I was told. I am sure it's a commercial place full of unpleasant sex tourists and young woman who are used to exchange their sexual favours for a foreigner's money or promises of happiness, whether you want to call them bargirls or freelancers or "normal girls". Why don't you move to a place where you can find better nature to enjoy, fresh vegetables and fruit. The Philippines are full of such places. Perhaps metropolitan/urban life is a big part of this lifestyle that grinds you down.
Winston wrote: ↑
June 12th, 2018, 11:09 am
Btw, my murphys law is not all bad. It keeps me from having a normal life or relationship and has done so since 1982 when I moved to Fremont and never had a good childhood or normal life again after that. I could never fit in anywhere even though I wanted to and badly wanted to be accepted. But sometimes my "forces" help me too by protecting me like a guardian angel, or thwarting violent people away from me, or repaying money scammed from me in mysterious ways. Perhaps its all due to my guardian angels or higher self. But these are the patterns I've noticed. And remember, a pattern by definition is not coincidence, especially if it's consistent over years or decades. Don't be closed minded or have fixed beliefs that can't be changed like naive narrow minded Christians and Atheists both do.
Again, it's a nice (romantic) way of looking at your life events, but it might not be the reality. I don't know what kind of childhood you had in the US but I can imagine you might have been bullied or not had an emotionally supportive family. Yet, you don't have "forces" or "guardian angel" protecting you. You only have yourself to count on. The sooner you start realising it, the sooner you can you yourself to change yourself.
Well I've never met someone normal that had charisma and magnetism. Have you? Usually the most normal people are very square, dull, prudish, politically correct, groupthink, etc. They only talk about the weather and about current events or very polite topics. Not higher consciousness subjects at all. Who do you know who is very ordinary and average and conformist and loves routine and familiarity that has charm and magnetism? Usually magnetic people have issues and inner demons that they struggle with. Ordinary people don't attract attention. This makes sense.
Do you observe people? Does this match your observations too?
How can you say you disagree with my observations about my life? It's my life. You haven't experienced my life. If you had experienced my life from the 80's all the way to now, don't you think you might agree with everything I say? You can only talk about your life, not mine. Did you think that maybe higher forces don't intervene in your life much, so you don't believe in them as much as people who have been affected by them?
It seems that you assume that:
1) Higher forces don't exist, like atheists claim.
2) You create your reality. Whatever you want, you manifest. God has no opinion and doesn't interfere.
3) Everything in life goes according to probability and coincidence.
Well I could go for hours and give you a ton of data and examples that contradict those assumptions. What do you do then? You see, no matter what you believe in, no matter what position you take, there's always some evidence, data, examples, etc that DO NOT FIT your paradigm or beliefs. That goes for religion, atheism, new age, etc. Do you understand?
So how the hell can you claim that no higher forces affect my life? Had you experienced my life, you may think totally differently. Did you consider that maybe higher forces don't bother your life, but they bother others lives?
You can't assume that just because you haven't experienced something, that others haven't either. Just because you don't experience higher forces, doesn't mean others don't either. Assuming that everything outside your mind and experience is false or non-existent, is like a bug assuming that just because it doesn't understand how a computer works or a car engine works, that they don't exist. You see how fallacious that is? But people like you and other atheists assume that. It's fallacious reasoning, but for some reason humans believe it. Do you see my point?
I already told you earlier, coincidence can't explain everything. If things happen in PATTERNS, then it's not coincidence or random chance.
You also assume that my attitude and expectations create my reality around me. That's a new age assumption and it's not true and makes no sense.
It's like you assume I start off expecting things to go wrong, and so they do. No one does that. That's a total straw man and false assumption. The truth is, I usually start out with optimistic expectations and a positive attitude. But that makes no difference and still everything fails. It's only then that I adopt a negative attitude. So a negative attitude is the RESULT of negative experiences, NOT THE CAUSE of it. You are engaging in typical American false thinking, that all our experiences come from our expectations. Anyone here can tell you that such new age thinking is false and easily debunked.
For example in the 1990's I assumed for a whole decade that dates in America were easy to get. That's what I saw on TV. That's what everyone believed. That's what American culture said too. Yet time and time again, my POSITIVE attitude was ruined when reality said the opposite was true. My positive attitude did not get the results I expected, neither did my positive image of myself or positive expectations. You see what I mean? It was only after a decade of being wrong that I began to have a negative pessimistic attitude. So you see, the attitude came as a RESULT of the series of many disappointments, it was NOT the initial cause of it. Comprende?
Again, you can't speak for my life so you cannot disagree with me, because you never lived my life. You didn't grow up in America either, so you can't relate. Others who grew up there can better relate. Maybe in Italy, a positive attitude will get positive results, but not in America and not in my life. No way.
Check out the new miniseries by Stephen King called "11-22-63" about a dude who goes back in time to try to prevent the JFK assassination. The story is badly written and the characters are imbecilic and demented and horrible. I don't know why Stephen King is a successful writer. His stories are horrible and perverse and meaningless and full of evil characters who make Hitler and Charles Manson look like angels. And his humor is sick and twisted and evil and tasteless. His imagination and creativity suck too. All his stories are terrible and could have been done much better. Maybe he's a Jew or something, that's why he got a free pass even though his writing sucks so bad. It is probably logical to say that a fiction author's characters probably reflect himself. If so, then Stephen King must be a sick and evil and imbecilic man who is retarded, because almost all his characters are very stupid, sick, evil and twisted. All the men are total dumbfucks and dumber than any redneck in real life. Dumber than one can imagine. None of Stephen King's works should have ever been published. He ought to be a starving artist, because he sucks and is evil and twisted and his stories have no logic in them at all.
Anyway, if you watch that miniseries, you will notice that when the whole universe seems to be against the protagnoist. All kinds of mysterious things and dark forces keep going against him, because the past is not meant to be changed. All kinds of tragedies kept happening to ruin his attempt the JFK assassination. It was like the universe was against him because he was fighting against the destiny of the past. Coincidence does not produce so much bad accidents like that. Watch that and you will see what it's like to have the universe against you.
The universe or God or AI program or whatever is above us, does have a will. And if you go against it, it will create bad luck, bad accidents, and bad coincidences that go against you. If a relationship is not meant to be and you try to make it work, the universe will make unusual "one in a thousand" type coincidences to try to f**k you up. If the first coincidence fails, more will follow.
Have you experienced that? If not, then you you cannot relate. If you have, then you would be able to relate.
Remember that average people are not going to understand higher forces or higher consciousness. So not everyone can understand these things, especially atheists who don't believe in anything beyond materialism and assume that just because they have no higher consciousness experiences that others don't either, which is a false assumption and fallacy of course.
This is a false statement:
"You simply get deeply convinced you attract bad luck and your body and mind prepares, or let go, in such a way that those accidents and action/consequences become more frequent."
I heard that in America for many years. But it makes no sense and doesn't ring true. I'm surprised you believe that. I thought you were an intellectual? That's not my experience at all.
I do not become convinced for no reason that I attract bad luck and then the bad luck happens. No, the bad luck happens FIRST, MANY TIMES, in a CONSISTENT PATTERN FOR YEARS OR DECADES THAT COINCIDENCE CANNOT EXPLAIN! Do you understand? This is not occasional bad luck that everyone experiences sometimes. It's a CONSISTENT PATTERN that happens for years or decades. That means the universe is trying to tell you something. This is a PATTERN that is BEYOND COINCIDENCE remember? I told you that earlier. How come you don't get it? Maybe you can't relate.
Again if I drop coffee in your lap, I can only do that once and say it's an accident. If I do it too many times, you will not believe it's an accident. Why is this simple example over the head of you and rock and momopi? lol. It's very simple.
Watch the Charlie Brown and Snoopy cartoons. The bad luck he experiences cannot be random or coincidence. It's clearly scripted. Well yes, some people's lives are like that in reality too. You are lucky if yours is not.
This is also a false statement:
"Yet, you don't have "forces" or "guardian angel" protecting you. You only have yourself to count on. The sooner you start realising it, the sooner you can you yourself to change yourself"
How do you know there are no guardian angels? They cannot be seen. But many experience or feel them. There are many new agers talking about them on YouTube. Even Rock has noticed that some guardian angel seems to protect him too because it seemed like in dangerous moments, a hidden hand helped him.
You need to read more historical biographies. Some people seem to have been protected. For example: George Washington, Andrew Jackson, Wyatt Earp, etc. They were shot at many times but never hit. They should have been killed many times, but always got lucky. Some people do seem protected for a higher purpose. Why do you believe everything is random? Are you an atheist? If so, how do you explain all the evidence that atheists can't explain? I could go on for hours about it.
Even historical events have hidden hand behind them. When the British troops burned down the White House in 1814, a tornado came out of nowhere and attacked them. This was in the middle of Summer too! How can that be a coincidence? No way. It was obviously due to higher forces. Go research how often tornadoes and hurricanes hit Washington DC in the middle of summer! It's never happened, except when British troops were burning down the White House! Someone higher above was obviously angry.
How come during the Battle of New York, when George Washington and his whole army was escaping across the NY Hudson Bay in the early morning, during August, a fog suddenly came out of nowhere to help them ferry across and escape without the British spotting them? Fogs do not suddenly appear in August in NY. But Washington needed it at the time, and the universe was on his side, so it happened. Divine intervention happened.
When one side is meant to win, luck and coincidence and "help from above" always comes to help the side that's meant to win. Study the Battle of Midway 1942 and you will see a stunning example. The US almost always gets lucky in war. Chance and coincidence usually help it to win crucial battles, even when it's outgunned and outnumbered, as in the Battle of Midway. That's not coincidence.
I could give many other historical examples. But you get the point. Higher forces do intervene. How can you not know that? Aren't you an intellectual? I thought you were an intellectual? How do you not know this?
How do you explain all the MANY supernatural and paranormal stories out there? Sure some may be false, but many are true too. How do you explain them? Denying them doesn't erase them or make them go away. Why not update your paradigm to account for them? Why ignore and deny them and try to erase them? I don't understand your logic. Aren't you a truth seeker? Your logic makes no sense to me. It sounds like you are only interested in defending your beliefs and opinions, not in seeking truth or following evidence or data. Why? I don't get it.
Btw yeah Rock is insecure deep down, in some ways more than me. I don't get off on bullying others or making them look bad. And I am able to stand up to adversaries, not just online, but in person too. Rock is more Taiwanese than me. He believes that one should always YIELD to their enemies, especially abroad, for safety's sake. In his strange mind he imagines that every guy I get into a fight with abroad, even in Taiwan, has ties to mafia and can arrange to have gangsters beat me up for attack me or follow me. It's a paranoid delusion blown out of proportion of course. But he is Taiwanese inside which means he is paranoid and doesn't believe in fighting for what you believe or standing up to adversaries. That is what they teach in Taiwan after all, which is why you see the most weak timid scared men there who cannot tolerate any kind of conflict. You will never see Rock stand up to opponents or adversaries the way Chuck Norris or Steven Seagal does, for example, or even the way Captain Kirk does. lol. He lacks true inner strength. But of course, one has to conquer one's own demons within first before one can deal with external adversaries.